


Such Darling Wrecks

by goldenqrow (seriouslysamson)



Category: RWBY
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Semblances (RWBY), Flashbacks, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Like really slow, Modern Era, Multi, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Child Abuse, Slow Burn, Violence, graphic injury description, medical description
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-07-07 09:50:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 160,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15905883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seriouslysamson/pseuds/goldenqrow
Summary: Qrow is doing fine. So Taiyang's on the other side of the Pacific Ocean, and Qrow's looking after his nieces for the entire school year; that's okay. He's coping just great. Sure, his job sucks and his drinking's as bad as it's ever been, but hey, it can't get any worse, can it? He'll just keep on keeping on, the same way he always has. But life isn't that simple, and a new face showing up at the bar where he works complicates things more than he imagined possible.





	1. Everyday Wreckage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally here! My first fanfiction in four years, and my first ever for RWBY. Where better to start than a small town drama? 'Such Darling Wrecks' is a line from a Sylvia Plath poem named Epitaph for Fire and Flower. Hopefully the meaning of that will become clear...

He woke up all stiff neck and headache, eyes half-glued shut like he hadn’t slept at all. The room spun as he checked the time, then shot out of bed as though rocket-propelled; he’d overslept, again. The dizziness got worse, and he swallowed a wave of nausea, trying to ignore the taste of his own dry mouth.

What kind of a night had he had last night?

The worst thing was that he couldn’t remember, had no memory beyond 8 pm that Sunday evening. And Christ, what kind of person was he becoming that he’d drink himself into a blackout right before he had to get up at eight for work? And this, with his impressionable nieces currently under his guardianship, the night before he was meant to walk them up to their new school for the first time.

Qrow cursed himself as he hurriedly dressed in the nearest dubiously-clean clothes: an out of shape long-sleeve t-shirt and sweatpants. After a cursory sniff to ensure he didn’t stink of booze, he headed out to wake Ruby and Yang. Thankfully, or unfortunately, depending on how he looked at it, they were both more responsible than him: Yang was eating breakfast at the dining table and Ruby was locked in the bathroom. He smirked at the sound of her mumble-singing in the shower as he passed to find his keys, phone, and wallet where he’d left them, tucked into his jeans pocket, in the laundry hamper in the hallway.

Once Ruby finished in the bathroom he rushed in to scrub his teeth and swill mouthwash until he couldn’t taste last night’s whiskey in the back of his throat anymore. He stared at himself in the mirror as he brushed, the same way he did almost every day, wiping the condensation off with his sleeve and making eye contact with himself that made him squint. Eyes just as red as ever, although more bloodshot and ringed with purple than usual. Stubble overgrown, but he didn’t have time to shave this morning. His hair needed washing but that could wait, no one would notice once he got to work. He really was looking scruffy, though, untidy, like he wasn’t looking after himself. Oh, and he’d spilled toothpaste down his shirt.

_Shit._

He changed into another t-shirt, digging this one out of the dresser. It was a band shirt he was pretty sure he hadn’t worn in a decade, but he didn’t have time to care what he looked like. He needed painkillers and something to eat, and to refill his flask for what was sure to be a long and dismal day.

When he reached the main living area of his apartment, Ruby was eating breakfast, watching a video on her phone at the dining table as she shovelled sugary cereal into her mouth. Yang was in the kitchenette, packing both their lunches. Qrow felt a sting of guilt, sure that _he_ should be doing that, but he was relieved nonetheless. She smiled at him as he edged past her to reach the drawer he kept all his medication in.

“Morning Uncle Qrow.” She said. “You look like hell.”

“Hey,” He laughed, a little surprised. “Knock it off.” He paused, and turned to pat her shoulder as she cut two sandwiches into triangles. “Sorry I wasn’t up in time to do that.”

“It’s okay, we always pack our own lunches; dad hasn’t done it for us since I was like, twelve.”

“Oh. Right.”

“Dad isn’t very good at food, anyway.” Ruby piped up, not looking around at them. “He always used to pack us salads and veggie sticks.” She made a disgusted kind of grunt.

Qrow chuckled again as he turned back to the drawer, shoving the box of citalopram back out of sight and taking out the painkillers. He popped two out onto the counter and poured himself a glass of water.

“You want me to make you something to eat, Uncle Qrow?” Yang offered, dropping juice boxes into both backpacks. They still loved those things, even at fifteen and seventeen.

“Oh, no thanks, Firecracker.” He smiled graciously at her. “I’ll do it myself. Thanks though.”

“No problem. I’m gonna go get my notebook and stuff.” She lifted her backpack and walked out of the room.

Qrow was too busy swallowing his painkillers to answer, but he turned to Ruby once she was gone. “Did you pack your school supplies?”

She finally turned from her breakfast and nodded, smiling widely like always. “Yep! I even remembered my assigned book!”

“Good.” He looked over, catching her drinking the cereal milk out of the bowl like Tai always told her not to. He didn’t say anything, just gave her a withering look. “When you’re done with that, go get your shoes, we need to go soon.”

She finished the milk and let out a happy little sigh. “Okay!” Leaping up from her seat, she dumped her bowl on the counter, picked up her phone and backpack, and ran from the room.

Qrow winced a bit as he watched her go: she was shaping up to be a sprinter, said she wanted to sign up for track at school this year, but she was damn heavy footed on the laminate even in socks. He wondered what his second floor neighbours thought he was doing up here.

Once he was certain she was gone, he grabbed his hip flask from the drying rack where he’d left it last night and opened the top cabinet next to the refrigerator. An array of bottles looked back at him, some mostly-empty, others almost full. He pulled out the one closest to him and began tipping the vodka into the flask’s narrow opening, his hands shaking. Clear alcohol when he was at work: that was the deal. Some sense of plausible deniability.

He emptied the bottle and quickly rinsed it out to throw it into the recycling box under the sink, buried under a few grocery bags. Then he tucked the flask into the pocket of his sweatpants. Once he got to work it would go under the bar, but for now its shape could be hidden under his baggy clothes. Finally, feeling almost ready for the day ahead despite his continually pounding head, he snatched one of Yang’s awful ‘healthy’ granola bars out of the cabinet to eat as they walked up to the school. If it was cereal, it was breakfast, right?

They set off shortly after, Qrow trailing behind his nieces despite being the one who knew where to go. Every now and then he called ahead for them to turn left or right through a mouthful of granola and dried fruit, or yelled at Ruby to watch where she was going as she crossed roads with reckless abandon. The morning sun lit them both up, and while he could barely catch the content of their quiet conversation, it made him smile to hear them giggling together.

Ruby was dressed like she always dressed, lifelong hater of jeans that she was, although she’d forgone her usual skirt for knee-length denim shorts, and a red hoodie that complemented the scuffed black backpack with the rose on it that she’d carried since middle school. Yang on the other hand… well, she dressed like Raven had when she was Yang’s age: cargo pants cuffed at the ankle, skate shoes and mismatched socks, a t-shirt she’d insistently bought from the men’s section last week when Qrow had taken them shopping for school supplies. Her backpack, neon yellow and orange, was a little hard to look at when the light hit it.

As he led them from behind, up Vale’s main street and towards the area at the east of town where it met the hills, he couldn’t help but be proud of them. Of course, they were barely his to be proud of: Taiyang had raised them, mostly alone. Raven had left within a few weeks of Yang’s birth, as soon as she was okay to travel, and Summer…

He sighed as he remembered her, allowed his weakness to her back in for a brief moment before it became too much. Summer had been gone for a long time: Twelve years. Ruby barely remembered her, he knew, he’d asked her once, regretfully, when he was drunk. Ruby had cried and when he’d tried to comfort her she’d shied away. He didn’t blame her. Yang remembered, in the hazy way you hold onto memories from when you’re five. She had called her Mom until she was fifteen, at which point she’d met Raven for the first time and given up on calling _anyone_ Mom anymore. Qrow thought it was a shame Raven had tarnished even Summer’s image, but he understood Yang’s reasoning. Raven was lost faith incarnate.

When they finally reached the gates of Beacon High School, Ruby stopped and looked around, staring over the town and the distant beach, the ocean beyond it glimmering.

“Wow, I can see your apartment from up here, Uncle Qrow!” She said brightly, clinging to her backpack straps.

Qrow smiled. “You sure can.” He focused his gaze on the distant building, orange brick cube he’d made some sort of life for himself in. It felt weird, seeing it from up here. He didn’t venture uptown often.

He said goodbye to them both, Yang eager enough to get going that she didn’t stop for a hug, just laughed and ducked as he tousled her hair. Ruby, however, wrapped her arms tightly around his waist for a moment, and he hugged her tightly back.

“You think you can make your way home on your own, then?” Qrow asked as she pulled away.

“Yep! It’s actually pretty easy to get up here, I think we’ll figure it out.”

“Good. I’ll be done around nine tonight.”

“I know.”

“Good.” He repeated, meeting her silvery eyes and smiling. “Good luck with your first day, kid.”

“Thanks, Uncle Qrow. Have a great day at work!”

“I’ll do my best.”

And with that she turned and left, pausing just inside the gates to smile and wave before running after her sister, whose golden hair shone in the morning sun. He watched them for another agonising moment, feeling the odd desperate pull that he supposed parents felt when they sent their kids off to school, though it was distant. Then, as they headed inside, he turned away, already feeling the urge to take a pull from his flask. But there was work to do.

* * *

 

He’d taken the opening shift so that he could walk Ruby and Yang up here and see them after school. He still didn’t really see why a bar, even one that served food, needed to open at 9 am, but he wasn’t the owner, just the manager. And he had to admit, The Gold Bar was rarely empty. Sure, you might call it dead, but even at opening, there’d be some night-shifter sitting at the bar with an early morning beer, someone at one of the tables in the side room enjoying breakfast and coffee. And today, when he arrived, there was someone else waiting outside for him.

“You’re late.” Winter pushed her bangs back with a look that could freeze, for a moment looking the spitting image of her powerful father.

“You’re early.” Qrow grumbled back as he unlocked the door.

Winter dropped the act and smirked as she walked past him into the bar.

He’d never expected to get on with a Schnee, never really expected to do anything other than tolerate one. Everyone knew them, for all the wrong reasons: they were snobbish, rich, with a heightened sense of self-importance. But then, Winter didn’t call herself a Schnee anymore; she barely used her surname at all if she could help it. Qrow didn’t know exactly why Jacques, the cold bastard, had cut her off, and he didn’t need to. All he cared about was that she was hardworking, willing to learn, and not a complete asshole.

Never mind that the two of them bickered and insulted each other anytime they were in a room together; as far as he was concerned, that was as close as he got to friendship with most people.

She hurried into the kitchen to prep for breakfast, and Qrow set about making the place presentable for the few morning customers they got. He put the sign advertising five dollar breakfast out front on the sidewalk and pinned the glass door open to let the aroma of sizzling bacon drift into the street. He had to wipe down a few dusty surfaces that he’d forgotten to clean on Saturday night when he’d closed up, and he noted that there was fine, sparkly powder in the rubber-backed rug behind the bar, evidence that someone (probably him) had dropped a glass. He couldn’t remember: there were a lot of dark spots in his Saturday night shift.

He vacuumed up the glass as best he could with the crappy dust buster they kept behind the bar. Feeling satisfied with what he’d done so far, he snuck his flask out of his pocket and took a swig, just a small one. A reward, and hair of the dog for his still aching and spinning head. He was stashing it back below the bar when Amber walked in, almost tripping over the threshold.

“Oops! Morning!” She called cheerily, as Qrow poked his head back over the bar.

“Oh. Hey Amber.” He gave her a half-smile and straightened up. “You’re a little late.”

“I know, sorry! I had to sort some stuff out with our landlord. It won’t happen again.”

“Ah, it’s not like it matters anyway.” He gestured around at the empty bar. “Just go ahead and get started, Winter will appreciate it.”

“Okay.” She gave him another smile and headed into the kitchen, where he heard her greet Winter like they hadn’t left the same apartment half an hour apart.

He’d never really understood greeting someone like you hadn’t seen them in years when you had. But maybe other people appreciated each other more.

It was nine-nineteen when the first customer walked in, a frail-looking old man who barely came up to Qrow’s chest. He came in every day, and ordered the same each time: black tea, eggs Benedict, and orange juice. Qrow made his drinks and let him take a seat as his food was finished up. Winter had gotten very good at the poached eggs, but it still sometimes took Amber a couple of tries for them not to fall apart in the water.

Finally, the dish came out from the kitchen, and Qrow walked it over to the old guy’s table like he always did. The guy tipped two dollars, one for him, one for the kitchen, like he always did. He stuffed both notes into the jar on the bar to be divided up later. Like he always did. Qrow only took the day shift maybe once a month: An, who had switched with him to take the night shift tonight, had a son in high school, a teenage lodger, and a husband in the military. It was usually easier on her to open than close. Still, Qrow knew the habits of _every_ regular, from those who arrived at 9 am for an unashamedly bad coffee to those who came in right before last call, ordered six shots at once, and then left.

He knew the lonely kids who came in with parents and sat, bored, for hours as they drank. He knew the local high schoolers who would come in for a soda or shake and make more noise than he thought possible in the corner booth near the window. He sometimes regretted that this place was family friendly, but at least those kids were always laughing. Sometimes he wished he could make a new rule, that only the kids old enough to choose for themselves could come in.

Not that kids were his only regulars; the adults weren’t as loud but most of them weren’t as bearable either. The Gold Bar sat in the more affluent part of town, and the annoying PTA-fanatic white moms and self-aggrandizing country club members sighed and flapped over the ‘adaptable’ nature of a bar that served so many different things. Personally, Qrow thought Salem, the owner, was trying to be a little ‘Jack of all trades, master of none’ with the extensive menu, but hey; most of the stuff they served got delivered frozen and heated up in the kitchen, with only the breakfast foods really that fresh. No one seemed to know any better.

He’d gotten to know some of them, the nicer ones, the ones who seemed to want to talk. Some of them he got on with; hell, some of them he even liked. Old Ghira Belladonna, despite wearing his shirts unbuttoned to show most of his chest hair, was a decent guy, if somewhat boisterous once he had a few drinks in him. Port, who taught up at Beacon High, came in once a week on Friday nights to drink red wine at the bar, round frame stuffed in the corner by the wall as he talked Qrow’s ear off. And while he rambled a bit when he was sober and a lot more once he was tipsy, he’d kept Qrow entertained through many long shifts.

There were lots of others, of course, many whose interactions with Qrow were so brief he barely registered them. A few who had caught his eye for being terrible customers and terrible people. Marcus Black was one of the ones who pissed him off the most. Everybody knew Marcus, and everybody hated him. It was an open secret that the man was a violent alcoholic, and that the bruises his son went to school with weren’t accidents. But he was a quiet drinker, and never tried anything in the bar, so Qrow was forced to leave him be. If he ever _did_ try anything, Qrow would have a right hook or two ready and waiting for him.

His worst customer, though, was a young woman. He’d only ever heard her referred to as Cinder, and scoffed to himself every time he heard it. It had to be a fake name, or the world’s dumbest nickname. She was a slim, statuesque woman with an attitude like whiplash, ashen-white skin and black hair always falling over her eyes. She came in at least twice a week, each time with a different group, though Qrow was starting to recognise some of the repeats. She would disparage those she wasn’t with to those who were present, would backhandedly compliment Qrow every time she ordered drinks, and overall talked in such a saccharine, sarcastic manner that he often turned up whatever music was playing when she came in as if it would block her out.

What made it worth it, for Qrow, were the people who came in from out of town. The newcomers, the strange faces, people who’d come here once and never again, maybe post a review on Yelp about how cute the interior was or how good the cooked-from-frozen pasta had been. He liked when they came in early or in the dead period between three and six, and if they sat at the bar like they often did he’d introduce himself, ask a few gentle questions about where they were from and where they were going.

He’d never been much of a people person, and still wasn’t outside work, but here, with the barrier of the bar and the gentle buzz of alcohol on everyone, conversations seemed easier.

* * *

 

The day slid by, time running at the pace of molasses. Mondays were always slow, even on the evening shift. Summer was about over; there were noticeably fewer tourists around. By four, Qrow had half-emptied his flask and paid for two cans of diet coke from the chiller, both of which he’d carefully spiked, chasing straight vodka with mixed. He felt happily buzzed, a lot more able to deal with the two bitchy teenagers carrying backpacks who’d tried to short-change him for sodas and then gotten mad when he wouldn’t hand them over.

They were gone, though, and he was looking down at his flask as he wiped off a glass when he became aware of a presence in front of him.

The first thing that struck him was that the man was tall, taller than Qrow felt any human had the right to be, taller even than his friend James who was built like an ancient oak tree. The second thing was that his hair was reflecting the lights of the dumb gold globe lights in the ceiling; it was almost silver in colour, not greyed with age, not pale blond, not bleached. Silver and untidy, nearly shoulder length, hanging over eyes that were wearing the stupidest pair of tiny round sunglasses Qrow had ever seen. He was wearing a three-piece suit and tie in black over a neat green shirt.

He became aware that he was frowning, and tried to appear more neutral. “Hey, what can I get you?”

“A hot cocoa, please.” He had an implacable accent, but it certainly wasn’t local.

Qrow blinked a couple of times. Of all the things he’d expected this man to order, hot cocoa wasn’t it. “Uh, sure. Small, regular, or large?”

“Regular, please.”

“Okay, anything else?”

“That’s all, thank you.”

“Alright, that’s three dollars, please.”

The man handed him a five dollar bill. Qrow quickly grabbed his change out of the register, and found himself again staring curiously as the man took it and immediately dropped it into the tip jar.

“Take a seat wherever you like, it’ll be with you in a minute.” He gestured to the empty stools at the bar, and watched as the man sat down in the one right in front of the register, taking off his glasses and stowing them in a pocket. Then he turned away to the espresso machine and got to work foaming some milk, mixing in the cocoa powder until it was smooth and then transferring the whole thing to a mug and topping it up with chilled milk.

“Cream?” Qrow asked over his shoulder.

“No, thank you.”

He nodded and picked up the mug, carefully carrying it over to where the man was sitting and depositing it in front of him. “There.”

“Thank you.” The man turned the mug so that the handle faced his left hand and laced his fingers around it, though didn’t pick it up.

Qrow tried to busy himself with wiping another water-marked glass, but he was getting truly drunk now, and couldn’t stop himself:

“So, I’m guessing you’re not from around here?”

The man looked shocked at having been spoken to again, but he quickly gave a quiet chuckle. “As a matter of fact, I am.”

“Really?” Qrow quirked an eyebrow, feeling sure that if this man had been around town he’d have noticed him. How could anyone not notice him? But then, none of the other bar patrons were paying attention now. Maybe he had never been paying attention.

“Really.” The man took a sip of his hot chocolate, and nodded appreciatively. “I’ve lived in Vale for many years. Though I am new to this particular establishment.”

Qrow replied with something that was half-snort, half-confused hum. Still cleaning, cleaning away at that glass in his hands, like he’d rub through the damn thing if he didn’t find something else to do with his hands.

He put the glass and the dishcloth down and took a sip of spiked coke from the can under the counter, quickly stashing it back out of sight. There was a stiff silence where he felt like he was being watched. And then one of the girls pushed a dessert through the kitchen hatch, and as he took it to the right table he felt odd, like he should have excused himself from the presence of the man at the bar. His company felt oddly intimate, and even as he was leaving he caught him looking at him over the top of the mug, assessing. He didn’t make eye contact, even when he returned with an armful of dirty plates to push into the dish tray.

“May I ask your name?” The man across the bar asked suddenly.

Qrow froze up. It was rare, very rare, for first-time customers to want to know him well enough for a name. Some of the most talkative ones had never asked. But, with effort, he turned and nodded. “Sure. It’s Qrow. Qrow Branwen.”

“I see.”

“Aren’t you gonna tell me yours?” He asked, feeling a sort of amused, bewildered annoyance shape his words.

“If you’d like to hear it. My name is Ozpin.”

Once again, Qrow’s eyebrow quirked almost of its own volition. It was a fucking odd name, that was for sure, and he felt like he’d heard it before… No, not heard it, read it. Somewhere. “Interesting.” He managed to reply.

“Interesting indeed.” Ozpin smiled.

Qrow busied himself with more tasks behind the bar, still feeling that he was being observed, silently interrogated. He suddenly, unreasonably wished that he had worn nicer clothes today, and had to pause to wonder why before he shook it off.

 _Denial, Qrow_. He shook his head at himself.

There was the familiar screech of barstool on scuffed wood floor and Ozpin placed his mug down within Qrow’s reach, ready to be washed.

“Thank you, that was lovely.” He stood again, and picked up a cane leaning on the bar that Qrow hadn’t noticed before, hadn’t been paying attention to. “It was nice to meet you, Qrow.”

“Uh… Sure. You too.” Qrow muttered inelegantly. He watched as Ozpin gave him a nod and a smile, then walked out of the bar swinging the cane at his side. He didn’t limp; in fact he seemed spry, despite his silver hair and odd manner of speaking that could have put him anywhere between thirty and ninety. He turned left out of the door, passing by the window, and Qrow noticed him put his strange little sunglasses back on, and then he was gone.

Qrow drained the last of his spiked coke and then reached into the chiller to prepare another one. “Fucking weird.” He mumbled to no one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have 14 more chapters of this story ready to go, so I'm going to set a tentative update schedule of every Wednesday and Saturday for a while. If you have any questions or you think I've missed a tag or a warning, let me know! I will be updating them for future chapters, so missing characters may turn up when they have bigger parts. Thanks for reading!


	2. Different Kinds of Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruby's first day at her new high school has not been great. Qrow isn't really sure how to deal with that. Warnings: References to bullying and homophobia, nightmares.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A heads-up on this I really should have given last chapter: This story is as much about Qrow's life as it is about his relationship with Ozpin, so Oz might not show up in every chapter. He'll be back, though!

Qrow stuck with mixed drinks through the rest of his shift, bringing his buzz down to a level at which he could safely cook dinner when he got home, talk to Ruby and Yang about school without making a fool of himself. Winter and Amber left just before nine when no more food orders had come in, both looking worn down. They needed more people in the kitchen, a dedicated dishwasher at the very least, and Yang wanted a part-time job, but if Salem didn’t ask Qrow to hire, he couldn’t hire. Some people referred to The Gold Bar as Qrow’s bar, but he didn’t have half the control they thought. Sure, he could kick out a rowdy customer, take his time with his work, but he didn’t have a say in how the place was run. Not really.

He grabbed his flask from under the bar and set off into the evening air. It was still warm out, even as night was rapidly falling, the sky a deep navy blue and sprinkled with stars. As he walked back to the apartment block he thought about Ruby and Yang there, wondered what they were doing and if they’d gotten sick of waiting for him and eaten already. They usually did that anyway: His night shifts were 2 pm to 2 am. Some days so far he’d cooked something in the morning and put it in the fridge for them to reheat when they got hungry, which had the added bonus of giving Qrow something simple to eat when he got home too. But though he was trying, he wasn’t sure he was really doing right by them.

Qrow knew that an ideal parent was not drunk most of the time, and didn’t constantly risk their job by drinking at work. An ideal parent was there when their kids needed them, had time for them, listened to them. An ideal parent wasn’t gone twelve hours a day and useless for the rest. He knew that from experience.

But Qrow _wasn’t_ a parent, not really, and he certainly wasn’t ideal.

They should have been with Tai, and he wished that they were. But Tai had work responsibilities, forty or so kids in China to teach English to, even though Qrow knew for damn sure he wished he could take more time with his own daughters. But Tai wouldn’t say no to anyone in need, and he’d filled that vacancy with little hesitation, and now he was in Qingdao, seventeen hours and half the goddamn world away. But Qrow had promised, sworn on his life to take care of Ruby and Yang. And he would. He just felt he wasn’t very good at it.

The trouble was he didn’t _get_ them, he’d been toughened up by the injustices of the world before he was their age. Every bruise and scar and broken bone had clammed him up a little more, and now with over two decades on them he barely remembered what being a teenager was like. But, that wasn’t how life was meant to be. They were _supposed_ to be fragile, they _should_ have wild emotions, having fun and being a kid was _normal_. Qrow just couldn’t relate.

More than anything he wished Summer was still around, because if she and Tai were still together, and they would be, she’d have stayed home with the kids and known exactly what to do. Or she’d have taken the whole family over to Qingdao, and known exactly what to do, and Qrow would still be a lonely drunk with his bachelor apartment and a lot of issues.

He supposed not everything would change if she was here.

* * *

 

The two flights of stairs up to his apartment felt like a mountain, and when he finally let himself in the front door, he went straight to the couch and collapsed onto it. Being behind a bar all day was a lot of time on his feet, and he wasn’t as young as he used to be, and every time he’d crouch behind the bar his left knee would make grinding noises and shoot pain down his shin.

Yang was sitting at his desk playing some shooter on his PC, but she’d paused it as he’d walked in. She span around in the chair, taking two full rotations before she stopped to face him.

“Hey.” Qrow managed to sigh.

“Long day?” Yang asked.

“No longer than usual.” He dragged himself out of the couch, reluctantly, and stood up. “Did you and Ruby eat already?”

“Yeah, I made some spaghetti, there’s leftover sauce and meat in the fridge, but there’s no pasta left. I hope that’s okay.”

“I told you, while you’re staying here, what’s mine is yours.” He shrugged. “Anyway, I’m amazed you two left me anything, the amount you can pack away.” He smirked at her, and she folded her arms over her chest.

“We’re growing.” The words had an indignation to them, half-joking though it was.

“I know you are.” Qrow raised his hands in a gesture of peace. “Where’s Ruby?”

“In our room, doing her homework. I already did mine, before you ask.”

“Good.”

“Qrow… she’s been kinda weird tonight.” Yang’s expression went soft and worried. “I think something happened at school, but she won’t talk to me about it.”

Qrow’s eyes narrowed. “What kinda something?”

“I don’t know! She was fine when we talked at lunch, she seemed to be making friends, but then when we walked home she was… just really quiet.”

Quiet on Ruby was a bad sign, and Qrow nodded. “I’ll go talk to her.” He made to leave the room, but paused. “When I’m sure she’s okay, I’ll come back and you can tell me how _your_ day was, too.”

Yang cracked a smile. “Sure.”

Qrow hurried out of the room and down the hall to the bedroom Ruby and Yang were sharing. He was worried; it took a lot to make Ruby Rose go quiet, especially in her sister’s presence. It wouldn’t be the first time there had been trouble with cruel kids, if that was it.

_In middle school it had been mild: they’d called her weird, freak, and Ruby had stood up to them and agreed,_ and so what if I am _. Qrow had been proud of her for that, proud of Yang and Tai for teaching it to her. But she could only stand up to the middle school bullies after being hardened by the elementary school ones._

_Kids in that age where they’d figured out how to hurt people but hadn’t got a grip on empathy yet were the most dangerous thing in the world. Even when Ruby was in kindergarten and Yang in second grade, kids had teased them for not having a mom. Yang was old enough to scream that her mom was dead, not old enough to think of Raven as her mom yet, but that only made things worse. Then it was dead mother jokes all over the playground and Ruby coming home crying because she was starting to understand, Yang getting in trouble for all the fist fights she started when they wouldn’t let off._

_There had been other bullying too. When Tai and Qrow had been living together, and sometimes picked the girls up from school together, speculation had begun. It was among the teachers, mostly, but Qrow always felt rather than saw them staring. That was, until some eagle-eyed fifth-grader caught sight of him kissing Tai’s cheek one day before they reached the school gate, and from then on it had been relentless. ‘Two dads’: Now that was a liability, especially in a school with apathetic homophobes for teachers who wouldn’t do anything about the bullies._

_He and Tai had stopped seeing other romantically not long after, and Qrow had moved to Vale so he couldn’t make the kids’ lives any worse than he already had._

He knocked softly on the bedroom door and listened.

“Yang, I’m busy!” Ruby called from within, her voice higher pitched than usual.

“I’m not Yang.” Qrow replied.

There was a short silence, and Ruby opened the door, her eyebrows knitted in a sheepish frown. “Sorry.” She said quietly.

“It’s alright. I just wanted to talk to you.”

A deeper frown crossed her face. “Did Yang tell you I was upset? I told her: I’m. Fine.” She clenched her hands into fists at her side.

“No, you’re not. And that’s okay.” Qrow looked down at her sadly. “Come on, kid. Let’s talk about this.”

Ruby sighed, and stepped aside to let him into the bedroom.

There wasn’t much to the place: a desk and chair, an armoire that didn’t hold anywhere near all of both girls’ clothes, and two beds, a single and a double, sharing one bedside table in between. They had taken to swapping beds every time they changed the bedding to make it fair. Right now, Ruby had the single, and she walked over and sat on the edge, hands gripping the covers.

Qrow closed the door and followed, sitting down opposite her on the edge of Yang’s unmade bed, left elbow on left knee. “What’s going on, Ruby?” He asked, as softly as he could manage.

She ducked her head, looking at her knees as she spoke. “Qrow, do you think I’m annoying?”

He frowned. “No, of course I don’t. Who-”

She interrupted him. “I met this girl at school today, I walked into her as she was getting her books and knocked them all over the floor, and she was really mad so I helped her pick them up and said sorry about a million times, and then we had class together last period so I sat next to her and tried to get to know her so she’d know I didn’t do it on purpose and-”

“Ruby, Ruby, slow down.”

She took a deep breath and slowed her rapidly-pitching voice before it could break. “I sat next to her and tried to talk to her, and she didn’t really answer me much but I kept trying, because that’s what Dad would have told me to do. And at the end of class when the bell rang, she…” Ruby sniffled. “She stood up and told me to stop talking to her and stay away from her because I was the most annoying person she’d ever met.” Her voice finally cracked, and though she didn’t sob, her breaths started to shake as tears ran down her face.

“Ruby.” Qrow repeated softly. He’d never been good at dealing with tears, but he got up and moved to sit next to her, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

Ruby leaned into his side and wiped her eyes on her sleeve, sniffling again. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He looked down at her; she seemed even younger and smaller than usual.

She was looking at her hands again. “Is this just what it’s like? Are there people everywhere who just… just want to yell at me and insult me?”

If Qrow still had a heart, this was the moment it broke: it was a physical pain in his chest. And he had no idea what to say. To lie to her and let her keep believing the world was a happy place? Or break her heart too, and confirm that there were assholes everywhere and honestly, she was lucky to have met as few as she had?

“Yeah, that’s kinda what it’s like. There are a lot of people in the world who either get off on other people being unhappy, or have insecurities that make them rude and cruel like that. And there’s a lot of them that are like that because of… y’know, bad pasts, other stuff in their life that’s making them lash out.” He took a deep breath. “But they’re not the only ones. There’s a lot of pretty mediocre people who won’t really affect your life either way, and in amongst all that mess there’s some people who are… really good.” He finished lamely.

“Is it even worth looking for them, though?”

“Well, from what Yang said, you’ve already found a few. She said you’d been making friends before you encountered Ms Mean.”

Ruby sat up and shifted away from him slightly, and managed the sort of chuckle that meant she was humouring his attempts to make her feel better. “Well, I did meet a few people. I met this boy called Jaune, and he introduced me to his friends Pyrrha and Nora and Ren. They were all really nice.” She started to smile a little more genuinely. “Oh, and at lunch I sat with Yang and two of her new friends, they were kinda intimidating but none of them were mean or anything.”

“See, look at that. You met, what, six cool new people, and only one asshole.”

“Qrow!” She frowned disapprovingly at his choice of words.

“Sorry. But still, I’d say you met more than enough decent people to make up for one who was rude, didn’t you?”

“I guess so.” She rubbed at her left inner elbow with her right hand and sighed. “I’m just worried that all those cool people I met thought the same as the mean girl, and were just too scared to say it.”

“I doubt she meant it. Or if she did, she’d change her mind if she knew you better. People just say stuff like that for a reaction, or to upset you. In the long run, it doesn’t actually mean anything. And listen, I’ve spent a lot of time in your company, I’d know by now if you were annoying, and you’re not.” He grinned, and she rolled her eyes with a smile.

“If you say so.”

“I do. Focus on your new friends, and forget about this girl. If you’re really serious about making it up to her, I’d give her a few days to calm down if I were you. Then maybe she’ll be more willing to accept your apology. And if she still won’t, well, big deal. She’s no loss.”

“Right.” She nodded, and this time when she looked up at him there was steel in her eyes. “You’re right. I can’t be negative. I have to focus on the good stuff.”

That was one of Tai’s catchphrases, and seemed to hit Qrow square between the eyes. “Yeah. Exactly.”

Ruby took a deep breath, and wiped her eyes and nose on her sleeve again. “Then that’s what I’ll do. Thanks, Uncle Qrow.”

“No worries, kiddo.” He smiled. “Hey, are you done with your homework?”

She fell back into her usual mannerisms easily, slumping over with a groan. “No, not yet. I have to finish all the math problems Ms Goodwitch set us.”

“Alright. You finish those up. I’ve gotta go eat something, I’m gonna starve to death right here in your bedroom.”

“Okay.” She stood up, and hesitated, awkwardly half-smiling. “Thanks for talking to me. Sorry I yelled at you.”

“It’s alright.” He got up with her, his knee clicking again. “I know you didn’t mean it.”

When he got back to the kitchen, Yang demanded the details of his conversation with Ruby. He shared the basics with her as he reheated the spaghetti sauce, skating over Ruby’s fears about her new friends. If she wanted to share that with Yang, she could, but it wasn’t Qrow’s to tell. Yang was frustrated, and clearly a little mad with the other girl’s unkindness; he bet she would go back to the bedroom before long and demand her name from Ruby so she knew who to look out for. But as Qrow dug around in the cupboard for anything to add to his dinner, he asked Yang about her own day, and she happily divulged her new friends’ names.

She kept going as he picked at the ground beef and marinara on toast, barely paying attention to his food. She even sat opposite him at the dining table, and he realised with a pang that in the two weeks the kids had been here already they’d never all sat down for a meal at the same time. But it was nice to talk with her like that, her enthusiasm almost seeming to set her aglow. She never mentioned any actual classes, of course, just her new friends who longboarded, and hung out at the beach, and one of them, her parents had a cabin in the woods up in the hills, and that sounded like danger to Qrow but he kept his mouth shut and let her enjoy the idea of it.

They’d only be young once.

As he’d predicted, once Qrow had finished eating and she’d helped him load the dishwasher, Yang disappeared back to the bedroom. Qrow took this as his cue to relax, and poured himself a whiskey on the rocks before lying down across the entire couch and flicking on the TV. There was nothing on, not that he cared; he just needed background noise. He checked his phone, but the only notifications were an automated message from his data company and something he didn’t care about from a social media app. He sighed and dumped the thing on the coffee table, screen down and silent, and tried to actually pay attention to the weird horror movie he’d settled on watching.

* * *

 

He didn’t know how long it had taken him to fall asleep, but when he woke up it was 2 am and there was a crick in his neck and a rerun of some sci-fi show on the TV. His eyes hurt even in the dull glow of the screen, and he quickly switched it off and grabbed his phone, nearly knocking over his full glass. The drink he’d been looking forward to was now room temperature whiskey and water. It pained him to throw it away, but he did; he didn’t want to be hungover in the morning anyway.

He stumbled to his bedroom in the dark, using his phone as a flashlight, and quickly stripped down to his underwear. He didn’t remember putting his necklace on this morning, but there it was resting against his sternum, so he removed it and hung it back over the bedpost. When he got into bed, he was expecting to pass out again right away, but as he tucked the comforter around himself, his brain was working hard. It took a moment to work out why, as he thought back through the day for something he might have forgotten, something that might be keeping him up.

And then he remembered the dream, bits of it, at least.

_Yang, still with her seventeen year old attitude but eight inches shorter. The fireplace in the old house in Patch. Both of them crouched around it, Yang with the poker, Qrow throwing things in._

_Photos, stuffed animals, clothes. The images were indistinct but he could feel that they were special somehow. Yang chattering like this was normal… A big blank gap…_

_Maybe here it had shifted into another dream, because then he had been in a foundry, or at least his mental image of what a foundry looked like. He was searching for his nieces, they’d disappeared, and he thought he could hear Ruby crying above the noise of the machinery still moving even though it was unmanned. Shouting their names until he was hoarse._

_And then instead of the girls, coming face to face with a tall man with a prosthetic arm and eyes the colour of gas flames._

He wondered if that was the moment he’d jerked awake.

Obviously he’d been thinking a little too hard today, because while the Patch part didn’t mean much to him, the foundry nightmare was a classic Qrow Branwen stress dream. He had variations on them every few months when the girls were at home with their dad, but he’d had two in the week leading up to their move-in and five more in the two weeks since. His fears were really coming to the surface now, and he resented it. At least now that he’d thought it through, the tension seemed to have gone from him to some degree. He turned over in bed, facing the wall and closing his sore eyes once again.


	3. One-Way Mirror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow makes an effort for once. Ozpin returns to the bar. Warnings: Nightmares, implied/referenced character death, self harm reference.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, this chapter's late because I'm a human disaster and I woke up at midnight, so it's Thursday where I am. But it's here! And I'm particularly fond of this chapter, so I hope you like it.

_It was dark and the house was in ruins, the spacious cabin’s timbers scattered and burning. There was broken glass everywhere. It was silent apart from the crackling of the fire. He couldn’t get any closer._

_She was standing in front of him, looking the way she had last time they’d talked two years ago. Black hair down to her lower back, expression grim as she looked at him down a nose that was crooked from when he’d broken it when they were kids. They swapped places and now she was standing in front of the house, silhouetted against the flames, and he wanted to tell her she had no right to come back here again but the words wouldn’t come out._

_Tai appeared, and fell to his knees, and Raven stood over him and began to smirk. All of a sudden she was holding up a sword with her right hand, her left gripping Tai’s chin and lifting it to get a good shot at his neck._

_And Qrow watched, helpless, as blood fountained._

* * *

 

He woke up with a wave of adrenaline washing over his body, tingling down from his chest and through his legs, breathing a little too hard and sweating under the duvet. He threw it off and checked the time. It was early: only seven-thirty. The nightmare had made it impossible for him to go back to sleep even if he’d wanted to, so instead he just laid still for a moment, remembering the details of it and letting them slip away, bit by bit.

His head pounded for a moment as he sat up, before the pain faded into a dull background ache. His neck still twinged from being jammed onto the couch last night, but overall, things could be much worse. Despite the nightmares and the interruption, he’d slept for longer than he usually managed, and the burning itch in his eyes had finally gone. He even had time to shower before Ruby and Yang got up and hogged the bathroom.

He strolled back into the bedroom in his underwear, damp hair hanging heavy around his eyes. Now that he had time to think about it, he could put on a nicer outfit for work today: some slim-leg black jeans and a button-down shirt to make up for how terrible he’d looked yesterday. As he dressed, he caught his own eye in the mirror above the dresser and got stuck for a moment looking at himself. It was odd, still feeling like a dumb teenager in his head but seeing the evidence of his age on his body. The wrinkles around his eyes, the streaks of grey in his hair and stubble. He was about the same size as he’d been in high school; not the gangly whelp he’d been back then but still thin, now all wiry muscle built around narrow shoulders and skinny legs.

He had added a lot to his body, mostly in the form of scars, but he still liked the few tattoos he had. The twin black birds on the front of his shoulders, well, those were somewhat unfortunate in hindsight, and he did regret the little emblem on the back of the right shoulder. He craned around to see it in the mirror, the once intricate gears in the joint of the wing now blown out from the scar tissue beneath and blurred with age. But he didn’t regret the bunch of four flowers on his chest, over his heart; that one had hurt the most, and it seemed appropriate to adore and be agonised by something so meaningful. The big white rose, the yellow chrysanthemum, the red rosebud entwined with the orange lily, all surrounded in slim stems of lavender. And of course, the tiny asphodel flower in black ink directly above them all.

He sighed as he looked at that one, delicate little lines that would one day blur into obscurity along with the memories that made it hard to look it. His gaze slid across to the other side of his chest, where the smattering of laceration scars covered his shoulder and collarbone. He remembered how long they’d spent pulling glass out of him and stitching each tiny wound while he’d waited on news from another ward.

He shook that thought off before he could finish it and poked at another scar, the one on his left knuckles where he’d split them open at sixteen. From there his eyes travelled up to the same bicep, and the line of perfectly straight horizontal scars on the inner arm that looked like a train track, the ones he still remembered the pain of. His stomach tightened, and he ran his right hand over them, feeling the bumpy shape of them on his fingertips. The summer of the year he’d turned seventeen had been a very hard one, and he would carry its marks as long as he lived. He still hated himself for how stupid it’d been, and yet, at the time, it had seemed like the only option.

Finally dragging his gaze away from the mirror, he put his shirt on, pulling the short sleeves down as far as they went. He threw his necklace over his head and tucked it under the collar, then laced on his boots and picked up a jacket to hang by the front door for when he left. Despite his distractions, and the lethargy staring at himself had given him, it was only eight, and he felt quite proactive already. He tried to keep it up, and headed right for the fridge to make breakfast.

“Ugh, you’ve gotta be kidding me.” He muttered to himself as he stared disappointedly at the empty shelves. There were three eggs, some ketchup, a nearly-empty jar of pickles, and the kind of tiny sprinkle of cheese that quietly infuriated him. He hadn’t gotten good at grocery shopping for more than one yet, clearly.

There needed to be something for Ruby and Yang to eat for breakfast, so he reluctantly whisked the eggs and some flour and milk into pancake batter for when they were up. In the meantime, he made himself coffee, and went to refill his flask. When he picked it up, he realised it was still half-full from yesterday, shrugged, and stuffed it haphazardly into his jeans pocket. Not eating much yesterday had really made the vodka hit him hard; he wasn’t going to make the same mistake today.

Ruby and Yang both crowed in delight at the sight of him preparing pancakes, though the mood quickly soured when he revealed there was no syrup. Still, Yang made good use of the honey Qrow kept around for when he was sick, and Ruby sliced the last banana on top of hers. Qrow just put a square of butter on his, and smiled to himself as they all ate around the dining table together. This morning, he felt like things were going his way.

“So, are you two walking yourselves to school today?” He asked as he loaded the dishwasher.

“I think so, right?” Ruby looked around from packing her lunch to get confirmation from Yang.

“Yeah, it’s cool. Why, you got somewhere else to be?” Yang teased.

“Yeah, I need to go grocery shopping!” Qrow gestured at the empty fridge. “Do you need anything in particular?”

“Ooh! Cereal!” Ruby cried.

“Again? I bought that box four days ago!”

She looked sheepish. “Uh… Oops?”

Qrow sighed. “I’ll buy another one, but this one has to last at least a week, alright?”

“Okay. I think I can do that.”

“Hmm, I’m not so sure Rubes. I think you’ve got a problem.” Yang prodded her in the side and grabbed her backpack from near her feet. “Could you get some sports drinks for when I start kickboxing? Oh, and are you making dinner today?”

“Yeah, I thought I’d make taco filling and buy some tortillas, you two can just reheat the meat and add whatever you want to them.” Qrow replied.

“Can you make them really hot this time?” Yang asked eagerly.

“Yang, no, I’ll die!” Ruby groaned dramatically.

He chuckled. “I’ll make them medium, but I’ll buy some more of that hot sauce you like.”

“Sweet.”

He saw them out of the apartment, and stood there with the front door open until their footsteps had descended both flights of stairs and the building door had slammed shut. Then he grabbed his jacket and headed out to the parking lot. His truck was one of the worst-looking vehicles out here, but it still worked and it got him around. So what if the previous owner had dinged it up and the paint on the tailgate was rusting? He used it maybe twice a week; it did its job.

He forced himself to take his time in the grocery store, to stop and think about what he needed instead of rushing around like usual. Instead of getting grumpy, he just avoided the people standing in the centre of the aisles with shopping carts, or talking on their phones at full volume. He did cart-surf down an empty aisle to avoid being seen by Kali Belladonna, but only because they’d be absorbed in conversation for twenty minutes if he didn’t. Sweet as she was, he had too much to do.

By the time he reached the registers, Qrow was getting pretty tired of people, but he smiled at the cashier and made polite conversation with them, and tipped the bagger for their work, because that was what you did. All the people who’d come into The Gold Bar on busy nights and order complicated drinks and heavily adjusted food and never tip pissed him off enough that he wouldn’t dream of doing that to someone else.

* * *

 

He took two trips to get all the groceries back up to his apartment, something he wasn’t sure he’d ever done before. He knew what it was like to shop for a family, of course, but it had been so long that he’d forgotten how much _stuff_ there was, and how expensive it got. Especially with two growing kids with appetites as big as Ruby and Yang’s. Still, he reflected, he was happy to feed them: they were like Taiyang, they both found a lot of joy in food, even though it was usually different foods. Tai took a lot of pride in making healthy food taste good, whereas his daughters mostly liked trying every new thing that came their way, especially if it was a baked dessert.

It didn’t take him long to throw together the taco filling, strips of beef and onions with a myriad of seasonings, some inauthentic bell pepper, and enough chilli powder to satisfy Yang without making Ruby’s eyes water. The last time he’d made this for them, when they’d visited for a week over the summer, he’d overdone the heat and had to order pizza, but he thought he was figuring it out now. With the main bulk of it done, he squeezed lime juice over the whole skillet, covered it with aluminium foil, and stuffed it into the now-full fridge. He left the corn tortillas on the counter, and figured they would work out what to do from there.

Satisfied, he looked over the main living area of his apartment, and grimaced. There was clutter everywhere, and he couldn’t even blame his nieces; almost all of it was his. A hoodie that had been lying over the back of the couch for nearly a week, a few scraps of paper on the end table, books on the coffee table he’d gotten out to read and never bothered with. The floor needed vacuuming, most of the surfaces were dusty, and if he was being honest, he really ought to mop. There were still three hours before he needed to leave for his shift, and he sighed. No excuses today.

By the time Qrow finally left the apartment, he was feeling dishevelled and a little tired, although he’d alleviated the latter with a second large coffee and a decent slug of whiskey out of the cabinet. He regretted cleaning in his nice work clothes, but he didn’t think about that sort of thing; looking neat was often the last thing on his mind. Still, he would inevitably end up cleaning the bar or behind it in them too, and he never wore the stupid apron he’d been given for that purpose, he refused to put that ugly gold-embroidered faux-calligraphy lettered thing on. Dirt could be washed out; a dent in his pride was forever.

An greeted him in her usual reserved way: polite, kind but business-like as he got his shit together and took her place as bartender. At 2 pm, service was slowing down from lunch, and he had chance to poke his head into the kitchen and greet Amber and Winter before his first order of the day came in. He stashed his flask under the bar before he foamed the milk for the cappuccino, but left it unopened for now. So far, the whiskey was keeping him going, and he felt in his element.

* * *

 

By four, he’d taken two sips out of the flask and made himself another spiked can, this time with some orange drink that he’d realised too late tasted like cough medicine. He was handing another customer an overpriced gin and tonic when a very tall, familiar presence entered the bar, and he caught sight of a cane swinging. He was wearing a suit again, similar to yesterday, but this time without a waistcoat or tie.

Ozpin smiled as he approached the bar. “Good afternoon, Qrow. A regular hot cocoa, please.”

“Sure thing. That’s three dollars.” Qrow replied, and Ozpin handed him the five dollars he was already holding. “Thanks.” He handed Ozpin his change, and watched as he dropped the two dollar coins into the tip jar again, and sat down in the same seat as yesterday.

Qrow went through the motions: froth the milk, mix in the powder, top up with cold milk, wipe the drips off the mug, turn around with mug in hand. He stopped in his tracks. Ozpin had taken off his glasses again, and was looking up at him. He’d seen his eyes yesterday, but he hadn’t really been _looking_ the way he was today. The irises were the colour of cognac as sunlight shone through it, a clear yellow-gold flecked with darker amber-brown, and there was a glint of lively humour in them even as he sat still and impassive.

Qrow realised how long he’d been standing there with the mug in his hand, and quickly put it down in front of the register for Ozpin to take. Then he turned away, pretending to rearrange the glasses in the dish tray as he flushed hot with embarrassment. He was angry at himself for staring, even angrier that he hadn’t been able to play it off.

“Are you alright, Qrow?” Ozpin asked, and there was genuine concern in his voice.

“I’m fine, thanks.” Qrow replied stiffly, not turning around. “And yourself?”

“I’m very well, thank you.”

Silence fell again, interrupted only by the quiet murmuring of a couple at a booth not far away. Qrow was bemused. He had had a lot of odd customers in his time, it came with the area; a bar like this attracted people from every walk of life. But he’d never met a customer who seemed so determined to make themselves a regular from their very first visit as Ozpin. From asking Qrow’s name the first time they’d met to now making conversation with such casual care, it was almost unsettling. Almost, but not quite.

He wondered if maybe the man was older than he appeared, a lonely widower who just wanted someone to talk to. But then, he still seemed happy with long periods of silence, he didn’t feel the need to speak for the sake of speaking. So maybe he wasn’t trying to be a regular; maybe he was just a very intense person who would disappear like many others did, a few visits to try out the menu before deciding there were better places to go.

Qrow wasn’t sure what he really thought, or whether he’d prefer Ozpin to go away forever or to keep coming back.

He finally turned back to the bar as the red faded out of his face, and reached underneath to take a sip of soda, grimacing as he put it down.

Ozpin’s eyes were on his hand as it rose and fell back to where he couldn’t see it. He picked up his cocoa and drank deeply himself. For a moment, their eyes met over the top of the mug.

“Can I ask you a question?” Qrow finally blurted out.

Ozpin chuckled at his urgent tone, smile crinkling his eyes almost shut. “Of course, although I may not answer.”

“It’s nothing too personal.” He realised he was about to sound stupid and lowered his voice. “Why the hot cocoa?”

His smile faded to something small and a little smug. “Coffee makes me restless, and tea is best when it’s green, which I notice you don’t offer on your menu.” He pointed up at the menu boards above the bar. “Hot cocoa helps me to relax after a long day, that’s all.”

“Oh.” Qrow couldn’t find anything else to say; he wasn’t sure what answer he’d been expecting.

“May I ask you a question in return?”

“Uh… Sure.”

Ozpin lowered his voice even more than Qrow had, leaning over the bar slightly. “Why the alcohol under the bar?”

Qrow felt like someone had punched him in the chest, all the air seeming to dissipate from his lungs. He had to restrain a gasp. Five years behind this particular bar, and if anyone had noticed, they hadn’t said a word. Now he was being… well, he wasn’t sure what Ozpin was doing, whether this was a threat or a tease or just an acknowledgement, but that it had come from someone who had spent less than an hour total in the bar was almost insulting.

“How-”

“You winced when you took a sip.” Ozpin told him.

Qrow nodded, still cagey, but then narrowed his eyes. “But that's because the soda’s bad. Not because of the alcohol.”

“You mean it’s _just_ soda?”

“No, no, there’s vodka in it.” Qrow was whispering now, thankful that the nearby couple were paying no attention to the bar. “But the soda tastes like shit.”

“I see.” Ozpin sipped his cocoa again.

“Right for the wrong reason, Oz.” He brought his voice back up to normal volume, but second-guessed himself again. “Sorry, you mind if I call you Oz?”

“I can assure you, I’ve had worse nicknames. It’s fine.”

“Good. Uh… can I ask you a favour? Don’t pass this on to my boss.”

“I won’t be passing anything on to that woman.” A hint of bitterness entered his voice, though his expression barely changed.

Qrow quirked an eyebrow. “You know Salem?”

“We’re familiar.” Ozpin intoned. “In all honesty, I only came here yesterday to see how she was running the place. But, admittedly, I was surprised at the quality.”

Qrow snorted. “Yeah, well, don’t try the food, then. Anyway, she doesn’t do any of the work. She offloads most of that on me.”

“That does not surprise me at all. But you do a very good job.”

“Oh. Thanks.” He fidgeted with the sleeves of his jacket. “So… this is just between you and me?” He inclined his head at the can and flask below the bar, and Ozpin nodded.

“Yes. And… while I’m not encouraging you, I’d like to stress that I’m not judging you.”

“I appreciate that, but you probably should be.”

Ozpin drained his mug and shook his head as he put it down. “We all make mistakes, Qrow. Goodness knows I’ve made enough of them to know.” He stood up and grabbed his cane from beside him. “Thank you. I’ll see you again.”

“Right.” He couldn’t find any more words, just watched as Ozpin walked out of the door like yesterday, slid his glasses on as he went like yesterday. He didn’t understand anything that had just happened; most of the words that had been said seemed nonsensical now he played them back in his memory. Part of him felt that Ozpin was deliberately obfuscating, smugly enjoying his position of powerful knowledge. Another part said that he was just socially awkward and coming across badly for it. Deep down, he wondered if Ozpin was just another one of those people who used big words and complicated syntax to pretend he was smarter than he was. It didn’t matter.

He’d seen right through Qrow, and Qrow could not see through him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Ozpin's eyes aren't really THAT golden in the show, but honestly I just liked the idea of it. The description of the colour was one of the first things I wrote for this, before there was even an actual story, so I wanted to include it even though it's not accurate.


	4. Self-Deception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow introspects, gets a call home from Tai, and spends some much-needed time with Ruby and Yang. Warnings: Injury description, nightmares.

Tuesday flew by fast and steady despite Qrow’s cautious underuse of his favourite social lubricant. By the time he got home at two thirty on Wednesday morning he was desperate for a drink, torn between booze and sleep. He ate what Ruby and Yang had left of the tacos, drank a few large mouthfuls of whiskey, and brushed his teeth before falling gratefully into bed.

The day had been long, but he was concerned mostly with Ozpin. Something about the man was weird, something about the whole situation was weird. Qrow was not the sort of person that such coincidences happened to for happy reasons. He had pondered the man’s interest in him all day to the point of distraction, and come to the conclusion that he could not have noble intentions. Some people believed in the inherent goodness of humans, but Qrow believed that humans were animals just like everything else.

_Savage, cruel, and self-interested, all of us_ , he thought.

No, Ozpin had to be up to something. The mention of his drink had been a power play. Maybe he was just trying to prove how smart he was; maybe he got off on having the blackmail material. Whatever he wanted, Qrow couldn’t trust him. Strangers weren’t just kind like that unless they wanted something they couldn’t get by legitimate means.

And Qrow needed to get his mind off Ozpin’s hair and his eyes, silver and gold shining in the bar’s dim little globe lights. He needed to not think about how he craved that quiet kindness, those few words of genuine consideration. But he did want to lean into it. It terrified him. He was used to leaning away from anyone he didn’t already love, to let in only those he knew for many years. Even the regulars he liked and got on with, they didn’t know anything about him. Ozpin was the first person he’d even felt conflicted about in years: whether to allow him closer or push him out. But he was inscrutable; he knew the right answer even if he didn’t feel it.

With a burn in his stomach and bright again in his face, he closed his eyes, wishing for dreamless sleep.

* * *

 

_This time he was surrounded by white flowers. He went to pick a bunch but found his right middle finger broken, aching and distorted. He couldn’t hold onto those he managed to grab._

A brief moment of wakefulness, and another blurry memory:

_A strange, triangular craft flying silently over Vale from beach to hills, where he stood looking up at it from between the pines. Ruby grabbed his hand and he found once again that his finger was broken when she screamed and let go._

This time he felt the ache when he woke up too.

_He was barefoot on the black earth of the backyard, hands wrapped in bandages. There was already blood on his shirt. A hand emerged from smoky darkness and the blow connected with his cheekbone. He retaliated, punching wildly until his right hand connected with his unseen opponent’s nose, a dual crunch sounding through the silence and pain flaring in his middle finger._

For the second day in a row, he woke with a start.

He was late up again; it was nearly ten thirty, and Ruby and Yang would already be in their second classes. Qrow didn’t shoot out of bed. Instead, he pressed both his hands to his face and sighed deeply into them. Stress was catching up with him. Denial wasn’t getting him anywhere. And today, he would go and work for twelve hours, and though he couldn’t trust the fascinating stranger that he knew he would meet, he would not talk to him any differently.

* * *

 

Circumstances repeated. They always did. He’d been living the same routine over months and years for his entire life. Get up, do chores, drink a little, go to work, serve customer after customer after customer.

But now, there was a weird moment at 4 pm each day that was different. Ozpin ordered the same regular hot cocoa and put his two dollars change into the tip jar every time, but he himself was never the same. On Wednesday he wore a shirt and tie beneath a shamrock-green sweater, and was as calmly talkative as ever. On Thursday, it was back to the three piece suit, and he didn’t speak much, mostly seeming to look at his own reflection in the contents of his mug. On Friday he perked up a little, asked Qrow about his favourite drinks and spent most of his time sitting at the bar adjusting the long black scarf he was wearing.

It was all worryingly endearing.

* * *

 

Taiyang called on Friday while Qrow was on break, sitting out on the back step watching the sky get dark. He jerked out of his confused stupor and scrambled to answer, a smile spreading across his face when he saw the name onscreen.

“Hey, how’s it going, Tai?” He greeted him.

“Hi Qrow. I didn’t disturb you at work, did I?” Tai’s voice was worried, but there was a familiar cheerful ring to his words.

“Nah, it’s fine. I told you, if I’m working nights I always take my break at eight.”

“I know, I know, I just don’t wanna get you fired or something.”

“It’d take a lot more than a missed call to get me fired, Tai. Don’t worry about it.” He paused, taking a swig from a can of cheap beer he’d paid for from the bar. “Did you talk to Ruby and Yang already?”

Tai snorted, his tone relaxing. “Please, like I’d ever call you before them.” He teased. “Yeah, I talked to them. Did Ruby tell you about this Weiss girl?”

“That the one she ran into in the hall the other day?”

“Yeah. She’s been put in a project group with her now. Apparently they made up, but it sounds kinda like there’s gonna be trouble.”

Qrow sighed. “Great. I’ll talk to her about it tomorrow.” He paused, his eyebrows knitting. “Anyway, why are you acting as go-between for me from China?”

“I don’t know, Qrow. Why am I?” Tai asked accusingly.

There was a long pause. “We don’t get much chance to talk when I’m working, you know.”

This time it was Tai’s turn to sigh, something that crackled down the line until Qrow could almost feel his frustrated helplessness. “Yeah, I… I know. Sorry. I just feel… Well, I feel like a bad parent.”

“Yeah. Me too.” He sipped his beer again. “But listen, they’re fed, they’re clothed, they’re comfortable. Things could definitely be better but they’re not in danger. I would never let that happen and I never will. I give them as much support as I can, I just don’t have a lot of time.”

“I know. I know, I understand. It’s just hard being so far from them. It wasn’t so bad the last two weeks while I was just getting settled, but now school’s started and I’m surrounded by kids all the time… I really miss my girls.”

“They miss you too.”

Tai didn’t reply, and Qrow got the feeling he was too busy collecting himself to speak right away.

“So how is it? The job, Qingdao, how’s it all going?”

“Uh, it’s… Well, it’s something.” Tai began thickly, and sniffed hard. “I mean, the school’s alright, the kids are _great_ , most of them are so eager to learn. Even the couple troublemakers aren’t as bad as they were at Signal. Qingdao’s… it’s fine. The air quality isn’t great, it’s smoggy most days. The school’s put me up in a decent apartment, but… I forgot how much I hate big cities, you know?” He laughed quietly.

“I know what you mean. You never could stand Portland.” Qrow smiled.

“Yeah, that’s at least half the reason I dropped out of college the first time. And Qingdao’s ten times the size.” He paused. “I’m sure I’ll get used to it, but for now it’s kind of a struggle. I’ve only been working a week and I feel kinda burned out already. Maybe this whole thing was a big mistake.”

“Tai, you know it’s your anxiety saying that, not you.” Qrow assured him. He wished he could put a hand on his friend’s shoulder and tell him everything was alright. “Remember when this opportunity came up? Why did you wanna do it?”

“To help.” Tai answered immediately. “But-”

“And that’s what you’re doing. You put the needs of those kids, and the other teachers, before your own, even though you knew it would be hard. That’s the kind of person you are. I know that you’d regret it if you quit.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right. But am I really helping if I’m not at the top of my game?”

“No new teacher gets to the top of their game right away, right? You need to give it time. Besides, you’re there, aren’t you? That’s more than most people can say.”

Tai chuckled. “Yeah, I guess it is. Thanks.”

When Qrow finally hung up, his break was almost over. He watched the low moon appearing and disappearing behind fast-moving clouds and wondered what Tai could see out of his window across the Pacific. It would be around noon there, but maybe the sun would be invisible behind the smog. Qrow thought that Tai sounded tired, and not fulfilled-tired, ragged-tired. He didn’t know what Qingdao was like himself, had no idea how Chinese society differed from American society, but he knew it was bringing Tai down. And he also knew that if Tai quit it’d hang over him the rest of his life. He was often scared, usually for his family and friends, but he was no coward. Qrow just hoped he could find a balance.

* * *

 

Saturday rolled around, and he was glad to be able to spend some time with his nieces before work. When he got up at ten, he almost ran into Ruby in the hallway, wearing one of Yang’s sweaters over her cotton pyjamas.

She yawned and brushed her hair back off her face. “Morning, Uncle Qrow.”

“Hey. You’re usually up earlier than this, what happened?”

“I didn’t go to bed until I heard you come home, and then I couldn’t get to sleep because I was thinking about this stupid group project I have to do with Weiss. Wait, did I tell you about that?”

“Your dad told me you got put in a group with her.”

“Yeah, well we have to put together this presentation and show the rest of the class and I’m kinda terrified I’m gonna mess it up and she’s gonna hate me forever.”

“Okay, okay, don’t get worked up about it. Let’s get breakfast and you can explain.”

Yang was sitting cross-legged on the couch when they entered the living area, eating from a plate of sliced fruit on her lap and watching a cartoon. Ruby sat down at the dining table and explained what was going on at school while Qrow made them both omelettes. She told him about Weiss’s unsatisfying apology and forced friendliness, the group project about personal experiences that Ruby was sure she’d fail. She was desperate to befriend Weiss but couldn’t quite figure out how to impress someone with such high standards. Weiss was rich, Ruby clarified; her dad was a school governor, and Weiss only received the best, and was expected to give her best in return.

A failure would reflect poorly on them both.

Yang chimed in with advice, which boiled to down to making sure she knew if Weiss was rude again, so that she could get her back. Qrow didn’t miss the implication, and gave her a sharp look over the kitchen counter. But he didn’t have anything better himself, and settled for telling Ruby to talk to her teachers if something went wrong. They would know better than he did, they got paid to deal with teenagers all day. Qrow had only been at it part-time for three weeks and still wasn’t sure he was doing it right.

When breakfast was done and they were all dressed, they took the dirty laundry down to the communal basement to wash it. The girls had only done one load since arriving here, and were swiftly running out of clothes entirely. Qrow only had a couple of clean sweaters and jackets left. In another town it might not have mattered, but it got windy here by the coast. Besides, it paid to be smart behind the bar: looking better meant better tips. And on Saturdays, there was a high chance of professional complainer Cinder dropping in, and a non-zero possibility of Salem appearing. If either of them saw him looking how he had on Monday, he’d probably be written up.

While the clothes spun downstairs, Qrow made up dinner for that night, assembling lasagne for Ruby and Yang to put into the oven when they wanted it. He made it in the biggest possible dish, hoping that there would be leftovers for tomorrow as well. Sundays were his only days off most weeks, and he liked them to be as low-effort as possible. If it meant he didn’t have to cook while hungover, the extra energy while he wasn’t was worth it. He was covering the dish with foil when Ruby and Yang came back into the living area. Yang pushed Ruby forward towards him a little.

“Um, Uncle Qrow?” She said awkwardly, twisting her fingers together.

Qrow took in her nervous presence and Yang’s hopeful grin behind her, and couldn’t restrain a smirk. “Yeah?”

“Um, we got invited to this thing tonight, and we wanted to ask if we could go?”

“What kind of thing is it?”

“It’s… just a little get-together, right?” She turned to Yang, who nodded vehemently. “Down at someone’s house near the beach.”

“Whose house?”

“My friend Sun’s.” Yang replied. “And before you ask, it’s not a party, there’s gonna be like eight of us.”

“Right. Is there gonna be alcohol?”

Yang grimaced like she had been dreading the question. “I genuinely don’t know.”

Qrow sighed. On the one hand, Tai would never have said yes, especially not when the girls wanted to hang out with people they’d barely known a week. On the other, it was important they built a social circle here, that they felt welcome and comfortable. And if there was alcohol… well, Qrow didn’t have room to criticise, did he?

“Alright, fine.” He finally said. “When are you going over there, is someone picking you up? When are you coming home?”

“Sun said he’d meet us at the boardwalk and take us back there.” Ruby piped up. “At like seven? And... Well, he didn’t say when we’d be coming home.”

“Okay. I’d feel better about it if you got home by midnight, and I’d feel even better than that if his parents gave you a ride. But if you have to walk home, stick together.”

“We will.”

“If you get in trouble you can always come to the bar.”

“What kinda trouble are we gonna run into here?” Yang asked, almost laughing. “This place is almost as quiet as Patch.”

“You’re not wrong.” Qrow grumbled. “Look, you two are plenty mature enough to figure out what you need to do. Just text me when you get back so I don’t worry myself sick and your dad doesn’t fly home from China to kill me.”

Ruby laughed. “We’ll be fine.”

Qrow forced himself to believe that.

* * *

 

With dinner and the laundry done, he haphazardly ironed a white shirt and went to change into it, finishing the outfit with a thin shawl-collared cardigan. Its tight cuffs made his wrists look unpleasantly skinny, but the two-tone greys were smart: it was the one item of clothing he owned that had ever been complimented by customers. He checked his hair, refilled his flask with vodka, and shouted goodbye to the girls. Then he set off for what was likely to be a long and busy day behind the bar.

An looked relieved when he arrived a little before two; she always did on Saturdays, and Qrow knew she was looking forward to going home and seeing her son. The few times she took night shift on Saturdays she would still look tired the following Monday. It was the busiest night of the week, and although they didn’t often run into problems, there was a higher percentage of rowdy customers than usual. Qrow found it much easier to raise his voice and tell them to quiet down or get out than An, whom he was pretty sure had never yelled in her life.

He settled back into the routine quickly, taking regular drinks and chasing them with whatever he found nearby. By four he was unhappily following swigs of vodka with a warm light beer someone had ordered, paid for, and abandoned on the bar without taking a sip. He was getting more jittery by the second, unable to stand still even during moments of downtime and unable to figure out why. Sure, he was worried about the girls, how could he not be? Maybe it was that, maybe he was concerned about them getting drunk for the first time or how they would get home, maybe. But as four-thirty ticked by, his mind started wandering, some unnamed itch suddenly making itself a focus.

He slumped, his shoulders dropping as he bowed his head and squeezed his eyes shut in… what? Anger at himself? Frustration that he was letting this happen again? Fear? He couldn’t name the feeling, but it flared up in his stomach like a roaring beast, a hunger that couldn’t be quelled. Why had he been so desperate to see Ozpin again? Why had he been expecting it, imagining the conversation they would have and the way he would smile? He bit down on the inside of his lip so hard he drew blood. Denial, once again, was not working.

It never did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate title for this chapter: Qrow pretends to have his shit together for his family's sake.


	5. Aventurine and Citrine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow has more than one familiar customer at the bar, and things go from bad to worse. Warnings: violence, graphic injury description

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't really know what to say about this chapter. I had a lot of fun writing it though, and I hope you enjoy reading it!

Qrow worked through his chagrin, forced himself to focus on each customer as they came, from the pair of smiling teenage girls who held hands as they ordered milkshakes to the heavy resentful presence of Marcus Black, who parked himself in the side room and would stay there until close. Slowly, it started to come easier as he distracted himself, though he knew it was more to do with how much he was drinking than his own fortitude. He had finished his beer, and spiked an energy drink, grimacing with every sip the way he had with the orange soda the other day; it tasted vile. But that memory brought him back to thinking about Ozpin, so he finished the can as soon as possible and moved onto the next.

It was almost seven when he appeared, and Qrow’s eyes widened over the beer he was pouring. He almost overflowed the glass before he remembered where he was, apologising to the customer and handing it over. He tried to act like Oz was any other patron, but staying casual was difficult and he couldn’t take the smile off his face.

He was dressed much more casually today, having forgone his various suits and stiff-collared shirts for a charcoal-coloured sweater, jeans, and a short green scarf tied into a triangle at his throat. Pinned to the centre of the scarf was a brooch, a heavy silver cross with a dark stone in the centre. Qrow’s fingers went unconsciously to his own neck, touching the spot on his shirt under which the off-kilter crucifix he wore brushed his sternum. It was an unusual similarity to notice: there were a lot of Christians in the world, although Qrow was not one and had never been one. But maybe Ozpin was, or maybe, like Qrow, he just appreciated the aesthetics of the whole thing.

“Hey.” He said, still smiling. “Little later than usual, isn’t it?”

Ozpin smirked back and sat down, leaning his cane against the counter and taking off his glasses. “My routine changes at the weekend. Doesn’t yours?”

Qrow snorted. “Not much. The usual?”

“Please.” Ozpin held out five dollars, which Qrow quickly took to the register, handing back the change for Oz to drop into the tip jar. “I didn’t think I’d be able to order ‘the usual’ quite so soon.”

“Well, don’t take this the wrong way, but it kinda seems like you wanted that all along.” He turned away to make the hot cocoa.

Ozpin hummed thoughtfully. “I do appreciate the feeling of being known, even for such a small thing.”

_You’ve certainly made yourself known_ , Qrow thought.

He stirred the drink thoroughly, slopping milk onto the countertop and cursing under his breath. He was drunker than he’d thought, and unreasonably anxious to go with it. Fumbling, he wiped off the mug, and handed it over before going back to clean the counter.

“Thank you.” Oz wrapped his hands around the mug like he was trying to warm them, despite the air in the bar already being thick with heat. “How has your day been so far?”

Qrow surfaced from mopping the shelves, which milk had dribbled down. His head spun slightly. “Not so bad. Busy. You?”

“Very good, thank you. Quiet, mostly.”

They lapsed into silence again as Qrow put down the rag he was using and served another customer a margarita. He was garnishing the glass with lime when he spotted a familiar and terrible face over the woman’s shoulder. Trying not to grimace, he handed it over, then turned back to Ozpin.

“This might be bad.” He muttered.

“Why?” Ozpin turned and followed his gaze. “Oh.”

Evidently Oz was as familiar with Cinder as he was with Salem, because his face fell into a disapproving frown as she entered, two men walking side-by-side behind her. They turned off to sit down in the front booth by the window as Cinder slowly strutted up to the bar.

“Good evening.” She smiled sarcastically at Qrow.

“What do you want?” He replied, unable to summon any hospitality for her.

Cinder raised an eyebrow, but didn’t drop her smile. “A Long Island Iced Tea. And two bourbon and cokes.”

Qrow nodded sharply and took the cash she waved at him. When he handed over her change, she dropped it back into her handbag, then leaned one elbow on the bar as she watched him work. It was the laid-back superior attitude that pissed him off more than her outright rudeness. It seemed to be annoying Ozpin too, as he glanced at her sideways through narrowed eyes. Qrow wondered how Oz knew her, but focused on the drinks; if they weren’t perfect, he would have trouble on his hands.

The Long Island Iced Tea took him longer than usual to make; his hands were shaking. Once he finished and handed it over, Cinder sipped it while watching impassively as he poured the simpler drinks, presumably for her companions. He gave her a tray to carry them, and she didn’t thank him as she walked away, just smirked a little wider.

Qrow sighed and slumped over again once she was no longer in earshot. “God, I hate her.” He said quietly.

Oz didn’t reply, just shook his head and sipped his cocoa.

“’Scuse me.” Qrow reached down behind the bar for his flask, turning away to take a large swig of vodka. He didn’t have anything to chase it, so just waited as the burn travelled down his throat into his stomach. When he put the flask back Ozpin was eyeing him carefully.

“Are you drunk?” He asked, voice so low Qrow could barely hear him.

He nodded, barely perceptibly.

“I see.” His expression was unreadable, but he looked down and away.

Hot shame flooded down Qrow’s back, an uncomfortable prickling feeling left behind in its wake. It seemed like Ozpin was disappointed in him, like a parent who knew you could do better, a teacher who knew you didn’t try. It made him feel small and stupid, and a little angry.

“I thought you said you weren’t judging me?” He growled quietly.

“I’m not.” Ozpin sighed. “Just concerned.”

“Well, join the club. But there’s worse things I could be into.”

“Who are you trying to convince?”

Qrow gritted his teeth at that, the words reflected ten times louder in his head. But all the fight had gone out of him, and he had nothing to say. This was not the first time he had thrown away someone’s care for him. He didn’t feel guilty; he thought he would in the morning, but right now he would rather just be somewhere else, to brush his problems away like errant hairs until another day. Besides, however much he was beginning to enjoy Ozpin’s company, that didn’t give him the right to intrude. And deep down, he still wasn’t sure the man actually had his best interests at heart. There had to be a reason he knew Cinder and Salem, and he doubted it was good.

* * *

 

Ozpin didn’t leave until Qrow went on his break at eight, Amber taking his place as bartender for a half-hour. As Qrow stood outside the back door with another beer and a sandwich from the kitchen, his eyes were glazed, barely seeing the litter-strewn parking lot. Guilt was setting in faster than he’d expected; the steely look in Ozpin’s eyes as he’d left the bar had been enough to ensure that. He wasn’t certain that he was the only reason for it, though; Oz had shot Cinder’s rowdy table a nasty glare as he’d passed. Maybe there was more history there than he knew. It wasn’t really his business.

He finished eating and drained the beer quickly, finishing his break early. Amber hated tending bar, and Saturday nights were busy enough to put her off her game. When he went in to relieve her, there was someone standing at the bar.

“Here he is, you can talk to him about it.” Amber said sharply to the customer, gesturing at Qrow. Then she turned to him and murmured: “He wants something off-menu.”

Qrow looked the man over as Amber left, recognising him as one of those Cinder had walked in with. He was tall and slim, his lithe form barely hidden by the shirt he was wearing unbuttoned to his mid-sternum. His long dark hair was tied into a braid that swung when he tossed his head, standing with one hand on his hip and a grin that seemed to reach from ear to ear. His hooded eyes were almost the same shade as Ozpin’s, a pretty golden-amber. But while Oz’s eyes reminded Qrow of something liquid, this man’s eyes were hard and solid, little citrine stones.

Qrow realised, with an awkward shiver, that the man would almost have been attractive, had his expression not looked so manic. He forced himself to be at least somewhat welcoming.

“What can I get you?”

“I was wondering if you could make me something special.” The man purred. His voice was soft, but there was an edge to it.

“I don’t usually do anything off-menu, but I’ll consider it. What do you want?”

“I’m sure an experienced bartender like you knows the pisco sour?”

Qrow sighed. “Yeah, I know of it, but we don’t carry pisco and I don’t have access to egg white.”

The man’s smile faded. “You don’t carry it?”

“It doesn’t sell well, it’s not worth it.”

“Because, of course, popular tastes are the only ones worth catering to.” His tone was scathingly sarcastic, his mouth twisting into a sneer.

“Look, I don’t run this place, that isn’t my decision to make. Choose something from the menu, and I can guarantee you I’ll have everything I need.”

“Oh, is that so?” The man’s voice rose, becoming harsh and cold as he pressed his hands to the bar top and leaned in. “You’re not just an arrogant asshole who thinks he’s too good for people who know what they want?”

Qrow saw red. “Listen, pal-”

“Tyrian!” Cinder’s voice was recognisable, sharp across the room and drawing collective attention. She was standing at her table, expression outraged. The tall, moustached man sitting next to her had one hand pressed to his face in frustration.

The man at the bar looked between her and Qrow for a moment, before straightening up, his voice lightening. “In that case, I’ll have a daiquiri. And a bourbon and cola, and a dirty martini.”

Qrow made Tyrian fetch the tray from their table to take the drinks back, mostly so he didn’t have to feel him gawking as he made them. He stared anyway when he returned, and Qrow looked up to see him licking his lips, eyes narrowed. His heart was pumping hard by the time Tyrian sat back down, although he was somewhat relieved to see both Cinder and the other man at the table quietly lay into him. They didn’t seem to like him any more than Qrow did.

Tyrian sat with his feet up on the bench, crouching in his seat with his elbows on his knees. This was odd enough alone, but the fact that it put him higher than the surrounding customers meant that he had a clear line of sight to the bar. Several times, Qrow looked up from pouring a drink to find those sharp eyes on him, a grin that promised trouble on his lips. He had to restrain a shudder each time; there was something dreadfully wrong about that smile. Something inhuman, like he was just trying on a mask.

The table ordered several more drinks over the course of the night, though thankfully it was only Cinder and the other man who came to the bar. Qrow was glad to see them all leave at around midnight, and smirked at the sight of Cinder tottering on her stiletto heels. Service slowed slightly, and with them gone he felt relaxed enough to check his phone between orders, waiting for Ruby or Yang to text him. He had finished his flask of vodka and had started on yet another beer, feeling the world blurring in a comfortable way. He was worried about his nieces, but it felt far away, like he was not quite himself and for now, it was someone else’s problem.

By one, though, real anxiety had started to form in his gut, his silent phone seeming like the loudest thing in the room. He messaged Yang first, then Ruby, a quick ‘where are you’, hoping they’d just gone home to bed and forgotten about him. If he got back to the apartment and they still weren’t there, he’d go looking for them, kick up whatever fuss he had to in order to find them. But he was thinking too far ahead, he knew, he needed to give them time. He was getting distracted and jumpy.

He still hadn’t heard from them when he closed the bar, and fear was sobering him up as he hurriedly mopped the counter, tallied up the register, and divided up the contents of the tip jar into bags for his colleagues to collect in the morning. God, he wanted to get back and find his nieces in bed safe, he should have talked to this Sun kid’s parents and made them bring them home, something. He was being irrational, mad at himself and mad at them for not doing what they’d said they would do. If anything had happened Tai wouldn’t get chance to kill him because Qrow would throw himself off the boardwalk and into the Pacific.

As he let himself out and locked the back door of the bar, fumbling with the keys, there came a quiet cough from behind him. He jumped, spinning around with his fists up. There was a grating, hysterical laugh.

“Qrow Branwen.” The voice was soft, with a sharp edge. Tyrian emerged from the shadows at the edge of the parking lot, by the wall that backed onto the strip mall. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

“What the fuck do you want?” Qrow spat, no longer attempting to restrain himself.

Tyrian pressed a hand to his chest, mouth opening in a dramatic ‘O’. “How rude!” He exclaimed. “I was just trying to introduce myself. My name is Tyrian.”

“I’ve gathered. What do you want?” Qrow was shivering in his thin sweater, the breeze seeming to blow right through him.

“Oh, of course. We’re already acquainted.” He smiled again, determined and emotionless. “But you probably don’t know that I’m not the sort of person you should offend so easily.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Qrow shouted in vain.

There was a moment’s silence, and Tyrian turned slightly. Footsteps could be heard in the alleyway that connected the parking lot to the front sidewalk. He looked back at Qrow and smirked as voices drew closer.

Ruby and Yang rounded the corner, both dressed for a hot day and shivering in the chilly night air. An expression of confusion crossed both of their faces.

“Uncle Qrow?” Yang said uncertainly.

“Stop!” He held out a hand to them: Tyrian was facing them now, his expression hungry. “Just stay back.”

“What’s going on?” Ruby asked. “We lost track of time and wanted to come find you so we could walk home together.”

Tyrian was smiling now, legs slightly bent like a cat preparing to pounce on its prey.

Qrow moved before he could, running and leaping to tackle him to the ground as one of the girls screamed. “Go!” He yelled at them. “Get out of here, call the cops!”

Tyrian elbowed him in the face, knocking him back, and sprung up as two pairs of footsteps pounded towards safety. He chuckled, a childish, humming sound, and went to kick him in the ribs, but Qrow rolled away.

He managed to scramble to his feet and dodged an incoming punch, coming up with his own right hook that just skimmed the top of Tyrian’s head as he ducked. He tried again, aiming for his gut this time, but Tyrian side-stepped and spun around to get behind him. The next thing he knew he was being pulled down by the back of his cardigan, and he struggled to free his arms and get away.

Tyrian cackled loudly as he threw away Qrow’s jacket, barely seeming to have broken a sweat. He looked down his nose at Qrow, who was panting more from adrenaline than exertion. “It’s almost an honour to be fought so hard.” He crooned. “But your nieces will be back before long. And I’m sure they can’t fight the way you can.”

Qrow looked up, seeing Tyrian’s face in a blur that wouldn’t resolve. He snarled. “This fight will be over before they get back.” He straightened up and charged, Tyrian lazily moving out of his way and tripping him into the paving.

“You’re making this very difficult for yourself.” The harsh tone had returned to his voice. “There are a lot of idiots like you in the world. So _desperate_ to protect what you love, when you could protect yourself and just _stay down_!”

As he was orating, Qrow fumbled around the concrete where he lay, up against the curb where he’d seen an abandoned beer bottle whilst on his break earlier. He grabbed it clumsily and stood up, left knee now aching.

Tyrian’s eyes went right to the improvised weapon, and he chuckled. Before Qrow could move, Tyrian had grabbed his right wrist tightly and painfully, dragged him forward until he’d dropped the bottle, and jammed an elbow into his left shoulder. Qrow cried out and dropped to his knees as Tyrian kicked the still-intact bottle back towards the wall of the bar, the rolling sound it made echoing over the empty parking lot.

Something appeared in Tyrian’s hand as if he’d pulled it out of nowhere; Qrow was struggling to follow his movements now, his head spinning violently. When he focused, he realised that Tyrian was twirling a knife in his right hand, grinning.

“If we’re fighting dirty…” The suggestion was left unfinished, but Qrow knew what it meant. He was losing, and the lives of both him and his nieces were in danger.

He wrenched his wrist away and scrambled to his feet again, wincing as his knee sent a wave of pain down his leg. Sirens were approaching in the distance, and he hoped to god they were for him, that someone would come and interrupt this madman before someone got seriously hurt. For now, all he could do was fight.

Tyrian charged at him, knife held aloft, but fell for his feint and placed himself perfectly in the way for Qrow to punch him in the nose. He bellowed in pain and anger, pausing with his hands over his face until Qrow stepped forward and punched him again, this time catching his left cheekbone satisfyingly with a ring. Tyrian lunged forwards, ducking another fist, and returned a blow of his own to Qrow’s jaw. Qrow kicked him, foot connecting hard with his stomach and sending him flying to the ground.

Gasping, Tyrian stood up, knife outstretched and eyes wide and manic; god, why were the whites of his eyes so visible?

Qrow ducked the first swipe and went in for another right hook, and then pain incomparable to anything he’d felt before exploded in his abdomen. All the air in his lungs seemed to be sucked out, and for a moment he was frozen in time, staring at Tyrian as he giggled like a child. Slowly, he looked down at himself, and saw a tear in his white shirt under his ribs on his right side. Blood was leaching from beneath it at a sickening rate, the stain spreading rapidly.

He fell to his knees, grasping the wound with both shaking hands, his breath coming in shallow pants. There were footsteps, but they were retreating, not approaching, and when he looked up it was to see Tyrian climbing over the wall and disappearing out of sight. The pain was unreal, sharp and burning through his body like fire, and he didn’t know blood ran that fast. His hands were soaked in it now, and when he lifted them to see the wound he was trembling like he’d been drenched in ice water.

The cut was long and deep; he could see layers of fatty tissue under the torn skin. He tried to pinch the edges together, but the pain made him growl as he saw stars. He pressed his hands to it again, bowing over like it would help. This was it: there was nothing in the world but him, this parking lot, this pain and blood. He was going to die in the backlot of his bar because he hadn’t been able to make a drink. It was almost laughable. He hoped that at least Tyrian was satisfied, and wouldn’t go after Ruby or Yang now he had Qrow’s blood on his hands.

The sirens were drawing closer. What was going to happen to the girls when he died? He supposed Tai would have to come home to take care of them. Qrow felt guilty, in a distant way; it wasn’t fair to them. To any of them. For Ruby and Yang to lose another parental figure, even a mediocre one. And for Tai to lose another opportunity, and yet another friend, someone he used to love torn away by a cruel uncaring world.

No, that was not good enough.

Summoning his last ounce of energy, Qrow dragged himself up from the ground, emitting a choked howl at the pain in his side. He kept his left hand pinned to the wound and used his right to support himself against the wall of the bar as he stumbled down the alleyway towards the sidewalk. If he was going to die, it wasn’t going to be alone where no one could see him. He emerged onto the street, and realised that the sirens had gotten incredibly loud.

He looked up, blinded by blue light, and collapsed on the sidewalk.


	6. Two Kinds of Trauma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow relives some old trauma and reflects on the new. Warnings: Child abuse, violence, implied homophobia, character death/grieving, nightmares/flashbacks, injury description, medical description

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, that cliff-hanger last chapter, huh? Anyway, there's a lot of medical stuff in this chapter and I did what research I could but there might be inconsistencies, so apologies for that. Also, no Ozpin again, because Qrow has... other priorities right now.

_She was doing it again. Raven was holding him on the ground from in front, both knees on his outstretched arms and hands on the back of his neck. Her nails were digging in, and he could smell the mildew in the carpet as he sobbed into it. Their mother was standing just beside his legs, removing her belt; he could only hear her. She was muttering to herself, words like ‘pathetic’ and ‘disgusting’ and ‘wrong’ between slurs and epithets. It was her favourite belt, the one with the studs in decorative flower patterns and the metal end tip._

_He didn’t know that from hearing it, but he did as soon as it hit him._

_He screamed into the rug, Raven’s hands tightened on his neck, and the belt hit him again, and again, and again. Hot blood ran from several welts on his back, the one on his right shoulder burning with a pain that went deeper than anything he’d ever felt before. He was begging now, desperate to make it stop, and she forced him to promise that he was different now, that this had changed him. Frantic, he lied, he swore on his life, and he noticed that at his head, Raven was quietly crying too._

_He expected to be let up, but this time he was turned over, something covering his head. No one was holding him down but there was a small, sweaty hand in his as the belt descended, striking him just below his ribs on the right side._

* * *

 

He was lying down but moving, the whole narrow room shaking. Two strangers in uniform were touching him, one holding something to his ribs while the other did something to his upper arm. Qrow tried to shy away but didn’t have the strength to move much.

“He’s waking up!” A familiar voice cried in his ear.

He looked over to see Ruby beside him, her face swimming in and out of focus. She was holding his bloodied hand tightly.

Qrow fidgeted, moving despite both paramedics telling him not to, because some instinct in his head demanded he should. His vision was swimming and he couldn’t quite remember how he got here. He wanted to get up and run, but adrenaline only managed to force him into a sitting position before someone murmured the word ‘sedation’ and he was back on the gurney, eyes closing.

* * *

 

_It was mid-winter. The funeral had ended, and Tai had taken the kids upstairs to change out of their stiff black dresses into something warm. Ruby wanted to go outside and play in the snow, she was too young to understand the pain in the air. Qrow almost admired that. He wandered into the kitchen, still limping slightly on his left leg, each step radiating pain through his knee where it had been twisted in the wrong direction._

_But he had been lucky._

_He made two coffees for himself and Tai and two hot cocoas for the girls, adding lots of cold milk so they’d be cool enough to drink by the time they came downstairs. He left his coffee black and took it with him as he stepped outside, dress pants immediately soaked at the hem by the snow. Without his jacket, he shivered, the freezing wind chilling him to the bone. His throat was sore as he walked aimlessly around the house perimeter; tears that had fallen, and those that wanted to, had left it raw. He couldn’t stop thinking about her._

_He would never come over and find her and Tai cuddling on the couch again, never hear her singing to Ruby or telling stories to Yang. She’d never buy flowers just for the sake of it or look for any excuse to slow-dance. Qrow had long ago accepted that he’d never kiss her again, but that Tai wouldn’t either was too much. The universe had made a mistake, it had to have, there’d been some divine clerical error and it was meant to be him, and Summer should have been the one with the badly sprained knee and the lucky break._

_She’d never again wake up late in the morning, or look out of the window, or wear her favourite clothes. She’d never leave hair in the shower or call Qrow after a few drinks to shoot the shit at 2 am. She’d never fight for her beliefs or draw on restaurant napkins or take terrible pictures of the kids again. She was gone, all that remained of her a few photos, a decaying casket, and memories in the minds of those she’d loved._

_Qrow began to cry again, bowing his head over his coffee mug and gritting his teeth, trying not to let any sound escape. He kept his head turned away from the windows in case Tai or the girls saw him, and walked around to the corner of the house to look out at the sparse forest around it._

_And then the wind was knocked out of him. There was a burning pain in his ribs on his right side, and blood in the snow as he fell to his knees._

* * *

 

The room was hot and too bright, the light yellow as he squinted up at it. Soft voices mumbled nearby. He fell asleep again.

_A knife coming out of the darkness, disembodied and reaching. All the air gone from his lungs, blood on his hands, pain that encompassed everything._

* * *

 

The lights were even brighter, the noise of several televisions talking over one another accompanied by loud voices coming from nearby. Beneath it all, he could hear someone crying, softly, like they didn’t want to be noticed. He barely opened his eyes before going under again.

_A knife coming out of the darkness, disembodied and reaching. All the air gone from his lungs, blood on his hands, pain that encompassed everything._

* * *

 

He was surprised to surface this time, gasping and then wincing as the pain got worse. His eyelids were heavy, and he blinked slowly as he got used to the light again. It was quieter now, though not silent; he could still hear a television nearby, and voices a little further away. His head felt foggy, but he didn’t feel like he was drowning in it anymore. It was a lot like waking up from a good night’s sleep after being awake for too long.

As well as the agony in his side, there was an ache in his jaw, a throbbing discomfort in his right middle finger like the knuckle needed to be cracked, and a sharp pain in his shoulder where he’d been elbowed. The details of the fight were starting to come back to him, the details of _Tyrian,_ and that ugly, manic grin. A chill ran down his spine, and he groaned.

“Uncle Qrow?” Yang’s worried voice was loud beside him, and her face suddenly appeared in his vision from the left. She smiled widely when he looked up at her. “You’re awake.”

“Should I get the nurse?” Ruby asked desperately from his right, sounding small and scared. He noticed she was still holding his hand.

“Just press the call button.” Yang directed.

Qrow summoned the energy to turn his head and look at Ruby. She seemed to be on the verge of tears, her smile forced and tremulous, but she squeezed his hand.

“Hey.” He said quietly, and his voice rasped harshly. “How long have I been out?”

“Well, you got here at about three this morning.” Yang replied. “And it’s now… nearly noon. So you've been asleep for nine hours.”

“Hm. Could be worse.”

“Yeah.” Yang nodded. “We’re just glad you’re okay.”

“Should we… warn him?” Ruby’s voice was strained.

“Warn me? About what?” Qrow’s hackles raised, but when he tried to sit up, pain shot through his abdomen.

“Keep still!” Yang cried, frustrated and anxious, and pressed her hands to Qrow’s shoulders. Then she sighed. “The cops have been waiting for you to wake up so they can question you. They’ve already talked to us, but we didn’t see enough to be helpful. So they’re gonna be all over you.”

“Great.” He sighed, and opened his mouth to continue, but was interrupted by the curtains around the bed swishing aside.

A nurse walked into the little enclosed space, and as she shut the curtains again Qrow could see the two cops standing outside. Waiting for him to be deemed okay before they cross-examined him, no doubt. He mulled on it sullenly as the nurse ordered Ruby and Yang back to the waiting room and started checking his charts. He wanted this Tyrian guy to get caught, of course, more for the safety of the girls than his own. But right this minute, he wanted nothing more than to be left in peace with his family. After such a near miss, justice was the last thing on his mind.

The nurse prodded him a bit, checked his temperature and pulse rate, and looked at the IV bag hanging at the bedside. He noticed the cannula in his left hand for the first time, and flexed his fingers slightly to watch the needle twitch as clear fluid slowly entered his veins. The nurse explained what had happened to him between the fight and his waking up: the ambulance, the sedation, the severe loss of his thinned blood due to the alcohol in his system. He had been given two layers of stitches; one set of soluble sutures to repair the hole in his abdominal wall, and the standard ones on top to stop him bleeding out. He’d also been given a blood transfusion and two bags of fluids to stop him dying of circulatory shock.

Qrow mostly nodded as she described how close he’d been to death as though it was just another day, which for her it probably was. But as he clenched and unclenched his left hand, watching the cannula move, a cold sort of terror leaked down his spine. Not fear of what was to come, but of what could have been: Of his nieces waiting for answers and never getting any, of Tai’s grief overwhelming him like a tsunami, of Raven coming back onto the scene out of necessity. He had teetered on the edge of disaster for the whole family because The Gold Bar didn’t stock an obscure variety of liquor. The ridiculousness of the situation did not escape him.

The nurse adjusted his bed so that he could sit mostly upright, then asked his permission to let in the police officers. He nodded again, and she bustled them in, then left to deal with another patient. They were there a long time, asking questions, eyeing him like he was lying most of the time. Qrow gave them as thorough a description of Tyrian as he could, finding that some of the details had faded from his memory. He had to tell them the truth when they asked if he had been intoxicated: he was sure the blood test that had been done could tell them anyway. By the time they were satisfied with his answers and left, he felt degraded and ashamed. They were clearly treating this as a mutual drunken brawl, rather than a grown man threatening two teenagers and their guardian stepping in.

Ruby and Yang came back to his bedside not long after the cops had left, carrying snacks and drinks from the vending machine. Qrow was about to complain about how hungry he suddenly felt, when a porter followed them in with a meal tray for him. For a while, they sat silently and ate together. Qrow stole a chip from Ruby and chuckled at her outraged response, thankful that he was here to see it.

They chatted for a while afterwards, Yang regaling him with stories of their night at Sun’s place, how Ruby had tried beer for the first time and decided she hated it. Yang herself had been given a frozen cocktail and decided that was all she ever wanted to drink for the rest of her life. Qrow spent most of the story with his free hand over his eyes, trying not to think about what Tai would say if he could hear this. But he couldn’t bring himself to be mad at them, not even for leaving so late: after all, that had been the only reason he hadn’t bled out in the backlot.

Eventually, another nurse came and checked his vitals again, unplugged the IV from the cannula in his hand and replaced the needle with a Band-Aid. A doctor followed them, shooing Ruby and Yang out in a tactless manner that made Qrow scowl and then checking on his injury. He removed the dressing from the wound on his side and inspected it closely, letting Qrow finally get a glimpse of it himself. The first thing that struck him was how straight the line was, and how neat and tightly packed the stitches were. He counted twenty, though he knew there were more underneath. The surrounding area was sore, the skin pulled tight around the sutures, but every trace of blood had been wiped away.

The doctor applied another dressing, scrawled something on his chart, and disappeared. Before long he was replaced by yet another nurse. She informed him that he was being discharged, his clothes were in a bag in the closet, and he needed to check out at the nurses’ desk, then go down to the dispensary on the second floor before he left to collect his medication. Her brusque attitude threw him off, and he snorted to himself as she flicked the curtains closed forcefully. He supposed it wasn’t surprising that they wanted him out of there, when all he really had was a bad cut. If he hadn’t gone into shock he’d have been sent home in the early hours of the morning.

The effort it took to swing his legs off the bed and stand up was higher than he’d anticipated, and it hurt to completely straighten up. He kept his shoulders hunched over slightly, a posture that came naturally to him, as he shuffled over to the closet and took out his clothes. He quickly discovered that his shirt was missing, probably cut off in order to get a clear shot at his wound. Sighing, he slowly tugged on his pants, wondering if someone really should have been helping him. At least his rings were tucked into the front pocket, and he put them back on. It was even harder to get his boots on, the way his ribs pressed into his leg as he bent over to lace them making him hiss in pain. Finally, with no other option, he tied the scrubs he’d been given tighter at his neck and lower back, and grabbed his wallet, keys, and phone from the bottom of the bag.

He found that walking wasn’t too much of a struggle, though his knee was still aching from where he’d fallen on it last night. The jolt down his leg made him remember the nightmare he’d had while he was out, but he pushed the memory back and spoke to the nurse at the desk. He gave him directions down to the dispensary, and a list of things to do and not to do as he recovered. Keep the wound covered in the shower, change the dressing every day and keep it dry, watch for signs of infection, don’t scratch it, no exercise beyond walking, come back to have the sutures removed next Monday. Qrow took it all in with what he hoped was a genial smile but felt more like an annoyed grimace, and went to collect Ruby and Yang from the nearby waiting room.

They both seemed overjoyed to see him upright; he could tell Ruby wanted to hug him but didn’t dare. He patted them both on the shoulder instead as they descended in the elevator. They were both still wearing their clothes from last night, Ruby dressed in one of Yang’s t-shirts, and Yang in one of Qrow’s tank tops that she must have stolen from the clean laundry. It looked like they had both been awake all night, eyes bloodshot and dark-ringed.

He felt a lump rise in his throat. “You kids did well, you know?” He finally said.

They both turned to look up at him, and Yang’s face broke into a smile.

“You did pretty good too.” She replied. “Who knows why that guy was going after us? You saved us.”

“And then you saved me.” He smiled.

“Well, mostly it was the cops and the EMTs who did the saving.” Ruby put in. “We kinda just cried down the phone at the operator.”

“But if you hadn’t done that…” The sentence hung in the air, unfinished, as the elevator stopped on the second floor. “I’m proud of you both. Thank you.”

The doors opened, and both girls clung to him as they followed the signs to the dispensary, Yang arm-in-arm with him on his left and Ruby holding his right hand. He felt much younger, and knew they felt the same; the affection was almost childish, but it was honest and innocent. They didn’t let go until after he’d been to the counter, shown his ID bracelet and driver’s licence, and been told to sit down. There were lots of others here, sitting with family or alone, quietly murmuring as they waited for their medication and discharge letters. Every now and then the pharmacist at the desk would call out a name, and the patient would be given a paper bag, a sheaf of stapled papers, and a list of instructions on their medications.

It was almost an hour before Qrow’s name was called. Ruby was nodding off, her head falling forwards as her eyelids drooped, only for her to come to each time her chin hit her chest. When he was finally summoned to the desk, the pharmacist described the contents of his paper bag: extra-strength NSAID painkillers, five days’ worth of Vicodin, and reams of wound dressings and medical tape. She explained how to take the medications and described the possible side-effects in a monotone voice, then reminded him to come back in eight days to have his stitches removed. Finally, she signed his discharge papers and sent him off.

They stood outside at the pick-up point as Qrow called a cab to take them home. Yang leant on the wall with her arms folded and one leg bent, while Ruby sat down on the curb with her head in her hands.

“You know,” Qrow began when he got off the phone. “I gotta call your dad today and tell him what happened.”

Yang’s gaze was steely as she met his eye. “Exactly how detailed are you gonna get?”

“I’m not gonna mention you being late, _or_ the drinking. On one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“That in future, if your plans change, you tell me.” He sighed. “I’m not mad, and I wouldn’t be mad if you did it again as long as you let me know. But I was worrying myself sick for two hours, it’s not an experience I’d like to repeat.”

There was a long silence, broken by Ruby in a small voice. “It was my idea.”

“What?”

“It was my idea to stay longer and come meet you. We planned it the whole time, we… well, we thought we could get away with it.”

Qrow chuckled at that, he couldn’t help it, she sounded so much like her mom, that resourceful streak hidden under the sweetness. “Well, thank you for telling the truth. But next time I want some warning.” He paused. “If you’d have done this to your dad-”

“He’d have torn the town apart by now, we know.” Yang rolled her eyes. “You’re a lot cooler than dad, though.”

“Well, I think I remember being a kid better than Tai does. He is a teacher, don’t forget.”

She snorted. “Yeah, I don’t think it’s possible for teachers to be cool.”


	7. Reasonable Difficulty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow spreads the news of his injury, and receives an invitation to a meeting at Beacon High School. Warnings: Non-graphic injury description

No one was in the mood to talk or do much when they got home: Ruby went straight to bed, while Yang went to shower first. Qrow got changed immediately, hurriedly removing the itchy, papery hospital gown and replacing it with a t-shirt, pausing to inspect his wound dressing first. Then he ripped the ID bracelet off his right wrist and tossed it, and started emptying out the bag of medications. He stowed the dressings in the liquor cabinet, trying not to think about how appealing the whiskey looked, and tossed the NSAIDs into the med drawer. The Vicodin he inspected for a moment, then shoved at the back of the drawer with the citalopram. He could get by just fine without them. Besides, they were the kind of thing he couldn’t trust himself with.

He brewed himself a coffee, thankful for something better than the godawful hospital fare, and sat down with a bag of pretzel sticks and his phone. He desperately wanted to relax, throw on the TV and not think, but there were a lot of people to contact. His ability to bend down was decreased severely enough that he didn’t think he could get behind a bar this week, and of course Tai needed to know what had happened so he didn’t go ballistic the next time he saw Qrow. But first, Ruby and Yang had ruined their sleep schedules, and he didn’t want to fight them about going to school tomorrow.

He typed a polite email to the principal of the high school, addressed to ‘Dear Sir/Madam’ as he still hadn’t bothered to learn their name. He briefly detailed the events of the last eighteen hours and followed up with an explanation of why Ruby and Yang wouldn’t be in school on Monday, which boiled down to them being tired and traumatised. Hoping the principal would be sympathetic, he signed off with his full name, and a phone number to seem approachable, even though he was sure they already had it on file. He sent it without proofreading and moved on to his next, bigger problem: Salem.

She was not happy to hear from him; her voice strained with barely-controlled anger. Qrow got impatient with her in return, repeating that yes, he had in fact been _stabbed_ , and what did she expect from him? He wasn’t in the mood to fight, but he was tired, sober, and in pain, and he would if he had to. Eventually, she backed down, her tone calming as she explained that his incident was already in the local news and that there was now a crime scene cleaning crew power-washing his blood off the parking lot.

“This is very bad publicity.” She said darkly.

Qrow bit his lip to suppress the string of expletives on the tip of his tongue and agreed, instead of describing to her all the various ways his body hurt and the number of times he’d relived the experience already. She wouldn’t understand, and he didn’t really want her to; he didn’t want her watching him any closer on the job. But finally, she agreed to have An take on his shifts for the next week, and to work An’s herself. Qrow didn’t really consider that a fair deal, but protesting was just going to land him in even further trouble. He accepted her demand that he come in as soon as his stitches had been removed the next Monday, and hung up.

“Thank Christ.” He muttered to himself, glad to no longer have to hear her voice.

Taiyang was next on the list, and last for now; there would probably be calls to and from his insurance company later, but that could wait. Qrow dialled his number and waited apprehensively for him to pick up. He was concerned that telling Tai about what had happened while he was across the world, unable to help, might aggravate his anxiety. The fact that there was nothing he could do wouldn’t stop his mutinous mind from dwelling on it, wouldn’t stop his chest hurting and heart beating too fast. All Qrow could do was explain things calmly and hope that Tai’s medication did its job.

The first time he called, no one picked up; it eventually went to voicemail, but Qrow hung up and tried again. This time, it was answered quickly, though Tai’s voice was husky and slow.

“Hey, sorry Qrow, I must’ve fallen asleep.” He yawned. “How are you doing?”

“Uh… Not so bad, all in all. You?”

“Ugh, I’m getting sick. Just a cold or something, but it’s really wiped me out. What’s going on, by the way, I thought one call a week was enough for you?” Tai teased.

“Yeah, about that.” Qrow hesitated. “I need to tell you about something, and I need you to promise not to freak out. I know that’s not easy, but just listen.”

“What? Is this to do with the girls?” His voice was hard and frantic all of a sudden.

“No, it’s not, not really. Everyone’s fine, we’re all safe at home. But you’d lose your shit if I didn’t tell you, so just listen.”

“I’m listening.”

Qrow described what had happened to him the night before in brief terms and without going into too much detail about his injury. Every now and then Tai interrupted with a gasp or groan, but mostly he was silent as the story ran its course.

“They just gave me some painkillers and bandages and told me to come back next Monday.” Qrow finished. “So it’s not as bad as it looked.”

“Jesus Christ, Qrow.” Tai took a shaky breath. “So this guy, this… Tyrian? He’s just out there?”

“Yeah. That’s the part that worries me too. But the cops have his description, and he’s pretty odd-looking. If he sticks around, they’ll probably catch him.”

“You can’t know that.”

“Of course I can’t, but I have to have _some_ trust, don’t I?” He shook his head, though Tai couldn’t see it. “I don’t like to think about the alternative.”

“Me neither. I mean, if he was gonna go after Ruby and Yang-”

“I don’t know that he got a good look at them. It’s dark in that alleyway and I got him on the ground before he could get close.”

“Still, maybe they shouldn’t be out around town on their own anymore.”

“What else can they do? I can’t walk them to and from school when I’m working, and if I try and stop them doing things with their friends they’re just gonna sneak out. They have their own keys.”

Tai’s sigh was defeated and demoralised. “You can’t at least walk them there and back this week while you’re at home?”

“Tai, I struggled to get up the stairs when I got back here today.” Qrow chewed on his lip again. “I know this isn’t ideal, but all I can do is tell them what to look out for. They’re smart and sensible, I know they’ll be fine.”

“Yeah. I guess.”

“You know, they were the ones who called 911 and got the cops and ambulance there.” Qrow almost felt the proud glow that suddenly emanated out of Tai from down the line.

“Yeah, that’s my girls.” He chuckled. “Remember when we first taught them how to do that, when Yang was six and Ruby was four?”

“And Ruby called the cops for a casual afternoon chat and I had to explain what had happened when they showed up? Yeah, I remember.” Qrow smiled, remembering how the sheer panic that had flooded him at seeing four police officers on the doorstep had quickly abated when Ruby had greeted them like old friends. That was a laughable memory from a very dark time over the year after Summer’s death.

“Do you ever miss those days?” Tai asked, and his voice was quieter now.

Qrow decided to be honest. “Sometimes. I miss when Ruby and Yang thought the world was mostly sunshine and roses, and I miss… the house. I miss Patch. But everything has to end, doesn’t it? Things change.”

There was a long silence before Tai replied. “Yeah. Yeah, they do.”

They circled back around to talking about Qrow’s health, Tai listing off all the signs of infection he should look out for. Qrow just listened through most of it: The nurse had told him all of this earlier, but infection was a particular worry of Tai’s, and he knew it would make him feel better. Finally, with Tai satisfied that Qrow was okay, they ended the call, and Qrow switched his phone to silent. He knew Tai probably wouldn’t sleep much tonight, and would probably text him in a couple of hours with all the things he’d forgotten to ask.

In the meantime, while Qrow wasn’t tired enough to go back to sleep, he wanted nothing more than to lie down again. He got up for a glass of water and took two painkillers as he’d been instructed, then lay on the couch with both drink and snack in reach. There had to be something on TV that could distract him from everything going on in his life right now.

* * *

 

Qrow slept dreamlessly that night for the first time in weeks, waking up on Monday morning thankful even through the pain in his side. He took a shower and carefully removed the dressing from the wound, wiping away a small amount of dried blood and checking it in the mirror. It looked fine, if not exactly good, and as he fetched the new dressings from the kitchen where he’d left them he felt a lot less worried about it.

Once the wound was covered again and he’d gotten dressed, he went right back to the liquor cabinet. He didn’t want to admit it, but his hands were shaking and his head was starting to ache. If he didn’t have a drink soon, he’d start getting jittery, anxious, and confused, then irritable as heart palpitations set in. That was as far as he’d ever been down the road of withdrawal symptoms, and it had been terrifying enough that he didn’t want to repeat the experience. A mixed drink with breakfast wouldn’t do him any more harm than had already been done, and with that in mind he poured a generous amount of whiskey into a glass of apple juice and started to drink.

He took the glass back to his bedroom and picked up his phone from the nightstand. As he’d expected, he had three texts from Taiyang, two timestamped a couple hours after they’d spoken, the last five hours later.

‘ _hey, I forgot to mention it, did you get the cash I wired? It’s just for sports stuff for the kids._ ’

‘ _oh and if Yang wants new sneakers try to get her to buy boots instead, I’m buying her sneakers for Christmas_.’

‘ _I’m really glad you’re okay, buddy. Thanks for all this x’_

Qrow felt warmth that had nothing to do with whiskey rush through his chest as he reread the last text. Tai wasn’t always the most open about his emotions, not in writing, though it wasn’t for lack of trying; nerves often kept him silent. Messages like this meant that Tai had probably written and rewritten the words over and over trying to get them just right. Such a simple sentiment had a lot of effort behind it, and while Qrow wished things were easier for Tai, it made him glad to know that he was still worth it.

He checked his online bank account and found the money that Tai had mentioned, then quickly typed out a reply. He ended it with a little ‘x’ of his own, an exchange of hesitant, distant affection. Then, still wearing the ghost of a smile, he checked the rest of the notifications on his phone. He’d received an automated reply to his email to the principal of Beacon High School, acknowledging that it had been read and someone would get back to him shortly. And he had a voicemail from an unknown number, from just past nine this morning.

He took a sip of his drink as he brought his phone up to his ear to listen, and was greeted by an unfamiliar voice:

“Good morning, this is a representative of Beacon High School. I’m calling to inform you that Professor Pine would like to speak to Yang Xiao Long and Ruby Rose, accompanied by a parent or guardian, at 9 am on Tuesday, September twelfth. If this time or date are inconvenient for you, please call back on this number between 9 am and 4 pm, Monday to Friday, to rearrange the meeting. Thank you.”

Qrow frowned a little, but he supposed it wasn’t odd that someone at the school wanted to speak to him about what had happened, especially if he’d reached the local newspaper already. At least, presumably, he’d learnt the principal’s name, though a title like Professor didn’t tell him much about Pine. Probably they just wanted the girls’ side of the story, to offer them counselling, and to make sure Qrow was mostly sane. Still, whatever support they could get was worth having, and tomorrow morning worked for him: what else was he doing?

He went back to the kitchen, entering the living area just in time to see Yang throwing a grape across the room into Ruby’s mouth, and the celebration that followed.

“You’re feeling better, then?” He asked, deadpan.

They both turned to face him, Ruby chewing the grape and Yang pausing in the process of chopping fruit.

“You don’t need to answer that.” He cracked a smile. “Early lunch or late breakfast?”

“Lunch.” Yang replied. “I woke up at five, Ruby’s been up since...”

“Three thirty.” Ruby finished. “We didn’t disturb you, did we?”

“No, not at all.” Qrow walked over to the counter and stole an apple slice from Yang’s cutting board. “I got a call this morning, though. They wanna see both of you, and me, at school tomorrow morning. Professor Pine wants to talk to us.”

“Professor Pine?” Ruby repeated.

“Yeah, you mean Professor Ozpin?”

The name seemed to echo for a moment in Yang’s voice, and Qrow felt the blood run out of his face. “Ozpin?”

“Yeah, he asked us to call him by his first name on the first day of the semester. I guess it’s more distinctive or something.” Ruby frowned at Qrow in confusion. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Qrow realised his mouth had dropped open at some point. He closed it and shook his head. “It’s nothing.”

“Do you know him?” Yang asked, and when he looked her eyes were narrowed in a familiar perceptive stare.

“No, we don’t know each other. Just… heard the name before.”

“I mean, I know it’s pretty weird, but… Hey!”

Qrow had stolen another apple slice in an attempt to distract her.

“So, when do we have to talk to him?” Ruby asked.

“They said nine.”

“Oh, that means I miss social studies! Amazing.”

“And I get to skip physics.” Yang’s expression quickly became downturned. “Probably not worth… all of this, though.” She gestured at Qrow, and he nodded.

“It isn’t, but if the school’s worth a damn they’ll get you two in to talk to a counsellor or something and you can deal with it.”

“What if we don’t wanna talk to a counsellor?” Ruby asked quietly. She’d moved closer to the kitchen area, leaning with her palms on the edge of the drying rack.

“Why wouldn’t you?”

“Well… isn’t it scary, talking to a stranger about all the bad stuff that’s happened?”

Qrow sighed and nodded. “Yeah, it is. But it’ll get easier, and it’s worth doing. The sooner you talk about stuff, the sooner you can stop thinking about it. Yeah?”

“I don’t know.”

“Look, if that’s what… Professor Ozpin wants you to do, at least try it out, just once. If you hate it and you don’t wanna do it again, I doubt anyone’s gonna make you. They’re only gonna have so many counsellors there, someone dropping out is just gonna lighten their workload.” He reached over to pat Ruby’s shoulder. “And you can always talk to me or Yang. We just might not know the right thing to say the way a professional does.”

“Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

“So why do they wanna see you?” Yang asked, transferring her fruit to a large bowl. “Are they just making sure you’re telling the truth about getting hurt?”

“I don’t know.” Qrow replied contemplatively. “Maybe, or to make sure I’m still capable of… you know, supporting you two.”

“Why wouldn’t you be?”

“Well, I was kinda vague when I told them what was going on.”

“Maybe Professor Ozpin just wants to make sure you’re okay.”

Qrow snorted, but he couldn’t deny that it was a possibility. After all, he remembered, he’d signed off the email with his full name. If Ozpin really had read it, and not just the secretary or whoever left the voicemail, he would have recognised the name; there weren’t exactly a lot of Qrow Branwens in Vale. Even without that, Ozpin had been in the bar not long before Tyrian had made a scene, and knew that Qrow was the only one working after nine. If he’d read the news, even though he hadn't been named, it wouldn’t have been hard for him to put two and two together.

He dwelled on it for most of the day, downing drink after drink but only becoming jitterier. He wanted to deny the reason to himself, put it aside and pretend it wasn’t happening, but so far, that had not helped him. Instead, he tried to distract himself, exchanged messages with Tai, played video games with Yang and Ruby, cooked a big hotpot for dinner and even helped Ruby bake cookies from her mom’s favourite recipe. It didn’t quite keep his mind off Ozpin entirely, but enough to stop him from obsessing over the issue. Even when he went to bed, he was diverted by memories of Summer and the girls baking together, flour all over the kitchen and smiles that radiated joy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternative title for this chapter could be 'Dramatic Irony: We all knew that was coming'. Also yeah this one ends abruptly because I didn't start writing this in chapters until like... chapter eleven? So I had to split it in a weird place. This is what happens when you don't think ahead.


	8. Imploration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow visits Beacon High School, and has a necessary talk with Ozpin. Warnings: Nightmares/flashbacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've reread this chapter probably 10 times since I wrote it so if I missed any mistakes it's because I've become completely desensitised to them. I like this one a lot though, hopefully you all do too!

_The hills were dark, thick trees blocking out any light there might have been. He climbed, tripping on roots and snagged by thorns until he reached the top, and a clearing where a shallow pond rippled gently in the breeze. Moonlight broke through the clouds, and struck a figure across the water, clad in a white hood. His first thought was Summer, and his breathing was stricken as he moved closer, a stitch in his side._

_As he approached, though, the figure stretched, grew taller, and the white hood was actually silvery hair. Ozpin’s eyes were glowing, searing gold as he turned, and Qrow shrank away. He had an urge to look at the ground, and spotted nettles at his feet. He began to pick them without thinking, his right hand on fire with the prickly sting of their leaves. It seemed like hours that he gathered them before Ozpin was suddenly at his side, grasping his hand and guiding it away from the weeds, using it to pull him upright._

* * *

 

Qrow woke up lying on his right hand, the pressure making it buzz with pins and needles, his arm pressing into his wound and making it ache. He turned over and blinked away the details of what his mind had shown him, unwilling to think too hard about it. Dreams like that didn’t mean anything; it was the human equivalent of a drive defragmentation, it was just an information dump. He’d just been worrying too much.

Ruby and Yang were up before him again: He could just hear their voices through the wall as he got himself ready for the day. Most of his clean clothes were not ironed, and the one neatly folded t-shirt he found was tight enough that the bulk of fresh gauze under his ribs could be seen through it. He sighed at himself in the mirror and threw a sweater over the top to cover it up. He undeniably looked like hell, and was starting to feel like it too; his painkillers from the night before had worn off long ago and he’d clearly aggravated the wound. The idea of facing Ozpin in such a state made him grimace at his reflection.

He forced himself to eat breakfast, adding whiskey to his apple juice the same way he had yesterday and using the concoction to take his painkillers. When Ruby and Yang came to make their own breakfasts, he put together lunches for them, and added sports drinks and water bottles to each of their backpacks. He was ready to leave by eight-fifteen, and spent the next fifteen minutes fidgeting with his phone on the couch while Ruby finished the last bowl of cereal and Yang packed up her school supplies.

“Are you gonna be okay walking to and from the school?” Yang asked when she was done.

“I’ll be fine.” Qrow replied, though he wasn’t as sure as his tone suggested. “Although, there’s something you can do for me.” He pulled out his wallet and handed her a twenty dollar bill. “Stop at the convenience store on your way home and pick some stuff up. I can’t go grocery shopping like this. We need milk, bread, whatever else you guys want for your lunches.”

“We need more cereal!” Ruby piped up.

“Yeah, that too. You can get yourselves some snacks or something with whatever’s left.”

“Are you sure, Uncle Qrow?” Yang’s expression was concerned, and Qrow realised with a pang that this kind of mild generosity was out of character for him.

“I think you deserve it, after this weekend.” He hauled himself up from the sofa with a wince. “Come on, we’d better go. I can’t walk too fast right now.”

* * *

 

The journey up to Beacon was easy at first, but once they reached the incline of the hills, Qrow began to flag. Ruby and Yang walked at his sides this time, and he caught Ruby glancing worriedly at him several times when he slowed. By the time they reached the school gates, he was sweating from the exertion and pain. He took off his sweater, holding it against his side to hide the lumpy wound dressing, and let Yang lead them in.

They checked in at the reception desk, and Qrow was given a sticker to wear with his name and the purpose of his visit on it. Then they were directed down a familiar hallway to the left, to a door marked simply ‘Principal’. Qrow knew the area well; he’d been sent to the office many times during his own school career. It hadn’t changed much. He knocked, and was called to enter by a voice he recognised as the one who had left him the voicemail.

They walked into a narrow office that had been turned into a sort of waiting room, with a row of chairs against the wall on either side of the door, overseen by a desk in front of the window. Between them on either side, other doors led out of the room, the one on the left labelled with a nameplate. The secretary at the desk smiled pleasantly.

“Mr Branwen. Professor Pine will be with you in a few moments, please take a seat.” She gestured at the chairs on the left.

They sat down, Qrow carefully lowering himself into the chair and restraining a grunt of pain that made him squeeze his eyes shut. His painkillers hadn’t kicked in yet, and he desperately hoped they would before he had to walk back down the hill. Silence filled the room, not even a muffled mumble audible from behind the office door. Qrow’s heart was beating fast, and he could put it down to exertion or he could acknowledge that the reason was actually sitting some six feet behind him on the other side of the wall.

He had the distinct urge to melt into the floor and become part of the carpet.

It was just past nine when the door to Ozpin’s office opened and a girl with long white hair stalked out, ponytail flying as she swung the door open angrily.

“Was that…?” Yang whispered.

“That was Weiss!” Ruby squeaked in return. “I wonder what she was doing here.”

“If I find out she’s trying to get you in trouble-”

“Yang.” Qrow inclined his head towards the secretary, and Yang leaned back in her seat, folding her arms.

It wasn’t much longer before the secretary spoke again:

“Professor Pine will see you now.” She gestured vaguely towards the office door. “No need to knock, just go right in.”

Qrow led the way, pausing to read the nameplate on the door. _Professor Ozpin Pine_ , it read, followed by a list of letters that meant absolutely nothing to Qrow. He walked into the office and held the door for Ruby and Yang to follow.

The room was wide and mostly empty: a broad executive desk took up most of the space, with three mismatched chairs pulled up in front of it. Bookshelves lined the walls, and a large picture window made the space bright and airy. Ozpin was standing at the sill staring out, but turned as soon as he heard the door open. His smile was kind and a little sad, and he made eye contact with Qrow for a moment before moving to the desk.

“Good morning.” He said. “I’m glad to see you all, though I wish it were under better circumstances. Please, have a seat.”

They sat, Qrow in the middle, Yang on his left, Ruby on the right. Qrow was still holding his sweater to his side and caught Ozpin looking at it, a little worried.

“I’m very sorry to hear about the events of this weekend. I’m sure it’s been a very difficult time for you all.” He fixed his eyes on Qrow again. “How is your recovery going?”

Qrow sighed. “It’s going. Just not very quickly.”

“Of course, that’s understandable. It will, of course, have an effect on all of you, whether physical or mental.” His gaze swept over them all one by one. “The reason I wanted to meet with you is to offer assistance. Extra time for Miss Xiao Long and Miss Rose to complete assignments if necessary, and counselling here at the school. If you’d like to take it, of course.”

Qrow looked at them sideways, first Yang, then Ruby. When neither of them spoke, he nudged them gently.

“I… think I’d like to speak to someone.” Yang finally answered.

“Me too.” Ruby nodded, then shook herself. “Uh, please.”

“Of course.” Ozpin repeated. “We only have the capacity to allow six sessions per student, unfortunately, but each session is an hour where you’ll be one to one with your counsellor. Anything you talk about will be confidential.”

“Anything?” Yang glanced at Qrow.

“Unless we fear that you’re likely to hurt someone or be hurt, yes. Do you have any other questions?”

“Um… If we don’t like it, can we stop before the six sessions are up?” Ruby asked quietly. She was twining and untwining her fingers in her lap.

“Yes, there’s no contract binding you to complete all six. If you feel you no longer need to see the counsellor after less than that, you can let them know, and your remaining sessions will be saved in case you need them again.”

“Right.”

“Is there a set time for them?” Yang asked. “Like, am I gonna miss classes or have to take out lunch?”

“You can set whatever time and day of the week for your first meeting that you like, whatever is most convenient for you. Once you go to that, you can set up a regular time with your counsellor, and they’ll do their best to stick to that time through the rest of your sessions.”

“Oh. Okay, thanks.”

“Not a problem. Is that everything you have to ask?”

“I got a question.” Qrow leaned forwards slightly. “If anything worrying comes up… Am I the first one to know?”

“Qrow.” Ruby grumbled and nudged him, and he knew he was being a little rude, but also that he could get away with it.

“You are the legal guardian, so yes, you will be first to know.” Ozpin answered calmly. “Anything else?”

Qrow shook his head, and there was a short silence as Ozpin’s impassive gaze passed over them all again.

“Very good.” He reached into a desk drawer and took out a pad of school letterhead paper and a pen, then started writing in quick, neat script. “Then I wish the both of you luck in your recovery, and hope that nothing like this happens again.” He signed the note and tore it off, then started on another. “I’m going to ask both of you to go straight to the front reception desk and set a time for your first counselling appointments. Then I’d like you to go to the classes you should be in. Give your teachers these notes and apologise for being late; I’m sure they’ll understand.” He signed the second one and slid it across the desk to Yang, and handed the first to Ruby.

“Thank you, Professor.” Ruby and Yang stood up.

Qrow went to follow, but wasn’t out of the chair before Ozpin spoke again:

“Just a moment, Mr Branwen. I’d like to speak to you alone.”

The girls picked up their backpacks and walked out of the office, Yang pausing to wave at Qrow before the door closed. He smiled and half-waved back, then turned to Ozpin.

“’Mr Branwen’?” He quoted, one eyebrow raised. “Thought we were on a first name basis?”

“We are, but I’m not sure it’s appropriate for my students to know that.” He stood up and stretched, wincing as something popped. “I think Ruby and Yang would have something to say about it, don’t you?”

Qrow shrugged. “They’ve got something to say about everything. But yeah, I’m not sure I want them to know I’m pals with their principal.”

Ozpin hummed thoughtfully and walked back around to the window, this time perching on the sill looking into the room. The morning sun backlit him, his silver hair seeming to glow like a halo.

Qrow turned in his chair to face him and clenched his hands into painful fists around his sweater at the sight. He realised he’d never spoken to Ozpin without a barrier of some sort between them, usually the bar. Seeing this formal, dignified man gently swinging his legs off the window sill humanised him, and Qrow felt the same way he had the first time they’d met: That his company was strangely intimate. “So, what did you wanna see me alone for?”

“Well, while I can’t offer you school counselling, I know that Ruby and Yang are not the only ones who need it.” He glanced at the sweater again and sighed, a note of worry returning to his voice. “You must be in a lot of pain.”

Qrow didn’t miss the implication that there was more to it than a knife wound. “Yeah. I am.” He tried not to think about nightmares. How many times had he relived that moment? All the wind knocked out of him, manic eyes, his own bloody hands finding the wall of the bar, the blue lights…

“Are you seeking counselling yourself? Therapy?”

“No.” He sighed. “Look, I’ve not exactly had a good run with therapists. I’ve seen two in my life, and…” He shook his head and remembered.

_The first one had listened to him talk for half an hour and then told him he should find someone else because she wasn’t qualified to deal with the depth of his issues. The second… He still wished he’d punched the second guy, the one he saw after Summer died and who had told him he had no right to grieve when he hadn’t been the one she was in a relationship with, like that made any difference to how much he had loved her and how huge a hole she had left in his life._

“They just didn’t help me.” Qrow finished.

“I admit it isn’t for everyone. Some people do react poorly, but others react remarkably well. Of course, I trust your judgement; you know yourself best. Though I hope you won’t judge _me_ too harshly for saying this: You have a duty to those girls.”

Qrow ducked his head. “I know. But I’ve been doing just fine so far.”

“I won’t deny that, but these are not ordinary circumstances.” He paused and his expression softened. “Qrow, I’m concerned about you. Not for where you are, but for the path you’re going down, and which Ruby and Yang will have no choice but to follow with you. I don’t know you well, but I worry.”

“With all due respect, Oz, you don’t know me at all.” Qrow’s voice came out harder than he’d anticipated, but if Ozpin noticed, he didn’t acknowledge it.

“Maybe so. But I do know a person who needs help when I see them.” He gave Qrow a hopeful smile. “If you don’t want to speak to a professional, you could always speak to me.”

Qrow was stunned into silence for a moment. “Y-you?” He stumbled before finding his voice again. “You mean the half hour a day you spend at the bar? Is that really worth it?”

“I didn’t mean at the bar.” Ozpin said patiently. “We could meet on weekends, wherever you see fit. Somewhere quiet. I used to be a counsellor too, before I started teaching. You may find it more comfortable to talk to someone you’re friendly with than a stranger.”

“But why?” Qrow blurted out. “Not that I’m not grateful for the option, but… what’s the point?”

The stare Ozpin fixed him with could have cut glass. “Kindness, Qrow.”

There was a long silence as he covered his face with his hand, breathed deeply and tried to calm his frantic heartrate. Something flared in his chest, whether anger or fear or something else entirely, he didn’t know. He wanted to say no. He _should_ say no, but there was something appealing about a quiet place, a walk in the woods or a seat on the boardwalk with Ozpin. Getting things off his chest. Their hands brushing and eyes meeting and-

_No, Qrow._

Before he could speak, though, his mutinous body was already working, his head nodding seemingly without his input.

“Where and when?” He finally asked.

“This weekend.” Ozpin replied quickly, his gaze soft again. “I don’t imagine you’re working, so… Saturday morning, maybe 10 am? We can meet wherever is most convenient for you.”

“How about the Lookout?” Again, the words escaped him almost without thought. But the rocky promontory overlooking the beach was close enough to his apartment that, by Saturday, he thought he’d be able to walk to it without much difficulty.

“That sounds suitable.” Oz nodded. “Then it’s agreed. I’ll ask that you don’t let Ruby and Yang know. There are enough rumours about what I do at the weekends flying around this school.” He smiled, and Qrow couldn’t resist returning it.

“Right.”

“Then I think that’s all. Are you able to get home alright?”

“Uh…” Qrow inclined his head and grimaced. “Great question.”

Ozpin quirked an eyebrow nervously. “How did you get here?”

“Walked, but…” He looked down at the gauze visible through his shirt again. “I kinda overestimated myself.”

“I’ll drive you, if you like. I don’t have any more appointments until after ten.”

Qrow glanced up at the clock, then back at Ozpin, who was looking hopeful again. The instinct to refuse was there again, that childish _I can do it myself_ attitude waiting to be heard. But the memory of how bad he’d hurt by the time he’d walked up to the school soon put a hard, rational stop to it. “If you’re sure you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.” He hopped down from the windowsill and walked back behind the desk, where he picked up a set of keys from the top drawer. His hand hovered over his cane where it leant against the wall, before moving away without taking it. “Come with me.”

Qrow followed Oz out of the office, back into the little waiting room space where a short boy with white hair was now sitting. He nearly walked into the principal’s back as he stopped.

“Back again, are we, Mr Schnee? What is it this time, hm?” Ozpin asked, his voice sharp.

The boy mumbled something, but was talked over by the secretary:

“The same thing as the last two times, Professor.”

Ozpin sighed and shook his head. “I thought as much. You know, I’ve already spoken to your sister this morning. At this rate, I’ll be writing to your father about both of you.”

The boy looked up, icy blue eyes wide.

“I have somewhere to be, Whitley, but I’ll be back in fifteen minutes. In the meantime, feel free to try to come up with a better excuse than last time.”

Qrow hurried after him as he swept out of the room, wheels turning in his brain. He waited until they were a decent distance from the door before speaking. “Wait, if that’s Whitley Schnee… His sister is-”

“Weiss Schnee, yes. You probably saw her leaving this morning.” Ozpin strode past the main entrance and down another quiet corridor; class was in session, and there were few students around. “I understand you employ the eldest daughter at your bar.”

“Yeah. Winter.”

“I shouldn’t really tell you this, but… Weiss came to speak to me about Ruby.”

Qrow narrowed his eyes as they turned the corner towards another exit at the end of the hall. “What for?”

“She seems to think that Ruby is going to affect her grade in social studies. They’ve been placed in a project group together. However, while Ruby and the other group members have been working hard, Weiss is so concerned with Ruby herself that she’s barely contributed. Mr Port has spoken to her about it already.”

“Figures.” Qrow rolled his eyes as they stepped out into the staff parking lot.

“I think, or at least I hope, that I talked some sense into her today, although I doubt she will take it easily." Ozpin sighed. “Unfortunately, the Schnee children are very much a product of their upbringing. I can’t pretend to know all the details, but I know Jacques Schnee well, and he… leaves a lot to be desired.” He walked up to a low-slung sedan in British racing green and unlocked the doors.

Qrow got into the front passenger seat, wincing a little as he aggravated his side and waving Ozpin off before he could comment. “So… What was Whitley there in for?” He knew he was testing his luck, but figured he’d never know if he didn’t ask.

Oz was silent for a moment as he fastened his seatbelt and adjusted the rear-view mirror, making the rosary that hung from it swing slightly. Finally, he answered. “Whitley Schnee has a deserved reputation as a bully. Bad enough that the headmaster of his middle school warned me about it. His latest target has been my son.”

“Your son?” Qrow repeated, more in shock that Ozpin had a child old enough to be in high school than that Whitley was bullying him. He watched his unchanging expression as he backed the car out of the parking space.

“Whereabouts do you live, Qrow?” He asked casually as they left the lot.

“Oh, uh… You know Bayside Apartments?”

Ozpin nodded, and continued on the previous subject as though they hadn’t departed from it. “Yes, Oscar’s… small for his age, and very shy. He likes to be left alone to read. With that, and being the son of the principal… Well, you can imagine.”

“Yeah. I can. I’m sorry to hear about that.”

“Whitley will be put into In-School Suspension today, since he’s already been in my office three times since the semester started. One more incident and he’ll be suspended, at which point I shall have Jacques Schnee at my door demanding to know why his _perfect_ child is in such trouble.” Ozpin gave a mirthless huff of laughter. “But I digress. I actually wanted to ask you one more thing.”

Qrow’s eyes narrowed in trepidation, but he nodded.

“Would you tell me the full story about Saturday night? If you’d rather not, that’s fine, but-”

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t mind.” He took a deep breath and started explaining exactly what had happened, from Tyrian’s outburst at the bar to his appearance outside, from the knife wound to the ambulance, the stitches to the brusque nurses and the medication he’d been sent home with. By the time he was finished, Ozpin was turning in to the parking lot of his apartment building.

He pulled into a space and turned off the engine, then shook his head. He was frowning. “That is all very troubling. You haven’t heard back from the local police?”

“No. They said they’d be in touch if they found anything new.”

“He may have just been a visitor into town.” Ozpin suggested. “But that doesn’t mean he won’t return. For now, it would be prudent for you to focus on resting.”

“Yeah, I think I can manage that.” Qrow opened the car door, but was stopped by a hand landing on his arm and squeezing gently.

“Take care of yourself, Qrow.” There was softness in his voice, worry in his eyes.

Qrow nodded jerkily. His face felt like it was on fire. “I will. You too.”

Ozpin relinquished his grip on his arm and started the engine again as Qrow got out.

He watched the sleek car turn around and drive out of the parking lot, and it was all he could do not to fall to his knees right there. He felt weak and wobbly, part stunned and part sheer terrified. His arm where Oz had grabbed it was buzzing as though he had had an electric shock. And for some goddamn reason, he’d agreed to meet him on Saturday and… what? Discuss his personal problems? Talk through his trauma? He wasn’t even sure.

But through all the uncertainty, he believed one thing: He could trust Ozpin.


	9. Tides of Loneliness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Recovery is a slow process, but Qrow hears from an old friend after a long absence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to be all swish and bartender-y tonight and made daiquiris for me and my family but I made them too strong and messed up the kitchen. Made me think of a younger Qrow in his first bar job struggling with everything. It must take a hell of a lot of training to get to professional status. Anyway this chapter's got nothing to do with bartending I just wanted you all to know! Enjoy!

Qrow spent most of the day alternating between lying on the couch watching TV and lying in his bed trying to nap. More painkillers and more whiskey were helping the pain in his side, but now there was an itching discomfort creeping across the wound that took all his self-control not to scratch. He was glad when Ruby and Yang burst into the apartment with bags of groceries and snacks, their presence a welcome distraction.

He let them put the food away and trawled through the cabinets and refrigerator after them, trying to decide on dinner. They had picked up more than a few things he would never have chosen himself, mostly the kind of sugary crap he hated. But at the front of one of the cabinets, he found a small box of cinnamon flavoured candy, the kind he never bought anymore. He turned to Ruby, who was sitting at the dining table.

“Are these…” He trailed off, shaking the box slightly.

“Yeah, they’re for you.” Ruby’s expression became worried. “You do still like them, right?”

“Yeah, of course I do. Just didn’t expect you to know that.”

“I was texting dad today and he said you used to always have pack on you when you were kids.” She smiled a little wistfully.

“I did.” Qrow turned the little box over, listening to the candies rattle. “Thanks, kid.”

“Hey, I helped!” Yang put in from where she was lying with her head over the arm of the couch.

“Oh, my apologies.” Qrow said sarcastically, but smiled. “Well, thank you too, Firecracker.”

“So, aren’t you gonna tell us why Professor Ozpin wanted to talk to you today?”

He stopped breathing for a moment, all thoughts grinding to a halt. He couldn’t tell them the truth, but he hadn’t come up with an acceptable lie. After a moment’s thought, he put the candies back and turned to lean on the counter. “Ozpin wanted me to think about seeing a counsellor too. But I said no.”

“You don’t want to?” Ruby asked, tilting her head.

“I don’t need to.” Qrow corrected. “I’m doing just fine.”

“Why did you convince us to do it then?” Yang asked, throwing her arms up above her head. “You’re the one that got hurt!”

“Yeah, but I got _hurt_ , I’m not…” He sighed and gritted his teeth. “Look, you two have a lot of life ahead of you and a lot of daily stress at school already. I’m… going along the same way I always have. I’m more worried for you than I am for myself.”

“You couldn’t just ‘try one session’ and see if it helps?” She shaped the quotations with her fingers in the air.

“I’ve been to counselling before.” Qrow said sharply. “It doesn’t suit me.”

Yang didn’t reply, just sighed and dropped her arms.

He stood up straight and turned back to the cabinet, forcing his voice to lighten. “Anyway, what can we make for dinner out of all this stuff you bought?”

* * *

 

Qrow had nightmares again that night, and the next, and the next. It was always one thing to another, waking up from seeing Tyrian’s grin in a cold sweat and falling asleep to transition into the aftermath of the accident, a white blanket on the road, Tai screaming. He’d jerk out of a dream about his father’s steel toe cap boots and right into one about Ruby and Yang, lost and screaming in some dark, labyrinthine prison. Most mornings he woke up feeling like he’d barely slept at all.

He was healing physically, if not mentally; the cut on his side was looking better every day, and he could see the skin sealing itself between the stitches. He walked around the block once the girls had gone to school each morning and found that by Friday, he could have gone further if he’d wanted. Instead, he chose to save his energy for Saturday; the Lookout was only ten minutes away, but it was mostly uphill. Even so, his apprehension about his recovery was fading.

His confidence was limited, though, and he found himself jittery again as Friday wore on. Ruby and Yang would be home late tonight; Yang had signed up for the kickboxing classes she’d been waiting for, and he’d asked Ruby to stay for homework club so that neither of them had to walk home alone. Tai would have wanted that. In the meantime, he was going stir-crazy; he didn’t often think about the level of structure that work brought to his life, but he was missing it. There was only so much TV he could watch, only so many hours of video games he could deal with before he started thinking in pixels. Besides that, he felt bad for An, whom he knew Salem had cajoled into working longer hours.

When his phone buzzed on the coffee table he almost fell off the couch in his rush to see what was happening, glad of the diversion. The notification was so politely worded that he thought it was a spam message at first, unable to think of anyone he knew who would talk like that. A rush of fondness washed over him as he read the name of the sender:

_James Ironwood_

Qrow chuckled disbelievingly to himself, wide-eyed, and unlocked his phone to read the full message.

_‘Hi Qrow, I know it’s been a long time but hopefully you don’t mind me getting back in touch. I’d like to speak to you about a few things, but I’m not sure when you’re available. If you don’t mind letting me know when you’re free, I’ll give you a call then. Hope you’re well._ ’

‘ **Ring my bell Ironwood I’m free as a bird.** ’ Qrow replied, then dropped his phone into his lap and ran his hands through his hair. It had been three years since he’d last spoken to James Ironwood, since his role as a member of the Oregon House of Representatives had started taking up most of his time and energy.

_They’d met when Qrow was in his first (and only) year of college, James in his second year of law school. Everyone had expected them to hate each other, and at first maybe they had; Qrow had found James uptight and boring, heavy workload keeping him too busy to party and his wealthy parents monitoring his every move. For his part, Qrow was sure that James had hated him too, had found him coarse and brash and argumentative. At one of the few parties James had made it to, an outdoor get-together that some of his own friends were holding, he’d described Qrow as an ‘aggravating, callous, egocentric little cynic’, and then called him the next day to apologise._

_That was the moment Qrow had decided he wanted to be his friend, and when he had dropped out of college and moved to the tiny town of Patch with Tai, he’d made an effort to stay in touch with James. They’d clashed on a lot of things, but when it came down to the wire, they could rely on each other. James had sent Qrow well wishes on the births of his nieces and Qrow had congratulated James after the birth of his own daughter. He’d supported the man through his divorce and the start of his political career, gone with him to seemingly endless boring country club events and insulted the old rich people that populated them behind his drinks while James had stifled laughs and elbowed him in the ribs._

_But time was scant, and Qrow’s long shifts and James’ campaigning had driven them apart._

It was another half hour before James finally called, and Qrow spent the whole time fidgeting and not really paying attention to reading the local news. He answered the phone almost as soon as it began to vibrate.

“Hey, Jimmy!” He crowed.

James laughed down the line. “Hello, Qrow. It’s good to hear from you.”

“Yeah, you too. What the hell are you doing, coming crawling back after three years?”

“Oh, well… I haven’t had-”

“I’m joking.” Qrow chuckled. “But seriously, this is pretty sudden. What’s going on?”

“Well… Would it surprise you to hear that I’m in Vale?”

“What? Yes, that would surprise me, what the fuck are you doing here?”

“I’m on vacation. _Penny_ and I are on vacation.” There was a quiet, high-pitched voice in the background. “She says hello, by the way.”

“Ah, tell her I said hi too.” He paused as James passed the message on. “Vale’s kind of a strange place for you to come on vacation, though, isn’t it?”

“I suppose. But we wanted to see the sea again. It’s been a long time. And I can’t go too far from home in case I’m needed on short notice, so I thought if I came to Vale, maybe we could spend some time together. Like the old days.” He finished endearingly.

Qrow smiled. “Yeah, I’d like that. Although…” He looked down at himself, the bulky gauze still visible under his shirt. “You’d probably have to come to me.”

“Why?” James’ voice became concerned.

“It’s a long story. Where are you at?”

“Oceanview Hotel. Why do you ask?”

“I’m free until the kids get home at five, you’re a five minute drive away. I figure we could talk for a while.”

“The kids?”

“Another long story. I’m taking care of Ruby and Yang.”

“Oh. Well, if you’re sure I can come over-”

“I’m sure. Get your ass to Bayside Apartments, you know where that is, right?”

“I do.” James paused, and a smile became audible in his voice. “That’s an upgrade from the old place.”

Qrow snorted. “Tell me about it. Come on, get over here. Text me when you arrive and I’ll meet you outside.”

“Alright. We’ll come right over. I suppose I’ll see you soon.”

“Yeah, see you in a bit, Jimmy.” Qrow hung up, still smiling. If James was back in Vale, he could take him to The Gold Bar, show him all the best places to eat, the secret stuff that you only learnt about from living here. And maybe Ruby and Yang could meet Penny, if the kid was up for it; she’d be about Ruby’s age, and he was sure they’d get along great. And they had to make the most of the time they had; it was so very scarce these days.

James texted less than ten minutes later, and Qrow didn’t reply before leaving the apartment. Forgetting about saving his energy, he almost bounded down the stairs, flung open the external door and paused in the parking lot. He scanned for a familiar car and spotted the white SUV at the far end of the lot. And there he was: James Ironwood, half-turned away, squinting into the reflection of the orange sun on the sea.

He was five years Qrow’s senior, but barely looked it: they had the same lines around their eyes, though maybe James’ worry lines were deeper. He had greyed a lot since the last time Qrow had seen him, but James had gone in the dignified way, around the temples instead of streaked all over like Qrow. With his blue eyes, high cheekbones, and square jaw, he looked like some sort of statue in the afternoon light.

His build only further accentuated the impression, though in that respect they both looked similar to how they had when they’d met. James was broad shouldered, built muscle seemingly without trying, and stood a couple of inches taller than thin, angular Qrow. While James was strong, assertive, and resourceful, Qrow was nimble, cunning, and charismatic. That was always how it had been.

James turned to see him approaching and smiled wider than Qrow had seen in a long time, eyes crinkling at the corners. He opened his arms and Qrow broke into a jog again for the last few feet, leapt into his embrace like they were both drunk idiot kids again. James held him off the ground for a few seconds, before relenting with a grunt.

“I’m getting too old for that.” He joked.

Qrow stepped back, and grimaced as the pain in his side where James had inadvertently squeezed him flared up again, bending over slightly. “Me too.” He tried to come across light-hearted, but his voice was strained.

“Qrow?” James’ voice became worried, and he reached out towards him. “What happened, did I hurt you?”

“No, don’t worry.” He forced himself upright and took a deep breath. “We can get into that in a minute. I thought you were bringing Penny with you?”

“Ah… She didn’t want to come. Nothing to do with you!” James hurriedly raised his hands in a peaceful gesture. “She does her high school work online now, and she said she wanted to do some. Mostly I think she needed some alone time.”

Qrow nodded, and stepped out of the driveway where he was standing to lean on the hood of James’ car. “I get it. So you’re home-schooling her now?”

“It’s an accredited online high school. It took me months to find one that would work for her. But after the bullying she got in school, it was the best I could do for her.” James joined Qrow, his gloved right prosthetic making a soft clank as it met the hood.

“Thought you were gonna put her in another private school?”

“I did. The place was run by morons.” His voice became bitter. “I had to pull her out four weeks into freshman year. The things the _teachers_ did to her, never mind the students...” He shook his head, his jaw set in anger. “She went to public school for the rest of the semester before we started this online course. She’s much happier now, but… I do wish I could help her make friends. I’m sure she gets lonely.”

Qrow nodded. “Well, if you want, you could bring her to meet Ruby and Yang one of these days. How long are you here?”

“Through next weekend, but we have some things planned.”

“Well, how do you feel about this Sunday? If Penny wants to come, of course.”

“I’ll ask her. She might say no.”

“It’s her choice. But the offer’s there. I know Ruby and Yang will be up for it.”

“I’ll ask.” James repeated. “Anyway, that’s enough about us. I want to know what’s wrong with you.” He pointed to Qrow’s left hand, which was still clinging to the fabric of his shirt over the aching wound.

Qrow sighed deeply. “Short version: I got stabbed.”

“What?” James’ eyes widened, the lines on his forehead deepening. “When?”

“Last Saturday.” He lifted his shirt just enough for the wound dressing to be visible, then dropped the hem. “You want the long version?”

“Yes! Please.”

“Right.” Qrow launched into his trimmed explanation of what had happened almost a week ago, leaving out the bloody details that he knew would make James pale. He watched the colour drain out of his face anyway as he got to his hospital discharge and the fact that there had been no further updates from the cops.

“But… how could that happen… here?” James finally choked out.

“Yeah, it’s the kinda thing that just ‘happens to other people’, right?” Qrow snorted. “Just cause it’s a small town, doesn’t mean it’s a safe haven.”

“No. It doesn’t.” He crossed his arms and looked down at the ground, expression troubled.

“But, hey, I’m doing alright. Mostly. I’m more concerned about Yang and Ruby than myself.”

“How are they doing?”

“Not terrible, but I wouldn’t say fantastic.” Qrow sighed, and half-shrugged. “They’re getting counselling at school, though. It’s not for long, but I think it’ll help them. I’m not here that much to talk to them, so having another adult to help them out can’t hurt.”

“Where are you working these days?”

“Still at the bar. But I’m a manager now, so I get paid better, in exchange for twelve hour shifts.” He shook his head. “I’m the only one who could take them on.”

“And where’s Taiyang for all of this? I thought he was teaching at Signal?”

“Yeah, he was, but now he’s in China teaching English to kids over there.”

“I see.” James looked at the ground again, and Qrow could tell he wanted to make a comment but didn’t dare.

“You leave your kid with a nanny every day, so don’t start.”

“I’m not going to. You’re not wrong. It’s complicated for everyone.” He moved to stare at the expanse of the ocean again. “How are you… holding up, by the way?”

Now it was Qrow’s turn to resist being rude. This was very typical of James, concerned but still restricted by machismo enough that he couldn’t look you in the eye while he asked about your feelings. Dealing with mental health issues of his own but unable, _paralysingly_ unable to bring them up to anyone, even if they might be suffering themselves. But Qrow knew he couldn’t help it; he felt the same himself at times.

“Same as ever, Jimmy.” He finally replied. “It comes and goes. Lately it’s been bad, because of this.” He gestured at his sutured side. “Added a new nightmare to the roster.”

“I’m very sorry to hear that.”

“Save it. What about you, how’s your tin head?” He tapped his own temple for emphasis.

James smirked and shook his head. “Better. Much better, actually.”

“Really? What helped?”

“It was a combination of a lot of things. Mostly, I had my medication adjusted a few times until I found a dosage that worked. And I started seeing a therapist.”

“Therapy?” Qrow looked at him sideways. “Never pegged you as the type.”

“Neither did I, but I was strongly encouraged to give it another chance. The therapist I was referred to is… well, he’s fantastic. I’ll be sad to have to change when…” He trailed off. “Well, one day.”

“You can’t slip one by me that easily. When what?”

“Never you mind.” The smile was back in James’ voice, and Qrow half-heartedly nudged him.

“Asshole.” He muttered. “Well, I’m glad to hear you’re doing better, anyway.”

“Thank you. I hope that… you get here too.”

Qrow looked up at him, and James finally looked him in the eye. He pushed off the car and stood up straight. “Come here, you big idiot.”

James hugged him again, much more gently this time, clearly worried about hurting him. “I’m glad to still be able to call you my friend, Qrow.”

“Yeah, me too.” They broke off, and Qrow took a step back. “So, if Penny wants to come over Sunday, you can show up here… I don’t know, after lunch. Let me know what she says.”

“Alright. Make sure you check with Yang and Ruby, too.”

“I will. Wouldn’t wanna cramp their style.”

James chuckled. “I guess I’d better make sure Penny’s okay. Please take care of yourself.”

“Will do. Back at work on Monday.”

“The grind never stops.” James smiled and briefly grasped his hand. “I’ll see you again before we leave, in any case.”

“Yeah, sure. Good.” Qrow watched as James got into the car. “Drive safe, James!” He called, and walked out of the way. Then he watched and waved as he pulled out of the parking space and drove away.

The time had seemed so short, the conversation not enough: There was so much more he’d wanted to say. But Sunday would come, the kids could amuse themselves, and Qrow would tell James all about his changing life, all about how Ruby and Yang had been since he’d last seen them. And maybe James would tell Qrow about how his work was going and what sort of stuff Penny was into now. There would be some peace in his life, just for a day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah so when I started writing this I thought I'd try to reflect canon events as much as I could, but then Ironwood came onto the scene and I just wanted him and Qrow to get on? So consider the kind of vitriolic relationship they have in the show as how they used to be in the past, and then add twenty years of shared struggles onto that. Also Penny is James' daughter because it was a big thing in the fandom Back In The Day and I miss it and I love Penny and wanted her involved. I have a real soft spot for both of them.


	10. The Owl and The Scorpion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow and Ozpin meet and Qrow's emotions run high. Warnings: Nightmares, trauma

A late summer storm swept through Vale from the hills on Saturday morning, the roar of thunder and flicker of lightning still heavy over the ocean long after the rain had passed. Qrow kept a wary eye on the wind direction as he walked up to the Lookout, a few minutes early in case he’d overestimated his healing. But while he’d still been in pain when James had texted last night to confirm their meeting on Sunday, he’d woken up feeling considerably better. Now he was dwelling on dreams again.

_The scorpion sting under his ribs that knocked him to the ground, the white owl swooping down and plucking the arachnid off him too late, his hands trembling and body convulsing as the venom took hold…_

He shook his head like it would make the memory dissolve. There was no use getting stuck on things he saw in his sleep, but he was sure this was just another expression of his usual nightmare fuel. The day he stopped seeing variations on the knife wound and went back to the almost-comfortable familiarity of his old bad dreams couldn’t come soon enough.

It was a little before ten when he arrived at the Lookout, and Ozpin was already there, sitting on the left side of the rickety wooden bench. He was leaning with both hands on top of his cane, staring out at the thick grey clouds over the roiling ocean. Qrow stood still at the top of the trail and observed him for a silent moment, watching the breeze ruffle his hair the same way it shifted the long grasses around the edge of the small, sandy clearing.

Finally, he collected himself and stepped forward, his footsteps on the gritty rock alerting Ozpin to his presence.

He turned and smiled. “Good morning, Qrow.”

“Hey.” Qrow took a seat beside him on the bench, leaving a few inches gap between them.

“How are you feeling today?”

“Not bad. Not great.” He shrugged. “You?”

“I’m well, thank you. But we aren’t here to talk about me.” He fixed Qrow with a concerned look, and stopped leaning on his cane so he could turn towards him on the bench. “Where would you like to start?”

“I don’t know. Thought you were the trained professional here.”

“True, but that wasn’t the angle I wanted to approach this from.” He clasped his hands in his lap. “I hoped that you could speak to me as a friend.”

Qrow leant back on the bench. “Well, if you were going for friendliness, maybe you should have extended the small talk a little before you dived right in the deep end.”

Ozpin chuckled quietly. “You aren’t afraid to speak your mind, are you Qrow?”

“Nope.” He smirked. “So… what do you want from me? You want me to talk about all the things that have fucked me up in my life?”

“I’d just like you to get the things that are bothering you off your chest.”

“Right.” Qrow ducked his head for a moment, unsure where to start on his current problems when one of the biggest stressors was sitting with his knees just barely touching his own. Lightning flashed over the water again, and he was distracted by it for a second, timing the long pause until thunder finally rolled.

“Maybe it would be best to start from last weekend.” Ozpin prodded gently, gesturing at where Qrow was unconsciously clinging to his shirt over the wound with his left hand.

“I already told you what happened.”

“But you didn’t tell me how it made you feel.”

Qrow sighed. This was starting to seem like stereotypical TV-drama psychology, like he should have been lying down on a black couch while Ozpin jotted notes on a clipboard. He diverted. “I’ve been having nightmares. I always have nightmares, but this is the first new one I’ve had in a while.”

“I see. Is it the same every time?”

“Not exactly. Sometimes it’s closer to the way it happened, sometimes it’s more abstract. Sometimes I just dream that I get hurt in the same area.” He thought of the scorpion from last night, had a split-second vision of the talons of the owl when he blinked. “I think it comes from the pain I get when I’m asleep. My mind’s just filling in a reason for it.”

“That is possible. But it’s very common for trauma to repeat, in flashbacks and in dreams. Have you had flashbacks while you were awake?”

“Not… from this.” Qrow said warily, watching his words.

“You have in the past?”

“Look, Oz, I’m not ready to go back there yet. Let’s stick with the stabbing, shall we?”

Ozpin winced a little at the harshness of his voice, but nodded. “Of course. I’m sorry if that was too far.”

“It doesn’t matter.” There was a long silence punctuated by the incoming tide below.

“Are you afraid?” Ozpin finally asked, tilting his head.

Qrow glanced at him, mildly annoyed by his fretful expression, and shrugged. “Not so much. Not for me, anyway. Maybe for Ruby and Yang.”

“That’s more than sensible. I understand you’re their sole caretaker?”

He nodded. “Yeah, for now. Taiyang, their dad, he’s away in China, he’s teaching there. He’ll be gone until the end of the school year. He’s been gone… barely a month and I’m already overwhelmed.” Qrow looked down at his knees, somewhat surprised at what had just come out of his mouth. “They’re old enough to mostly take care of themselves, but I still feel like… like I’m not doing enough.”

“In what way?”

“I’m out for twelve hours a day, six days a week. I work half the night so I’m barely even awake at the same time as them. And when I am home, I’m…” He trailed off, automatically reaching for his flask at the thought of it and grimacing when he realised he didn’t have it.

Comprehension dawned in Ozpin’s eyes, and he nodded, but didn’t speak.

“If Tai could see me now, he wouldn’t sleep for a week.” Qrow continued. “He… He’s done such a good job raising those girls and now here I am, mostly absent, completely useless. They’ve always been… happy, and well-adjusted, even though they’ve never really been like other kids. Even when things were tough. And I’m worried I’m gonna be the one who ruins their lives, but there’s nothing I can do.”

Emotion overcame him, and his voice cracked on the final word. He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and his hands covering his face, desperately trying to control his shaky breathing. He had never confronted the root of his fear: that Ruby and Yang would one day end up like him. The thought was intolerable, dreadful in its credibility. He didn’t allow himself to sob, but his eyes welled and overflowed with tears that he couldn’t bear to wipe away.

Ozpin’s hand hovered over his shoulder: Qrow could feel the presence, a kind of physical trepidation like the tingle he got at the back of his neck when the barber held the scissors too close. He looked up, saw Ozpin through a watery blur with his hand already half-drawn away.

“May I?” He asked quietly, voice almost drowned out by the waves.

Qrow nodded, and rested his head in his hands again as Ozpin’s cold hand found its mark. He felt the same as he had when he’d clutched his arm the other day: Weak but gratified. As Ozpin slowly, gently, rubbed his shoulder, he had to resist the urge to sit up, initiate and lean into a deeper embrace. Instead, he sat still, focusing on the feeling until the tight, aching knot in his throat relaxed and no more tears fell.

When Qrow sat up, Ozpin was holding out a little travel pack of tissues. He took one and wiped his eyes, tried to hide his face behind it as he felt the hot rush of embarrassment rising there. It was stupid, _exceptionally_ stupid to have allowed his emotions to overtake him in front of someone he barely knew. That irritating notion that he shouldn’t trust him clawed at his skull, waiting to be acknowledged even though Qrow knew it was irrational. But Ozpin’s hand was still on his shoulder, steadying and comforting.

“Okay?” He said softly.

Qrow nodded, then changed his mind. His voice was strained. “Well, no. But I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”

“I understand.” He dropped his hand to rest in his lap again. “Maybe it would be best for us to move on.”

“Yeah.”

They lapsed into silence again. The storm had finally retreated over the horizon, though the clouds and sea were still both a steely grey. A robin sang from somewhere behind them.

“Were you around when Ruby and Yang were very young?” Ozpin asked abruptly.

Qrow looked at him sideways, the way he was squinting over the ocean, the way his hair curled up at the nape of his neck where it met his collar. “Yeah. For a long time Tai and I basically raised them together.”

“What’s your favourite memory of that time? Something that makes you smile?”

He thought hard for a moment, letting his decade-old memories return. There had been so many moments that had shone, times when Qrow had felt bright and alive even after Summer’s death.

_It had only been a few months and he’d been taking care of Ruby and Yang alone. Ruby had gotten a chest full of dress-up clothes for her birthday and decided she was going to host a tea party. Only there was a dress code, and while Yang and Ruby could wear the tiny sparkly dresses from the box, Qrow couldn’t attend unless they found him something nice to wear. Which is how, when Tai had come home from work, Qrow had found himself lying on the floor wearing a sparkly tiara, with a shiny pink cape tied too tightly around his neck, sipping water out of a plastic tea cup. That was the first time he’d seen Tai laugh since the accident._

_Then there had been the time, a couple years later, when Tai had made Qrow put together a cheap flat-pack media unit while he was busy gardening with the girls. He’d spent almost three hours on his knees on the living room floor, cursing up a storm and dropping the screwdriver every five minutes. When he’d finally finished, he’d set it in its place in the room and placed a few books on it to test the shelves, and the whole thing had collapsed. Tai, Ruby, and Yang had walked in to see him face down on the couch, yelling into the cushions, and hadn’t stopped talking about it for weeks._

_There had been plenty of laughter even in the darkness, but that wasn’t all._

Qrow smiled as he collected his thoughts to tell Ozpin what was still his favourite memory from his time in Patch.

“They had a music recital when they were in elementary school. Ruby was five and Yang was seven. It was mostly just singing, you know, a few kids who played instruments, but they were just part of the choir. And they were terrible, obviously; they were real young.” He chuckled. “But they kept grinning and waving at me and Tai in the crowd, they were standing next to each other and they wouldn’t stop nudging each other and pointing, and whispering so loud I could hear them from the back. And when it was over they came _running_ at us, gave this little speech their teachers had taught them about how thankful they were that we came. I was so proud of them. And I was so glad that they were happy to see me, you know? Does that make sense?”

Ozpin smiled fondly and nodded. “It makes perfect sense.” He took a breath as if to say something more, but seemed to change his mind.

“That’s as close as I ever felt to… actually being their parent. I wish I could have stuck around.”

“Why couldn’t you?”

“They started getting picked on at school. Me and Tai showing up to stuff together like that, rumours started flying. There were already issues with bullying, so I decided to get out of the way. Moved here and just visited them in Patch every few weeks.”

“Were you…” Ozpin shook his head hurriedly, frowning. “Sorry, don’t… That was prying.”

“Yeah, it was.” Qrow agreed, but there was humour in his voice: He couldn’t summon any anger at his curiosity. “Another time.”

Ozpin nodded again. “May I give you some advice, Qrow?”

“Go ahead, but I might not take it.”

“And you don’t have to. But, when things get… overwhelming… You could try thinking about your good memories from that time. Remember feeling like their parent. Things, and people, change over time, but family bonds are strong. I’m sure Ruby and Yang still remember how good you were to them, and I’m sure they know how hard you’re trying now.”

“I’m barely their family anymore. I’m not even related to Ruby by blood.”

“Family isn’t all about blood. It’s a bond of unconditional love.” Ozpin made eye contact with Qrow, something knowing in his eyes. “There can be both, but blood alone does not make family.”

Qrow’s mind flashed through images of Raven, his mother, his father. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

The sun broke through the cloud layer suddenly, a ray of light and warmth landing on the Lookout and spreading out over the beach below. Qrow squinted up into it.

“Maybe we should leave it there for today.” Ozpin said.

“Yeah. Yeah, I think so.”

“Oh, but before you go…” He pulled his phone out of his pocket. “I’d like us to stay in touch. Provided you want the same.”

Qrow nodded a bit too enthusiastically and took out his own phone with such force that he almost dropped it. “Yeah, I-I’d like that.” He felt his face reddening again as they exchanged numbers, and ducked away further than necessary when he slid his phone back into his pocket.

Ozpin thanked him and stood up, prompting Qrow to copy, then led him back down the trail that led to the beach parking lot. “When do you return to work?” He asked casually.

“Monday. Soon as the stitches are out. I had to fight for the time off I got.”

“That doesn’t shock me at all.” He shook his head. “Still, I’ll be glad to see you back. I’ve been to the bar every day this week, and I’ll go again today, but… It’s not quite the same without you.”

Qrow jolted slightly, his chest seeming to constrict at the words. When he looked at Ozpin he was smiling, swinging his cane happily.

“I’ve been speaking to An instead. She’s very kind, but I find your company much more stimulating.”

“Uh… Thanks?” Qrow couldn’t think of anything better to say, but his heart was beating harder now as they approached Ozpin’s car and stopped.

“It’s been good to talk to you, Qrow.” Ozpin seemed to bow his head slightly. “Take care, and… remember what I said.”

“I won’t forget.” The words came out intense but honest: the entire conversation was still circling inside his mind.

“Good.” He reached out, but seemed to think better of whatever he’d been planning to do, drawing back before he touched Qrow’s shoulder again.

Qrow found himself unreasonably disappointed by that.

“I’ll see you on Monday. Enjoy your weekend.”

“Thanks. You too.” Qrow took that as his cue to leave, walking away across the parking lot on shaky legs as he heard the car door slam behind him and an engine start. As he crossed the street towards his apartment block, he took a few deep breaths, holding out his hands in front of him and watching them quiver in a way that had nothing to do with trauma. He clenched them into fists and stuffed them into his pockets, but couldn’t suppress a smile. He felt lighter than he had in weeks.

* * *

 

Ruby and Yang both had homework to do that night, Ruby taking the desk in the bedroom while Yang typed an essay on Qrow’s PC in the living room. Qrow, not wanting to inadvertently distract her, picked out a book from the shelf and shut himself in his bedroom with a large whiskey. He sat sideways on the bed with his back against the wall and started reading, but quickly found himself stuck on one paragraph, gaze sliding over the words again and again without the message sinking in.

He dog-eared the book to mark his page and set it down with a sigh. The events of his meeting with Ozpin this morning were still heavy in his thoughts. The hand on his shoulder, the compliments, the sincere, gentle care with which he’d spoken; it was making him feel… hopeful. For exactly what, he wasn’t sure, but he understood the sentiment all too well. Qrow didn’t get much affection, and if it wasn’t from someone he considered family, he didn’t really want it. He didn’t usually crave it from someone he barely knew like this; when he did, it never lasted.

It had been waiting to be recognised for a long time, though, that buoyant, heart-stopping feeling. Like he was standing on a cliff-edge, but if he stepped off, he could walk on air. It almost annoyed him; it seemed like the kind of emotion that he should have left behind in high school, maybe in his early twenties at the latest. Even the word was dumb: _crush_. But he understood it, the sensation of something gripping his insides and squeezing hard. Most of it was joyous, at least to some extent, but there was a part of him that was filled with fear.

_Qrow had known he was bisexual since he was barely a teenager, had fallen headlong into it upon meeting both Taiyang and Summer when he started high school. It had caused him trouble, both among his classmates and his family. Once he’d become an adult and escaped the influence of most of the prejudiced, it had become easier, and he’d grown into himself. Never quite proud, but at least honest. There had been many men, and many women, and they had all been equal._

_Then there had been those few, fleeting, dreamlike months the year after Raven disappeared, he and Tai and Summer all together in whatever ways they felt like. Never discussed, but often expressed in sloppy affection and heavy-handed adoration late at night. He had loved them equally, and for a while they had loved him the same. But over time, they had grown closer, and while they never made Qrow feel unwelcome, he had known it was time to bow out when they started talking about more kids. He had moved out of the house, though it was only a few years before he’d moved back in._

_At first what he and Tai had had was not romantic; there was little space for romance among the choking branches of grief, balancing remembrance with raising two new lives. And even when it had become romantic, it had seemed hollow at first, without her. But time had brought Qrow that feeling, that buoyant hope that had bloomed as he’d watched his best friend slowly begin to grow again. That was the closest he’d ever felt to understanding love the way he saw it in fiction: Something unconditional and all-encompassing and eternal. It had felt so strong._

_But it had been weak enough to be torn apart by a few bullying kids and their apathetic teachers._

_Nothing had felt the same since then. He’d had a few long-term relationships that he’d never been fully invested in, things he’d ended prematurely knowing it was cruel to keep comparing new partners to old friends. Especially when he and Tai were still so close. Mostly he had subsisted on short flings with tourists and temp workers and kept himself busy and drunk to avoid feeling too much. It was easier._

Qrow took a large sip of whiskey, still thinking about Tai. It wasn’t that he still had feelings for him; he had for a while, but over his time in Vale they had receded back into the bounds of friendship. But what he did have was a strong bond with him, something that most people, upon learning he was an ex, would not accept. He knew that was stupid, and deep down maybe he knew that he shouldn’t _want_ to date anyone who wouldn’t like Tai. As he got older, though, he was starting to think that he should take what he could get.

Was Ozpin really ‘what he could get’? Was he actually interested? Qrow was usually good at reading signals; he recognised a friendly smile from a flirtatious one, an accidental touch from one carefully planned to look inadvertent. But Ozpin, with those impassive amber eyes and formal words, was next to impossible to interpret. Qrow felt certain that he was trying to get closer, but to what end, he couldn’t tell. Hell, he wasn’t even sure the man was single; the fact he didn’t wear a ring meant nothing. His gentle touches and out-of-his-way kindness were something Qrow saw as edging towards romantic, but maybe Ozpin was just trying to be a good friend, the way he’d tried so hard and succeeded in becoming a regular at the bar.

And even if whatever this was went in the direction he was hoping, would it be worth it? Would he risk his friendship with someone who so clearly cared about him for a short affair that he would inevitably fuck up? It would be easier, he was sure, to push him away just enough to discourage him, to remain friends and keep some things locked away where they were supposed to be. Where he couldn’t accidentally hurt anyone else.

He was unlucky in love: These things never ended easily, it was always a blowout argument or a nasty comment, or he did something stupid when he was drunk that made them hate him, or they’d just ghost him. Sometimes it didn’t hurt too much, but most of the time there would be a sting that didn’t leave him for weeks, even after just a short relationship. He supposed that was loneliness, at its core.

He felt it again, lying sideways across his bed, slumped against the wall with his hands covering his face. Yes, he was lonely, and it only grew and festered when he was constantly surrounded by people. Sick of replacing warmth in his bed with the burn of whiskey in his chest, sick of waking up clutching the corner of the duvet like it would one day hug him back. No matter what the past held, no matter what from it he was holding onto, he wanted to share the future. Somehow.

It would be easier to push Ozpin away, yes. But he wasn’t going to do that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter made my heart hurt in a really good way reading back on it, hopefully it did yours too! Also yeah I sneaked past poly STQ in here, I'm not sorry.


	11. Cleaning Up the Rust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Penny come to visit Qrow, and bring important news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise if there's any glaring mistakes in this chapter that I missed, I'm really sleep deprived and I'm posting this in between preparation to go out of town for a few days tomorrow. Also, this is the chapter that made me go 'hmm maybe I shouldn't have set this in Oregon when the state capital is called Salem' but it's too late to turn back now!

Qrow was distracted throughout Sunday morning, working on autopilot as he tidied the apartment ready for James and Penny’s visit later. James knew him well, and knew the level of clutter he was comfortable living in, but he still wanted to make a good impression. He made Ruby and Yang tidy their room too, and even gave his own bedroom a cursory clean-up. By the time the place was up to his standards, it was almost lunchtime.

James texted that they were on their way before Qrow had finished eating the hurried sandwich he’d put together, and he rushed to finish it before they arrived. Then he fetched Ruby and Yang to sit in the living room while he went down to the parking lot to see James and Penny in. He took the stairs slowly, still remembering how it had hurt to run down them the other day, and when he opened the door at the bottom, the white SUV was pulling in.

Penny got out first, her coppery hair shining in the sunlight. James quickly followed her, locking the car and guiding her towards Qrow with a hand on her shoulder.

Qrow grinned as James waved and drew closer. “Hey. Right on time.” He turned to Penny. “And look at you, you’ve grown about a foot since I last saw you. How are you doing?”

“Very well, thank you.” Penny smiled, but ducked her head. She was clinging to the strap of her small cross-body bag and twisting it.

James rested his hand on her shoulder again. “She’s just a little nervous. Shall we go in?”

“Oh, yeah, of course.” Qrow unlocked the door again and held it open for them, then led them up the stairs to the third floor. “You two have eaten already, right?”

“Yes, we have.” James answered. “We had fish and chips down by the beach. What was the place called again?”

“The Lighthouse.” Penny put in.

“That’s one of the best places in town for that sort of thing. Good choice.” Qrow nodded.

“Penny chose it. She’s got good taste.”

Penny giggled. “I just looked up the reviews online.”

“Savvy.” They reached the third floor landing and Qrow let them into the apartment, then led them through to the living room.

Ruby was sitting on the couch, her legs tucked under her; she’d already turned on the TV. Yang was sitting on the kitchen counter next to the sink, facing into the living room and hurriedly typing something on her phone. They both looked up as Qrow entered. He restrained a sigh and let James and Penny in.

“Alright, you two have met James before.” He gestured vaguely at the man. “And this is Penny. Penny, these are my nieces, Ruby and Yang.”

“Hi Penny.” Yang waved from the counter.

“Hey, Penny. Do you wanna sit next to me?” Ruby moved her legs from the couch and patted the space next to her gently.

Penny nodded slowly and sat down beside her. “It’s nice to meet you.” She murmured, still not looking at her.

“Yeah, make yourselves at home.” Qrow walked over to the kitchenette, but turned to see James still standing. “That means sit down, Jimmy.”

James seemed to remember himself and sat on Penny’s right, somewhat stiffly.

Qrow noticed he didn’t have his prosthetics covered today; the sleeves of the blue shirt he was wearing unbuttoned over a t-shirt were rolled up to the elbow. “Anyone want coffee?” He asked. Everyone said yes, and he filled the machine and turned it on, then went to sit in the armchair beside the couch while it worked.

“So, Mr Ironwood-” Ruby began, but James chuckled.

“Just call me James, please.”

“Sorry. But, you’re a member of government now! At school we were told you should always treat members of government with respect.”

“Well, I think just calling me by my first name is respectful enough.” James paused. “Besides, your uncle calls me Jimmy and Tin-head, so I think you get a pass.”

Qrow shrugged in what he hoped was an innocuous manner, as Penny, Yang, and Ruby all laughed.

“Anyway,” James continued. “What did you want to ask?”

“Oh, I just wondered where you and Penny lived now. We haven’t seen you in a few years.”

“Ruby, that’s so rude!” Yang laughed again.

“Really? Sorry!” Ruby’s hands went to cover her mouth.

James chuckled. “No, it’s fine. We live on the outskirts of Salem, since that’s where the House of Representatives meets, in the State Capitol.”

“Oh. Okay. You must be busy.”

“Yes, I am.”

Conversation lapsed, and Qrow got up to busy himself making coffee, nudging Yang down from the counter to take James and Penny theirs. When all were handed out, he sat back down in the armchair while Yang pulled out his desk chair and gently span back and forth on it.

“So, Ruby, Yang, how are you two doing?” James asked. “You were both in middle school the last time I saw you. How is high school?”

“It’s pretty good.” Yang replied cheerfully. “Beacon is _so_ much nicer than our old high school, though.”

“Yeah, the teachers there are so kind!” Ruby piped up. “Mostly, anyway. And they have way better elective choices.”

“What electives are you doing? Although, I assume you haven’t chosen yours yet, Ruby.”

“No, but they have a technology centred one where you can learn metalwork and woodwork and sewing and cooking and I really want to do that!” Her eyes lit up with excitement. “It’s so much cooler _doing_ stuff instead of just sitting around writing about it.”

“I agree. What about you, Yang?”

“I’m doing a science elective.” She swung around in the chair to face James. “Basically I want to learn about how the world works, so one day I can go see as much of it as possible. And I figure science is a good starting point for a bunch of stuff.”

“Interesting. Yes, a good grasp on the sciences will help you out with all kinds of majors or jobs. As will the practical skills technology will give you.” He inclined his head to Ruby. “You’ve both made quite mature decisions.”

“See, kid, I told your dad he was crazy.” Qrow nudged Ruby’s knee, and she smiled. He knew she was also remembering Tai’s insistence that tech wouldn’t get her into college; it hadn’t been a fight so much as a drawn-out, repetitive debate, with evidence presented on both sides, that had lasted through the three days before he’d left for China. Qrow had finally told him times had changed, to just let Ruby do what she wanted to do and drop the issue; she wasn’t even choosing until later in the year.

“Hey, Penny.” Ruby tilted her head. “How old are you?”

Penny looked up from where she was staring into her coffee mug. “I’m fifteen.”

“Oh, so you must be a sophomore too! What do you want to do for your elective?”

“Well… My electives are a little different to yours. I do all my schoolwork online.”

“Really? How does that work?” Yang asked.

“It’s just a website I go to. The classes are livestreamed by teachers and there’s work to do based on them. There’s lots of us in a chatroom with the teacher so we can answer questions.” A smile crept across her face. “I have to go to the high school twice a semester so that they can sign a paper to say I did all the classes, and if I do it all the way through, I get a diploma the same as everyone else.”

“Oh. So you’re never face to face with a teacher?”

“No, they’re a long way away. If you get stuck or confused you can ask them questions, but you never have to actually see them. If I need to talk to an adult I can see a counsellor at the high school.”

“So… What _are_ your electives like?” Ruby prompted.

“Oh, right! It’s very exciting. You can build your own!” Penny was becoming more animated. “There’s a big list of different classes you can take, and you choose the ones you like. They want me to finish at least half the year before I decide, though.”

“Do you know what you want to do when you’re older?”

“Not really. Only really what I don’t want to do.” She glanced at her father.

“Can you show us the website?” Yang asked.

“I have it on my phone. Um…” She looked around for a place to sit where both Ruby and Yang could see, floundering for a moment. “Uh…”

“Why don’t we go hang out in our room?” Ruby suggested, standing up. “Then we won’t be in the way.”

“Yeah, let’s give the old men some peace.” Yang teased as she followed.

“Hey!” Qrow grumbled as she walked past. “Don’t call me old.”

James just chuckled and smiled encouragingly at Penny as she accompanied Ruby and Yang out of the room, phone clutched in one hand, half-finished coffee in the other.

Qrow took a deep breath after they were gone and sunk deeper into his chair. “She’s really come out of her shell.” He commented.

“She’s doing much better now she’s out of her mother’s influence.” James replied. “And she really enjoys this online schooling thing. You might be able to tell.” He joked.

Qrow laughed. “Yeah, a little.” He drained the last of his coffee, stood up and stretched, then headed for the liquor cabinet. “You want anything stronger to drink?”

“I drove here, Qrow.”

“Oh. Yeah, right.” He poured himself a whiskey on the rocks, inspecting the level of the bottle. He could feel James’ gaze on the back of his neck. “Another coffee?”

“No, thank you.”

Qrow nodded, put the bottle away, and sat back down in the armchair.

James had spread out a little on the couch, left arm sprawled over the back and legs crossed. “This place _really_ is an upgrade from your last apartment, you know.”

“Tell me about it. It still isn’t as spacious as I’d like, though.”

“It’s a two-bedroom?”

“Yeah. I gave the master to the kids when they moved in, there just wasn’t space for two beds in the guest room. And the kitchen’s too narrow for more than one person to be in comfortably.”

“Well, you’ve done your best with what you have. And anyway, I’m telling you, you should be grateful you’re not still living in that damp one-bedroom you were the last time we met.”

“Ah, you’re right. Black carpet in every room, that what I never got over. Whose idea was that?” He sipped his whiskey. “Yeah, I’ve got a good thing going. And Vale’s not a bad place to live.”

James nodded, then tilted his head. “Can I tell you something, Qrow?”

Qrow quirked an eyebrow. “Go ahead.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything about it this weekend, but Penny’s a terrible liar, I’m sure she’ll tell Ruby and Yang.”

“Alright, get on with it. What’s going on?”

He took a deep breath. “I’m resigning from the House. I’ve got four weeks left to work when I get back.”

Qrow frowned. “You’re quitting? That cushy number? Are you serious?”

“It’s not as comfortable as it used to be. The work doesn’t suit me anymore. I’m stressed all the time, I’m working twelve to fourteen hour days, and frankly I’m getting sick of people commenting on my personal life as though it has any effect on my politics.” He sighed, but smiled. “But I’ve contacted a small, local city council to move back down into their ranks where one of their own is retiring soon. And so it’s very likely that I’ll soon be moving here, to Vale.”

Qrow was speechless for a moment, his eyebrows going up and a grin spreading across his face. He leant forwards. “What? Are you fucking serious right now? You better not be fucking with me, Jimmy, I swear to god.”

“I’m serious. One hundred percent.” James laughed. “We’ve already looked at a few houses, and I’ve scheduled more viewings while we’re here. I’ve been offered a good, steady job that challenges me without overworking me and… well, I’m really looking forward to coming here permanently.”

“James.” Qrow ran a hand through his hair. “That… I mean, that’s amazing, obviously, but… Why didn’t you say something before? Why’s it a big secret?”

“It’s just a precaution. In case it falls through.” He shrugged. “I didn’t want you to be disappointed.”

“Well… shit, even if it does, I’ll be glad you’re doing what’s right for you.”

“Me too.”

There was a short silence, which Qrow broke, still curious. “So Penny’s all on board with this?”

“Oh, absolutely.” He smiled again. “She’s all for it. She always talks about living in a smaller town, where it’s easier to make friends. I hope that she’ll be able to here. She sometimes talks about… not being like other people. I think from her point of view she’s not, and she’s experienced enough bullying to basically confirm it for her. But she needs more friends than the nanny and the kid next door who’s barely in middle school.”

Qrow reached out and patted James’ knee. He knew too well the pain of seeing a child with endless merit treated as if they had none. That child having received the same treatment from adults as well as other kids made his heart ache. “She’ll find friends here.” He promised. “Hell, I’d say she’s already found a couple.”

James glanced towards the living room door and nodded. “I hope so. They seemed a little hesitant, though.”

“Ruby and Yang have got a lot on their plates right now. That’s not gonna stop them treating your kid with kindness.”

“No. No, of course not.” He seemed to shake off his uncertainty. “I just worry.”

“It’s understandable.” Qrow took a large swig of whiskey, and coughed a little. “You’re still kinda paranoid, though.”

“I know.”

James’ face fell, and Qrow regretted bringing it up. Of course James was paranoid of other people’s intentions: How could he not be? He’d had a rough start to work with, losing two limbs to meningitis before his second birthday after not being correctly diagnosed, leading to a lawsuit against the hospital that had lasted years and nearly bankrupted his family before they’d won. Then, at age eighteen, he’d been approached by a group of people he’d called friends, who had chatted for a while and then attacked him, beating him so brutally that a portion of his skull had needed to be puzzled back together with plates and screws.

Half a body made of metal because of other people; anyone would be paranoid.

“Look, Jimmy, I don’t have the same perspective on this as you. I’m not a dad, but I’m as close as I’m ever gonna get right now, so let me give you some advice. You’re free not to take it.” Qrow sipped his drink again and pointed at James. “Your kid isn’t an extension of you. The stuff she wants and the stuff you want won’t always match up, but if you don’t let her take risks now, you’ve really got two options: Either she grows into an adult who’s terrified to do anything risky, or she grows into an adult who doesn’t know how to moderate herself or learn from her mistakes, because she never had chance to try.” He shrugged. “You’ve gotta let her get out there. For her sake and yours.”

James bit his lip and took in his words for a moment. “I understand what you’re saying, but… does that really apply when the ‘risks’ are other people?”

“I’d say it applies even more. Think about it, if you don’t learn at fifteen what it feels like when someone’s taking advantage of you, what do you do when you’re twenty and still too shy to say anything about the guy you’re dating who’s pressuring you into something?”

“Alright, alright.” James frowned and shook his head. “That’s enough. I see what you mean.”

“Sorry. But believe me, it’s something I’ve thought about a lot.” Qrow sighed. “You know, I’ve had this conversation with Tai before, but… He’s always been good about letting Ruby and Yang have just the right amount of freedom. Even when it drove his anxiety through the roof, even when it didn’t _feel_ right, he knew it _was_ right. And now… well, they have their moments, but they’re teenagers. For the most part they’re kind, responsible people who respond well to risk. And I’m sure you can do the same for Penny.”

“You have a lot of faith in me.” James said, and managed a smile. “Thank you, Qrow. Sometimes I… well, I need someone to kick my ass back to reality.”

“We all do.” Qrow momentarily raised his glass in a vague sort of toast. “Hey, when you move here you’ll have an endless source of annoying, mistimed advice.”

“ _If_ I move here.” He corrected, but he was still smiling. “And it wasn’t mistimed. I’m grateful for it.”

There was a loud peal of laughter through the wall, three voices all raised for a second.

“I didn’t realise how loud kids were until Ruby and Yang moved in.” Qrow grumbled.

“Oh, let them be. They’re having fun.” James nudged him with his foot. “Don’t you remember being young?”

“I wish I didn’t.” He shrugged. “I wasn’t exactly like other kids, was I?”

“Well, no. But I remember what you were like in college.”

“Yeah, a prime example of what happens if you don’t let your kid take risks and they go the out-of-control route.” He deflected, jokingly wagging a finger. “There’s a life lesson for you.”

James smirked, his voice going sarcastically insulting. “Oh, _no_. I wouldn’t want Penny ending up like _you_.”

* * *

 

Qrow eventually had to fetch the girls from the bedroom, where they were still giggling at three-thirty; James had another house viewing booked for four. They stood on the threshold of the apartment as they said their goodbyes, Penny exchanging phone numbers with Ruby and Yang.

Qrow nodded smugly at James, who smiled and shook his head, conceding.

“It’s been great to see you, Qrow. I’m not sure I’ll have time to stop in again before we go, but-”

“I don’t think that really matters anymore.” He smirked. “You enjoy the rest of your vacation. We aren’t going anywhere.”

“Of course.”

“What’s the, uh… timeline?”

James understood what he was asking instantly. “December. I’ll let you know.”

“Good man.” Qrow stepped forward to hug him, feeling the cold weight of James’ right arm at his lower back.

When they broke off, James peered around at Penny, still quietly chattering to Ruby and Yang. “Penny? Are you ready to go?”

“Oh!” She turned around, surprised. “Um, almost.” She hugged Yang first, then Ruby, who whispered something in her ear that made her giggle again.

Qrow shot a glance at James, who was wearing a wide-eyed, puzzled expression. Penny was not usually fond of hugging anyone she didn’t know.

The two girls finally let go of each other, and Ruby smiled widely. “Bye, Penny.”

“Hopefully we’ll see you again soon.” Yang winked.

“I hope so too.” Penny turned to follow her father, smiling brightly with her face pink under her freckles. “Goodbye, everyone!”

“See you again, Penny.” Qrow held the door open and watched as James held up a hand in a final goodbye, then listened as they descended the stairs until the main door slammed shut.

As soon as the apartment door closed, Yang was clinging to both his arms. “Did he tell you?” She demanded.

“Tell me what?” Qrow smirked.

“That they’re coming back!”

“Yep.” He grinned and led them back into the living room.

“That’s so cool!” Ruby squeaked, bouncing on the balls of her feet. “And Penny’s so nice-”

“She’s super smart, too.” Yang piped up. “Her online classes must put her really far ahead of most kids-”

“And she’s interesting-”

“She’s really funny-”

“Oh and did you see the little bow in her hair? She’s so cute!”

Qrow couldn’t restrain his smile as he sat down and listened to them gush over their new friend. Vale was going to be perfect for Penny and James.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I mentioned, I'm going out of town over the weekend, so chapter 12 is gonna be a little late! I thought I could schedule it to post on Saturday but apparently not? Or I'm dumb and can't figure it out. Anyway, chapter 12 will be up on Monday and then we'll get back on the normal schedule on Wednesday. Hopefully you enjoyed this one and don't mind a little extra wait!


	12. Rue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow gets his stitches out, and finds trouble waiting for him at work. Warnings: minor injury description

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I'm back! Somehow this chapter ended up being even later than I'd anticipated, and also is a little shorter than usual. Which is unfortunate. BUT I'm jumping right back in, re-energised and ready to go. Enjoy!

Monday dawned clear and cool, and Qrow dragged himself out of bed at seven-thirty in preparation for his stitches being removed at nine. The most acute of the pain was receding, a sharp sting now reduced to a dull ache that twinged if he moved too ambitiously. It still itched, and he suspected it would only get worse when the fresh pin-prick wounds of the stitches were opened, but that meant it was healing. He was finally starting to feel a little better.

When he had seen Ruby and Yang out of the apartment for school, he got into his truck for the first time in over a week, turning the engine over a few times before it would start. The beachside road up to the hospital seemed to toss the memory of a dream into his face, sudden like the shock of cold water.

_A beach that wasn’t Vale’s, clouds like blue-tinted steel heavy overhead. A storm blew in with such voracity it lifted sand off the ground, ripped planes out of the sky, made waves that were three times Qrow’s height and crashed ashore with a sound like glass breaking. He ran, through an unfamiliar town that was entirely deserted, to a train station so packed with people he could barely move._

_The last train of the day was on its way; he didn’t know where it would go, just that he had to get on it. He ran through the station, over platforms, up and down stairs that seemed to lead in circles, pushing past those who wouldn’t move. The train pulled up just as he reached it, its interior deserted apart from one person. A small woman with short, reddish hair that fell over her eyes, cloaked in white. She met his eye. Her hood came off and half her face was missing._

Qrow curled his lip and gritted his teeth as he pulled into the hospital parking lot. It had been a while since he’d dreamt of her so directly, even longer since the sight of her hadn’t pulled him from sleep right away. There was more to the dream, but he couldn’t remember it past a few snippets: people crushing onto the train, falling in the aisle. Maybe he had met her. More likely she’d disappeared. She always did.

The procedure to remove his sutures went faster than his time in the waiting room, a nurse making deft, delicate work of them. He had taken painkillers pre-emptively, and while the pulling stung a little, it was nothing he couldn’t handle. It was barely nine-thirty by the time he was out of the building, and he felt well enough to drive to the grocery store and restock his kitchen before heading home to rest before work.

* * *

 

Salem had sent him the schedule for the week: His name was on it in most of its usual places, almost all of the 2 pm to 2 am shifts. There was a day shift marked for him on Thursday, but he could live with that, even though it meant he’d get very little sleep on Wednesday night. He was oddly excited to get back to it; the whole week sitting around doing nothing may have been good for him, but he had sorely missed the routine and busy mind that his work afforded him.

He went to fill up his flask before he set off, but couldn’t find it; it wasn’t in the liquor cabinet, or on the drying rack where he usually kept it when it was rarely not in use. Now that he thought about it, he hadn’t seen it all week, and he cursed to himself. The last place he remembered having it was the bar last Saturday. Chances were he’d dropped it whilst fighting Tyrian, or it had been lost or disposed of in the hospital when they’d taken his belongings. He sighed, and sipped some whiskey from the bottle; he would have to buy beers from the bar today. At least it would slow him down.

Salem was waiting when he walked in the front door of The Gold Bar, supervising An behind the counter. She watched as he entered, sanguine stare seeming to run through him. He sauntered up to her without breaking stride, even though he wanted to. She was intimidating, deathly pale with hair barely a shade darker, always pinned in a complex up-do with little trailing ringlets that made her look like a horror movie doll. Her long fingernails were painted black, and she tapped them on the counter with languid superiority as he approached.

“Welcome back.” She said simply. “How was your little holiday?”

Qrow set his jaw. “Painful.” He spat.

“Well, we’re all glad to see you back.” She smiled, thin and insincere. “You’ve seen the schedule for this week, I take it?”

“I’m here, aren’t I? What’s with the day shift on Thursday?”

“Some associates of mine are visiting that evening. I’ll be taking the night shift.”

Qrow narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “Right.”

Salem exited the area behind the bar, but he stopped her before she could disappear into the office or go home.

“Hey, you need to add someone else to the list of banned customers.” He demanded.

She tilted her head. “Why?”

“Because I got stabbed by a guy named Tyrian, and I don’t want him back here.” His voice became low and harsh.

“Tyrian?” Salem shook her head. “You’re clearly mistaken. I won’t do that.”

“What? Are you…” He cut himself off before he could curse her out, and started over. “We banned Roman Torchwick for change scamming but you won’t ban the guy who nearly killed an employee?”

“We had Torchwick on camera. There’s no evidence Tyrian was the one who attacked you.”

“He told me his name!” Qrow gestured wildly. “He came in here with Cinder and she called him by the same name! It sounds to me like you’re-”

“Enough.” She interrupted. Her voice wasn’t loud, but it was hard enough that several nearby customers turned to look. “Tyrian is… a friend of mine. There is no evidence on our security cameras that he was ever here, let alone that he _attacked_ you. So I suggest, if you’d like to keep your job, that you get on and do it.” She extended a hand towards the bar, glared at him for a second, then turned on her heel and walked away.

Qrow ran a hand through his hair, brushing his bangs away from his eyes, and got behind the bar, where An was cleaning the space in preparation to leave.

“Afternoon.” He mumbled.

An smiled at him. “It sounds like she’s back to valuing profit over people again, doesn’t it?” She sighed, her face falling. “I was hopeful that she’d change.”

“She’ll never change.” Qrow shook his head.

“I just don’t understand why she dislikes you so much.”

“Because I don’t just bow to her.” He glanced at An, then raised his hands. “No offence. I understand why you do it.”

An shook her head. “I can’t risk losing this job.”

“I know.”

She picked up her handbag from beneath the counter, ready to leave, but stopped, placing a hand on Qrow’s arm. “Before I go… look on the second shelf down there.”

He frowned, confused, but did as she asked, crouching where the mugs were stacked just under the bar. At first he couldn’t see what she was talking about, but then his eyes alighted on the out-of-place shape. His flask was propped on its side at the back of the shelf, tucked behind the mugs. He pulled it out and turned to thank her, but she spoke before he could:

“I found it last Monday. I don’t know if Salem saw it before I could hide it, but her attitude suggests she did. You need to keep it out of sight while she’s around.”

“An-”

“Don’t mention it.” She smiled again, a little wearily. “I don’t want you to lose your job any more than you do.”

With that, she slung her bag over her shoulder and left before Qrow could reply. He stood up from behind the bar, slowly so as not to aggravate his freshly-unstitched wound, and stashed the flask mostly out of sight but within reach. Then he leaned over the counter, chin in his hand, scowling. Salem’s dismissal preyed on his mind; it was bad enough that she wouldn’t believe he knew who had attacked him, worse that she was still willing to call him a friend to his face. It was almost an admittance that she didn’t care, served with that smirk because she knew he couldn’t do anything about it. And now it seemed she knew about his drinking, which put him at risk and An in danger of having to take on his seventy-two hour work week.

But that was what being a drunk got him, didn’t it? Affecting every life around him, whether they really recognised the reason or not. But An sure as hell recognised the reason. He wondered if she felt bitter for the time she’d lost in the past week: how many extra hours she could have slept, or relaxed, or spent with her son, had Qrow not been hurt. Even if she had, she’d shown him kindness without lecturing or judging him. It was more than he felt he deserved.

* * *

 

He was miserable for the next couple of hours, quiet and lethargic as he took orders and filled them with systematic apathy. It was hard to keep the customer-service smile on his face, even as he served Ghira and Kali Belladonna tea, even as Winter quipped rudely at him from the kitchen and he slung an insult back. He didn’t have much of a life outside of work. If he lost this job he’d lose friends, his routine, his structure, his reason. Not to mention his income; a few years ago he might have survived on his savings for a month or so, but he couldn’t do that to Yang and Ruby.

Ozpin’s arrival at four was a welcome distraction, and Qrow immediately found it a little easier to smile as he approached the bar. They didn’t exchange any words at first, just cocoa and cash, and Qrow had to take a moment to serve another customer immediately after. When they had gone to sit down, he turned back to Ozpin with a sigh that seemed to make him wilt.

“How are you feeling, Qrow?” He asked quietly.

Qrow took a moment to find the right words. “Could be better.” He settled.

Ozpin nodded. “Would you like to talk about it?”

“Not here. Salem’s around.”

“Again? She’s been here for the past week.” His eyes narrowed.

“Covering for me. She’s not… I don’t know, rude to you, is she?”

“I wouldn’t say she’s polite, but she seems to prefer pretending I don’t exist, which is somewhat inconvenient when she’s the only one at the bar. Thankfully An was usually here to help.”

Qrow snorted. “Figures.”

“I’m glad to see you back here, in any case. How did the removal of your stitches go?”

He floundered for a moment, the compliment seeming so big in his head that he barely registered the other words. “Uh, fine. Well, great, actually. It’s healing well, even the nurse was impressed.”

“Good. I’m very pleased to hear that.” Ozpin smiled. “You’ve displayed remarkable fortitude in getting through this.”

Qrow could feel his face getting red again, but resisted the urge to turn away. “Nah, that’s just stubbornness.” He joked, then deflected. “Anyway, that’s enough talk about me. How’s your day been?”

“Up and down.” Ozpin shrugged, fiddling with the button on his shirt cuff. “I had a meeting with the parents of another child whom Whitley Schnee has hurt, followed by the joy of Jacques Schnee bursting into my office at the news that Whitley was to be suspended.” He sighed. “I’ve found it’s a very complex situation. I worry that Jacques will take out his temper on Whitley once he comes to terms with the facts of what he’s done. At the same time, I think Whitley gets more freedom than his sisters did or do.”

“Yeah, I believe that.” Qrow glanced at the kitchen hatch. Winter had told him endless stories of living with her father, up to and including calls to child protective services that never went anywhere. He hadn’t met Jacques, but from that and the other stories he’d heard, the man was a master manipulator, and a misogynist to boot.

“On a happier note,” Ozpin continued. “I saw Weiss and Ruby studying together in the library as I passed. I think Weiss has finally warmed to her.”

“Really?” Qrow smiled, thinking about how happy Ruby would be. “That’s good to hear.”

“I’m told that they’re getting on well in class now, too. I look forward to seeing how their project turns out.”

“Yeah, me too.” He paused. “How’s your son doing, by the way? Oscar?”

“Well enough.” Ozpin’s smile grew a little sad. “Much better now that Whitley isn’t around. He seems to be struggling to make friends, though.”

“Maybe you could introduce him to Ruby.” Qrow said before he could think. “I mean, she’ll take to anyone, she’s the friendliest kid I know. Oscar might get on with her.”

“That is something to think about. But Oscar’s… resistant to the idea of his father helping him out.” He sighed. “He’s signed up for a few extra-curricular activities; I’m hoping he’ll make friends there. I don’t want to butt in where he’d rather I didn’t.”

“Yeah. From what I can tell, every kid goes through that at some point. Not wanting to be near their parents, I mean. They’ll come around. Yang… well, her mom left when she was really young, so she’s an unusual case, but for a few months when she was fifteen, she didn’t want anything to do with her dad either. Locked herself in her room, wouldn’t listen to him, didn’t want his help even when she needed it. Eventually it got too much, she let him in again, and now they’re closer than ever.” He shrugged. “Just gotta give them time and space.”

Ozpin looked at him silently for what felt like a minute, but was just a few seconds. “You’re probably right. He needs independence.”

“Exactly. And listen, Oz, if the worst he’s got to worry about is some snobby kid pushing him around at school, you’re doing a pretty okay job.”

“Thank you, Qrow.”

Ozpin stayed for longer than he usually did on a weekday, hovering at the bar until almost five as Qrow regaled him with the saga of his old friend moving back into town, followed by stories of their escapades in younger years. For his part, Ozpin told some much tamer tales about his own college career, involving stolen houseplants and a friend who had scaled the sheer concrete walls of a dorm building when she’d forgotten her keys. It was nice to speak to him jovially, and Qrow found his enthusiasm coming back even as he paused to take orders from other customers.

Finally, Oz stood up and glanced out the front window at the rain starting to fall outside. “It looks like I’m going to get a second shower today.” He commented drily. “But I have to go, Oscar will already be home before me.”

“Yeah, of course.” Qrow leaned over the bar slightly, bracing his hands flat on the surface. “Have a good evening.”

“And you.” Ozpin placed his own hand over Qrow’s for a moment. “It was nice to talk to you.”

He was gone before Qrow had recovered himself enough to reply, his heart beating hard and a dopey smile frozen on his face. It felt like there should be a red handprint on the back of his own with how hot it was burning, like Oz had absorbed all the warmth from his drink and fed it back into Qrow in a second. Eventually, he peeled himself off the counter and turned away from the room. A grin crept over his face as he ducked his head, his bangs falling into his eyes again. It felt silly, to be so thankful for so little, and it may have been meaningless. But he didn’t care; it felt good to allow himself to be happy.

And if that was childish, so be it.


	13. The Past as Temporary Accommodation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow helps Ruby deal with a problem he inadvertently caused. The past comes up to meet him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I made a small mistake with the project discussed in this chapter and the next few: Apparently in the USA social studies is more like history than anything? Whereas I assumed it was more like sociology or communications/culture. A project about your life experiences and how they affected your opportunities probably doesn't make much sense in a social studies class, so I guess just pretend it does? It's a pretty small detail in the grand scheme of things, hopefully it doesn't matter much!

Qrow’s good mood kept his head above water for two days, before Thursday’s day shift swiftly pushed him under. He arrived at the bar at 9 am having slept for less than five hours, hungover from the night before, and feeling dour. Even Ozpin’s visit at four didn’t help, especially not the expression of concern that, in his vulnerable state, Qrow interpreted as self-righteous. The appearance of Cinder and the moustached man he’d seen her with before as he was leaving only served to further irritate him. By the time he got home, he wanted nothing more than a large meal, a stiff drink, and to go to bed.

He cooked rice and beans, too lazy to make any real effort, and ate between sips from a generous glass of whiskey that felt like home after a day of cheap vodka. Once he had finished and was loading the dishwasher, his anger had settled back into exhaustion, that dull kind of misery that seemed to put a sepia filter over everything. His life was a mess, he wasn’t important to the world, he would have nightmares tonight, and tomorrow would be just the same as today.

There was a clatter from across the hallway.

The apartment had been quiet when he’d walked in, and he’d assumed Ruby and Yang were in their room, doing homework or something. He’d assumed the door that he’d heard opening and closing whilst he was eating had been one of them going to the bathroom. But the noise had come from his own bedroom, and while he’d never explicitly banned them from entering, he always kept the door shut in a pretty clear sign that it was off-limits.

He walked across the hallway quietly and opened the door slowly, trying to catch whichever kid it was in the act. The light was on, and as the room came into view he saw Ruby, kneeling on the floor in front of his bed. There was a stack of photo frames on the floor next to her, fanned out where they had toppled from a neat stack. As he watched, she pulled out a shoebox from under the bed and placed it on top of the mattress to open it.

“What are you doing?” Qrow asked.

Ruby jumped, dropping the lid back onto the box, and turned to look at him with wide eyes. She didn’t reply.

“I asked you a question.” He couldn’t stop the anger bubbling into his tone.

“I…”

“You can’t just go snooping around in my stuff! What are you looking for?”

Her face crumpled, and she began to cry, sobbing hard as she buried her face in her hands.

Qrow’s rage evaporated, and he hesitated for a moment before he crouched to her level. “Hey. Come here.” He grasped her upper arm, not to pull her up but to guide her as she stood by herself, never moving her hands from her face. Then he steered her to sit on the bed, pushing the shoebox aside to sit beside her.

“I need help.” She finally said between sobs, muffled in her hands.

“Okay. What do you need help with?” Qrow asked calmly.

She couldn’t reply for a moment, and Qrow just kept his hand on her shoulder, remembering how comforting it had been when Ozpin had done the same to him. That seemed like a lifetime ago. Ruby sobbed and coughed and sniffled as his mind wandered, as he watched her but stared through her. Everything seemed to be collapsing around all of them.

Finally, her tears mostly abated, Ruby spoke, voice high and tight. “I did something really stupid.”

Qrow’s stomach contracted, thoughts of all the dumb shit he’d done at fifteen heavy in his mind. “Stupid how?”

She sniffed. “We’re doing our social studies group projects about personal experiences and how they changed us so I did my part about Mom and Dad and what it’s like to not have your parents around, but Mr Port told us we’d get extra credit for bringing evidence like photos and letters and I _promised_ Weiss I would, but I don’t have a photo of Mom.” Her voice cracked again.

“It’s alright, it’s alright.” He soothed, and pulled her into a hug. “Ruby, why didn’t you just ask me?”

“You’re never here!” She squeaked into his shoulder. “We’re presenting tomorrow, _and_ Professor Ozpin’s observing our class! And Dad said you used to keep most of the photos under your bed; I just wanted to see if you still did.”

Tears pricked at Qrow’s eyes now, but he held them in, blinking rapidly. This was his own damn fault; he should have known. He let go of her and sat back. “You’ve gotta communicate with me, kid. You could have texted me at work, I’d have just told you to take a look. It’s the not knowing that I don’t like. Just tell me about stuff. Please.”

She nodded, looking down. “I’m sorry.”

He wanted to say it was fine, but knew that it wasn’t. Instead, he stood up. “I’m gonna get you a glass of water and a tissue. You stay here, pick up those frames from the floor for me.”

Ruby nodded, and he walked back to the kitchen, his head feeling stuffy.

He still wanted to cry, but he wouldn’t, not in front of her, preferably not ever. It had been shocking enough to see her break down so quickly; she would likely struggle if roles were reversed. He was mad at himself for losing his temper again, he’d made her cry out of guilt on top of all her other stress. It was messy, but now he would sit down and find her a photo of Summer to take to class. He didn’t want to, but he was going to; who else would?

_Tai had asked him to take most of the photos away. After Summer’s death he’d barely been able to look at them without crumbling. First it had been all the framed ones that hung on the wall, then the smaller ones on the shelves, then the albums, then the sleeves hidden away in the box of stuff left over from their teenage years. Qrow had taken everything he’d been asked to take, stacked the bigger frames under the bed, taken the standard sized photos from their frames and albums and carefully fitted them into a shoebox that was the perfect width for them to stand in._

_There were other photos in the mix: Some of Raven and Qrow from their childhood, others of Raven and Tai that Tai had been planning to burn. Some of the girls that Tai had copied for him. A lot of himself, Raven, Tai, and Summer in their schooldays and early twenties before any of them had settled down. All unordered, but at least neat and safe. He would get the box out and look at his favourites at least once a year, usually on the anniversary of Summer’s death. It didn’t ease the pain so much as sharpen it into something that felt real, instead of the usual dull ache._

He took Ruby a wad of tissues and a glass of water, which he placed on the nightstand. As she blew her nose, he sat down on the other side of the collection of frames she’d placed on the edge of the bed. There were five, all once displayed around the house in Patch, and he pulled them closer to look. There was one of Tai and Raven underexposed against a sunny backdrop; one of Summer, Tai, and Yang; two of Summer, Tai, and both girls; and one of Qrow, Summer, and Tai all sitting on the railing of a bridge over a forest creek.

“What kind of photo do you need?” He asked, turning the last one over so he couldn’t stare at it. “Just your mom, or your dad too? Maybe you could throw me in for free.” He tried to lighten the mood.

Ruby perked up slightly. “Actually, it’d be good to have you in there too. So people know that not having your parents doesn’t mean you don’t have a family.”

Qrow’s heart swelled, and he smiled through the lump in his throat. “Alright. I’ve got a few of the three of us at various ages and levels of attractiveness.”

“Okay. Let’s take a look.” She removed the lid from the shoebox again, and seemed to reel at the number of photos inside. “Wow. How many are there?”

“Few hundred. There’s a few duplicates, but there was a time when we were taking photos nearly every day. And there’s some inappropriate ones that I shouldn’t show you, too, so don’t get nosy.”

“Oh, gross!” Ruby covered her eyes.

“Not that kind of inappropriate.” He shook his head, but smirked. “Just stupid kid stuff we did. I don’t want you getting ideas, that’s all.”

She uncovered her eyes but still looked dubious, watching as Qrow flicked through the photos, careful not to mark them.

He plucked a couple out as he passed them, occasionally catching a silver eye from a close up photo, flicking past the one of he and Summer kissing before Ruby could catch sight of it. She didn’t need to know about things that happened before she was even a notion. He had never wished he’d organised the box before, but as he quickly flipped through embarrassing images of his fifteen year old self, he thought it would have saved him some trouble.

“Wait, what was that one?” Ruby pointed at the box.

“Which one? Describe it.”

“I don’t know, I just caught a glimpse. It looked like you and Dad, and two other people?”

Qrow pulled a few photos back the other way and quickly found the one she was talking about. He took it out and held it up so they could both see it. It showed all four of them: Summer, Tai, Raven, and himself, standing under a tree on the grounds of Beacon High School. They were at the end of the junior year, all seventeen and far too confident for their innocent, fresh-faced appearances. Summer looked the youngest, wearing a flouncy skirt and a hoodie so big the sleeves covered her hands. Tai looked youthful too, skinny with his hair ruffled and blonder than it was now. Qrow and Raven hadn’t changed as much, both a little shorter, a little leaner, with scruffier clothes. They were all smiling except Qrow.

“Oh.” Ruby breathed. “Dad has this one framed!” She reached out for it and Qrow handed it over. “He keeps it in the living room. It’s the only one I ever see.”

Qrow sighed. “Yeah. He always really liked that one.”

“You can’t really see Mom’s face in it, though.” It was true; Summer’s overlarge hood drooped over her eye, and combined with the way she was standing, it was hard to see much of her.

“Yeah. Keep hold of that one for a bit.” He went back to searching the box, and finally came up with six photos that suited what Ruby was looking for. As an afterthought, he picked up a Polaroid that was tucked down the side of the box, too. “Alright, this is probably enough for now. Tell me what you think.”

He started to lay the photos out on the bedspread one at a time, tucking the tiny Polaroid into his hand and hiding it. All of the photos were ones he loved, some very old, others more recent.

The first was one he had two copies of, one he had taken himself on the Fourth of July just after Summer had learned she was pregnant. She and Tai stood in front of the fireworks, hand in hand, lit strangely from every direction and with smiles that could have set the grass aflame. It was pretty, with sparks of red and blue in the background, but the odd shadows made it hard to see either face.

“Hmm. Maybe?” Ruby said, in a tone that meant no.

“Okay, okay. The next one you might not want to show to your teachers, but it’s worth a look.”

He laid down the second photo, taken when Tai and Qrow had been in college together and Summer had visited them just before spring break. He couldn’t remember whose house the party had been in, but they were in the kitchen, Summer between Qrow and Tai with her arms around their waists, laughing. Qrow’s expression was confused, his eyes slightly glazed, no doubt a result of the cup of livid-coloured alcohol in his hand.

“That’s not that bad.” Ruby insisted. “Oh, but look how young you were!” She took the photo and looked at it closer. “Wow, Mom looked… Just like me. How old were you all?”

“Eighteen, nineteen.” Qrow waved a hand vaguely in the air. “Too young to be that drunk, that’s for sure.”

She laughed. “You can’t tell in the photo.”

“ _You_ can’t.” He quipped, but set down the next photograph for her to see. “This one’s just your mom and dad. And you. Your first photo.”

The photo had been taken soon after Ruby’s birth, presumably by Summer’s mom. Summer was lying in a hospital bed, looking exhausted and sweaty but radiantly happy with little Ruby on her chest. Tai was crouching alongside the bed, not looking at the camera, too entranced with his sleeping daughter.

“Is that really me?” Ruby gently poked her own chubby cheek, leaving a fingerprint on the photo. “Why doesn’t Dad have this one?”

“He asked me to replace it in your baby book.” Qrow handed it to her. “With one that was just of you in your crib. He didn’t like… seeing her in a hospital bed.”

Ruby’s expression grew downturned, and she put the picture aside without looking at it further.

The fourth photo showed Qrow and Summer, aged twenty-one in the living room of the apartment that she and Raven had been sharing at the time. Summer was riding on his back, caught mid-whoop of joy by the camera flash, with one hand braced against the ceiling and one gripping Qrow’s shirt at his neck. He was laughing so hard his eyes were closed, anxiety betrayed by the creases he was clinging into her jeans as he held her up.

“This is the day I almost cracked your mom’s head against the roof.” Qrow joked.

“Where were you?” Ruby asked. “It looks kinda like this place.”

“It’s another apartment building here in Vale, that’s why. It’s where your mom and Yang’s mom lived at the time. Awful landlord; tried to evict them for no good reason.” He sensed he was getting distracted. “Anyway, if you wanna take this one, I’ll find you a photo of your dad to go with it.”

“Well… I don’t know, I kind of want one with you all together. Or at least Mom and Dad.”

“Alright, I can do that.” He threw down the penultimate photo. “How’s this?”

It was another photo of the four of them from not long after the last, not long after Tai and Raven had started dating. They stood on the left of the frame, arms around each other, Raven squeezing him tightly. On the right, Summer and Qrow were in a similar position, her head leaning into his chest, his face flushed. They were all dressed in winter clothing, in amongst the trees that surrounded Patch where they had been for a long walk, and asked a stranger to take their picture.

“Oh. That one’s nice.” Ruby picked it up and her smile faded. “But Dad’s with Raven.”

Qrow nodded. “Yeah. This was a long time ago.”

“I don’t know if I wanna have to explain who she is. Especially when I only met her once.”

“Yeah, I get that. You don’t have to take this one if you don’t want it.”

She shrugged. “Mom and Dad aren’t even together. What’s the next one?”

“This is the last one.” He laid it out in front of her. “There’s copies of this one everywhere, I know your dad kept one or two even if he won’t admit it.”

It was a simple picture, staged ahead of time unlike most of the others, taken in some superstore against the classic mottled blue backdrop. Summer and Tai sat in two chairs, dressed smartly, with Yang grinning widely from Summer’s lap and Ruby beaming from her father’s arms. Qrow stood behind them, a hand on Tai’s right shoulder and Summer’s left. It had come out so well they’d ordered it in several different sizes, and it had been framed, stuck in photo albums, and even pinned to the inside of Tai’s wardrobe so that he saw it every day.

“This is perfect!” Ruby crowed, her hands going to her face in excitement. Her earlier tears seemed to have mostly been forgotten. “Why didn’t you show me this one first?”

“Well, I don’t know what you want, do I?” Qrow grumbled, but smiled and pushed it towards her. “You can keep that one, if you like. Between me and Tai we’ve probably got ten copies.”

“We all look so happy.” She ran her thumb over the impression of her mother’s face. “I’m gonna take this one. I’d love to see the rest of this stuff one day, though.”

“One day, once I’ve sorted it.” He nodded.

“Do you have anything else? I know it’s a lot to ask, but… any diaries, or letters, or something?”

Qrow shook his head. “There’s a few of your mom’s diaries around, but your dad keeps them in storage with his own. If there’s any letters I haven’t seen them.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“I do have some notes from when we were in high school, somewhere around here.” He looked around the room, trying to remember where he’d put them. They were probably stuffed onto the bookshelf somewhere. “But they’re mostly just us cursing and talking about all the juvenile delinquency we were gonna get up to after school.”

Ruby tilted her head, eyes narrowed. “Were you really that bad?”

“We were definitely troublemakers, yeah. In fact, I’d say we were notorious.” He smirked, remembering the whispers that had followed them in the halls by senior year. “Yang’s mom and I were kinda raised as hellions. Your dad was pretty keen to get involved. Your mom was the one who reined us in when we got too crazy. And she’d cover for us if we got caught, too, she could put on this innocent straight face that everyone fell for.”

“It sounds like you guys would have got on with Yang’s friend Sun.” She smiled, and looked down at the photo again. “Mom sounds like she was cool. I wish I’d known her.”

“Hey, we were _all_ cool. But she was probably the coolest.” Qrow nodded. “And I wish you had, too. I wish we could all still know her.”

There was a long silence, and he remembered those notes, all the torn squares of lined paper creased and fragile from years of folding and unfolding. The different handwriting all grouped together in lines and then in bubbles in the margin when space had run out. Summer’s neat cursive and tiny doodles, Tai’s spiky script next to the similar scruffy penmanship of the twins: Raven’s more rounded, Qrow’s narrow and slanted to the left.

“Is that all you need, then? You’re not gonna get yelled at for not having a letter?” He finally asked.

“No, just the photo’s fine. Better than fine, it’s great!”

“Good. Help me put these away, then, will you?”

Ruby sat on the floor again to stack the frames under the bed, while Qrow hid his Polaroid in his shirt pocket and slid the disused photographs back into the box. As he put the lid on and put it back where it belonged, Ruby picked up her glass of water and went to leave.

“I’m gonna go put this in with my school stuff so I don’t forget it.” She said, then paused for a moment. “Thanks for helping me out even though I was snooping.”

“It’s alright. Remember what I said, though. Talk to me.”

She nodded.

“Your presentation’s gonna go great, so don’t worry about it. Get plenty of sleep so you’re ready. And if anyone gets mad at you for ‘not doing enough’ or whatever, let me know. I’ll deal with it.”

“I will.”

“Oh, and send your sister in here, would you?”

Ruby left the room, and Qrow took the Polaroid out again, stared at the little images of Raven and Tai. New-born Yang in Tai’s arms and an expression of utter adulation on his face. Raven smiling tightly, blank behind the eyes.

“Hey.” Yang’s voice made him look up to where she stood on the threshold, wearing pyjamas and her hair tied back in a messy ponytail. “Ruby got her photo, then?”

“Yeah.” He stood up and held out the picture. “And I wanted to give you this. You might not want it, but I thought I’d ask.”

She stared at it in silence for a moment, her expression unreadable. Finally, she pursed her lips.

“If you don’t want it-”

He was cut off by her stepping forwards and wrapping her arms around his neck. She hugged him tightly for a brief moment, then stepped away, still clutching the Polaroid.

“Thanks.” She said quietly, a strained edge to her voice, then walked back to her and Ruby’s bedroom.

Qrow sighed. Making both his nieces cry in one day was not what he considered an achievement, and he felt more exhausted than ever. But Ruby was going to pass her assignment and hopefully stay friends with Weiss. Yang had something, however small, to know her mother by. To hopefully understand that it wasn’t her fault Raven had left. Qrow might have been slipping under but he was damned if he would let those girls drown too. Even if for now their life jackets were just a piece of paper with a loving face on it. Sometimes that was enough.


	14. Improved Outlook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ozpin returns to the bar, and Ruby and Yang come to visit too.

Qrow’s exhaustion carried through to Friday, the ten hours he’d slept not seeming to affect it. It was something deeper, something cold and familiar that had taken root in him and wouldn’t stop growing. He hadn’t been awake before Ruby and Yang had left for school, and had missed out on wishing Ruby luck on her project and Yang a good kickboxing class. He wished he’d been better, wished he’d gotten up earlier, something.

_Too little, too late_ , he thought. _Like always._

He dragged his feet on his walk up to the bar. The cut on his side was healing well; he’d stopped taking his painkillers and felt fine without them. There was no need to take it slow. But he found that he didn’t want to go in, not with Salem hanging around like she had been, not with the ever-present knowledge that he was likely being watched more closely than usual. Taking a drink knowing it could be the sip that got him fired but not being able to stop, and wanting to drink more because of the stress.

* * *

 

Ozpin came in at four as usual, and Qrow forced himself back to reality from the subconscious mire he’d been wallowing in. He ordered his usual, sat in his usual spot, and tipped as usual. He was wearing a suit again, and the little green scarf with the crucifix brooch, his cane leaning against the bar on his right. Qrow didn’t offer any further conversation at first, just threw a dollar into the cash register and pulled out a can of soda in silence.

“You look tired, Qrow.” Ozpin finally commented with an undertone of sadness.

“Oh, thanks.” Qrow replied sarcastically, and sipped his soda. “Nice to know my aging’s so apparent.” It was annoying how easily Ozpin could pick up on how he was feeling, mostly because it forced him to acknowledge and talk about it.

“That isn’t what I meant. I’m sorry it came across that way.”

“Nah, I know what you mean.” He glanced around furtively and turned away to pour a splash of vodka from his flask into the can.

“Didn’t you sleep well last night?”

“I slept fine.” The words came out low and dark, and he put down his flask with more force than necessary. When he turned around, Ozpin was frowning, mouth a thin line.

“I understand.” He said quietly. “But there’s no need to take it out on me.”

Qrow deflated and moved to lean on the bar opposite Ozpin. “Sorry. I’ve had a rough week.”

“I’ve noticed that you’ve been withdrawn.”

“Salem’s been here three days out of six.” He shot a glance towards the office door, though he couldn’t actually see it from where he stood. “That’s more than she came in over the last six weeks put together. I wanna know what she’s planning. That, and… I think she found my flask.”

Ozpin nodded slowly. “Were you disciplined?”

“Not yet. But she’s keeping an eye on me.”

“I see.” There was a short silence, then he reached across the bar and touched Qrow’s hand again, right fingers over his left.

Qrow resisted the urge to pull his hand away as though he’d been burnt.

“Would you like to meet me again this weekend? It sounds like it would benefit you to talk about her where’s there’s no risk of her hearing.”

He closed his eyes for a moment and nodded. “Yeah.” When he looked up Ozpin was staring levelly at him. “Please. Sunday, if you can make it.”

“I can. Where would you like to meet?”

“Uh…” Qrow considered some options for a moment, but it was like he was looking at his thoughts through water. He couldn’t think straight with Ozpin so close, their hands still together, but he didn’t want to pull away. “I’ll text you later with some ideas, if you like.”

“Alright.” He gave Qrow’s fingers a quick squeeze and withdrew his hand back to his mug.

He couldn’t not smile at him, watching as he took a sip of cocoa and looked down at the formation of bubbles in the mug. Qrow looked at his hands again, long unadorned fingers. He knew he would have to ask if he was single eventually, or at least wait until he volunteered the information himself. But he didn’t want the bad answer; he’d rather let himself believe, be strung along for nothing but these little sparks of joy, than be disappointed yet again.

Ozpin looked up from his drink like he’d suddenly remembered something. “I sat in on Ruby’s social studies class for her presentation today.”

“Oh, yeah. She said you were going to.” Qrow hesitated for a second. “How did she do?”

“I’m not her subject teacher, so I can’t tell you her grade. But she and the rest of her group did admirably. And I was impressed at her confidence in front of the class.”

Pride swelled in his chest. “Ah, I told her she’d do well. Did she get her extra credit?”

“I’m not allowed to tell you that either.” Ozpin chuckled. “But she did hand around a photo, so logically…” He shrugged. “She talked about you, you know.”

“She said she might. What’d she say?”

“She described your living situation, and that you work long hours, but still do your best for her and Yang. She also mentioned that the two of you are not related by blood, but that doesn’t make you any less of a family.”

“Well, isn’t that the sickliest thing you’ve ever heard?” Qrow said, but he was grinning.

“Ruby seemed very proud of her family as a whole.”

“Yeah, I don’t blame her. Her dad, Tai, he loves those kids more than anyone, more than anything. And her mom was…” He shook his head. “She was one of those people. Magnetic, you know? She loved everyone and everyone loved her back. I think Ruby takes after her.”

Ozpin nodded, but didn’t reply, just smiled gently.

Qrow couldn’t stop talking after that, telling Ozpin the story of the photo from last night, followed by a few calmer tales from his late teens and early twenties with his sister and their best friends. Ozpin mostly just listened, chin in his hand and a dreamy expression on his face, occasionally asking a question or agreeing on something. It felt nice to be listened to like that, and Qrow got the feeling that if roles were reversed, he’d be happy to do the same. That was a nice idea: One day finding out more about Oz.

He left late again, at nearly five as he had on Monday, intending to pick up Oscar from whatever extra-curricular he was at today. Qrow waved him off with a smile, feeling that the weight in his chest had lessened slightly. It was the same way he’d felt upon seeing James out of his apartment the other day, and he realised he’d be glad to one day see Ozpin the same way: A close friend, someone he could trust and talk to without pressure. But still, that thought wasn’t quite right; he knew what he really wanted.

He clenched his left hand and felt the burn of phantom fingers in his.

* * *

 

It was barely a quarter past five when the gaggle of kids came in, and he was shocked to see Ruby and Yang leading the pack. There were nine of them altogether, and they clustered around the bar, blocking the gangway. Qrow raised a quizzical eyebrow as Ruby grinned up at him.

“Hi Uncle Qrow.” She said.

“Hey. What’s the occasion?” He glanced around at the group, some of whom were looking around curiously or leaning on the bar.

“We just wanted to come say hi and tell you about our project!”

“Yeah, we thought we could hang out for a while.” Yang shrugged. “That’s okay, right?”

“Sure, I guess so. You wanna introduce me to your friends?”

Yang slapped her friends Blake and Sun on the shoulders as she said their names, then let Ruby talk about her own friends. An’s son Lie Ren and the girl they’d taken in, Nora, had been Ruby’s groupmates, and their other two friends Jaune and Pyrrha were along for the ride. By the time she got to the last kid he was already losing track of the names.

“Oh, and this is Oscar!” Ruby pulled a small, dark haired boy forwards from the back of the group. “He’s Professor Ozpin’s son!”

Qrow couldn’t find anything to say for a moment, as Oscar pointedly looked at the ground, his shoulders rounded and his face red. Finally, he collected himself, remembering what Ozpin had said before he left. “You know your dad was gonna come get you from school, don’t you?”

Oscar’s eyes widened at being spoken to directly, and he finally looked up. “Uh, well, I… I talked to him. He’s coming to get me later.”

“Oh. Okay, good.” Qrow looked up as another customer walked into the bar and couldn’t reach the counter for the number of bodies around it. “Look, there’s not much space in here. Order what you want, Ruby and Yang can bring it through. The rest of you can go sit around the big table in the side room.”

They all ordered and paid separately, and Qrow had to write down all the milkshakes and sodas and coffees they wanted, handing out their pre-packaged dollar cookies from the basket on the bar top before they left. Then he served the waiting customer their beer and shouted the milkshake orders through to the kitchen, before turning back to his nieces, sitting at the bar waiting for their drinks.

Ruby was wearing a suspicious expression. “I thought you didn’t know Professor Ozpin?” She finally asked.

“We’re familiar.” Qrow evaded, but then settled for a half-truth as he started on a coffee. “He’s a regular here.”

“Really?” Yang looked incredulous. “Why?”

“I don’t know. Maybe he likes it here.”

“So, do you know Oscar, too?” Ruby frowned.

“No, I’ve never met him before, but Oz- Ozpin talks about him.” He placed the first drink on a tray and moved on to the next. “Anyway, I thought your buddy Weiss would be here. Where’s she at?”

“She wanted to come, but her dad made her go home.” Her expression grew taut for a moment, but then her eyes lit up. “Oh! I didn’t even tell you what I came here for! We got an A+ on the project!”

“Oh, you did?” Qrow smiled. “Nice work, kid, I knew you’d do well. Did you get the extra credit?”

“Yep! Hundred and ten percent.” She grinned. “Everyone was really great, Weiss talked about growing up with a pretty normal family and all the opportunities it gave her, Ren talked about his dad being away with the army, and Nora talked about… Well, everything that led to her living with Ren.” She leaned back from the bar to see into the side room, where the dull buzz of conversation was audible.

“Sounds like you all worked hard. Good.” He placed the second coffee, a water bottle, and two cans of soda on the first tray and pushed it across to Ruby. “Here, you take that through. Yang can take the rest.”

Ruby nodded and took the tray, leaving Yang sitting at the bar with her chin on her hand.

“So, how’s your day been, Firecracker?” Qrow asked.

She shrugged. “Not bad. Nothing special.”

“What about your kickboxing class? Is that where you met Oscar?”

“No.” She snorted. “Can you imagine him kickboxing with seniors? Someone would break him like a twig. He’s in Ruby’s homework club thing.” She sighed. “Kickboxing was fine, though. I’m doing well.”

“You don’t seem like you’re doing well.” He leaned on the counter across from her. “You seem like you’d rather not be here.”

“No, it’s not…” Yang sighed and half-smiled. “I’m just kinda distracted.”

“Well, talk to me.”

There was a long pause, and she played with a strand of her hair, chewing her lip.

Finally, she looked up at him. “I didn’t really thank you properly for that photo. But I do really appreciate it. Dad doesn’t have many photos of Mom left.”

Qrow was shocked to hear her call Raven ‘Mom’ again, but tried not to show it. “I know. I’ve got a few, but as far as I know, that’s the only one of her with you.”

Yang’s expression grew bitter. “Yeah. I figured.”

“It’s more yours than anyone else’s, though. What’d you do with it?”

Wordlessly, she took out her wallet and opened it for him to see. Tai, Raven, and baby Yang stared back from the clear window inside.

“Oh. Cute.”

“I just want it to always be near me.” She put her wallet away and shook her head with a mirthless laugh. “It’s not even a nice photo, Mom looks like she hates me and Dad already, but I just want… I wanna remember why I’m better off without her.”

Qrow nodded. “Good. Cause you are. We all are.” He patted her arm across the counter. “Just don’t get so wrapped up in one person who doesn’t love you that you forget all the people who do.”

Yang smiled and nodded, but whatever she was about to say was interrupted by a shout from Winter behind him. She passed three obnoxiously large milkshakes through the hatch, and Qrow piled them onto the tray with the last can of soda.

“There. You wanna take that to your friends?”

“Yeah. Thanks, Uncle Qrow.” She picked up the tray, but paused. “Do we get, like… a discount? Money back?”

“Hey, don’t push it. Even _I_ don’t get a discount. Go on.” He waved her off, both of them grinning, and watched as she walked carefully into the side room. Someone whooped as she entered.

They were noisy, their conversation just on the line where he might have gone and told other customers to quiet down. But they were kids, and the bar was pretty empty apart from them. The group started dissipating after almost an hour, Oscar the first to leave, shooting an odd look back at Qrow as he passed. Not long after that, An emerged from the kitchen where she’d been helping out most of the day, and took Ren and Nora home with her. Sun followed about a half-hour later, and Ruby came to the bar with the trays and everyone’s glasses and trash.

“Thanks, kiddo.” He took the trays and started sorting the contents. “You all heading out now?”

“Well, actually, I wanted to ask if we could stay longer. Are we allowed?” She twisted her fingers together.

“I can’t throw you out just for being here, can I? Although, you’ll have to leave once we stop serving food at nine, since you’re technically unaccompanied.”

“Oh. But can we stay until then?”

“If you want, sure.” He turned to put the glasses and mugs into the dish tray. “Is that all of you, or just you and Yang?”

“For now it’s all of us. Jaune and Pyrrha have to go soon, and Blake’s dad’s coming in at seven and then she’ll leave with him when he goes home. So, yeah, after that it’ll just be us.”

“Alright. Yeah, stick around. I’ll pay for you two and Blake to eat if she’s still here when you get hungry. Just keep at least one drink on the table in case my boss comes in. Oh, and move in here where I can see you before it gets busy.”

Ruby nodded, taking in all his instructions. “I’ll go get everyone. Thank you!” She almost ran into the other room, and he was pleased to hear the sounds of laughter and chairs moving.

They settled in a booth not far from the bar, and while Qrow had to go back to drinking as surreptitiously as possible, he was happier being able to see them. It helped that they were quieter now; it seemed that Nora and Sun had been the main source of noise. Once Jaune and Pyrrha left, even Yang’s voice stopped carrying so far, as she and Blake shared another milkshake and chatted to Ruby. Qrow was glad to see them smiling, and especially glad to see both Ruby and Yang looking less stressed than they had all week. A weight had clearly been lifted.

He’d probably never stop worrying about them, but tonight, he was just proud.

Ghira walked in at seven while the girls were eating their meals, and stopped to talk to Blake before approaching the bar. He grinned at Qrow, ordered a large black tea, and sat down as Qrow quickly made it up.

“How are you, Ghira?” He asked easily.

“I’m very well, thank you. And yourself?”

“Never better.” He placed the tea down in front of Ghira. “Noticed your daughter’s getting on pretty well with my nieces over there.”

Ghira chuckled. “It’s the happiest I’ve seen her in months. She met Yang on the first day of the semester, and I’m sure she was introduced to Ruby shortly after.”

“Ah, yeah. They’re pretty inseparable.”

“I’m very glad to see them having fun.” There was a loud laugh from the booth, and he turned to look at them. “It does them good.”

“Agreed.” Qrow watched as Yang whispered something in Blake’s ear, causing her eyes to widen and her face to flush red as she giggled behind her hand.

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about Ruby and Yang.” Ghira said, drawing his attention back to the bar.

“Oh yeah? What about them?”

“Well, to preface, Kali and I have a cabin up in the forest, on the other side of the hills. It’s not far out of town, just a few miles east.”

“Yeah, you’ve told me about that before.” Qrow nodded. “Yang said one of her friends had a cabin up there, I never put two and two together.”

“Now you know.” He was about to continue, but Blake approached the bar holding her empty plate.

Qrow took it from her and deposited it in the dish tray. “Thanks, kid.”

“Oh, no problem.” Blake replied hurriedly. “Um, thank you for paying for me.”

“Don’t mention it. Was it okay?” He felt his face tighten in worry; the fish and chip meal she’d ordered had been cooked from frozen, and he wasn’t sure of its quality.

“Yeah, it was great. Thank you.” She sat down on the bar stool next to her father. “Sorry, I interrupted you.”

“Don’t worry, Blake.” Ghira smiled at her, then turned back to Qrow. “Anyway, I wanted to bring this up to you before we told Ruby and Yang.”

“Is this about the cabin?” Blake asked with a smile.

“Yes. We’re having a small weekend away in the cabin, and Blake wanted to invite some friends. Given that it’s out of town I thought it would be wise to check with their guardians first, so that they aren’t disappointed.”

“Right.” Qrow glanced at his nieces, and spotted Ruby craning to see what was happening around the bar. “When exactly were you thinking? It’s a little late for them to be going anywhere tonight.”

“Not tonight, no. We thought they should have chance to do their homework for Monday first. The idea is to collect them tomorrow afternoon, and they can stay until Monday morning. We’ll drive them to school.”

“And you’ll be there?”

“Kali and I will both be there for most of the weekend, yes.”

“Alright then.” Qrow shrugged and smiled. “I don’t see why they can’t go. Is anyone else going?” He directed the last question at Blake.

“Just Weiss.” She said. “Have you met her?”

“I know of her. Sounds like everyone’s getting on now.”

“We are.”

“Then it sounds like that’s settled.” Ghira grinned. “Can we collect them at, say… two tomorrow?”

“Sure. Can you make it down to Bayside Apartments, or do you wanna pick them up from here?”

“I think we can make it to the apartments.”

“Great. Looks like you’d better go let them know.” Qrow gestured to Blake, who hurried over to the booth with a smile. A moment later he heard Ruby’s excited raised voice, and turned back to Ghira. “Thanks for doing this, Ghira.”

“You don’t need to thank me. It’s enough to see my girl so happy.”

“You won’t be saying that when they’re all still yakking at 3 am.” He joked as the conversation from the booth became louder.

Ghira laughed. “Oh, I don’t know. I think I will.”

* * *

 

Blake left with Ghira when he’d finished his tea, and Ruby and Yang brought their own dirty plates to the bar. Their conversation quietened after that, and Ruby started doing homework at the table while Yang played with her phone. By eight fifteen, they’d gotten bored enough to want to leave, and came back to the bar, waiting quietly in line to speak to Qrow between customers.

“Hey, what’s up?” He asked as he quickly wiped down a spill.

“We’re gonna go home now.” Yang told him. “So we’ll see you… tomorrow morning I guess?”

“Yeah, sure. Just text me when you get home, please.”

“We will!” Ruby replied. “Really, actually this time.”

“Good. And remember what Blake said, do your homework before you go anywhere tomorrow.”

“Oh, god, you sound like Dad.” Yang rolled her eyes, but grinned. “We’ll do it, we’re responsible.”

“Sure you are.” Qrow reached over the counter and mussed her hair. “Go on, get outta here. Have a good night.”

“Thanks Uncle Qrow!” Ruby called back as they turned to leave.

He waved them off and kept serving; Friday night was speeding up. There wasn’t much time to think in between carefully making drinks and communicating with Amber and Winter as they closed up the kitchen, but he was glad to hear of the girls’ weekend plans. Any worries he’d had about the cabin had evaporated when Ghira had confirmed his and Kali’s presence. Getting away from town with their friends would be good for all of them. It also gave Qrow the opportunity to meet Ozpin on Sunday without having to come up with some excuse about where he was going.

Thinking about Ozpin made him sigh with something that fell between worry and frustration. He knew he needed to do something soon, but still there was that strong urge to live in ignorance. But if he wasn’t going to outright act on his feelings, he needed to at least talk about him. Ozpin rarely volunteered information about himself; they usually strayed back to talking about Qrow, Qrow’s life, Qrow’s family. He would have felt selfish if Ozpin wasn’t usually the one to steer the conversation in that direction. The man was a mystery, and more than anything, it made Qrow determined to not allow him to remain so.

In the meantime, Yang texted him as she and Ruby arrived home, and Qrow felt tension he didn’t know he was holding drain out of him. They were learning, and he was right there with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One week until volume 6 premieres! I guess I should explain my plans for that. Chapter 15 will be uploaded as usual on Wednesday, then next Saturday I'm gonna take a break for the premiere. There's a timeskip after chapter 15, so I think it will seem fairly natural to come back with chapter 16 after a week instead of the usual 3 days. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter!


	15. Honey and Sea Salt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow meets Ozpin at the boardwalk, and revelations are had on both sides. Warnings: Nightmares, flashbacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got sick somewhere between the last chapter and this one and it has seriously impacted my productivity on this story. Maybe it's a good thing I'm taking a week out, although I suspect I'm also not going to get much done after Saturday either. I'll be too busy yelling about volume 6 on tumblr. Anyway, this is a big, dialogue-heavy, fun chapter that I hope you all enjoy, because I'm proud of this one!

_He was running. There were brambles sprouting through the cracked surface of the road, smoke pouring out from under the ground. Looking back yielded only glimpses of glowing golden eyes in the darkness. His knee ached, his lungs burning as he panted and gasped. The bar came into view and he ran around to the backlot, desperate for somewhere to hide._

_He was already sitting there, on the ground clutching his side with Tyrian standing over him, grinning wildly. He looked into his own eyes for a second, then spun around to see who was chasing him. And then pain incomparable to anything else he’d ever felt exploded under his ribs, and it was Ozpin standing there with the knife in his hand. He collapsed, a mirror of his other self whom Tyrian was still standing over, frozen, and Ozpin placed a hand on his head in sad resignation._

* * *

 

Qrow woke up to adrenaline rushing through him, and pressed his hands to his face as he got his breath back. It was incredible, he thought, how nightmares he’d assumed had reached their most frightening could still get worse. He couldn’t shake the image of Ozpin’s morose expression, the bloodied knife in his hand. Slowly, his breathing became normal again, his hands stopped trembling, and he got up, trying to erase the memory.

Dreams didn’t mean anything.

The apartment was empty; Ruby and Yang had set off with Blake’s family yesterday afternoon, and the silence was almost disconcerting. They weren’t usually too loud, but Qrow had become used to hearing the quiet buzz of voices and movement through the thin walls. Now that they were gone it was almost like things were back to normal: Him alone with his crappy furniture and his thoughts. At least he was getting out soon.

He had spoken to Ozpin the day before, typed his texts much more carefully and politely than he usually would while they’d debated where to talk. Qrow hadn’t been surprised to learn that Ozpin’s messages were brief and to the point, though not cold, but the little smiling emoticon at the end of the conversation had been a bit of a shock. They’d eventually settled on the Boardwalk Café, a place Qrow didn’t care for but had gone along with for Ozpin’s sake. He was less interested in the quality of the drinks than in the company.

It was raining heavily, sent sideways by a strong wind blowing in from the ocean. By the time he reached the boardwalk, he was drenched and shivering, his thin jacket barely shielding him from the elements. Ozpin was already waiting outside the café, shaded beneath an umbrella but still vaguely damp, his silver hair darkened and dulled.

“Are you insane?” Qrow demanded as he approached. “Why didn’t you wait inside?”

Ozpin laughed and put down the umbrella as they entered the café. “I wanted you to know I was here.”

The café was warm and bright inside, and the scent of burnt coffee and sweet vanilla hung in the air. An unseen speaker played quiet classical music as they ordered their drinks. Qrow was very aware of the fact that his clothes were dripping all over the laminate floor and that there was water in his left sock. He caught a glimpse of himself in the reflective side of the espresso machine and noticed that his hair was completely flat. This was not how he had envisioned talking to Ozpin.

The barista made their drinks, and Qrow carried the tray to a table in front of the window, where Ozpin leant his umbrella against the siding and shed his coat.

“Thank you, Qrow.” He said quietly as Qrow placed his green tea down in front of him.

“No problem.” He muttered back, and set his own black coffee on the table before taking the tray back to the counter. Then he copied Ozpin, and draped his soaked jacket over the back of his chair as he sat down.

“How are you today?” Ozpin asked as he squeezed a tiny sachet of honey into his tea.

Qrow shrugged and plucked his damp t-shirt away from his chest. “Could be better. Could be worse. You?”

“I’m well, thank you.” He looked up from stirring the tea and smiled. “I heard that you met Oscar yesterday.”

“Oh. Yeah, I did. He’s a polite kid.” He remembered their brief interaction and frowned. “Seemed pretty nervous, though.”

“He only recently befriended Ruby and the others, and I’m not sure he was familiar with Yang and her friends at all. It stands to reason he’d be a little apprehensive.”

“Yeah, of course.” Qrow paused, and smiled. “I told you he’d get on with Ruby, didn’t I?”

Oz chuckled. “You did. Apparently your judgement is to be trusted.”

“Damn right it is.”

There was a short silence, broken by a melancholy piano piece in the background. The café was nearly empty, the only other customers seated on the other side of the room. Their conversation was barely a muffled murmur over the music.

Finally, Qrow spoke again. “So, what’s on the agenda for today?”

“Well, if you’d like to talk about Salem, now would be the time.”

He sighed and ran a hand through his wet hair. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m… worried she’s gonna fire me. I can’t afford that right now.”

“How likely do you think it is? Just a possibility? Or a certainty?”

“I’m not sure. She’s too unpredictable for me to say.”

Ozpin nodded and sipped his tea. “I can only agree with you there. Perhaps it would be prudent for you to keep an eye out for another job in the meantime. Just to be safe.”

“Yeah, it would. I just wish I didn’t have to.”

“I understand. It must be very difficult, working with her.”

Qrow leaned back from the table and met Ozpin’s eye. “I get the feeling you know.”

Oz smirked, that smug sort of smile that simultaneously infuriated and intrigued Qrow, but didn’t speak.

“How do you know her? And Cinder, you know her too, don’t you?”

The smirk shrank away, and he put down his cup. “Cinder attended Beacon High School. I’m very familiar with her; she was sent to my office more times than I could count, but her mother was on the administration team. She was never able to be expelled as she deserved. I had the feeling when I met her that she was trouble. When she moved back to Vale last year it was no surprise that she was attracted to Salem and her powerful friends.”

“And Salem herself?”

“Salem’s story is rather more… Complicated.” He placed a hand on his face and sighed deeply, with an agonised expression. “Please do not judge me too harshly for this.” His voice was plaintive.

Qrow leaned forwards again, frowning, and let their hands brush just slightly over the table. “I’m not gonna judge you, Oz. I’m on your side here.”

Ozpin nodded, his lips quirking slightly at the corners. “We used to work together. I… I had an interest in starting a non-profit. I was barely twenty-five at the time, had no experience, and couldn’t find anyone to help me. Salem was… a friend of a friend who heard about my predicament and asked if she could be a part of it.” He shook his head. “Everything was excellent at first. She was organised, unflappable, and she found several other people willing to volunteer their time. And I admired her devotion to our cause.”

“What was your cause?”

“We were providing services to teenagers, those without adequate parental support. A sort of surrogate parent figure, or at least an adult mentor, who could help them find their independence and teach them things their parents never did. We would teach them how to do laundry and cook for themselves, or accompany them to appointments they were frightened to attend alone, or just give advice.”

“Oh.” Qrow had a sudden mental image of himself, aged seventeen, in the throes of mental crisis with nowhere to turn. How grateful he would have been for something like that. “That’s a good idea.”

“It’s a cause that was close to my heart.” Oz sighed again. “Unfortunately, though we operated for over a year, we didn’t manage to help many people. We kept running out of funds, despite advertising and donation campaigns on the streets. One of the jobs Salem had taken over for me was the accounting. She was responsible for all the money that passed through. I became suspicious but she always had an explanation. Eventually, though, I learnt that she had embezzled the non-profit out of sixty thousand dollars, and she left town before I could confront her.”

“Didn’t you call the cops?”

“Of course. But we found that the archives were not thorough enough to warrant prosecution; there was no record that we had ever had the money at all. Of course, she was responsible for that, too. We kept running for a while, but our costs were too high for us to do any good. We shut down after another six months, with a list of over a hundred teenagers waiting for our services.” He shook his head again. “We failed them. Salem failed them. The next time I ran into her, upon her move here to Vale, she treated me to a rant laden with profanity and slurs that told me she never truly cared. In fact, she probably planned what she did from the start.”

Qrow stared across at Ozpin as he looked down, seemingly fascinated with his tea cup. On impulse, he grabbed his hand, squeezing his fingers as Ozpin had his the other day. “It wasn’t your fault.” He said quietly. “She’s the criminal here, she’s the one with no empathy. You were a victim too.”

“I could have done more.”

“You did your best. That’s a lot more than most people would have done.”

Oz pulled his hand away and gripped his cup tightly. He was shaking, Qrow couldn’t help but notice, just a little. “I’m sorry. I got overwrought. But at least now you know.”

“Yeah. I guess.” Qrow took a large gulp of coffee and continued. “But you’re allowed to talk about yourself, you know. You don’t do it often.”

The colour seemed to return to Ozpin’s face again as he half-smiled. “It’s a habit I’ve picked up as a teacher. Some students will find any reason to question your teaching ability, and their parents too; it’s best not to give them any ammunition.” He shrugged. “My life isn’t particularly interesting anyway.”

“Well, I’d still like to know more about it, if you don’t mind.”

“You don’t want to continue talking about Salem? I thought you had grievances.”

“I do, but what else is there to say? She’s scum, and if I wasn’t relying on her for an income I’d tell her as much.” He narrowed his eyes across the table. “You’re evading, Oz.”

“I suppose I am.” Ozpin nodded. “What would you like to know? It’s easier when there’s a jumping-off point, so to speak.”

“Well… How did you come to be principal at Beacon? That must be an interesting story.”

“It depends on your idea of interesting.” He smiled. “Well, not long after the non-profit fell apart, I was offered a job as a counsellor at Signal Middle School, a position I was very lucky to get.”

“Signal? That’s where Tai teaches. Or, used to, I guess.”

“Yes, he was an ESL teacher, is that right?”

Qrow nodded.

“I suspect we never crossed paths; I didn’t stay for long. I only worked part-time anyway, picking up the slack for the other counsellors when the school expanded. With the experience of the non-profit under my belt, I was looking to help the children around me as much as possible. But I learnt that I didn’t have much authority to do what was best for them. I could suggest all I liked, but it was up to the teachers and, more frequently, the head of the school to make the final decision. So I decided to train as a teacher.”

“You went back to school?”

“Yes. I worked part-time and learned part-time to earn a teaching license, then was assigned a mentor by the school district, which happened to place me at Beacon High School. So I left the counselling position, and moved to train under the biology and psychology teacher at Beacon. Whilst doing that, I completed a post-graduate certificate in education, and once I had taken the exams to become a fully qualified teacher, I committed to further schooling to earn a doctorate. I was promoted to Vice Principal of the school after eight years there, and inherited the role of Principal when my predecessor retired the next year.”

“Sounds like a long road filled with learning.” Qrow chuckled. “You really are insane.”

“I’ve often thought so.” Ozpin drained the last of his tea and set the cup upside-down on the saucer. “But I’m very happy with where I am now. It’s been a stressful journey, but worth the effort.”

“It sounds like… Sorry if this is rude, but it sounds like you haven’t had much time outside of work and school. How does Oscar feel about all that?”

Ozpin smiled sadly. “I think he's felt the absence sometimes, in the past. But Oscar was adopted as an older child. At his current age, he’s spent less time with me than without me. I was already Vice Principal by the time he came into my life, and I was sure to make time for him even when it felt like there was none.” He paused. “I understand your concern, though. I worry about it myself.”

Qrow took a moment to take in his words. The answer had only brought up more questions, but they were all prying, and he felt he’d been rude enough. There was no rush to know; he had to remember that. He settled for something less obtrusive.

“So, how old was Oscar when you adopted him?”

“Eight. He had had a difficult life up to then. I don’t know for sure what happened to his parents, but they were declared unfit to raise him. He lived with an aunt until she suddenly passed away, after which he was bounced around the foster care system for a while before he came to me.” Ozpin shook his head. “I was an acquaintance of his aunt, the closest thing to a relative nearby. The administrative issues around adopting him were hell, and the fees seemed to be endless. His future hung in the balance for a long time as the courts decided if a single person could effectively care for him. But I’ve never been as grateful as the day I signed the adoption papers.”

Qrow smiled. “Yeah. I think I know that feeling, in a way.”

“I think you do, too.”

He finished his coffee, and rested his chin in his hand. “So Oscar knows he’s adopted?”

“It would be a little difficult for him to magically forget everything that happened before the age of eight.” Ozpin teased.

“Yeah, alright, stupid question.”

“He’s very aware of his past, if that’s what you mean. It’s as much a part of him as anything he’s experienced since he was adopted. But it didn’t take him long to start calling me ‘Dad’.” He smiled.

Qrow didn’t reply, had nothing appropriate to say. Instead he smiled back, something knowing, because while their circumstances were different, he knew the joy that kids could bring. He couldn’t fathom how difficult both Ozpin and Oscar’s lives must have been for that adoption, the turmoil that must have been present in the beginning. And that Ozpin didn’t mention that Oscar was adopted unless pressed, never referred to him as anything other than his son… That was more than Qrow’s biological parents had done.

He was grateful that Oz had trusted him enough to tell him.

* * *

 

The weather cleared up quickly, and with hair and clothes dried by the warm café interior, they headed down off the boardwalk to stroll along the beach. It was still windy and chilly, the sky and waves an almost uniform pale grey. Qrow had started to shiver again almost instantly and pulled his jacket closer around himself. Without speaking, Ozpin had removed the long black scarf from around his neck and handed it over. Now, Qrow was wearing it as they walked, feeling the residual body heat, absorbing the faint scent of cinnamon and old books.

“We haven’t talked much about you today.” Ozpin said. “Is there anything you’d like to tell me? Anything that happened?”

Qrow shrugged, dragging his mind out of the warm, happy puddle it was sitting in. “I already told you most of it. The photos. That was the worst thing, I think.”

Ozpin tilted his head. “You said you were glad Ruby could see her family photos.”

“Yeah, it’s not the ones I showed Ruby that’re on my mind. It’s the one I gave Yang.” He paused, tiny staring images of Raven and Tai and Yang in his mind’s eye behind clear plastic. “She keeps it with her now. Not because she likes it, because she wants to remember how shitty her mother was.”

“Her mother?”

“My sister. Raven.” Bitterness entered his voice. “She abandoned Yang when she was less than a month old. Came back to see what was going on a couple years ago and hasn’t been heard from since. She…” He sighed. “She did too much wrong to describe.”

“Try.” Ozpin insisted.

Qrow eyed him impatiently, but continued. “We didn’t grow up in a good environment. And that’s all I’m gonna say on that for now.” He pointed at Oz, sensing his intentions. “She had a part in the shit I went through as a kid. I forgave her, at first, but she was never quite right. Obsessed with strength as a means of survival, no interest in anything else. When she started seeing Tai she insisted she saw it in him, but she got more and more withdrawn over time. They bought a house, apparently together, but her name wasn’t on the mortgage anywhere. I tried to warn him, but he was blinded. He loved her.”

“Was this a product of her upbringing?”

“Maybe, but you don’t see me doing that shit.” He shook his head. “Yeah, I was like her once, but I grew. I let people change me. And yeah, it was tough, I felt every single step of it. She never once let anyone in but me. Not even Tai. She just fabricated enough emotions to let everyone think she'd recovered. But she never even wanted to improve.”

“Forgive me, but… you aren’t unbiased in your opinions.”

“No, I’m not. But I’m also not wrong.” He screwed up his face in frustration, trying to find the right words. “You didn’t know her. She knew how goddamn fragile Tai was, she _knew_ he couldn’t pay for that house alone and raise a child alone, and she fucking left him anyway, without so much as a note. He broke down. Summer and I had to step in to help him out; Summer was more of a mother to Yang than Raven ever was.” He let out another sigh that deepened to a growl. “She’s no family of mine anymore.”

They were silent for a moment, footsteps lightly swishing through the sand as gulls called obnoxiously overhead. Qrow watched Ozpin’s expression change through frustration into resignation. He had a sudden flash of his recent nightmare and had to blink it away.

“Sometimes,” Ozpin finally began. “Blood relatives lose the right to be called family. I don’t know the whole story, but… you have more deserving people to call family now.”

Qrow nodded. “I do. Plenty of them. I just worry about Yang. Both people she ever called mother taken from her… Don’t imagine that’s good for the psyche.”

“Perhaps not. But your job as a guardian, and Taiyang’s as a father, is to fill that role without the word. Yang may never have anyone to give a mother’s day gift, but she should have a sensitive, nurturing parental figure to turn to when she needs them. Ruby too.”

“Yeah. We’re both doing our best.”

“I trust that you are. But it’s something to keep in mind.” Ozpin slowed, looking up at the sky for a moment. “My own mother was not an ideal parent. For a while, though we lived in the same house, she refused to acknowledge my existence. But I never felt that I was missing a mother, because I had a family friend who treated me like her own son. She was the inspiration for the mentor program I tried to set up.”

“I’m… sorry to hear that about your mother.”

“Not everyone is cut out to be a parent.” He shrugged. “Some of them know and become one anyway. My mother was one of them. She blamed me for a long time, but I grew enough to know I wasn’t to blame.” He shook his head. “I apologise, we shouldn’t be talking about me. Would you tell me more about Summer and Taiyang?”

Qrow felt a little disoriented by the sudden change of subject, but collected his thoughts, let his memories of Summer back in for a short while. He smiled almost involuntarily. “Summer’s Ruby’s mom. I told you that before, didn’t I? Anyway, we were all friends in high school. Raven and I were loners, but we stuck together; Tai got involved with our troublemaking because he was from a strict family who didn’t give him much freedom. I think he liked the thrill of almost getting caught. Summer was pretty ordinary compared to the rest of us, but… she wasn’t, really. She was special.”

“In what ways?”

“More ways than I can count. She was funny and thoughtful, and she learned _fast_. She was caring, she had a kind word for just about everyone, but if anyone threatened her or us, she’d be the one to step out in front and do something about it. And she was only Ruby’s height at her tallest.” He held out a hand just below his own shoulder height to demonstrate. “She used to stand up to the kids who picked on me and Raven for being dirty and weird. Once, when we were a little older, we were walking home from a bar being followed by three big guys. We were trying to ignore them but Summer wasn’t having it. Just the look she gave them could have killed. She called them a few choice names and they turned around and walked away.”

“It sounds like she was very protective of you all.”

“Yeah. I don’t know how I would have gotten through high school without her and Tai.”

Ozpin nodded. “You must have been very close.”

“We were. Even Raven liked Summer, as much as she ever liked anyone. And…” Qrow paused and pitted his mind against his tongue for a moment, silently fighting himself. To continue was risky; not to continue was dishonest. He sighed. “I was attracted to her. But I was confused, so I never told her, it never seemed worth it. I mean, she and Tai were the best friends I’d ever had.” He forced himself to keep going. “I was attracted to both of them.”

“I see.” Ozpin’s voice was light. “But you never acted on that?”

“Not then. Not until after Raven left. Summer and I moved into the house and paid Tai rent to help him keep up with the mortgage, and look after Yang. We never talked about it, really, but he was finding comfort in us, searching for affection. I think at first he just wanted reassurance that _someone_ loved him, since Raven had decided she didn’t. Summer and I talked about it together a lot and… things just started changing. It became a sort of unofficial relationship, all three of us.” He paused. “I know this all probably sounds weird.”

“Love doesn’t have to be conventional or normal.”

Qrow looked at him, to see him smiling reassuringly, and nodded. “I guess. The problem was, we never really communicated about it. It wasn’t something we felt we could talk about openly. Tai and Summer started getting closer, and after a few months they started talking about another kid. At that point it was time for me to go, ‘cause I knew I didn’t want a kid of my own. There were no hard feelings, but I moved out and left them to it.”

“Just like that?”

“Well, obviously it wasn’t easy. But like I say, no one was mad. I was kinda disappointed, I guess, but we were already limited for time with taking care of Yang. It would have fallen apart anyway, and I knew Summer and Tai would keep their relationship going just fine without me. I got out from under their feet and just visited every week or so, and took the kids every now and then so they could get some alone time.” He shrugged. “They were a lot happier without me. That made it easier to accept.”

Ozpin nodded. “I see. Sorry if that sounded rude. It’s not a situation I’ve ever encountered before.”

“Most people haven’t. I’m not offended.” Qrow looked down and kicked a pebble along the sand. “It was after I moved out that I started drinking, though.”

Oz looked shocked at having been offered this information, and he slowed his pace again. “Was there any specific reason? Or just the circumstances? If that’s not too prying, of course.”

“It’s fine. I was working at a shitty Irish pub, I’d just started there when I moved out. Every single one of my co-workers was intoxicated on the job, and I’m not exaggerating, even my boss got drunk most nights. They invited me to join, so I did. You know, I drank before, casually, but this was the first time I ever had a habit. I enjoyed it, so I stuck with it. Moved through a couple more jobs but kept up the habit, although it was relatively light at the time. It didn’t get worse until…” He trailed off, looking down at the sand again, unable to bear saying the words.

There was another long silence. The wind seemed to roar as it blew past Qrow’s ears, and he buried his face in Ozpin’s scarf, trying to disappear. He was thinking about her again, his last memory of the night before he’d blacked out.

_The bar had been packed, a busy Saturday night turning the place into a sauna. Qrow and Summer had been too drunk to care, Tai the designated driver, stuck with water and soda. He had danced with her for a while as Qrow had wandered around the dancefloor flirting with anyone who would look at him twice. Eventually, Tai had gotten bored and gone to sit outside in the cool breeze, and Summer had grabbed Qrow’s hand and dragged him away from whoever he’d been talking to. They’d danced together, laughing all the while, and he’d fallen over his own feet and been asked to leave._

_After that was a blur. They’d put him in the backseat. A big splash of empty darkness. Screaming that had been Tai but hadn’t sounded like him. His knee sending pain through his left leg. Someone dragging him out. A blanket on the road covering a vaguely humanoid shape. The corner of a red and white dress visible beneath, but hadn’t it just been white earlier? Then more darkness, more darkness, more darkness…_

He came back to the present, and found Ozpin staring at him as they walked. There was that irritating concerned expression again, except he found that it didn’t irritate him anymore. It made him feel soft and malleable, like he was made of rubber and there was heat in the gaze. He thought he could almost feel it under his skin.

“Sorry.” He muttered. “Zoned out.”

“Don’t worry.” Ozpin replied. “Shall we walk back up to the parking lot?” He pointed to the trail off the beach not far ahead.

Qrow nodded, and followed him without speaking.

He shook the memories off as they climbed the shallow incline to the parking lot, and Ozpin led him to his car.

“It’s been good to talk to you again.” Oz said. “I think we both got a lot off our chests.”

“Yeah. It’s been nice.” Qrow hesitated. “And I appreciate knowing you better.”

“And the same to you.” He unlocked the car.

Qrow started to remove Ozpin’s scarf, intending to give it back, but before he could unwind it, he was stopped. Ozpin placed both of his cold hands over Qrow’s, pressing the scarf back into place.

“Keep that.” He said quietly. Their faces were very close together. “You’ll need it for your walk home. I won’t miss it.” He let go of him.

With nothing to say, Qrow floundered for a minute, then acted without thinking. He pulled Ozpin into a hug, resting his head on his shoulder and hoping that this expressed some of the gratitude he was struggling to put into words. He felt Oz’s stiff shoulders relax, his own head bowing into the embrace as he held Qrow tightly. For a while it seemed that neither of them wanted to pull away; they stayed, silent, for what felt like forever.

Finally, Qrow withdrew, still speechless. He looked up at Ozpin and saw that his cheeks were pink under the frames of his glasses.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Qrow.” He finally said.

“Yeah. See you, Oz. Take care.”

“And you.” Ozpin got into the car and started the engine.

Qrow stayed to wave him off, then turned back the way he had come. His mind was busy; he felt like the teenager he’d described to Ozpin earlier, confused and hopeful and constantly overwhelmed. He needed time to think before he went home, even though he was desperate for a drink. The walk back along the beach would be long enough for him to calm down.

His hands shook as he tucked the long scarf back into his jacket. He was thankful for it, worried about it, delighted by it, all at once. Knowing that Ozpin cared about him was one thing; the uncertainty about which way their relationship was going and how fast: that was terrifying. But Qrow found he didn’t care. He wanted to lean into it, to feel the fear. To take the chance. There was still so much he didn’t know, but the way Ozpin had talked about adopting Oscar, it seemed he was unattached. The way he’d grabbed his hands… it all felt hopeful.

And Qrow did feel optimistic, overall. His situation was still the same, but that didn’t mean he had to allow it to stay that way. He could start looking around for another job. He had knowledge against Salem. There were options. He wasn’t helpless; he never had been, but he had been blind. Given time, he knew he’d be blind again, when the cloud settled. This wouldn’t last. But today, and tomorrow be damned, today he could pretend it would. Like he could ride the wave forever.

He walked home wondering about a future he couldn’t yet see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, I take my leave for a week. Chapter 16 will be up on Halloween night, and hopefully by then I'll have caught back up with myself and won't be full of flu. As always, if you have any questions, please ask, and I'll answer as long as it won't spoil anything! I always love hearing what you guys think <3


	16. Solstice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Winter arrives. Qrow reflects on the time that has passed and gives James a helping hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's back! I've done a lot of editing and planning in the last week so even though I've made no actual writing progress, I know where I'm going now. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

The first day of winter dawned with mist in the air, creeping down across Vale from the hills. Qrow’s truck rattled unhappily as he sat in it blasting the air and waiting for the condensation to evaporate from the windshield. It was barely 7 am; the sun was not yet up, but he had something to do before work. Today was the last day of the bar’s operation before New Year’s Eve, and Ruby and Yang’s last day of school before the holidays. It would be busy, but there would soon be time to relax.

Qrow silently marvelled to himself as he drove carefully north out of the town proper, thinking about time. It had been four months since his nieces had moved in with him, four months since he’d last seen Tai. Almost four months since a silver-haired stranger had sat down at his bar for the first time. Three months since he’d chosen to strive for more.

Fall had been long, though, and the air had been smoky, blown down from unseasonal forest fires in Canada one week and up from California brush fires the next. Now with winter’s chill, the air was clear, but Qrow felt he had taken on some of that smoke. The cycles he lived his life by had continued to turn in the same predictable way they always did. A bad day, a day of redemption, a week-long downfall back to another bad day. He had, at least, found that he now had it in him to try to be better.

But yes, the hope had died a little; his moment of buoyant dreaminess back on the beach hadn’t changed much, and while his relationship with Ozpin was still good, it hadn’t exactly progressed. They were stuck in that awkward stage, touching each other’s hands and giving meaningful looks and embracing like old friends and never really _saying_ anything. A few truths here and there, but as time had gone on Qrow found the barrier to the trauma Ozpin wanted him to talk through was thick enough he struggled to break it down. Things were as they always had been, as everything Qrow touched eventually became grey and dull.

When it came down to it, there was still fear, and he was now getting the feeling it came from both sides. Ozpin continued to evade questions about himself, to talk about anything but his own life. Qrow did the same when it came down to the wire, and too many conversations had ended with awkward silence as they’d run out of conversation topics. He couldn’t help feeling that he’d gotten his hopes too high, dreamed too big, imagined he’d get lucky where he never had before. Delusions of grandeur, that’s what he’d call it. The idea that they would succeed. He still wasn’t sure if his idea of success was the same as Ozpin’s; he’d never had the courage to ask. Maybe that cowardice was the root of the problem.

He shook off his concerns as he finally reached the address he’d been given, and pulled off the isolated suburban road onto a long, neatly paved driveway. He parked his truck in front of the house and ducked to see the whole thing through the windshield. It was enormous, all steel and white facing surrounding the centrepiece of a glass-walled stairwell. A few lights were on, staining the driveway blue through thin curtains.

“Fucking hell, Ironwood.” Qrow muttered to himself, and shook his head. He’d been expecting something expensive, but this place was huge. Still, James had always had a penchant for excessive displays of wealth; it wasn’t that he was materialistic so much as that he wanted people to think he was. There was some political reason for it, Qrow was sure, but to him it just seemed like James had carried on the habits of his avaricious parents.

He shivered as he knocked on the front door, hugging himself and waiting for someone to answer. When no one did, he located the doorbell in the semi-darkness and leaned on it until he heard footsteps from inside.

Penny answered the door, wearing a pair of short overalls over a Christmas sweater and leggings. “Oh! Good morning!” She greeted him cheerfully. “Please come in.”

Qrow followed her into the hallway, directly to the right of the stairwell. The heating was on, and the warm air in combination with the friendly amber lighting made him feel better immediately. He stepped a little further in and saw a tall fir tree sitting in a pot beside the stairs. There was a stepladder and a large box of decorations nearby, and a length of tinsel was half-wrapped around the top part.

“Already decorating, huh?” He asked.

“I think it’s very important that the house looks welcoming.” She replied assuredly. “Anyway, this way I’m not in Father’s way.”

At that moment, the door closest to them opened, and James stepped out, holding a paper file in his right hand. He tutted. “I knew that had to be you. Who else would make so much noise at 7 am?”

“Who else would get up at 6 am to help you unpack?” Qrow retorted.

James smiled. “You make a good point.”

Qrow stepped forwards to hug him. “Good to see you again, Jimmy. Want a hand in here?”

“If you like.” They let go of each other and he led Qrow into what was clearly his home office.

The room was sparse and far larger than the furniture demanded. A large white desk and leather chair sat dead centre of the floor, with a sideboard under the window, a bookshelf against the left wall, and a drinks cabinet against the right. The carpet was greyish blue, the walls as stark white as the outside of the house.

“Pretty empty, isn’t it?” Qrow remarked.

“I’m not finished yet.” James replied, depositing the file on the desk. “There’s going to be more furniture in here, but I have to go out and buy it. I’m waiting until after the holidays.”

“Yeah, now’s not the best time.”

“Now is not really the best time for anything.” He sighed. “I’m very grateful for you even coming out here. I know it must be inconvenient for you.”

Qrow shrugged. “Sure, but it’s pretty inconvenient for you too. So it took you a couple extra weeks to get everything ready; buying a house is complicated.”

“How would you know?” James teased.

“Eh, I watched Tai do it. Looked like hell to me; that’s why I never bothered.”

“Well, still, I’m glad you’re here.” He paused. “I’ve actually only got a few more things to do in here. Would you do me a favour and go and make us coffee? I know you must be tired, and I certainly am.”

“Sure.”

Qrow made his way to the kitchen, finding the living and dining room first when he went too far down the hall. The coffee machine was fancy and complicated, but he figured out how it worked pretty quickly and set it to brew. The cabinets were empty, and he quietly cursed James’ name as he looked at all of the boxes that were stacked to the height of the counter until he found the one with the mugs in it. Then he took his flask out from inside his jacket and poured a generous amount of whiskey into one of the two he’d chosen. He knew he shouldn’t when he had to drive home, but that was six hours and plenty of manual labour from now; he’d work off one drink.

Besides, James was right: He was tired, his eyes stung from it. He’d gotten in from work at two thirty this morning, gotten to bed at three, and woken up at six. There was a long day ahead of him and frankly, he thought he deserved a drink before he went to work. At least he could drink something other than vodka behind the bar today, since Salem had already gone on vacation and left him with the responsibility of the year’s final close.

He was vigorously stirring his coffee when James walked in, a pile of flattened cardboard boxes in his arms.

“I never knew I owned so many books until we moved.” He grumbled over the stack, then dumped it into a recycling bag in the corner. “You found the mugs, then?”

“Yeah, asshole, I found them.” Qrow held up the untampered mug. “Here, you still take it black, don’t you?”

“I do. Thank you.” James took the mug and leaned on the counter beside him. “We’ve been doing this since 5 am. You know Penny finished her bedroom and bathroom in less than an hour?”

“Jesus. Why’d you need to start so early?”

“I just want to get everything done before Christmas Eve.”

“Well, fair enough, I guess.” Qrow sipped his coffee, simultaneously burning his tongue and finding that he’d made it rather too strong. He grimaced, but James didn’t seem to notice.

“We’d better carry on. Start with the tableware, since you’ve already opened it.”

“Yes, sir.” He grumbled sarcastically, but did as he was asked.

Their conversation was merely practical for a while, as Qrow emptied a couple of boxes into the cabinets that James directed him to while carefully unpacking bubble-wrapped wine glasses. He noticed that the wine rack under the counter already had a few bottles in it, and that the food cupboards were full. When they’d had time to go grocery shopping, he had no idea; they’d only arrived in Vale yesterday. He didn’t ask, content to stack pristine plate after plate into their appropriate places.

* * *

 

The sun rose, and Penny wandered in and out of the kitchen for a drink, then a snack, then the scissors to unwrap some new ornaments. Finally, they took a break, Qrow perching on the marble countertop just to see if James would say anything. He shook his head, but didn’t admonish him.

“So, how have you been since I’ve been away?” He asked instead. “Anything new in your life?”

Qrow finished the last swig of his now-cold coffee and winced again. “Not much. Pretty sure I almost got fired once.”

“What?” James demanded. “Why?”

He relayed the tale of Salem finding his flask under the bar, and god, that was so long ago now; she almost seemed to have forgotten about it, though she was still around the bar frequently. He got distracted talking about Tyrian and Salem refusing to ban him from the bar and showed James the shiny pink scar on the right of his abdomen where the wound had healed.

“And I always thought _my_ life was a little too exciting.” James intoned. “Aren’t you worried that he was never caught, though?”

“Yeah, sometimes.” Qrow shrugged. “But life’s not like a movie, not everything gets neatly tied off. He’ll probably disappear and nothing’ll ever come of it. I’m just glad things have calmed down.” He paused, thinking about his long days at work, habitual drunkenness, and regular customers. And the one in particular who drank only hot cocoa, and tipped two dollars every single day, and looked at him like he was worth the world. “Although, uh…” He trailed off, feeling young and dumb, the way he had when he’d first told James about his relationship with Tai and Summer back in the day.

“Although what?” James prompted.

Qrow hesitated and looked at the floor, counting the patterns of the dark tiles on the floor. “Well, I met someone at work. His name’s Ozpin. To be honest, he’s fucking weird, but he started turning up at the bar every day and… Yeah. I don’t know.” He shrugged again, awkwardly. “We’re friends, I guess.”

James read his tone, and gave him a withering look. “Qrow.”

“Yeah, alright, yeah, I know.” He ran a hand through his hair and searched for a way to express what he felt that didn’t sound dumb. He couldn’t find one. “I’ve got feelings for him, okay? You’ve heard this all before.”

“A hundred times, yes. Are you actually going to do something about it?”

“Probably not. What good is it gonna do me? You know what I’m like.”

“I do.” James paused. “What’s _he_ like?”

“Can’t even describe him. Different. You’d know if you saw him on the street. He’s the principal of Beacon High School.”

James’ eyebrows shot up. “What?”

“Yeah, I know. Weird.” Qrow repeated.

The subject ended there, and they were soon back to emptying boxes, the last one of which was filled with utensils and pans, and which Qrow managed to drop on the tile with such a deafening crash that Penny came rushing in to see what had happened. She helped them clear up, then went back to the Christmas tree while Qrow and James relocated to the living and dining room.

Qrow took charge of loading the fine china into the hutch near the dining table while James unpacked decorative items onto the living area shelves and extra cushions onto the couch. The thin morning sun was bright through the large folding patio door, reflecting off James’ right arm as he moved.

After a while of working in silence, he sighed.

“God damn it.” He was trying to open the door to the closet behind the couch, only getting it halfway before it hit the back. “Could you come and give me a hand, Qrow?”

Qrow nodded and carefully put down the delicate tea cup he was unwrapping from reams of paper to help. They each grabbed one end of the massive couch and lifted it just slightly off the floor, edging it forwards until the door could be fully opened.

“Thank you.” James said, rubbing his left arm. “In hindsight, maybe the couch should have gone somewhere else.”

“I can help you shift it, if you want?”

“No, it’s fine. It doesn’t really bother me.”

Qrow could tell that it _did_ bother him, but didn’t say so, just went back to the china hutch. James obsessed over his space, about using it to its best potential, something Qrow didn’t give the slightest shit about. He couldn’t help him put things right if he wouldn’t tell him how, so he just finished unravelling the paper from the teacup and put it up on the appropriate shelf.

“You ever use these, Jimmy?” He asked.

James turned from staring quizzically at the couch. “Now and then, usually when we have guests.”

“What about at Christmas?”

“Yes, we usually use them on Christmas day. Why?”

Qrow shrugged. “Just wondered. Never saw the point of having plates you never use.”

“It’s just tradition.”

“What are you doing for Christmas this year? Guessing you’re sticking around here.”

“Well, there’s not anywhere else to go, not now my father’s gone. But yes, Penny wants to stay at home since it’s our first Christmas here, and I have to agree with her.”

“Right, of course. But you know, you two could come visit over the holidays sometime if you want.”

James chuckled. “We could. But I’m not sure I wouldn’t prefer to host you here.”

“Oh, I see how it is, too rich to be seen at my place.” Qrow teased.

“Shut up.” He rolled his eyes. “Really, though. I know Penny wants to see Ruby and Yang again, they’re all she can talk about. But you’ve talked about how small your apartment is yourself.”

Qrow sighed and set a stack of dessert plates in the hutch. “Yeah, you’re right. But don’t forget Tai’s coming back, as well.”

“Oh. Yes, of course he is. Well, it’d be nice to see him too. We have plenty of space.”

“Right.” Qrow got that annoying sense of materialism from him again, but didn’t mention it. “Sure, maybe we’ll make it up sometime. I’ll ask what Tai and the kids think.”

“Alright. When will he be back?”

“Tomorrow. I’m making the drive up to Portland to get him from the airport.”

“That’s generous of you.”

“He’ll have just gotten off a sixteen hour flight, I’m not gonna make him find his own way back.” He shrugged and took the last plate out of the china box. “I know he’d do the same for me.”

“I’m sure he would.”

* * *

 

They unloaded a few more boxes, Qrow alphabetising DVDs at James’ insistence and carefully lining them up on the media unit while James unpacked miscellaneous objects into the closet behind the couch. Eventually, Penny came in, almost dancing around with excitement, declaring that the Christmas tree was done and they should go and look _right now_. They obediently followed her back to the hallway, where the tree was now decorated in an attractive gradient of colour, from silver at the top through blue and into mint green at the bottom. The star at the top was so big it made the branch droop, and the whole thing reached so high Penny could touch it from the top of the stairs.

After they’d heaped praise on her, she disappeared up to her bedroom to continue organising up there, and James and Qrow headed back to the living room.

“She’s really got an eye for that kind of thing, hasn’t she?” Qrow said.

“She does. She’s got a mineral collection she sorts in the same way, in a rainbow.” James smiled, and there was pride in his voice.

“How’s she doing with the online classes, by the way?”

“Very well. Her GPA was 3.8 for the fall semester.” He opened a box full of books and placed a few larger volumes on the coffee table, then paused. “Did I tell you what she told me the other day?”

Qrow raised an eyebrow. “No, what?”

James shook his head and smiled again. “She wants to go back to public high school. Well, actually, she’s not sure yet, but she’s been talking to Ruby a lot, and _apparently_ Ruby says that Beacon High School is a great place to learn.” He fixed Qrow with a humoured stare. “And that the teachers and principal are very kind.”

“Yeah, Ruby’s been texting her non-stop.” He smirked. “Never known a kid to like school so much, even if she does complain about homework.”

“She’s certainly persuaded Penny to some degree, though I wonder if it isn’t mostly just the idea of having friends already waiting when she gets there. You know I keep catching her on the phone with Ruby at midnight?”

“Really?” Qrow chuckled. “Well, I’d apologise, but midnight is kinda out of my jurisdiction when I’m at work.”

“There’s nothing to apologise for. I have to enforce the rules so I can actually sleep, but I’m glad that she and Ruby are friends. And if she does want to go back to high school, I’ll feel better knowing Ruby and Yang will support her.”

“Yeah, me too. They wouldn’t hesitate.”

“I know.”

* * *

 

The house was far from finished by the time Qrow had to leave at 1 pm, but it did look much more lived in now. The hallway was still rather bare, but when Qrow mentioned it James just poked a large box with his foot to hear the picture frames rattle inside. They stood in front of the door for a moment, Qrow hesitant to go back out into the cold.

“It’s looking pretty nice, overall.” He commented. “Not the most colourful place, though, is it?”

“Have you ever heard of minimalism?” James asked.

“Yeah, I’ve heard of it. I’ve got too much _stuff_ in my life to be well-acquainted, though. Anyway, I’ve gotta go dump the truck and walk to work.”

“And you’re sure you don’t want anything to eat before you leave?”

Qrow had turned him down three times already, and shook his head again. “Definitely not. I’ll steal something out of the kitchen, don’t worry about it.”

“As long as you’re sure.” James reached out to embrace him again. “I don’t suppose we’ll see each other again before Christmas day, so… I hope it’s a happy one.”

“Yeah, you too. Good tidings and all that.” He let go and smiled. “I’ll get back to you on that invite.”

“Thanks. Oh, and tell Taiyang I said hello when you see him.”

“Will do. See you, James.” He left the house with a final wave, got into his truck, and sat there for a while as the condensation cleared from the windshield again. As taxing as his morning had been, and as tired as he felt, he was looking forward to his final shift. Sure, twelve hours of Christmas music made him want to cut his own head off and he was sure Cinder would show up tonight, but it was the holidays. Everyone would be in a good mood, he could get happily drunk, Salem was gone. If he couldn’t enjoy work now, he never would.


	17. Reciprocation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow prepares for the holidays, and meets Ozpin one last time before the break.

The crowd in the bar was thinning out when Qrow arrived, swinging a large gift bag in his hands as he walked. It was often a little busier at this time of year, as cold locals dropped in hoping for a warm drink and the relief of heating. But it was still a weekday, and the dead hours of the early afternoon were as normal, even with the fairy lights blinking in the windows and the mistletoe hanging above the tables for two.

Someone had stuck some above the bar since last night, hung awkwardly with tape between the menu boards. The first thing Qrow did was find the table it belonged to and relocate it, mildly irritated. It had probably been Amber’s doing; he’d let slip to her the odd status of his relationship with Ozpin, and the mistletoe had been directly above his usual seat. Well, it looked stupid up there anyway, it interrupted the line of the tinsel stapled to the boards. That’s what he told himself, at least.

He took over from An behind the bar, and handed her a sheaf of Christmas cards before she headed for the kitchen. There was one from him, and two each from Ruby and Yang, for Ren and Nora. An thanked him with a smile, and wished him a happy holidays himself. She had looked much more relaxed lately, ever since her husband Li had finally come home from his station with the military. In fact, she’d been downright cheerful most days, much less bothered by loud customers and Salem’s demands.

Qrow served coffees to a group of customers who entered, then followed An into the kitchen with another, smaller gift bag and two more envelopes in hand. Amber was rinsing dishes and loading the washer while Winter arranged frozen pastries on a tray for the oven. He placed the bag, heavy with the expensive chocolates both women liked, onto the high shelf beside the door to the cooler. An looked up from washing her hands as he leant the cards against it.

“You’re certainly feeling generous today.” She commented.

Qrow shrugged. “It’s the holidays.”

“I thought you didn’t ‘ _do_ ’ holidays?” Winter asked. “That’s what you said last year.”

“Yeah, I didn’t then. Anyway, that’s for you two.” He inclined his head at the shelf.

“But we didn’t get you anything!” Amber exclaimed, her eyes wide as she clutched a wet plate.

“Doesn’t matter. Happy holidays.” He went to walk back out to the bar, but Winter spoke again:

“You’re a damn strange person, Qrow.”

He couldn’t stop the smirk creeping onto his face. “You know it, Ice Queen.”

He busied himself behind the bar for a while, mostly cleaning anything that he wouldn’t touch for the rest of the night so that he could get drunk without worrying. Salem wasn’t here, but she would be back before New Year’s Eve, and Qrow didn’t doubt she would check in on the bar. She had gone back to mostly leaving him alone, despite being around more often, preferring to sit in her office all day. In any case, he couldn’t leave a mess behind; it wasn’t worth the risk.

Over the next couple of hours, he barely drank, keeping himself busy between customers by cleaning the shelves under the bar. His eye kept being drawn back to the gift bag tucked away in the corner, the three cards and the oddly-shaped, badly-wrapped present that sat in it. All of the gifts he had given outside of Ruby, Yang, and Tai’s had been last minute, but this was probably the worst; he hadn’t even bought it. He was worried what Ozpin would think, desperately hoping he knew him well enough to have accurately predicted his reaction.

And that was the thing; he wasn’t sure anymore. Some days Oz would come into the bar and stay for an hour and they’d talk non-stop the entire time. Other days he’d barely stay twenty minutes, and conversation would be quiet and brief. He was unpredictable, and all Qrow knew was that he still didn’t know Ozpin as well as he wanted to. Whatever threads that connected them were thin. He got the impression they were fraying, but maybe that was just paranoia. It wouldn’t stop him desperately trying to pull the stitches taut.

Qrow found it incredible how much light one person could bring to a life he hadn’t even noticed was so dark. It wasn’t just the bar; they’d kept meeting whenever they could, some of the cafes Ozpin liked and Qrow’s favourite bars, walking up in the wooded hills and returning to the Lookout more than once. Qrow had felt safe, he always felt safe with him, for reasons he couldn’t articulate. It was more primal than words allowed, an inimitable sense of belonging that he hadn’t felt since he’d left Patch. And even though things had been stagnating, he was determined to stoke the fire that he knew was still burning, somewhere.

* * *

 

Even Qrow was surprised at how easily he grinned when Ozpin walked in at four thirty, carrying a small cube wrapped in red paper that he put down on the bar. He didn’t have to say anything for Qrow to make his order anymore; they simply exchanged mug for money with a knowing smile, and Qrow dropped the change into the tip jar himself.

“Kinda late today.” He commented, leaning an elbow on the counter.

Ozpin nodded and wrapped his hands around his mug. “I had a few things to take care of up at the school in preparation for the holidays. Then I drove Oscar home to pack.”

“To pack?” Qrow repeated. “What for?”

“Didn’t I mention? We’re going out of town for Christmas. Oscar’s biological grandmother got into contact and invited us to visit her in Seattle.” He paused. “I’m not sure it’s what either of us really want, but he’d like to ‘give her a chance’, in his words.”

“That… sounds complicated.”

“It does. But it’s only a few days; we’ll be back to enjoy our time away from school before long.”

“When do you leave?”

“Tomorrow morning. It’s a six hour drive, and we’re supposed to arrive in the afternoon.”

Qrow nodded and reached down for the gift bag under the bar. “Well, it’s a good thing I brought this in, then.” He took out the parcel and the three cards and slid them over to Ozpin, who smiled curiously at him.

“I see you and I are very in tune.” Oz gestured to the little red box and pushed it gently over, then pulled the items Qrow was offering closer. “Thank you very much.”

“Oh. Yeah, thank _you_.” Qrow picked up the gift he’d been offered. There was an envelope underneath, and it was unadorned, other than a small note in silver marker that stated his name. “You didn’t have to.”

“Neither did you. But you did.” He put a little pressure on the soft parcel, squeezing it gently, then frowned up at Qrow.

Qrow laughed, he couldn’t restrain it; there was something funny about normally-dignified Ozpin trying to figure out what was inside the bright paper decorated with Christmas trees. Especially when he already knew what it was. “You can open it, if you’re that keen.” He finally said. “It’s not exactly a traditional gift.”

“Well, now you’ve really piqued my interest.” Ozpin turned the parcel over to get to the tape, but paused. “Are you sure this is alright?”

“It’s your gift, you can do what you want with it.”

He nodded and began to carefully pull the tape away from the paper, the design coming away with it. As the contents became visible, his eyes widened, and he paused to look up at Qrow with a slightly disconcerted expression. “Qrow.” He said flatly.

Qrow bit his lip, but couldn’t quite restrain a grin. “Yeah?”

Ozpin began to laugh, bending his head over the gift and pulling his long black scarf out of the paper. “Do you know how long I’ve been looking for this?” He asked. “I _completely_ forgot that I had lent it to you.” He met Qrow’s eye with sharp humour in his gaze. “Not a traditional gift, indeed.”

“You like it, then?” Qrow pushed his luck, relieved that he had predicted his reaction correctly.

“Well, it’ll certainly be welcome over the holidays, I’m sure.” Oz wrapped the scarf around his neck and tucked the ends into his jacket. “Thank you for finally returning my property to me.” He said sarcastically.

“You’re welcome, Oz. I even washed it.”

“Much appreciated. I’ll save the cards until I get home; we usually open them on Christmas Eve, but I suspect we’ll be doing it tonight.” He gestured to the red box on Qrow’s side of the counter. “You can open yours, if you like.”

“Well, it would make things even, but I think I’ll pass. Thought I’d… y’know, open gifts with the family this year.”

“Oh, of course! Is it tomorrow that Taiyang comes home?”

“Yeah, tomorrow afternoon. The kids have been falling over themselves excited about it for a week.” Qrow smiled. “Pretty excited myself, to be honest.”

“As you should be; it’s been a long time since you’ve seen him. And I’m sure he’s looking forward to seeing you all again, too.”

“Yeah. I'd hope so.”

He wasn’t as hopeful as he should have been, though; the fact was, his last few sparse conversations with Tai had been pretty strained, as Qrow had been in and out of very high and very low moods and Tai had been consistently stressed. Tai would be thrilled to see Ruby and Yang again, he’d be over the damn moon, but Qrow was basically just a background feature, he was sure of that. Things had changed so much since he’d gone to China; even though they’d been living apart for eight years, when Tai had been in Patch they’d talked constantly. Stupid texts at stupid times of day, sending each other pictures of dogs they found online, heartfelt conversations that came from nowhere and ended just as quickly. Now if there was a text at a stupid time of day it was because one of them was awake when they shouldn’t be or there was an emergency.

Qrow talked to Ozpin about Oscar and his grandmother, their trip to Seattle, the logistics of it all. He started drinking again as he listened, chasing whiskey with one of the more expensive sodas now Salem wasn’t here to catch him. Ozpin didn’t say anything; in fact, his expression barely changed, though his eyes followed the path of the flask. Qrow got the feeling of being studied again, like he’d turned see-through under the liquid gold, something that didn’t bother him anymore. It felt warm and honest now.

“I meant to ask,” Oz began. “How is your friend James getting on with his new house?”

Qrow surfaced from his thoughts. “Oh, uh… yeah, fine, I think. He’s busy. I went to help him out this morning but he’s got a ways to go.”

“Well, Rome wasn’t built in a day. I’m sure he appreciated your assistance anyway.”

“Sure, I think so.” He shrugged. “He invited us over, but I don’t know if we’re gonna make it. Ruby and Yang will wanna go, and I wanna go, but Tai doesn’t know him too well. And since Tai’s only here for twelve days I’m gonna defer to what he wants.”

“Maybe you could go with the girls. Taiyang might appreciate some alone time.”

“No, I doubt it, he’ll wanna spend as much time with them as possible.” His eyebrows knitted and he leaned on the bar again. “If I go alone Penny will be upset that Ruby and Yang didn’t come. Probably best we don’t bother.”

“That’s very pragmatic of you. But won’t James’ feelings be hurt if you don’t show up?”

“He’s pretty used to it at this point. We’re both flakes.”

Ozpin didn’t reply, just drained the last of his cocoa, his eyes fixed on where Qrow’s gift still sat on the counter by the register. After a long pause, he put down his mug and spoke again. “I’ll have to go. I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow.”

“Yeah, of course.” Qrow hesitated for a moment, then walked out from behind the bar; Salem wasn’t here to stop him.

Oz looked up, surprised, but then seemed to understand, as he stood and they embraced. His left hand went to the small of Qrow’s back, his right on the back of his head, slowly flattening down the untidy spikes of hair there until his hand rested on the nape of his neck.

A shiver went down Qrow’s spine, and it took him a moment to find his voice. “Happy holidays, Oz.”

“And a happy holidays to you, too.” He pulled away and smiled warmly, absent-mindedly trailing a hand down Qrow’s left arm. “Take care of yourself, and your family.”

“I will. You stay safe in Seattle.”

He nodded and picked up his cane and Christmas cards from the counter. “Thank you. When does the bar open again?”

“We’re open New Year’s Eve, then we officially open again on January third. That’s the day Tai goes back to China, though, so I’ll be back on the fourth.”

“I see. In that case, maybe I’ll hold off until then.” Ozpin smiled shrewdly in a way that made Qrow’s lungs constrict.

“Well, I’ll be here on New Year’s Eve if you’re that desperate to see me.” He raised his eyebrows suggestively.

Oz laughed. “I think I’ll manage. New Year celebrations have never been my favourite.” He dipped his head in a sort of appreciative nod that made his hair fall over his eyes. “Thank you, Qrow. I’ll see you again soon.”

“Yeah. See you later.” Qrow stood and watched him leave, then became aware that several customers at nearby tables were looking at him. He hurried back behind the bar and ran a hand through his hair, still feeling the chill at the back of his neck where Ozpin had touched him.

* * *

 

He thought about their conversation for hours, overanalysing every word, every pause and glance, until he had thought through so many meanings that he was further from an answer than he had been before. The little sliver of hope he’d been maintaining had grown a little, though; there was no denying the suggestion in Ozpin’s ‘holding off’ on the bar. Still, he kept going back and forth on doubt, unable to stop thinking about it, unable to stop his heart rate increasing every time.

He drank slowly and steadily until his break at eight, at which point he ate whilst helping Amber clear out the cooler as Winter served drinks. They had stopped food service early to get ready for the long vacation; the freezer could stay full, but the fridge had to be emptied. Most of what was left went into a trash bag ready to go in the dumpster, but there were a few items that could be salvaged, including an industrial-sized bag of shredded cheese that Amber claimed, and some of yesterday’s pastries that Qrow decided to take home.

When his break was over he eased up on the limits he’d set himself, and drank at a pace that suited him better. His flask emptied quickly, but with Salem not around, he could take spirits from the bar as long as he paid for them. It was costly, but he emptied the last dregs of a bottle of bourbon and opened another, and after a while the grating Christmas music didn’t bother him and he was just as comfortably dizzy as most of his patrons.

By close, Qrow felt great: optimistic, happy, and teetering on the edge of browning out. He was starving, so he threw the leftover pastries he’d claimed into his empty gift bag, and put his flask on top. Then, carefully, he added the little red box, which he’d kept sitting on the corner of the counter all day. He smiled affectionately at it, then turned out all the lights, picked up the bag, and left. His hands were clumsy as he fumbled with the keys to lock the back door, and the chill breeze outside didn’t help. Finally, he walked away from the bar, stumbling slightly as he made his way home.

The apartment was comfortably warm when he entered, and he made his way straight to the kitchen area to heat up his pastries and eat before bed. Ruby and Yang were both sitting in the living room, Yang on the couch and Ruby curled up in the armchair. Qrow was so distracted by seeing them still up that he tripped over the coffee table, landing on his left knee and letting out a pained string of expletives.

Yang sighed. “Hi, Uncle Qrow.”

“Qrow, are you drunk?” Ruby asked accusatively.

He frowned at her sideways, wishing Summer hadn’t passed on her perception. “Maybe.”

“What? You’re driving us to Portland in like, eleven hours!” Yang exclaimed.

“It’s fine, I’ll be fine.” He got up, still massaging his knee, picked up his dropped gift bag, and wandered over to the kitchen area. He rinsed his flask out and stood it upside down on the drying rack, then unwrapped the two pastries and put them in the microwave. “Anyway, why are you two still up?”

“We couldn’t sleep.” Ruby piped up. “We were gonna have warm milk or something.”

“Oh. Well, be my guest.” Qrow gestured at the fridge. “Don’t stay up too late, though, we’ve got eight hours driving tomorrow, it’s gonna be miserable enough as it is.”

“Yeah, but Dad will be with us for the trip back! It’ll be great.”

The microwave beeped, and Qrow sighed. “Right.”

“What’s your problem?” Yang asked. “Every time we mention Dad lately you go quiet, what is going on?”

“It’s nothing.” He said, with rather too much force. The fight went out of him as soon as he realised how rude he was being. “Sorry, kid, I’m not…” He trailed off.

“Aren’t you excited to see him again?” Her voice was sad and quiet.

“Yeah, I am.” Qrow retrieved his food and sat down at the dining table. “But I’m not sure he’s that excited to see me.”

“Are you kidding me?” Ruby almost shouted, waving her arms. “He’s been talking about you non-stop!”

“What?”

“Yeah, he never shuts up about you when he texts us.” Yang folded her arms and tilted her head. “Why didn’t you think he was excited to see you?”

“Cause he barely talks to me anymore.” He shook his head. “That fucking idiot. Don’t tell him I called him that.” He pointed to his nieces, but he was smiling now.

“Just eat and go to bed. You need to be sober to drive.”

Qrow nodded, feeling somewhat chagrined by his seventeen year old niece knowing better than him. Still, it had been a very long day, and he was exhausted. Knowing that Tai didn’t have any hard feelings towards him had given him a little drive, but what he wanted most right now was his bed. He ate quickly, and bid the kids goodnight, taking his neatly-wrapped gift back to his bedroom with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's what I think about Qrow: He's a fairly thoughtful giver of gifts, but the better he knows someone/the more he likes them, the more likely they end up with a 'panic gift' because there were too many good options and he couldn't choose so the gift ends up either being impersonal or a gag. Good thing Ozpin took it well, huh?


	18. The Past as Quicksand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow fetches Tai from the airport, and they get to talk honestly for the first time in months. Warnings: Nightmares, mentions of death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of location based stuff in this chapter. Disclaimer: I'm from the UK and my only resource for any of this was google street view. You don't even wanna know how many hours I virtually drove around Portland and up and down I-5. If you know the area, god I'm sorry, everything is probably wrong.

_She was sitting there in the passenger seat, like she’d never been gone. Her hair hanging down over her face, silver eyes tracking back and forth under long lashes as she read a book. All the air went out of Qrow’s lungs and he blinked, over and over, expecting her to disappear like she always did. She was still, silent, never acknowledging him. But she was there._

_The traffic let up and he didn’t speak to her as they started to move faster again, just kept glancing in her direction, always half-expecting her to be gone, or to become mutilated as she often was. They drove and drove, surroundings barely seeming to change. There was an on-ramp coming up. And then the truck was sideways, crushed in from the right side, and Qrow was screaming with a voice that wasn’t his, and it was suddenly night, and there was a blanket on the road-_

* * *

 

He woke with tears in his eyes and sat up too quickly, sending his head pounding as his alarm blared. With quivering hands, he switched it off, then leant over with his fingers twisted painfully into his hair, blinking rapidly. It had seemed so real, the parts of the highway he’d recognised and the way she’d looked, it was too much. He didn’t have time, but he let himself cry a little, his hungover emotions heightened enough for it to happen easily. It was almost comforting to feel his eyes and throat burn, and know he was awake.

When he’d collected himself, he hurriedly showered and got ready for the day, downing painkillers and travel-sickness pills and borrowing Yang’s backpack to carry a few bottles of water and sports drinks. She asked him if he was alright, and he assured her that he was fine, his voice scratchy. He was sure she was wondering about his hangover, but the look in her eye was so familiarly shrewd that he felt she was reading his mind about the nightmare. He sort of wished he could tell her, to share the burden of it with someone without it traumatising her.

Once she and Ruby had picked up phones, headphones, and everything else they needed, they piled into the truck and set off. Qrow was a little worried about where Tai’s luggage was going to go, especially as it started to rain, but he had a tarp and some tie-downs if he had to put it in the bed. In the meantime, he had to focus on getting to Portland. He was relieved that his head wasn’t spinning, but it would take a while for his painkillers to kick in. As Vale disappeared behind them, he glanced at the front passenger seat, just once. It was empty. It wouldn’t be for long.

* * *

 

They made a stop in Sunnyside after an uneventful two hours, forcing Qrow’s mind off his nightmare as he tried to keep track of Ruby and Yang at the gas station. They had already eaten lunch, but now that Qrow’s nausea had subsided, he was starving, and he grabbed a sandwich before they set off again. Traffic was a little worse when they crossed into Salem city limits, and only escalated as they passed through; there had been a pile up going the opposite way, and rubberneckers were slowing everything down. Qrow kept his speed up and his eyes forward as he passed; the silent ambulance he’d seen from further back had been enough.

He always drove carefully; one of the only times in his life that he wasn’t reckless was behind the wheel. But the nightmare and the accident in combination had him on edge, and he found himself paying careful attention to the mile markers, eyeing every driver around him like they were about to cut him off. He had never been so glad to see the road signs that indicated Portland was close.

Yang’s phone rang before they got near the airport, and she hurriedly unplugged her headphones to answer it. Qrow kept his eye out for the off-ramp that would take him over the highway and down towards the airport while she passed on Tai’s directions. He got overtaken on the inside lane by an expensive sports car doing well over the limit, and laid on the horn.

“Fucking asshole!” He growled.

There was a pause, and Yang piped up: “Dad said watch your mouth.”

Qrow didn’t reply, just gritted his teeth and tightened his grip on the steering wheel as Yang continued to call out directions. He cursed a few more times as he circled the extensive airport campus, Tai’s directions often too vague or Yang calling them out too late. Ruby kept giggling from behind him, whether at him or Yang’s exasperated dialogue with their dad, he didn’t know. But on top of everything else, it was stressing him out.

When they finally reached the pickup point, Qrow sighed and turned off the engine, feeling tension drain out of him. Then he turned to look at his nieces, Yang still on the phone with Tai.

“Wait until he gets here before you go anywhere, they aren’t gonna want us staying long.”

“He said he’s on his way.” Yang listened for a minute. “Yeah, okay. Well, we’re in Uncle Qrow’s truck, you can’t miss us. Okay, see you soon.” She hung up.

“There he is!” Ruby cried. She was pointing out of the window, and unfastened her seatbelt.

“Kid, hang on, hang on.”

It was too late: She was out of the truck, sprinting along the walkway and dodging other travellers as she went.

“Alright. Come on, Yang.” They followed Ruby out of the truck, Qrow locking it behind him as they jogged to keep up with her. Then he finally saw him.

Taiyang was dishevelled from the flight, his once-neat shirt crumpled, his hair messy, blue eyes tired and bloodshot. But when he saw Ruby running at him he beamed, throwing his arms wide and dropping his luggage to lift her off the ground as she hit him, making him stumble back slightly. Their combined laughter was loud under the awning. As Qrow watched, smiling fondly, Yang dashed past him, running to join her family, wrapping one arm around Ruby, one around Tai.

Qrow walked around them and grabbed Tai’s suitcase, holdall, and backpack from the ground where he’d abandoned them, and made his way back to the truck.

_Let them have their moment_ , he thought.

He realised his chest was hurting, a kind of yearning tinged with anxiety. More than anything in the world, he wanted to hug Tai like that. But if there wasn’t a problem between them, then why had Tai been talking _about_ him and not _to_ him? Would he even want Qrow to hug him anymore? It seemed like they’d drifted so far apart, even further than the Pacific Ocean had separated them. He ducked his head as he carefully tied down the suitcase and holdall, then placed the backpack in the front passenger foot well.

“Qrow?” Tai’s voice came from behind him.

Qrow turned to see him standing a few feet away, left arm around Ruby’s shoulders and Yang at his right. He almost teared up again seeing them like that, all three with expressions like sunny skies, grins that could light fires. “Yeah?” He croaked.

“Well… Don’t you wanna say hi?”

He smiled and closed the space between them, and Tai let go of Ruby to embrace him. Qrow placed his right hand on the back of Tai’s head, knitted his fingers into the loose curls there, breathed him in for a moment. “Welcome back, Tai.” He mumbled.

Tai chuckled quietly. “Thanks.” Finally, they let go of one another, and Tai grabbed Qrow’s wrist for a second. “I’ve missed you.”

“Yeah. We’ve missed you too.” He smiled.

* * *

 

Qrow drove to a fast food restaurant before they left the city, and they went inside to sit at a low table while they ate soggy fries and burgers that didn’t look like the pictures on the menu. Tai crammed himself between Ruby and Yang on the bench on one side while Qrow sat on the other, quietly watching them smile together. Tai told stories about his classes in China and the girls told stories about their classes at Beacon, and Qrow just laughed now and then, added a joke here and there. Part of him felt even lonelier than before, but another felt he’d be content for this to last forever.

It was dark when they left the restaurant, and rush hour was starting, the highway out of Portland gridlocked. Qrow turned off and took them through the city another way, mostly using residential streets at Tai’s direction. They re-joined the I-5 in the suburbs, and the drive got easier, or at least more predictable, and he found himself happy to just listen to Tai, Ruby, and Yang all quietly chatting, Tai craning his neck around from the front passenger seat. It was comfortable, familiar; while he was mostly left out, Qrow felt at home.

It was nearly nine by the time they got back to Vale, and Qrow’s eyes and hands hurt from so long stiffly focused on the road. Ruby had fallen asleep in the backseat with her headphones half-on, the band dropped over her eyes. Yang kept glancing at the rear view mirror, where she could undoubtedly see her father’s reflection as he sat facing forward in front of her. Everyone was quiet now; there was only the rattle of the engine in the night.

When they reached Bayside Apartments, rather than having Yang and a groggy Ruby wait in the cold parking lot, Qrow tossed them his keys.

“Let yourselves in, I’ll help your dad with his luggage.”

Yang nodded, unlocked the main door, and propped it open, before leading Ruby upstairs.

Qrow untied the tarp from the top of Tai’s bags. The rain had stopped now, and the clouds dissipated, leaving behind a deep chill in the air that threatened black ice come morning. Tai stood on the other side of the truck bed as Qrow heaved his luggage down.

“God, I forgot how nice it is to see the stars.” He almost whispered, staring up into the sky.

Qrow, who had been about to sarcastically ask for a hand, just nodded. “Yeah. They’re bright around here, huh?”

“Yeah.” Tai smiled across at Qrow. “You know, I never thought I could miss the Big Dipper.” He laughed.

“Me neither.” Qrow quirked an eyebrow. “Is it really that bad in Qingdao?”

Tai’s smile faded as Qrow handed him his holdall. “It’s the smog and the light pollution. You never see anything but the city glowing.”

They headed up to the apartment, closing the main door behind them. The stairs felt endless with Tai’s heavy suitcase in his hand, but he didn’t complain, just led Tai to the door labelled 302 off the third floor landing. They stopped in the living room, where Qrow found his keys on the coffee table and the girls nowhere to be seen. Then he showed Tai to his own bedroom, which he’d tidied for the occasion. Unfortunately, his clothes from last night were still on the floor, and his gift from Ozpin on the bedside table. He moved them, showed Tai to the bathroom so that he could shower, and put clean sheets on the bed like it was any other day.

* * *

 

They stayed up late; Tai was jet-lagged, and while Qrow was tired, he was happy to stay up with him. He couldn’t go to sleep until he left anyway, not now the couch was his bed for two weeks. He consumed several coffees, interspersed and sometimes spiked with whiskey, which made Tai look at him under a frown that spoke of sadness.

They ended up on the couch together after a while: Tai sat mostly normally, a little slouched, as Qrow laid across the rest of the cushions with his head on Tai’s lap, legs hanging over the arm of the couch. Every now and then he caught Tai’s eye and smiled up at him, feeling eighteen again, young and grateful for anyone who gave him the time of day.

“You look like hell, Qrow.” Tai finally said, resting his left hand on Qrow’s head.

Qrow narrowed his eyes and squinted at him. “What? I look great.”

“You look tired.” Tai corrected, and ran his fingers through Qrow’s hair. “Even more than me.”

“I’m fine, Tai. _I_ didn’t just get off a sixteen hour flight.”

“No, but you have been looking after two teenage girls for four months, all on your own.” There was humour in his voice. “I know how exhausting that is, even _without_ getting stabbed and nearly losing your job in the process.” He softened, smiling. “How are you doing?”

Qrow sighed. “I am tired. But it’s worth it. It’s all been worth it.”

“I’m glad. But that doesn’t actually answer my question, does it?”

“Everything’s fine. I promise.” He sighed. “I’ve been talking to someone, anyway.”

“Really? I thought you hated therapy?”

“I do. It’s not really therapy.” He paused, chewing his lip. “I met someone who… he’s trained as a counsellor. He’s a good friend. We talk now and then. He helps me out.”

“Oh, yeah, you told me about this, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” Qrow looked up at Tai again, meeting his eye with what he knew was a melancholy expression, something he couldn’t restrain. “I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you mean?” Tai’s fingers tightened on his scalp.

He sighed again, deeper and pained. “I’ve got feelings for him. I don’t know what to say or do.”

Tai laughed deeply, heartily. “What do you mean you don’t know what to do? Seduce him like you seduce everyone, you fucking idiot.”

“It’s not like that.” Qrow shook his head, and Tai moved his hand away. “He’s not… someone I can just fuck and forget about.”

There was a long silence, broken only by the near-mute volume of the television, a newscaster talking to himself.

“Like me, you mean.” Tai intoned.

Qrow just nodded.

“Well, just tell him that. The worst you can get is a no.”

“I don’t want the no.”

Tai raised his eyebrows. “You’d rather just… string him along?”

“Yeah.”

He sighed, and rested his right hand on Qrow’s chest, over his heart and the tattoo there. “You can’t live your life like that, Qrow. How are you ever gonna find the love you want if you aren’t willing to give it?”

Qrow didn’t speak, just placed his hand over Tai’s and sighed.

“You’ve got a bad habit of thinking you’re worthless. You’ve always been… I don’t know. What’s the opposite of a narcissist?”

“Misanthropist?”

“Well, yeah, that too. But… You punish yourself for things that are normal. You don’t _have_ to be perfect. There are people out there who’ll love you for your imperfections.”

“Even the alcohol?”

Tai sighed deeply. “Yeah. Even that.” He shrugged. “I did. Summer did.”

Qrow’s eyebrows raised and knitted sadly at the mention of her name. “I just don’t understand why.”

“Because you’re amazing, Qrow.” He shook his head, and bit his lip like he was holding something back, then looked up and away from meeting Qrow’s eye. “We both saw something in you, and we weren’t wrong. There’s more good in you than you care to see.”

“I just don’t know how someone could look in the mirror and see… this…” Qrow gestured at himself. “And like it.”

Tai just shook his head again, moving his other hand up to his face.

Qrow stared up at him, square jaw set, blue eyes bright and a little wet as he wiped at them. His own lip quivered. “Tai?”

“If you really care about this guy, tell him.” Tai said firmly. “Let him know. Either he’ll stick with you or he’ll move away, and either one will be the right thing to do, for him.” He looked down and met Qrow’s eye again. “Don’t torture yourself with uncertainty.”

“Tai-”

“We don’t have a good record when it comes to not communicating.” His voice was low and sharp. “Tell him.”

Qrow quailed, and extracted his shaking hand from Tai’s. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Of course you do.” He shook his head, a small smile emerging. “Hey, do you remember when we met? And you were so scared you couldn’t even look me in the eye?”

“What’s that got to do with anything?”

“More than you think.” Tai almost laughed again. “We were both scared. I was just better at hiding it. You never learnt how.”

“What do you mean?”

“You still can’t hide. That’s what I mean.” He chuckled. “You’re not as good at pretending not to feel anything as you think you are. This guy, your friend, probably already knows how you feel.”

Qrow opened his mouth and frowned, more offended than he’d expected. “That’s rude. Anyway, I’m not _that_ obvious.”

“Bull _shit_ , buddy. You’re transparent as glass and you know it. You just don’t wanna admit it.”

Qrow growled, but couldn’t restrain a smirk. He’d always known he couldn’t withhold anything from someone he’d known for so long, but that didn’t stop him trying.

“You’ve always been a terrible liar.” Tai teased.

“And you’ve always believed me anyway.” Qrow prodded him in the ribs to watch him squirm. “Asshole.”

“Dickhead.”

* * *

 

They sat together for hours, conversation turning from serious to a series of mocking jokes at one another’s expense, Qrow poking fun at Tai’s tendency to forgive anything and Tai prodding at Qrow’s hard-headedness. It was past 3 am when Tai finally got up and decided to go to bed, by which time Qrow was deep into his drunkenness. They stood up together, Qrow swaying slightly.

“God, please go to bed, Qrow.” Tai groaned. “I know it’s nearly Christmas, but look at you.”

“I’m fine.” Qrow slurred. “S’not _your_ problem, anyway.”

“Of course it’s my problem.” He shook his head. “Have you been like this every day since I left?”

“No. No, I promise I’m usually better than this, it’s just…” He trailed off, distracted, and took Tai’s hand in both of his. “You’re here.”

Tai seemed to melt slightly, his upright posture slumping into something softer. “You’re gonna be the death of me.” He whispered.

“I know.” Qrow murmured, and stepped forward to hug him.

“I love you.” Tai mumbled into his shoulder, arms tightening around Qrow’s waist.

“I love you too.” He buried his face in the crook of Tai’s neck, closing his eyes against him, feeling his own breath and Tai’s pulse hot against his cheek.

“I know.” He laughed.

“Go to bed.” Qrow dragged himself out of his best friend’s arms. “We can talk more tomorrow if you want.”

“Yeah. Yeah, we can.” Tai sighed, his expression downturned, but somewhat hopeful as he met Qrow’s eye. “Just…” He squeezed his eyes shut briefly. “I know you can do better, Qrow. We both can. Let’s try.”

“Yeah.” Qrow tried for a smile. “Yeah, let’s.”

Tai looked up at him, and finally let go to leave the living room, closing the door behind him. Qrow slumped back down on the couch, hands over his eyes. Tai always made him think a lot harder about himself than he wanted to, and now he was starting to remember all the worried, disappointed looks he’d received tonight.

He had to have another drink before he could sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly this chapter was one of the hardest so far to write just because I had to try to express the depth of Tai and Qrow's relationship without having experienced anything like it. I was trying to show their long history, the past of romance that's left vestiges behind that go deeper than a 'usual' platonic relationship. Like, they've never really lost the kind of constant affection they always used to have, but also the extent of it here is out of character and came about because they're both in a vulnerable state after being apart for so long. It's unconventional, that's all I can really say. Maybe it comes across in the text better than it seems to me, but I just wanted to explain that a little.


	19. Celebration and Solitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow celebrates the holidays with his family, but tension lies below the surface.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everybody loves a completely mistimed seasonal chapter, right? There's lots of domestic fluff in this one, though, and a look at how Tai and Qrow interact on a more normal day. I hope you enjoy it!

Qrow didn’t get much time alone with Tai over the next two days, as they all prepared for Christmas. They did a last minute grocery shop, then came home to decorate the apartment. Qrow didn’t have a tree, there wasn’t space for one anyway, but Yang hung up tinsel in the windows while Ruby stuck a string of lights around the edge of the ceiling. They baked a few things together, all four of them cramming into the kitchenette while Ruby took the lead in making sugar cookies, fruit cake, and gingerbread. They decorated them all, until every surface was covered in drying snacks, from Tai’s patient, complex-patterned sugar cookie trees to Qrow’s clumsy, over-frosted gingerbread men.

Christmas Eve arrived, and Qrow took out the already-wrapped gifts he’d been hiding in his closet and arranged them on the coffee table. Ruby and Yang disappeared into their room to wrap theirs, and Tai brought out his holdall to reveal the gifts inside, all wrapped in yellow and gold paper. He stacked them all on the table, rearranging Qrow’s too, so that each person’s was in a separate corner. Qrow put his gift from Ozpin on top of his own pile, where it was swiftly buried when Ruby and Yang added theirs for him on top.

They relaxed, and Qrow mostly kept to himself, always taking the armchair when Tai and the girls wanted to sit and talk on the couch, leaving the room to read so they could watch what they wanted on TV. There wasn’t much space for him to get away, especially not with Tai staying in his room, but he tried to give it to them where he could. Part of him felt a little unwelcome in his own home, but he refused to let it get it to him, even as Tai avoided meeting his eye at the dinner table. Qrow sat in the hallway that night with a double whiskey and a book he wasn’t really reading, knees drawn up to his chest on the laminate, wondering why everything seemed to have changed so dramatically. If he was just looking at it all wrong.

* * *

 

He was woken on Christmas morning by Ruby and Yang entering the living room, whispering in tones that weren’t as quiet as they’d probably imagined. He squinted in the light they turned on and complained about the time, but as he sat up and wrapped his blanket around his shoulders, he had to smile. The childlike joy in their eyes: That was something most kids lost as they grew, and he was glad Tai had never let it die in them. They sat on either side of him on the couch and hugged him and wished him a merry Christmas, and he felt warmer than he had in days.

They drank coffee and waited for Tai to get up, and Ruby sat on the floor by the table and squeezed all the presents in her corner trying to figure out what they were. Qrow waved her hands away but kept looking over and catching her at it again. When Tai wandered into the living room at nearly eight, he seemed surprised to see everyone already up, but he grinned as Yang and Ruby leapt to their feet to greet him.

They cooked breakfast, sausage and bacon and eggs that made Tai grimace at the fat in the frying pan, but Qrow just nudged him away and told him not to think about it. If he couldn’t eat like shit over the holidays, when would he ever? Tai didn’t have an answer for that, and when they sat down to eat he cleared his plate just as quickly as the girls. He complimented Qrow on the eggs as they rinsed the plates for the dishwasher, and Qrow just smirked. It was Tai who had taught him to cook them like that in the first place, way back when they were nineteen and sharing a place.

Finally, to Ruby and Yang’s excitement, they sat down to open gifts, a stop-motion Christmas movie playing at low volume on the TV. At first, Qrow and Tai just watched them, as they opened cards filled with cash from various relatives and the plush stuffed animals and boxes of candy Qrow had given them. From Tai, they each unwrapped a thick sweater, new sneakers, and a laptop. They were small things, thin notebooks that Tai stressed were really only for homework and browsing and couldn’t support video games, but neither Ruby nor Yang was discouraged; they practically suffocated him by hugging him to express their thanks.

Qrow and Tai opened their gifts from the girls next: Tai received a pair of recipe books from Ruby and an enormous amount of socks in every possible colour from Yang.

“You said that’s what you wanted.” She shrugged.

Qrow was sure the girls had coordinated their gifts to him, as Yang had gotten him a new windbreaker coat, Ruby a warm maroon scarf and black gloves. He tried them all on for size over his pyjamas, immediately sweating in the warm apartment. As he took them off, he thanked them profusely, trying to direct his praise to Tai too. After all, it was his cash that had paid for the gifts.

They disappeared back to their bedroom to set up their laptops with gifts balanced precariously in their arms, Tai grimacing at the way Ruby stacked everything on top of the box the expensive gift was in. Qrow laughed and patted his shoulder reassuringly, then got up to stuff all the discarded wrapping paper into a trash bag before they opened the last few gifts. Tai had two left, both from Qrow, whereas Qrow had two from Tai and the box from Ozpin. He’d become determined to save that one until last.

He sat on the far left of the couch with Tai at the other end, and carefully picked up the larger of the yellow-wrapped gifts. It was soft, and he looked quizzically over it at Tai.

“Just open it.” He said with an exasperated smile.

Qrow smirked and obeyed, tearing the paper off a sweater in smart two-tone greys. “Oh.”

“’Oh’? Is that it?” Tai teased.

“No, sorry. It’s nice. Thanks.” He held it up against himself.

“Yeah, you told me about that cardigan you lost when… You know.” Tai pointed at Qrow’s right side. “It took me forever but I managed to find something similar to it so you can look smart at work again.”

Qrow felt his expression soften. He’d almost forgotten about the cardigan, the one Tyrian had pulled off him and that he hadn’t seen since. That Tai had kept it in mind for so long was touching; it almost made him feel guilty. “Thank you.”

“Try it on, will you? I wanna see if it fits.”

He threw it on over his tank top; it was thin and breathable enough that it didn’t make him too hot. It would be perfect to wear behind the bar. “Looks like it.” He plucked at the fabric and chuckled. “I guess everyone wants me to stay warm this year.”

“Yeah, well look at you.” Tai reached across and pinched at Qrow’s wrist. “You’re skin and bones, you need _something_.”

“Oh, shut up, just cause you could bench me.” He tugged the sweater off and folded it neatly.

“Excuse you. I could bench _two_ of you.”

“Bullshit.” Qrow balled up the wrapping paper and tossed it in Tai’s direction, then picked up the second, smaller gift. It was a little cube, like Ozpin’s, this one denser. He shook it gently, but it didn’t make a sound.

“Don’t do that!” Tai exclaimed, and Qrow’s eyes went wide.

“Is it breakable?”

“I’m not sure.”

Nervously, he tore the paper off, revealing a black card box, which he opened to find jeweller’s foam. When he pulled it out, there was a small green figurine beneath, a dragon-like creature with antlers, cloven hooves, a mane, and similar tufts of carven fur on its legs and tail. He found it intact, and carefully removed it from the box. It fit into the palm of his hand with space to spare.

“It’s a qilin.” Tai said quietly. “A Chinese mythological creature. Supposedly, they can appear in households ruled by a wise, benevolent leader. They’re good omens. And this one’s made of jade, which makes it doubly lucky.”

“Jesus, Tai. How much did this set you back?” Qrow inspected the tiny snarl on the qilin’s face.

“That doesn’t matter.”

Qrow sighed, but nodded. “Well, thanks. Here, let me put it somewhere safe.” He got up and perched the statue on his desk, tucked in between his keyboard and the PC tower where it wouldn’t be knocked off.

“It looks good up there. Like it belongs.” Tai observed.

“It does.” Qrow sat down again, threw away his wrapping paper, and turned expectantly to Tai, hands on his knees. “Your turn.”

“Alright.” Both of Qrow’s gifts to Tai were in small boxes, but he picked up the slightly larger of the two first, quickly tearing the paper off and revealing an embossed silver symbol underneath. Inside, an elegant gold watch with a black face quietly ticked against a bed of faux velvet.

“It’s nothing special.” Qrow said quickly. “Y’know, it’s no luxury item, but it works, and it’ll last, and I know you keep talking about how you need a new one so-”

“Qrow, shut up!” Tai laughed. “It’s great. Stop qualifying it. Thank you.” He took the watch out and fastened it around his left wrist, then fiddled with the crown. “You could have at least put the time right, though.”

“Sorry. Didn’t think about it.”

“It’s alright.” He pushed it down on his wrist slightly and smiled, then picked up his last gift. “Is this one jewellery too?” He joked.

Qrow just shrugged expressively and watched as he repeated the process, tearing off the paper and opening the small padded box beneath. The pendant was gold, a richer shade than the watch, a circle embossed with the image of Saint Christopher. Around the edges, his name was printed, along with the words ‘protect us’, and two tiny crucifixes. The chain was delicate and thin, mostly hidden behind the foam.

The room was silent for a long moment, Tai frowning at the box.

“I know you’re not religious.” Qrow finally said. “But Saint Christopher is supposed to protect travellers. I thought it might… comfort you?” He shrugged again.

Tai took out the necklace and put it on, dropping it beneath his shirt collar. “Thank you.” He said quietly.

“You’re welcome, Tai.”

He smirked, then huffed a laugh, getting his humour back. “I thought you said you were terrible at giving gifts? You know, I don’t think you’ve ever given me a bad one.”

“Well, you’re one of the lucky ones then.” Qrow joked back, as the atmosphere seemed to return to the room. “I’m glad you like it, though.”

“Yeah, of course I do. It just… hit me kinda hard.” He picked up the last scraps of discarded paper, then pointed at Ozpin’s gift, now sitting alone in the centre of the table. “Aren’t you gonna open that one?”

“Oh. Yeah.” He leaned forward and picked it up, feeling oddly apprehensive. It was similar in weight to the figurine Tai had given him, though balanced differently. He couldn’t even begin to predict what it could be.

“Missed something.” Tai grabbed the envelope that had been hidden beneath it again and handed it over. “Who’s it from?”

“A friend.” Qrow replied cryptically. “The one I was telling you about.”

“Oh. Right.”

He had to scrabble at the tape for a while before he could tear the paper; it had been wrapped with no convenient folds and every join carefully sealed down. Tai laughed and didn’t offer to help as Qrow cursed his name and Ozpin’s in the same breath, grinning as he struggled. Finally, he got in, and unwrapped a box with a stylised watercolour of a bird printed on it.

“No, he didn’t.” Tai laughed at a high pitch.

“Yeah, he did.” Qrow shook his head, unable to suppress a smile as he opened the box and slid out the bubble-wrapped figure. It was a crow, though as he unpacked it, it became clear that it didn’t look much like the image on the box.

It was made of what looked like volcanic glass, black and glossy with depths that suggested clarity. A narrow branch emerged from the base to form a surface that the bird was barely touching, fused to it with only a delicate claw. Its feathers were rendered unrealistically, the outstretched wings and tail seeming to have been smeared backwards, like smudged ink, to give the impression of movement. It was effective overall; it looked dynamic, fluid. It was just the sort of thing Qrow would have expected Ozpin to pick out.

“Oh, it’s kinda pretty actually.” Tai mused. “Can I take a look?”

“Sure.” Qrow handed it over. “Careful though.”

“Yeah, I can see that it’s glass, dummy.” He inspected it closely. “Why are its eyes red?”

Qrow just shrugged and tore open the envelope that had come with the gift, admiring the shape of his name in Ozpin’s looping, right-slanting handwriting. Even that inelegant Q looked pretty, looked like it belonged. The card was simple, depicting a wreath with five candles and the words ‘Merry Christmas’ in cursive, and the message inside was short and kind.

‘ _Qrow,_  
‘ _I truly can’t predict whether you’ll like the gift I picked out for you, though I sincerely hope you do. I walked past it several times before finally picking it up because it seemed to speak of you. Aside from the obvious namesake, the crow shows movement and growth, determination, and playfulness. It seemed like a very plucky bird to me. Hopefully you can see it the same way, or at least find your own meaning in it. I wish you and your family a very happy holidays, and the best of luck for the coming New Year._   
‘ _Best wishes, Ozpin’_

Underneath the main bulk of the message, there were two more words, written in untidy script:

‘ _And Oscar’_

Qrow smiled, had the odd urge to clutch the card to his chest, but resisted. Instead, he stood it up on the coffee table and looked over at Tai, still rotating the figure of the bird as he stared at it. Qrow thought he could sort of see where Oz was coming from: Its red gem eyes glinted with something like courage, but its open beak almost looked like a smile. The trails of its wings were like celebratory streamers, and the possibility of it landing or taking off left an uncertainty in its wake.

Being compared to that ‘plucky’ bird was surprisingly flattering.

“Shit, we’ve gotta start making dinner if we wanna eat before 4 pm.” Tai said suddenly, looking at his watch. He carefully placed the crow down on the coffee table and stood up. “That’s pretty nice, though. Are you gonna keep it around?”

“Yeah, I’ll put it with the… what was it called again?”

“The qilin?” Tai chuckled.

“The qilin.” Qrow nodded and took the crow over to the desk, sitting it beside its jade companion. Its wings towered over the other creature, but they complemented each other, tucked in that little space together. He turned back to Tai. “Why don’t you go take that watch off before you start cooking? I’ve just gotta do something.”

Tai agreed and went to put his watch and necklace in Qrow’s bedroom, leaving him alone.

Hurriedly, he pulled out his phone, and navigated to his text messages with Ozpin. Their last conversation had been a week ago, but he typed out a message now, relying on the phone to correct his hasty misspellings.

‘ **Hey Oz, I opened your gift and just wanted to thank you for being so thoughtful. I really appreciate it, that little bird’s got pride of place. Hope you and Oscar are enjoying Seattle. Happy holidays**.’

He read it over three times and sent it before he could have second thoughts, then tucked his phone back into his pocket as Tai walked back in with Yang and Ruby in tow. They smiled, both carrying their laptops and tucked into their new sweaters.

And Qrow’s heart was very warm.

* * *

 

Dinner was a complicated process, Qrow and Tai hurrying around the too-small kitchen trying to get everything ready at the same time. He was thankful that Ruby and Yang were otherwise occupied; it was nice when they wanted to help, but now was not the time. By the time they sat down to eat at just past two, Qrow had poured himself a large whiskey. To his surprise, Tai asked for one too, waving an empty rocks glass in his direction. It was rare for Tai to drink much, rarer still for him to want whiskey, but Qrow poured him the same generous serving he had given himself, and they sat down to eat.

They continued to drink throughout the afternoon and into the evening, though Tai switched to rum and cola, wondering aloud how Qrow could stand to drink straight whiskey. Qrow tried to stay on his level as evening fell and he started to get genuinely drunk, increasing his pace to reach the same buzz. Tai didn’t drink often enough to have built up much tolerance, and it was hard for Qrow to keep up after a while.

Night fell, and Ruby and Yang went to bed before eleven, tired from their excited early morning. They left the remnants of a board game out on the coffee table, and Qrow clumsily cleaned up, tossing the pieces back into the box while Tai watched. His eyes were a little glazed now, and he was sprawled over half the couch like a Hollywood Roman emperor, elbow on the arm clutching his drink. He was almost smiling.

Qrow slid the box back on top of the bookshelf and collapsed into the armchair. For a moment, none of them spoke, just listened to the faint sound of quiet chatter through the wall. Ruby giggled, but Qrow barely heard it; he was thinking about the airport, the long drive, the nightmare. Tai not speaking to him.

He frowned as he broke the silence. “Tai?”

“Mm?” Tai looked at him sideways.

“Why weren’t you talking to me before you came back?”

He sighed, and it turned into a breathy laugh as he deposited his drink on the table. “It doesn’t really matter. It’s no big deal.”

Qrow blinked at him. “You spoke to me twice in the last three weeks. That feels like a big deal to me.”

“I’ve just been busy. Exams and stuff. That’s all.”

“Is it?”

Tai turned properly to look at him, and the humour was gone from his gaze. “Look, if you really wanna know, I just think…” He set his jaw. “I just think we’ve both changed a lot in the time I’ve been gone. I don’t think we want the same things anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’ve been talking to Ruby and Yang about how things are here, and I don’t think we both have the same focus on keeping them safe.” His voice was hard and steely, but quickly softened. “And I felt bad for looking forward to seeing you when I knew you didn’t care as much.”

“Tai-”

“Don’t deny it!” He shook his head. “I know things have changed. And I don’t think you care about much of anything anymore.”

“That isn’t true.” Qrow growled, insulted. “You think I don’t care about you? About Ruby and Yang?”

“I think you don’t show it!” Tai’s voice pitched up. “You leave them alone almost all the time. Even when you’re not working you go and hang out with your friends instead of taking care of them!”

“They’re old enough to take care of themselves, Tai.”

“They’re not! Not all the time! Anyway, how the hell are you ever gonna take care of them when you’re drunk all the time?” He gestured wildly at Qrow. “Yang told me you got drunk less than _twelve hours_ before you drove up to Portland. Do you have any idea how dangerous that was?”

“I was fine, Tai.”

“You weren’t. You aren’t.” He stood up, scowling. “Look, they’re independent enough to do things on their own, but you still have to be there for them sometimes. You can’t just leave them alone with some old family photos and hope they figure it out!”

“You think I don’t know that?” Qrow exploded, standing to meet Tai’s eye. “You think I can’t tell they’re struggling? I know! I know I should be here, but I work seventy-two hours a week, _every_ goddamn week. I can’t be here all the time. I’m no teacher; I don’t get weekends off, I don’t get three months of vacation a year!”

“Yeah, well maybe if you hadn’t failed out of college in your freshman year you would be by now.” Tai spat.

Qrow breathed heavily, fists clenching. “You dropped out too.”

“I went back! That’s your trouble: You’re a quitter! If you don’t do something right first time you never do it again!” He shook his head and stepped back. “That’s why you kept drinking, isn’t it? Because you knew you’d relapse if you tried to quit, so what was the point in trying?”

“That’s enough!” Qrow snarled. He didn’t have anything else to say; he just wanted Tai to stop, stop telling truths that would hang in the air forever and could never be taken back.

He kept going anyway. “Is that why you keep letting Ruby and Yang struggle on their own? Because you couldn’t help them once, so why keep trying? You figure they’re better off without you? Like Raven?”

Qrow dropped his hands, his eyes widening and shoulders slumping. “Tai, that’s not-”

“Two for two on the Branwens, I guess.” Tai’s voice quietened, but didn’t lose its edge. “You used to be a good parent to them, Qrow. Before you drank this much, before you left. What happened? Do you value getting drunk more than your nieces? Cause that’s how it looks to me.”

“No. You know how important they are to me, you _know_.”

“Then act like it.” Tai hissed. With that, he picked up what was left of his drink and strode over to the kitchen to pour it down the sink. Then he grabbed his phone from the coffee table and walked out of the living room, slamming the door as he went.

Qrow watched him go and stood still for a moment, trembling all over with something that rapidly passed back and forth between anger and fear. He hadn’t expected anything so turbulent, but Tai couldn’t be blamed. There was the terror of it, something that fed back into his own anxiety: that Ruby and Yang might end up like him. Tai was right, and Qrow was wrong, as he always was.

For the second time in a week, Qrow sat down with his head in his hands, and cried with his regret.


	20. Water is Warmer than Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The holidays take a solemn turn. Qrow gets an unwanted phone call and has some hard conversations. Warnings: Nightmares/flashbacks

The apartment was very quiet for the next few days, the words of the argument seeming to be written on the living room walls. Even Ruby and Yang had picked up on it; Qrow didn’t doubt that they had heard the commotion on Christmas night. They had started staying in their room more, leaving the living room if more than one of their guardians entered. Qrow caught Ruby glancing anxiously back at him as Yang pulled her away a couple of times, as he and Taiyang sat in frosty silence.

They were civil to one another, but barely, and only when necessary: A few words exchanged at the dinner table, Qrow lending Tai his keys when he had to run to the convenience store. There was a chill to the atmosphere when they were in a room together, and for the most part, Tai had taken to hiding out in Qrow’s bedroom or sitting with the girls in theirs. And the tides of regret kept rising and rising, flooding up Qrow’s throat so that every second he felt an inch away from bursting into tears again.

But what could he do to fix things? Tai was right, Qrow would quit trying as soon as he failed the first time. Besides which, his problems went much deeper than what could be fixed in a short visit. Sure, he could work on himself, and maybe next time Tai was here, there would be progress to show him. Would Tai even want to come back? Would he even want to go, and leave his daughters in the care of a man he believed had failed them? Qrow wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t, but he did worry. What other options were there?

* * *

 

By the early hours of December thirty-first, Qrow and Tai were still barely speaking. Five days of chilly apathy had worn Qrow down, and he had drunk himself to sleep every night. He was out of whiskey, and had taken to sipping the spiced rum Tai had opened. He kept thinking about cinnamon candy and the taste of home, and old books, and flowers as big as his palm and god, this was worse than the breakup. At least that had been amicable, even if they had both been holding onto things.

His phone rang, and he clumsily slapped his palm down onto it, slid it off the table. An unknown number was calling. He sighed, put down his glass, and answered it.

“Yeah?” He grumbled.

“Hello, little brother.”

Qrow’s blood ran cold, and he stood up, fists clenched like he could fight her from here. “Raven. What do you want?”

“To talk.”

There was a long silence broken only by the crackle of static on the line and Qrow’s heavy breathing as he ran through his options like he was flicking through papers. Finally, he grabbed his keys from the table and ran out of the apartment; if they were going to talk he was going to shout. Better to be outside where no one would hear.

Raven laughed at the sound of his footsteps on the stairs. “What _are_ you doing, Qrow?”

“Shut up.” He hissed, slamming through the main door and stepping out into the cold parking lot. Then he raised his voice to a normal volume. “What the fuck do you want?”

“No ‘hi, how are you’? No, ‘oh Raven, it’s been two years, what’s going on in your world’?”

“It’s been two years for a reason.”

She snorted. “And before that it was fifteen for a similar one. How times change.”

“It was fifteen years because you _disappeared_ , Raven, and we were all better off for it!” He couldn’t restrain the harsh rasp from his voice; anger had let him think clearly, but he was still drunk. “Especially Yang.”

“Oh, you figured out why I’m calling you. Good job.” She replied sarcastically.

“Stop patronising me.” Qrow could almost see the smug little grin on her face, the tormenting narrowed eyes she always gave him. He spoke through gritted teeth. “What’s Yang got to do with anything?”

“I want to talk to her.”

“At 2 am on New Year’s Eve?”

“No, idiot.” There was fire in her voice. “I want you to give me her number so I can contact her. She must have her own phone by now.”

“I’m not gonna fucking do that for you.” He paused, and realised he had an advantage over her. “Why’d you call _me_ for that, anyway? Why not Tai?”

“You think Tai would ever say yes? You really are stupid.” She laughed mirthlessly. “Anyway, I tried him. He’s changed numbers. But you? You’ve always been easy to find, because _you_ don’t want to change. Let me guess: you’re still using the same outdated phone you were last time we saw each other, you’re still drunk by noon every day, and your life hasn’t gone anywhere. Just like Dad always told you.”

Qrow suppressed a string of unsavoury curses and kicked at a chunk of loose asphalt at his feet. “I’m glad you couldn’t find Tai. You don’t deserve to. You don’t deserve to see him or Yang ever again, and I’m certainly never gonna be the one to help you do it.”

Raven sighed. “Well, I suppose that’s all I could have expected. It’s a shame. I thought we could be a family again. You know, blood is thicker than water, Qrow.”

“Blood doesn’t mean a damn thing unless there’s a bond to back it up. And you know that just as well as I do.” He kicked the asphalt harder, towards the building, where it bounced off the wall and rolled away. “Are you done? I’ve got things to do.” He lied.

“No.” Her voice was hard, and she seemed to hesitate before continuing in a rush. “Why did you stay? What did you see in him?”

“In Tai?” Qrow snorted, incredulous, and raised his free hand in frustration. “Everything, Raven. Everything you never had the fucking patience to see. You were so blinded looking for strength in people that you didn’t see his kindness, you didn’t feel his love, you didn’t even _notice_ all the things he did for you.” He thought of Tai asleep upstairs, and wondered if he would be mad to hear him saying that. The thought made his stomach turn.

Raven tutted; he could imagine her rolling her eyes. “I should have seen it. I guess I always did. You were just as weak as him.”

Qrow set his jaw, red mist descending over his eyes. He bit his tongue on it. “We’re done here.”

“They would have killed you if they could have gotten away with it.”

“What?” He was stunned by the non-sequitur. “What are you-”

“Our parents. You know they didn’t want you. They only wanted me.”

“Okay. Goodbye Raven.”

She started to say something else, but he pulled the phone away from his ear and hung up before he could hear it. He was used to that tactic; she brought out the abuse when she wasn’t getting her way the same as their mother always had. It was a trick she’d learned at a young age, and one that hadn’t worked on Qrow in twenty years. She really had to be desperate if she was pulling that one again.

He stayed in the parking lot for a moment, looking up at the sky and watching sheets of cloud the texture of chiffon flow over the stars. While he might not fall for her bait anymore, Raven still knew how to hurt him, the same way he still knew how to hurt her if it came down to it. The remark about Tai and his weakness had stung him deeply; he still had the same survival instinct as her, deep down, the same need to be strong. But Raven saw devotion as weakness, used people for her needs and never seemed to care much for any of them. And now where was she? Last time he’d checked, she’d been living in a tiny town on the Gulf Coast, friend only to the kind of person she had become.

Qrow labelled the number she’d called from as ‘DO NOT ANSWER’ in his phone, then let himself back into the apartment building. He had to work tomorrow, and he needed to get some sleep. The rum was catching up to him, and the idea of a snack and some late night comedy reruns to help him forget about Raven was appealing. But when he opened the door to his apartment, someone was waiting for him in the hall.

“What are you doing?” Yang asked quietly. Her arms were folded, her expression set in a stony glower.

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.” Qrow locked the door behind him, but when he turned back to her, she was staring at him with a fire in her eyes.

“Do you seriously think I’m stupid?” Her voice started to rise.

Qrow held out a hand, slightly panicked. “Shh, don’t wake your dad.” He frowned and inclined his head towards the living room. “In here.”

She followed him in and closed the door. “Qrow, what is going on?”

“It’s nothing important. It doesn’t affect you.” He lied, dropping his keys and phone on the coffee table.

“That’s bullshit.”

“Hey, language!” He sighed and slumped down on the couch.

“When are you gonna learn that Ruby and I aren’t blind?” She almost laughed, throwing her hands up in the air. “You’re keeping secrets, but you’re not even good at it! I know you’ve been lying to us.”

“Yang-”

“I know you get drunk at work. I know you’re friends with Professor Ozpin. And I know you and Dad are fighting!” She counted the secrets off on her fingers. “Why don’t you treat me like a person and talk about it?”

Qrow couldn’t look her in the eye as he replayed her words in his head. She had a knack for seeing not just the root of the problem, but also the jugular, and going right for it. He certainly felt like he was bleeding.

Finally, he sighed. “Yeah, I had a fight with your dad. I’m sure you heard. So you probably know why, too.”

“Because he thinks you don’t care.”

“Yeah.”

She shrugged. “But he’s wrong. Why didn’t you tell him that?”

He watched curiously as she sat down in the armchair. “He’s not wrong, not really. He’s worried, and he should be.”

“About you not caring?” Yang gave him a look of disgust. “You are joking, right?”

“No, Yang. You said it yourself.” He shook his head. “I’m not fit to take care of you two.”

She was quiet for a moment, not looking at him. “Okay, I get it. Yeah, I know you drink too much, and you’re never here, and it sucks. It does! But you’re not… an unfit parent. I like it here. And I know Ruby does too.” She finally met his eye. “We can tell you’re trying.”

The hopeful tone in her voice almost made him smile. “Well, I guess that’s something.”

“Dad’s right, though. You need to _keep_ trying.”

“I know.”

“You should talk to him again.”

“He won’t listen to me. He compared me to Raven; that’s pretty beyond the pale for him.”

“He was upset.”

“He was drunk.” Qrow corrected firmly. “Maybe he’d listen to you, but… I’m not sure.”

“Well… Maybe I’ll talk to him then.” She shrugged again. “But I don’t want him to go back to China without dealing with this.”

“Me neither. Thanks, Firecracker.” He smiled at her, but she didn’t return it.

“I need you to do something in return.” She said.

“Okay. What is it?”

“You made a big deal about me and Ruby coming to you when something happened, and communicating with you instead of bottling it up. But you won’t take your own advice!”

“Well-”

“No excuses. No more lies, no more half-truths, no more hiding. You have to treat us like adults. Like people. Talk to us.” The last part came out as a plea, and if Qrow hadn’t already decided, he did then.

“Alright.” He nodded. “Just… you might have to remind me every now and then. I’m a little out of practice, as it were.”

“Okay. Here’s a reminder: Where were you just now?”

Qrow sighed. “Your mom called me. Said she wanted to talk to you. She asked for your phone number so she could contact you.”

“Mom called you?” Yang’s eyes widened.

“Yeah. I went outside to answer it cause… Well, I knew I’d get mad.”

“Why you, why not Dad?”

“I’m easier for her to track down. She’s good at finding people when she wants them, but she doesn’t know your dad’s been overseas.”

Yang seemed to be stunned into silence, her fists clenching on her knees.

“If you do wanna talk to her, I’ve got her number. I can give it to you and you can call her when you’re ready.” He leaned forwards to grab his phone, but Yang spoke before he reached it.

“No.” She shook her head. “Not… Not now.”

He nodded and sat back. “Okay.”

“Just keep it for now. I’ll decide. If I wanna call her, I mean. I’ll decide.”

“Yeah. Remember what I said, though. She’s not worth getting worked up over.”

“Where is she?” She almost interrupted him. “Like, is she in Oregon? Where does she live?”

Qrow bit at the inside of his lip. “Last time she came here she’d driven from Texas. I don’t know if she still lives there. I’d guess not.”

Yang nodded, but didn’t speak.

“Come on, kid. Go back to bed. We can talk about this more some other time, but I’m tired, and I know you are too.”

She stood up, but paused, left hand on right elbow. “If Dad won’t make up with you… What do you think’s gonna happen?”

“I don’t know.” Qrow shook his head. “But I hope he at least lets you and Ruby stay here.”

“Yeah. I hope so too.” She walked out of the living room, and Qrow listened to the bedroom door open and close, then silence.

He sighed, eyebrows knitting in concern. For her, for Ruby, for Tai. For what it was worth, himself. His appetite was diminished, his desire to watch TV gone. All he really wanted was the blissful unawareness of sleep.

* * *

 

_They were shouting nonsense. It didn’t matter what the words were, but they were loud enough to make his ears hurt. He was small, his fourteen year old spindly-legged self, facing his sister. She still towered over him at this point; she’d grown faster than him. They were both dressed the same, shorts and tank tops and wrapped hands in the unofficial arena of the bare-dirt backyard. There was no one around to hear their parents’ drunken whooping, not this far out of Vale._

_She struck at him without warning, and it was only instinct that let him duck in time. He struck back, but his fist barely skimmed her shoulder as she dodged and swung back around with a hook that sent pain sparking through his cheekbone. He lost interest in fairness, kicked her feet out from under her, leapt on top of her and pounded at her until his father grabbed the back of his shirt and dragged him up, dumping him unceremoniously on his ass._

_‘Play by the rules.’_

_They started over, miss after miss after miss punctuated with heavy hits that sounded through his skull with a noise like tenderizing meat, his ears ringing in their wake. Finally, he got in a straight shot to her nose, and there was a thick, wet crunch. She screamed, bending over with her hands over her face and blood running rapidly down from between them. A wave of pain like electricity crackled through his right middle finger, shooting up to his arm, and he clutched at it as Raven tapped out, still crying._

* * *

 

Qrow woke up in the process of falling off the couch, catching himself heavily on his right arm. He sat up, shivering on the laminate with his heart beating loud and fast. When he checked the time, it was past ten, and he dragged himself up from the cold ground, to the protestation of his aching head and churning stomach. He didn’t want to sit and think about it; that nightmare was almost thirty years old and he’d seen it too many times to bother reflecting on it.

He went straight to the liquor cabinet, took a large swig of the first thing he grabbed and almost threw up upon finding it was a bottle of gin. He shoved it back into the cabinet and followed it up with a more tolerable sip of rum. This was overstepping the bounds of even his usual bad habits, but though he knew he was going to extremes, he couldn’t bring himself to care. He was in for a long, arduous day at work full of drunk assholes just like him, and when it ended, there would be no celebrations. Just another day of silence.

He filled his flask with vodka, wishing for whiskey that he didn’t have. The smell almost made him sick all over again, but he forced down some painkillers with a glass of water and managed to keep them down. He took a shower, head spinning in the hot steam, and dressed as smartly as he could manage. When it came time for him to leave for work, he put on the first sweater he found: a thin two-tone grey knit. For a moment, his mind was blank apart from images of Tai, memories of Christmas and thoughtful gifts. He shrugged and put it on; it was just clothing, in the end.

The bar was dead when he arrived and remained so for hours; he had chance to stave off the remnants of his hangover with frequent sips of vodka and little movement. By five, Qrow had taken to scrubbing tables that were already clean just for something to do. He was almost glad when he knocked over and shattered a salt shaker; cleaning up the mess and vacuuming under the table kept him occupied for fifteen minutes he’d have otherwise spent staring out the front window, trying not to think.

Service started to pick up at six, and by eight, the bar was busy with revellers, noise rising rapidly. Qrow kept his head down and didn’t talk much to anyone; none of his regulars were in anyway. He had a sudden, plaintive wish that Ozpin was here, to share a quiet word and grasp his hand and settle him, somehow. Oz had replied to his message late on Christmas Day, but Qrow had not been able to bring himself to continue the conversation. He thought about texting him again, but knew that in his vulnerable state, it would be unwise. Better to wait until he felt steadier in himself.

The night dragged on, and Qrow kept the music quiet even knowing not all his customers could hear it. Salem still wasn’t here to reprimand him; she hadn’t shown up. By nine thirty, he was the only one working in the bar, most of his vodka was gone, and he was periodically zoning out between customers. He watched the couples under the mistletoe of the still-adorned tables for two and felt a painful, desperate loneliness in the depths of his chest, something that clung to him. He had a vision of Tai finding somewhere else for Ruby and Yang to stay, leaving him alone in his apartment, alone in the world. What would he do? What would there be for him?

Yang was his only hope to change Tai’s mind.

He’d almost forgotten about her by midnight, though, in a haze of drunkenness and the rush of customers and the deafening cheer when the hour finally struck. The next two hours were a blur, there was too much noise, and he snapped in the faces of a few rude customers, fucked himself out of a few tips he didn’t really care about. He was glad when the place started emptying, even happier when he kicked out the few stragglers at 2 am and locked up to go home.

* * *

 

When Qrow arrived back at the apartment he barely felt drunk, though his body disagreed; he was clumsy and stumbling, but his thoughts were unfortunately clear. He staggered to the bathroom, splashing water down his sweater as he washed his hands, then headed to the living area to eat and hopefully fall back into the dark abyss of sleep. But as he entered, someone looked up at him from the couch.

Tai was wearing pyjamas, shivering in his t-shirt and shorts, Qrow’s blanket wrapped around his shoulders. His eyebrows knitted as Qrow walked in. They stared at one another for a moment, absent of ill-intent. Qrow tried to find his voice, but couldn’t speak.

Tai broke the silence. “Hey.” He said quietly, and looked guiltily down and away from meeting Qrow’s eye.

“That’s it? ‘Hey’?” Qrow slurred, swaying on the spot. There was another long pause, and he stepped forward to close the door behind him. “What are you doing still up?”

“I was waiting for you.” Tai ducked his head even further, shoulders rounded as he clutched the blanket closer. “I know you probably won’t remember this tomorrow, but… Can we talk?”

Qrow nodded, then picked his way over to sit on the couch at Tai’s left. “You go first.”

“I’m sorry.” He sighed. “I was too harsh to you the other day. I know I must have upset you.”

“Upset me?” Qrow snorted. “Tai, you verbally fucking eviscerated me.”

“I know, I know.” Tai buried his face in his hands and spoke through them. “I’ve been thinking about it for days. I was wrong. I was so wrong.”

Something snapped in Qrow, and he sighed, reaching out a shaky hand to rest on Tai’s shoulder. “You weren’t wrong. You didn’t say it in the nicest way, but… You’re right. Things need to change.”

Tai looked up, wariness in his gaze. “Okay. I thought you-”

“Not everything you said was true. And I can’t do everything you wanted me to. But yeah, I need to focus on Ruby and Yang more, and I need to slow down my drinking.”

“You need to stop altogether.”

“Yeah, well, that’s easier said than done.” The edge came out in his voice again, and he moved his hand to Tai’s knee. “I’m doing my goddamn best, Tai. Always. You’ve gotta give me time.”

“You’ve had four months.”

“And you’ve had seventeen years. Good parenting doesn’t exactly come naturally at a later age.”

Tai nodded, hesitated, and slowly leaned over to rest his head on Qrow’s shoulder. “Yeah. You’re right.”

“I’m not perfect. I’m never gonna be. But… Yang told me she likes it here. And Ruby does too. They wanna stay.”

“I know. Yang talked to me.” He took a deep breath, then snorted. “Actually, she kinda yelled at me. They’ve been worried I’d make them go somewhere else. I don’t know where. There isn’t anywhere else. There isn’t any _one_ else.”

“I know.”

They fell into silence again, both staring into space. Qrow didn’t know what Tai was thinking, but he wondered if they were feeling the same sense of deep, cool relief, like water on a burn. That even if nothing was fixed, at least they were speaking. At least it was something.

“You need to talk to them.” Tai said firmly, sitting up, then corrected himself. “ _We_ need to talk to them. They need to know what’s going on and what we’re gonna do about it, and what’s gonna happen next. We can’t keep them in the dark.”

“I know.” Qrow repeated. “Yang yelled at me last night, too. I’m gonna talk to them.” He paused, remembering the conversation in question. “They’re perceptive kids, you know. They know all kinds of shit I’d rather they didn’t.”

“Well, you’ve only gotta look at Yang wrong and she knows what’s up. And Ruby’s got that…” He trailed off.

“That same sharpness as Summer.” Qrow finished for him. “Yeah.”

“They heard the argument. Through the wall.” Tai shook his head. “Nothing can make you regret the things you say like your teenage daughters parroting them back at you.”

“You did say some pretty shitty things.”

“Yeah. You kept your cool a lot better than I did.”

“I’m used to being yelled at.”

“I know, and that’s terrible.”

Qrow shrugged, but didn’t reply.

Tai sighed. “I really let everything go to shit, didn’t I?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I mean… This was all my fault anyway, wasn’t it? Disappearing to China, worrying too much, getting drunk and yelling at you, giving you the cold shoulder… It was all… Immature.”

“Well… Yeah.” Qrow admitted, avoiding his eye. “But you just… you gotta focus on the good stuff.”

Tai almost smiled, tilting his head at his own favourite expression. “What do you mean?”

“The good stuff. Teaching a whole bunch of kids really important stuff, keeping your own kids safe, reminding your best friend that he’s a bit of an asshole sometimes. That’s all pretty good.”

“Yeah.” Tai chuckled, his eyes closing briefly. “Yeah, I guess it is.”

“I’m gonna get my shit together, Tai. And I forgive you for whatever wrong you did me. And… for what it’s worth, I’m sorry I ever went far enough you needed to do it.” Qrow smiled ruefully in Tai’s direction.

“Thanks.” He smiled back, and placed his hand over Qrow’s on his knee. “I appreciate that.”

“You should.” Qrow winked, then stood up. “You’ve still got three days here, and we got a lot of time to make up for, so maybe you should go to bed.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Tai got up too, and took off Qrow’s blanket. “Sorry, I… I didn’t wanna keep you up.”

“No, don’t worry. I’m glad we talked sooner rather than later.”

“Me too.” He stepped forward and they hugged, and Tai brushed his hand down Qrow’s back. “You’re wearing the sweater I got you.” He said, face pressed into the fabric.

“Yep. You’ve got good taste.” Qrow chuckled and stepped back from the embrace.

“Thanks. Oh, and happy New Year.”

“Yeah, happy New Year, Tai. And hey, if this one sucked, at least you get another one in February over in China.”

Tai laughed genuinely, wrapping his arms around himself. “Yeah, I guess that’s something.” He shook his head fondly. “Go to bed, birdbrain. Sleep it off and we’ll talk more tomorrow.”

“Okay. Tell Ruby and Yang what happened if they ask.”

“I will.” He headed for the door, not turning back as he continued. “Goodnight, Qrow.”

The door opened and closed behind him, and Qrow spoke into the silence. “Goodnight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a really interesting one to write just because of the range of interactions Qrow has in it. Going from Raven's patronising attitude to Yang's worried anger to Tai's regret was... an experience. And Qrow in the middle of it all just trying to pick up the pieces. Hopefully you enjoyed reading it!


	21. Amelioration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tai spends his last three days in Vale, and Qrow tries to fix the mess he's made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the first time since I started posting this fic, I've written NOTHING between posting the last chapter and posting this one. So forewarning: I might alter my posting schedule at the end of the month if I haven't caught up with myself again. Two uploads a week is great, but I want to focus on quality over quantity, because I've slowed down significantly. I can't say anything certain yet, but I'm going out of town in 2 weeks so there'll be an early chapter anyway, I'll make it clear when I know for sure. Anyway, thanks for reading, enjoy!

Qrow woke up to his first hangover of the year already pounding against the inside of his skull, a pain so monstrous it seemed it was trying to break out. He couldn’t suppress a groan as he rolled over and sat up and the ache increased. It took a moment for the light-headedness to ebb enough that he could stand up, and he squinted against the daylight streaming in. It was past eleven, and there were dirty pans and plates in the kitchenette; he’d somehow slept through Tai and the girls making and eating breakfast.

He went straight for the liquor cabinet, almost on instinct, but paused with the last dregs of the rum in his hand. Remembering his conversations with Yang and Tai, he sighed deeply and put the bottle back. Instead, he poured himself a glass of water and took a dose of painkillers, hoping his unsettled stomach wouldn’t immediately reject them. Then he huddled back on the couch, sitting upright but wrapping the blanket around himself and checking his phone.

Tai had texted a couple of hours before, three messages in a row like usual because he could never get all his thoughts into one.

‘ _I’m really glad we talked stuff out last night, but do you actually remember it all?_ ’

‘ _Also I talked to Ruby and Yang but only briefly, there’s still stuff they need to know._ ’

‘ _Oh and Ruby mentioned your friend James invited us over? Why didn’t you say so? Could you talk to him and see if we can visit before I leave? I haven’t seen the guy in years._ ’

Qrow managed a smirk down at his phone and replied simply:

‘ **I’m up, come talk.** ’

It was easier to talk to Tai face to face than to try to type out his disorganised reply on a screen that was making his eyes hurt to look at. He put his phone down, and it wasn’t long before Tai walked into the living room, peering around the door and breaking into a laugh when he saw Qrow.

“You look like a sick little kid.” He chuckled, and walked over to sit in the armchair. “You hungover?”

“What do you think?” Qrow grumbled, his voice hoarse.

“Well, if there’s one day of the year you should be hungover, I guess New Year’s Day is it.” Tai sighed, his smile fading. “How are you doing?”

“Doesn’t matter. I’m fine.”

He chewed his lip for a moment, but then nodded. “Yeah. Okay. You got my messages, though?”

“Yeah. To answer your questions: Yes, I remember what we talked about, I know we still need to speak to Ruby and Yang, and yeah, I’ll get onto James and see if we can go over there… Maybe tomorrow.” Qrow shrugged.

“You missed one. Why didn’t you tell me he invited us over?”

He sighed. “I didn’t think you’d wanna go. Didn’t wanna get Ruby and Yang’s hopes up talking about it if we weren’t going.”

“Qrow, you’re a real idiot sometimes, do you know that?” Tai shook his head, smiling. “You could have just asked. I’d love to go see James’ new place and see how he’s doing. Why don’t you message him?”

“Ugh, not now.” He grimaced at the thought of holding a conversation over text. “Let me sit here and suffer for a while.”

“Oh, you drama queen. There’s no wonder you’re suffering, you haven’t even got a glass of water over here.” Tai got up and filled a clean glass with water, then brought it back to the coffee table. “You should eat something, too, if you can. Did you take any painkillers?”

“Yeah. I don’t wanna eat, though, I’ll throw up.”

“Well, if you didn’t drink more to get rid of your hangovers maybe you’d feel a little better.”

“I didn’t drink anything this morning.” Qrow almost snapped, then continued more softly. “I have been listening to you, you know.”

Tai looked surprised, but smiled again. “Hey, that’s good. Well done.”

“Thanks. Now leave me to die, would you?”

He laughed. “Sure. I’m coming back to make lunch in an hour, though, and you’re gonna eat _something_.”

“Fine. Whatever you say.” Qrow slumped over onto his side, but he couldn’t help smiling when Tai patted his shoulder as he passed. He wouldn’t say so, but he was proud of himself too, even as his stomach churned.

There were worse prices to pay.

* * *

 

As promised, Tai came back and started making lunch after an hour, Ruby and Yang in tow. Yang sat down at the dining table and gave Qrow a wry smile from across the room while Ruby helped Tai make sandwiches. Eventually, Tai returned to the couch and made Qrow get up, put down the blanket, and sit at the dining table in his pyjamas. Qrow insisted he really didn’t want anything to eat, but Tai put down two slices of buttered toast in front of him with such a pleading expression that he decided to try. After the first few bites, it got easier, and suddenly the turkey sandwiches that the others were eating looked appetising.

He kept drinking water, and they stayed at the dining table after they’d finished eating. Tai and the girls caught him up with everything they’d discussed already, and Qrow explained the rest the best he could. That yes, he’d been hiding things, he had a problem, he was trying to solve it. It would take time, but he was trying to be better. They both looked at him seriously, and Ruby grabbed his arm and squeezed it reassuringly.

“Well, if there’s anything we can do to help, just ask.” She said.

They spent most of the day relaxing, especially Qrow, who spent the majority of the afternoon curled up on the couch in his pyjamas. He finally got up to shower and get dressed in the late afternoon, once his head had stopped pounding. His hands were still shaking, though, and he was craving a drink, so he gave in, finishing the rum and pulling a face at what few disappointing bottles were left in the cabinet. Tai gave him a disapproving look, but Qrow just reiterated that addictions didn’t magically go away overnight and closed the cabinet door.

He suggested ordering takeout for dinner, but every restaurant they checked was closed for New Year, even the Chinese place up the street. That got Tai on a tangent about how American Chinese food was different to actual Chinese food, and Qrow only half-listened as he started cooking. If they couldn’t have takeout he could at least make fried rice; just the thought made his stomach growl.

By the time they sat down to eat again, Qrow felt normal by his standards, with another drink nearby, this one vodka and coke. The atmosphere around the table was cheerful and light-hearted, now that the serious conversation was out of the way. Tai sat on Qrow’s right and they fired back and forth with jokes at one another’s expense, egged on by Ruby and Yang. It went on until Tai brought up one of Qrow’s more embarrassing college memories, reminding him just how long he’d been walking around campus with his shirt on inside out after a heavy night before. Qrow didn’t have an equivalent comeback; Tai had been a much better student than him. And Ruby and Yang had collapsed into fits of giggles, so he just shook his head and got up to load the dishwasher.

Tai reminded him about James’ invitation after dinner, and Qrow typed out a brief, polite text now that he could stand to look at his phone. James got back to him quickly with an emphatic agreement that they should come over tomorrow, stay for lunch, get their belated gifts. Qrow grabbed his own gift for James from on top of the bookshelf in his bedroom, where it had been sitting since he’d forgotten to take it to the house the last time. Ruby and Yang gathered their gifts and cards for Penny, too, and they piled it all into a grocery bag in the hallway so they wouldn’t forget again. He felt reassured; they were getting organised, one step at a time.

* * *

 

The drive up to James’ house seemed more difficult this time; the roads in the suburbs were icy, and Qrow’s truck seemed to be struggling. Still, they reached the long driveway on time, and Ruby and Yang reacted the same way Qrow had the first time he’d seen it: Open-mouthed and amazed. They piled out of the truck and Qrow leaned on the doorbell again to piss James off. Sure enough, when the door opened, it was with force, and James scowled at him.

“I’m going to strangle you one of these days, Qrow.” He intoned, then smirked. “It’s nice to see the rest of you, though.”

Qrow just grinned as he let them in, and looked around the bright hallway. The Christmas tree was still up, three gifts sitting lonely beneath it. His gaze traced up to the star at the top, and then to the stairs, where Penny was leaning over the banister and grinning. She ran down the rest of the way, and Ruby and Yang pushed past Qrow to greet her with a group hug. Qrow and Tai just watched for a moment until they broke off, and Penny waved to them over Yang’s shoulder.

“Penny, would you bring the gifts to the living room?” James asked, inclining his head and walking down the hall.

“Of course!” She grabbed the three boxes from under the tree and stood up. “This way.” She led them to the living room, and put everything down on the glass coffee table.

“Wow, this place is so pretty!” Ruby exclaimed, staring at the floor to ceiling windows in wonder. “I love that painting.” She pointed at an abstract canvas in a rainbow of acrylics that hadn’t been there when Qrow had last visited.

“That’s one of mine.” Penny smiled, a blush rising in her cheeks. “I painted it for Father’s birthday this year.”

“You made that?” Ruby’s voice pitched up an octave. “That’s so cool! You’re so talented!”

“Yeah, Penny, that’s awesome.” Yang agreed.

“Oh, it’s… I just practice a lot.” Penny waved them off. “Please, sit down. Father’s making lunch, I’m going to see if he needs help.” She gestured to the couch, then hurried out of the room.

Qrow sat down first, practically falling onto the pristine couch and spreading out. Ruby sat at his left, and Yang and Tai took the two armchairs on the right of the couch.

“So… James is really rich, then?” Yang asked quietly.

Qrow snorted. “Yeah, you could say that.”

“And he’s just as stilted as ever.” Tai smirked.

“Hey, he’s not so bad. Remember what he was like when we were in college?” He shook his head. “He could be way worse.”

“True.”

“I didn’t know Penny was an artist.” Ruby murmured, craning her neck to stare at the painting on the wall again.

“Me neither.” Qrow looked up at it too; it really was pretty, a rich warm spectrum of colours that looked to have been applied to the canvas with a sponge. The composition was naïve but the colours were pleasing to the eye, and in a room full of white and grey, they popped.

James and Penny returned to the living room and sat down, Penny on Ruby’s left and James in the last armchair. They exchanged their gifts, Qrow handing James a pair of fancy leather gloves and receiving a bottle of expensive Japanese whiskey in return. There was a collective quiet when he opened it and inspected the box it came in, and he felt Ruby and Yang watching his expression change from concern through apprehension to gratitude. He thanked James profusely and put the bottle down at his feet without saying much more about it.

Penny opened a set of fancy-scented organic soaps from Yang, blushing when Ruby cheerfully told her that she used the same rose one. From Ruby herself, she received a necklace, small green and black enamel pendants lined up on an imitation-gold chain. Ruby rambled about it for a moment, about how she hadn’t been able to decide what to buy and hoped she liked it, until Penny hugged her tightly enough to make her gasp for air.

Penny had made Yang and Ruby friendship bracelets, multi-coloured beads woven into braided cords. Ruby’s was white and red on black cord, Yang’s yellow and orange on purple. Penny helped them both tie them onto their wrists, fumbling slightly with Ruby’s and bending close to finish the knot. They all looked so joyful as they chattered and admired Penny’s handiwork that Qrow had almost forgotten about James and Tai, until James spoke.

“I’m sorry we don’t have anything to give you, Tai.”

Tai snorted and waved a hand. “Don’t worry about that. I haven’t seen you in five years, I didn’t expect anything. Anyway, you’re feeding me; that’s enough.”

James returned to the kitchen soon after, and before long they were crowding around the dining table as he served hearty chicken and vegetable soup, warm crusty bread, and a winter salad topped with sautéed squash. Tai and James spent most of the meal catching one another up on the last five years of their lives, while Qrow nudged Ruby under the table for picking the cucumber out of her salad. They were offered dessert, but after the heavy main course, not even Ruby accepted. Instead, James made everyone coffee, and Penny took Ruby and Yang upstairs to see her bedroom.

Qrow and Tai sat back on the couch, while James took his previous spot in the armchair.

“They seem to be getting on well.” Tai commented.

James smiled. “They are. To tell you the truth, I think Ruby and Yang have changed Penny’s life. It’s been a long time since she’s had friends like them.”

Fondness flooded Tai’s face. “Yeah. I’m glad to hear that.”

“She decide what she’s doing about high school yet?” Qrow asked.

“Yes. She wants to go to Beacon.” James shook his head a little. “I don’t know how it’s going to go or even if they’ll let her in, but I promised we would try. We’re going to arrange a meeting with the principal tomorrow.” He gave Qrow a knowing look.

“Why don’t you think they’ll let her in?” He pointedly ignored James’ gaze. “Thought this online thing was accredited.”

“It is, but that just means colleges will take her. I don’t know about transferring back into public school. The online school is usually the last or only option for the students that use it.”

“Huh. Well, from what I can tell, the principal’s a pretty reasonable guy. I’m sure he’ll do his best for you.”

“You’d know, of course.”

“Wait, what?” Tai frowned. “You know the principal of Beacon?”

“Yeah, he’s a regular at the bar.” Qrow deflected, then remembered his promise about not lying and sighed. “Well, we’re friends. He’s… you know the bird figurine?”

“That was him?”

“Yeah.” Qrow could feel his face reddening, and James smirking at him wasn’t helping. “Anyway, he’s a nice guy. He’ll help you and Penny out.”

“Glad to hear it.” James sipped his coffee.

“Okay, hang on.” Tai wasn’t finished. “So… am I putting this together right? Are you seriously thinking about dating the principal of Beacon High School?” His expression was incredulous.

Qrow floundered. “Well, I mean… Not necessarily, as such, but-”

Tai interrupted him with a loud laugh. “Talk about punching up.”

“Oh, come on, that’s uncalled for.” He couldn’t suppress a smile, though, and now James was laughing too. He shook his head. “Fuck you guys.”

Ruby and Yang were quiet but still excitable on the drive back to Bayside Apartments, Ruby constantly fidgeting with her new bracelet as they talked in the backseat. Penny had surreptitiously handed her something as they’d left, and now between playing with the bracelet her hand kept going to her pocket where she’d put it. Qrow was pretty sure he’d been the only one who’d seen the exchange, and he wasn’t about to enlighten Tai. She had a right to her secrets.

They went out to dinner that night, to the fancy steak house on Main Street, and Qrow paid for them all. Tomorrow was Tai’s last day in the USA; he would fly back to China in the late afternoon. Qrow couldn’t really describe the feeling. He would be sad to see him go, of course, perhaps even more so because he knew Ruby and Yang would mope for a few days afterwards. On the other hand, while he had no intention of breaking his promises, it would be nice to take them at his own pace. He thought guiltily of the bottle of expensive whiskey in the liquor cabinet as they walked home again. It wasn’t going to go to waste.

* * *

 

The girls started back at school the next morning, and Qrow woke up to them making lunches in the kitchen with Tai’s input. He stayed where he was on the couch and listened for a bit as Tai told them about school lunches in China, then left to get ready for the day while they said their goodbyes. They wouldn’t need him present, and he was already feeling the sad twisting in his gut that signalled a coming loss, however temporary it might be. He’d have time to say his own words later. By the time he was dressed, Ruby and Yang were gone, and Tai was staring glassily into a mug of coffee with reddened eyes.

Qrow helped him pack his last few possessions into his suitcase, his empty holdall folded up and crammed in on top so he didn’t have to pay the extra bag charge again. Then he watched as Tai put on his St Christopher and his new watch, almost reverentially. He tucked the pendant under his shirt and nodded to Qrow, and they left his luggage by the door until it was time to go.

They ate an early lunch together and sat on the couch watching inane TV, and Tai leaned on Qrow’s shoulder again. Qrow wanted to say something, speak over the talk show host with something meaningful, but he couldn’t find anything. He settled for resting his hand on Tai’s knee and hoping he understood. He had always seemed to in the past, when Qrow hadn’t been able to find the right words and had kissed him instead, or held onto him like Tai was a life raft and Qrow was drowning. They were similar, in that way: Never quite verbose enough to express their love.

They set off at one; Tai’s flight was at six, and he wanted plenty of time to get through security after he arrived at the airport. The drive was mostly quiet, both of them absorbed in thought and Qrow focusing on the road too hard like he always did on I-5, knuckles white on the steering wheel. There was no animosity in the truck but he couldn’t help thinking about the week of silence between Christmas and New Year. So much wasted time, something he couldn’t allow to happen again. But it had been his fault, and it was his flaws that needed fixing so he never had to feel that shame again.

_The first time Tai had approached Qrow about his drinking was after Summer’s death, nearly eight months later when his knee was as healed as it was going to get and Tai had been convinced the accident hadn’t been either of their faults. They had been on the couch together long after both Ruby and Yang were asleep, Qrow lying almost on top of Tai with his head on his chest, their legs entangled. They hadn’t started seeing each other romantically yet, but it was close, ever-burgeoning. Qrow hadn’t been able to stop getting up to take a sip of his drink, or disappearing to the kitchen to get another. Tai had asked him to sit still and Qrow had realised he couldn’t, that the whiskey was all that was on his mind if he tried._

_So Tai had talked to him, carefully and gently about whether he thought he could go the rest of his life without a drink. And Qrow had said no, because he couldn’t and he wouldn’t. They had gone back and forth for a while and Qrow had gotten so sick of the conversation that he’d drunkenly started flirting with him, and in the end they’d gotten distracted and Qrow had fallen asleep on Tai’s chest. It had continued to bother Tai, he knew, he’d caught him frowning at him, paying attention to habits he hadn’t noticed before. But they had talked again and Qrow had promised to be careful and not to drink around Ruby and Yang. And so Tai had accepted him, taken him with all his flaws included and loved him despite them and maybe even for them._

_He had never loved the drinking, but he had loved who Qrow was underneath it._

Now that their relationship was back in platonic territory, Qrow was at least thankful for that. It wasn’t until Tai that he’d really understood what a healthy romantic relationship was, or at least could be. And as his friend, Qrow felt secure in knowing there was at least one person in the world who had his back. His faith had been rocked by their fight, but with their relationship repaired, he almost felt it was stronger than ever. They’d gotten past their communication errors, their confused expectations of one another. They just had to keep that up, and the next time Tai returned, Qrow was sure there would only be joy.

They arrived at the airport drop-off at nearly four thirty, and Qrow got out of the truck with Tai to help him with his luggage. There was a short pause, another moment where there were no adequate words, and instead Tai grabbed him and hugged him tightly. Qrow held onto him for a moment, and spoke into his shoulder.

“Have a good flight. Hope it’s not too rough.” He murmured.

“Me too.” Tai pulled back and looked him in the eye. “Take care of yourself. And of Ruby and Yang.”

“I will. If there’s one thing I’ll do, it’s that.”

He nodded. “You know when I’m coming back again, right?”

“March thirty-first, yeah, I’ve had it written down since August.”

“Yeah, okay. Sorry. You know what I’m like.”

“Yeah, I know.” Qrow cracked a smile. “You’re doing great, Tai, you know that, don’t you?”

Tai nodded, his eyes welling with tears. “Yeah. And… I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Yeah, but… I mean, you know, you _know_ I love you, right? And that’s why I said all that stupid shit to you when I was drunk, because I don’t want you or my girls to get hurt by something that… that isn’t you.” His tone was frantic, and Qrow’s eyes widened.

“I know, I know. Tai, don’t-”

“I should have just talked to you sooner, I was just… proud and dumb. We could have had so much more time.”

“You got to spend that week with Ruby and Yang, and that was the most important thing.” Qrow put a steadying hand on Tai’s shoulder. “I hated every goddamn second you weren’t talking to me, but I needed that wake up call.”

Tai nodded slowly and sniffled, blinking heavily. “Yeah. But I’m… I’m still sorry.”

“And I forgive you.” Qrow hugged him again, stroked his hair one last time. “Go on, you’ve got a flight to catch. We’re gonna be just fine, and so are you.”

“Right.” Tai let go of him and grabbed his suitcase from the ground. “Uh… good luck with this… friend of yours, by the way.”

Qrow chuckled. “Yeah, thanks. I’ll let you know how it goes. Hey, text me when you land, okay?”

“I will. Bye, Qrow.”

“See you again, Tai.”

Tai turned and walked into the terminal, and Qrow got back into his truck before someone told him to move along. Driving away felt just as surreal as it had the first time, back in August. It seemed like a lifetime ago. As he circled back around the airport campus he felt strange, an emptiness and a sense of completeness both settling in him. There was the sense that without Tai he was nothing, but while he may have believed that back when they were kids, he didn’t anymore. He didn’t need another person to make him whole. Not even Tai.

It was knowing that, and remembering the luck Tai had wished him, that made him think of Ozpin again. He wanted to tell him the whole story of his holidays, explain his plans and ask if they could see each other more often. He wanted to hear about Ozpin’s time in Seattle, to see him smile again, to ask how Oscar was doing. And tomorrow, he could. He would. He smiled to himself as he got back onto the highway, looking forward, homeward, seeing bright gold in his mind’s eye.


	22. Action and Reaction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are changing both at home and at the bar. Qrow gets caught in the middle of it.

It was strange for Qrow to wake up in his own bed on Thursday, stranger still for it to be before seven thirty. But he’d gone to bed early the night before, tired from the long drive to Portland and back, and he felt well-rested. He got up and showered, and carefully selected a neat black shirt to wear under a sweater to work. He felt a little silly, caring so much about his appearance when he usually didn’t give it a second thought, but he knew he would see Ozpin today. And for once, he wanted to be the one to arrange a meeting between them. It was always Oz who made the first suggestion, and Qrow would just agree. But Tai’s good luck and their recent exchanges had bolstered his courage.

He couldn’t wait forever; he had to act.

When he entered the kitchen to make coffee, it was empty, but before the machine had finished, Yang walked in. She looked tired, and he wondered if she’d been awake messaging Tai; he’d still be on his flight for another couple of hours. His assumption that she hadn’t gotten much sleep was all but confirmed when she dumped her backpack heavily on the floor, and caught him watching her.

“What?” She snapped.

“Hey, less of the attitude.” He admonished. “You been up all night?”

She sighed. “No, but Ruby woke me up at 1 am laughing on the phone. I couldn’t get back to sleep.”

“Oh. Well, I’ll talk to her about that. I just didn’t know if you’d been talking to your dad.”

“I was before I went to bed.” Pressing the heel of her hand to her eye, she grimaced. “Ugh, how do you get through work on three hours sleep? I feel terrible already.”

“I don’t know.” Qrow shrugged. “Spite?”

She chuckled. “Well, if you’re making coffee, would you make me one?”

“Sure.”

They set about their separate tasks, Qrow adding sugar and a little milk to one of the coffees he had brewed and setting the mug on the dining table. Yang made herself breakfast, the last bowl of cereal out of the box and a handful of grapes from the fruit bowl. She sat down to eat as Qrow scoured the cabinets for his own food, frowning at the meagre choices. They’d run low on almost everything over the holidays.

“Hey, Qrow?” Yang said.

“Mm-hm?” He paid more attention to the interior of the fridge than to her.

“Could I have Mom’s number?”

He turned to see her sitting with her phone out on the table. For a moment, he hesitated, sure that no good could possibly come from Raven and Yang being able to communicate. But eventually, he closed the fridge door and took out his phone. “Here. The contact’s under D.”

Yang took the phone and unlocked it, then frowned. “Why’s it under D?” She scrolled through the contacts and her expression changed. “Oh. ‘Do not answer’.”

“Yeah.” Qrow sighed.

“Is she really that bad to you?” She typed the number into her own phone, and he noticed she labelled it as ‘Raven’.

“She’s… she’s not great. When she called the other day she went on a tirade about how your dad’s weak, and I’m weak, and our parents… never wanted me.”

Yang’s shoulders slumped, and she handed his phone back. She didn’t speak for a while.

Qrow gave up searching the cabinets, and just ate a banana  and sipped his coffee whilst leaning on the counter. A sliver of guilt was gnawing at him: Maybe he shouldn’t have told Yang what he really thought of her mom. But it would have been worse to deny her the truth; she already knew Raven was a bad mother. She might as well learn she was a bad person while she was too far away to really affect her.

Finally, Yang stood up with her empty bowl and dropped her grape stems into the trash. “I’m not gonna call her yet. I just wanna think about it.”

“Yang, you can take all the time you need. The only person who’ll be bothered by you waiting is Raven. And you don’t need to worry about her opinion.”

“Don’t I?” She shrugged, and her voice went flat. “Well, I guess she’s not really my family.”

Qrow didn’t know how to reply, so just finished his coffee in silence.

Ruby walked in as Yang was making their lunches and dropped her backpack nearby, her eyes just as tired as Yang’s. Qrow didn’t ask before turning back to the coffee machine and making her one, adding obnoxious amounts of sugar and creamer. She barely seemed to notice him as she went to help Yang, filling their water bottles and adding snacks to their backpacks. Once they were finished, he handed her the coffee, and she looked at him suspiciously.

“Yeah, I put five sugars in.” He answered the unasked question, and she nodded.

Yang zipped up her backpack and grabbed it. “I’ve gotta go get my school stuff. By the way, Ruby, I ate the last bowl of cereal.”

“What?” Ruby squeaked. “You promised I could have it!”

“Shouldn’t have kept me up all night, sis.” Yang grinned sarcastically and left the living area, leaving Ruby to look up at Qrow.

“She told you, didn’t she?” She asked.

“Yep.” He folded his arms and leaned on the counter again. “Who were you on the phone to?”

She tucked her free hand into the pocket of her shorts and ducked her head. “Penny.”

“James told me about this. You two can’t talk during the day?”

“We do! But there’s a lot to say!”

“Oh, so it takes all day _and_ all night.”

“Yeah! Especially when I’m at school, I can’t even text her until lunch most days.”

“Well, it’ll be a good thing when she gets to Beacon with you, then, won’t it?”

Ruby smiled. “Yeah, I can’t wait! I hope Professor Ozpin lets her in.” She eyed Qrow again, clutching her warm coffee close. “You know him, maybe you should ask him if he will.”

“Listen, kid, I can’t do anything about how he runs the school. That probably isn’t even his decision to make; it’s all the administrators.” Qrow shrugged. “I think she’ll get in. James is just paranoid.”

“I hope so.”

“Anyway, we’re getting off subject. If you’ve gotta talk to Penny in the middle of the night for some reason, you’ve got your own keys. Go outside and you can talk as loud as you want. Or at least sit in the living room.”

“Usually I do, but it was cold last night, I didn’t wanna get out of bed!”

Qrow sighed and rolled his eyes. “Right. Just don’t do it again.” He paused. “And honestly, I’d rather you got some sleep than stayed up all night in the first place. You look like hell.”

“I know.” She rubbed at her eye. “I’ll have to try really hard not to fall asleep in math.”

“Yeah. Why don’t you have something to eat? It might help.”

Ruby went through the same ritual he had, checking all the cabinets and then the fridge for food. Unlike Qrow, however, she settled for toast, her left hand still glued to her pocket as she waited for it to brown. She added peanut butter and sat down to eat and drink her coffee as Qrow casually filled his flask with vodka. He tried not to notice the way she politely averted her gaze.

“So, are you gonna tell me what Penny gave you?” He asked.

Ruby almost spat coffee, then turned to look at him with wide eyes. “How do you know about that?” She demanded.

“I pay attention.” He smirked at her reaction. “You don’t _have_ to tell me, I’m just curious.”

She sighed, and put her hand into her pocket again. This time she brought something out, and placed it on the table. It was a stone, barely half the size of Ruby’s thumb. The rough crystals were bright pinkish-red, uncut and unpolished, streaked with veins of white.

“Oh. Is that from Penny’s collection?”

“Yeah.” She smiled. “It’s a… spinel, I think she said? She wanted me to have it. It’s meant to make you stronger.”

“Oh, right, hippy crap.” Qrow said before he could stop himself.

“It’s not… garbage. It was thoughtful of her!”

“Yeah, you’re right, sorry. It’s not for me to judge.” He raised his hands. “So… Why was this a big secret?”

Ruby chewed on a bite of toast and shrugged. “Well, her dad gave her it as part of a set for Christmas.” She said with her mouth full. “So I think she’s worried he’d be mad. Plus she only gave something to me, not Yang. Maybe she didn’t wanna make Yang jealous.”

Qrow’s eyes narrowed, but he nodded. “Okay. I think I get it.”

“Hey… Don’t tell Yang, will you?” Her expression became desperate. “Or James.”

“Secret’s safe with me, kid.” He crossed his heart and smiled. “Trust me.”

* * *

 

Qrow went grocery shopping after Yang and Ruby had gone to school, then tidied the apartment a little, careful not to dishevel his shirt too much. He was somewhat preoccupied with them, both living in their problems the same way he had a tendency to. Still, there had been something going on all the time since they’d moved in, what with Weiss and Blake arguing back in fall, and most of November spent dwelling on their friend Jaune being bullied. They were kids; it was normal for them to get bogged down in their dilemmas. All he could do was be there when they needed him.

He checked his appearance for the twentieth time before leaving the apartment, flattening his sweater and smoothing down his hair in the mirror. Once he’d managed to convince himself he looked good, he left the apartment, a strange kind of bubbling in his stomach that made him feel a little sick. It had been a whole two weeks since he’d seen Ozpin and he was surprisingly anxious; a lot could change in that time. But if it hadn’t changed in four months, he supposed two weeks was nothing.

When he walked into The Gold Bar, the first thing that struck him was how loud the music was playing. All the Christmas decorations were gone, the menu boards were different, and there was no one behind the bar. He frowned, looking around as he stepped forwards. There was only one customer in the main room, and they were already drinking tea, so he paused to read the new menus. The cocktail menu had changed the most dramatically; it now simply listed spirits and their prices per measure, with the insistent announcement that:

‘ **We can make ANYTHING you ask for!** ’

The only new spirit on the list was pisco.

Qrow narrowed his eyes and scowled, looking around for Salem, because she had to be here somewhere. The door to the kitchen swung open, but the dark, pointed fingernails that gripped its edge were not hers.

Cinder stepped into the main room, paused to look impassively at Qrow, and made her way behind the bar.

“What are you doing here?” Qrow snarled, hands unconsciously clenching into fists.

She smirked at him over the counter. “Didn’t you hear? I work here.”

Qrow’s mind went blank and cold seemed to drain through his whole body, until he was quietly shaking with rage. “Where’s An?” He asked.

“She works in the kitchen now. You _did_ tell Salem we needed someone else back there.”

“I didn’t mean An!” He snapped, and shook his head. They had attracted the attention of the customer with the cup of tea. “Why you?”

Cinder frowned. “Because I was the best person for the job.”

“You mean because you’re Salem’s vile little protégé?” He stepped closer, until he was directly across the bar from her. “Because you’ll do whatever she asks you to?”

Cinder’s expression grew panicked and angry, but before she could speak, a door opened and closed in the side room. They both turned to look as Salem walked slowly into the room, wearing a dress that could have passed for funereal. She was glaring, and she came close to the bar to speak to them, standing right next to Qrow.

“What are you two doing?” She asked sharply.

“What do you think I’m doing?” Qrow spat, taking a step back to get her out of his space. “I’m wondering what the fuck’s going on here.”

“If you had come to work yesterday, you would know.” She advanced on him again. “Things are changing here, and if you aren’t careful, you’re going to be going out with the old.”

He took a deep breath and stopped himself saying something regretful. “Why did you put An in the kitchen? You know she can’t keep up with those twelve hour shifts!”

“What was the alternative? Cinder as a dishwasher?” She gestured at the other woman, who was now smirking again, arms folded. “Cinder will attract people to the bar. An doesn’t serve that purpose.”

“Don’t talk about her like she’s a thing! She’s a person, she’s got kids to take care of! What does _she_ have?” Qrow pointed violently at Cinder. “Nothing, except that you know her.”

Salem folded her hands in front of her and gazed levelly at him. “Come to my office, Qrow.”

A jolt went through his body, and he lowered his hand, shoulders slumping. He followed as Salem turned away, hearing Cinder mockingly giggle at him as he passed her.

Salem led him through the side room and around into the office, closing the door behind him with a snap. The room was small; it contained only a desk, a chair, and a shelf of records and employee files. She took down a binder from the shelf and removed a form, then sat down.

“I’m writing you up.” She said simply.

Qrow didn’t reply; he’d almost been expecting to be fired on the spot. Being written up was nothing in comparison. He watched as she wrote down his name, then signed her own as simply ‘S’. She ticked a box marked ‘ _Rudeness to customers/other employees_ ’ and wrote a brief note of exactly what he’d done that he couldn’t read from his angle in her cramped script. Then she ticked another box, marked ‘second warning’.

“Hey, wait.” He protested. “I’ve never been written up before.”

She glanced up at him, but continued writing as she spoke. “Yes, you have.”

“I’m pretty sure I’d remember if I had.”

“It’s right there in your employee file.” She gestured at the shelf like she was inviting him to look, and he apprehensively took down the thin manila folder with his name on it.

The write up form was at the top of the file, and he pulled it out to look at it. Sure enough, there it was, dated September thirteenth. He frowned. “I wasn’t here that day. I was out that whole week.”

“You were, but your hip flask was still here.”

He took a sharp breath and kept reading. Sure enough, she had ticked the box marked ‘Other’ and written:

‘ _Intoxicated at work._ ’

“You can’t write me up without me knowing.” He growled, looking at the paper instead of her. At the bottom of the page, the verifying signature was in the witness box. It was An’s.

“Apparently I can.” She signed her name at the bottom of the page and spun the paper around for him.

“I’m not signing this.” He tucked the other form back into the folder. “Unless you change it to first warning.”

Salem sighed. “Qrow, either you sign it, or I will have Cinder sign as a witness. Either way, it will be signed.”

He gritted his teeth and snatched the pen from her hand, scrawled his name as illegibly as possible, and shoved the form back at her.

“Good. Now get back to work.”

Qrow turned away, but she spoke again before he reached the door.

“I’ve been more generous than many would have been. You’re lucky.”

He didn’t reply, just walked out of the office and back towards the bar. “Yeah. Lucky me.” He muttered.

* * *

 

Qrow kept his head down and didn’t speak to Cinder as they worked, serving what few customers came in. She kept strong-arming her way in front of him when someone entered in order to serve them first, whether trying to out-perform him or just to be vindictive, he didn’t know. He was kept mostly cleaning the watermarks off glasses and mugs and stacking them on the shelves, ignoring her patronising compliments about how well he was doing.

As 4 pm drew closer, Qrow’s stomach started to lurch again as he thought about Ozpin, though this time it was mostly thanks to Cinder. He’d never realised how small the area behind the bar was until she was in it with him, constantly in his space. There was no way he’d be able to speak to Ozpin without her hearing, and almost certainly listening; he doubted she cared much for his privacy. He might be able to exchange pleasantries with him, but there would be no arranging a meeting today.

Ozpin entered on time, faltering in the doorway as he caught sight of Cinder behind the bar. He locked eyes with Qrow and walked over, though the suspicion never left his gaze.

“Hey.” Qrow tried to put his mind at ease by greeting him normally as he made his hot cocoa.

“Afternoon.” Oz replied quietly, resting his cane against the bar.

Qrow handed over the mug and took the five dollar bill he was offered, taking out two dollars to put into the tip jar.

Cinder interrupted him. “That isn’t right.”

“What? He’s a regular, mind your own business.”

“No, idiot, the change. The hot cocoa is three thirty now.”

Qrow paused and looked at the new menu guide beside the register. It was true; all of the hot drinks prices had risen by twenty or thirty cents. “Oh. Sorry, Oz.”

Ozpin just shook his head as Qrow reopened the register and got out the right change, then dropped it in the jar. It was noticeably emptier than usual.

“So, how have you been?” Qrow asked.

“I’ve been well, thank you. And you?” Ozpin replied.

“Well, you know. Up and down.” He shrugged. “I meant to ask, how was-”

Cinder kicked the back of his ankle as she passed to pick up a glass. “Less talking, more working.”

He rounded on her. “I’m still your goddamn manager, Cinder! I could write you up for that.”

“You could try.” She said smugly. “But you’d have to ask Salem for a form. And something tells me she wouldn’t let that happen. Not after you just got written up yourself.”

Qrow set his jaw and turned away from her, glancing at Oz. They were both wearing similar wary expressions. He kept his head down and cleaned a few more glasses as Cinder served the few customers who arrived while Ozpin was still sitting there. It wasn’t long before he put down his mug and stood up. Qrow pulled his phone out of his pocket quickly and waved it at waist level.

Ozpin saw what he was doing and nodded, then picked up his cane and left without another word.

It was barely a minute later when Qrow received a text from him, which he looked at while crouched at the shelves, pretending to look for something.

‘ _If you can call me during your break, please do._ ’

‘ **I will** ’, Qrow typed in return.

* * *

 

He had never known four hours to pass so slowly, but then he’d never had to spend four hours in quite such close proximity to Cinder. She kept quietly insulting him, muscling him out of the way to get to customers and then getting _in_ his way when he tried to do something. He hadn’t had a drink since the night before, and with that in combination with her annoyingly saccharine voice, he was getting jittery, uncomfortable, and ready to snap at any minute. When she finally left at six, he slumped like someone had let the air out of him. Salem followed at half-past, and he felt like he could breathe for the first time all day.

He overcompensated for his dry morning once they were gone, and by his break at eight he was already slightly tipsy. He had taken some cold leftover fries from the kitchen without speaking to anyone, and ate them quickly on the back step, shivering in the wind-chill. Then, a little hesitant, he got out his phone and called Ozpin, waiting as it rang.

Finally, he picked up. “Hello?”

“Hey, Oz, it’s me.” Qrow picked up on the defeat in his own voice. “You wanted me to call?”

“I did. Are you alright?” His tone was sincerely concerned.

“I’m… Well, no. I’m not, it’s a long story.”

“Maybe you should start with why Cinder is working at the bar.”

Qrow sighed and quickly told the story of how he’d walked in to see her, their argument, and Salem writing him up, including his unknown previous infraction.

Oz was quiet for a long time on the other end of the line. “This isn’t going to go well.” He said.

“It’s already not going well. If I can’t even stop and talk to regulars anymore, most of them will go somewhere else. Believe me, people don’t come here for the food or drinks, they come for the atmosphere.”

“And clearly that’s what Salem wants. What is she doing?” He mused.

“I don’t know.” Qrow shrugged to no one and hesitated. “Are you gonna keep coming in?”

“I was thinking about that. I may start coming when Cinder’s shifts are over.”

“Well, she finishes at six when she’s on the day shift. She’ll be in from five ‘til two if she’s on at night, but I doubt Salem will ever put her on that.”

“You’re probably right.” Ozpin sighed. “I could arrive at seven like I do on Saturdays, but I won’t be able to make it every night. Perhaps only two or three days a week.”

“Oz, you don’t have to go out of your way like that to support Salem’s bar.”

“I don’t, but I will.” He hesitated again. “I came to the bar for the first time out of morbid curiosity, to see how she was doing. I came back because I enjoyed the hot cocoa, intending for it to be a rare thing. And I _kept_ coming back because of you. If you and I can’t talk, what’s the point?”

Qrow floundered for a moment, deeply touched by Ozpin’s words. He stuttered for a moment before finding his voice. “We could always just meet up more elsewhere.”

“You and I both know there isn’t time.”

He took a deep breath and nodded, then remembered Ozpin couldn’t see. “Yeah. You’re right.” He bit his lip and continued. “So, will you come in any more this week?”

“Just Saturday, I think.”

“Alright. Well, I guess I’ll see you then.”

“You will. Take care of yourself, Qrow. Be as patient as you can.”

Qrow remembered his outburst at Cinder earlier and grimaced. “I’ll do my best. See you, Oz.”

“Goodbye.”

He hung up and ducked his head, elbows on his knees and arms limp. He felt sapped of energy, all the hope that had filled him this morning gone. Their conversation had been too brief, and now their talks over the bar would be less frequent. And Ozpin was right; there wasn’t time to meet elsewhere any more than they already did, not with Qrow’s long shifts and Ozpin’s responsibilities and both of their kids to care for. The clock was ticking. It had been for a while. Qrow had only just gotten close enough to hear it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I could have called this fic 'throwing bad shit at Qrow and seeing how he deals with it' and it would still have been accurate. Also, background-level Ruby/Penny because I love them and I'm self-indulgent. Thanks for reading!


	23. Coda

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow finally gets to speak to Ozpin face-to-face again, but his work relationships are crumbling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure this is the longest chapter so far in SDW! I'm at least 80% sure there's some incorrect factual details, but it happens, I don't think it impacts things much. And I'm excited to see how you all feel about this one! Enjoy!

Over the next two days, Qrow started getting used to habitual tightness in his chest, anxious heartbeats seeming to echo too deeply through his body. He was trying to honour his promise to Tai and the girls, but he found that alcohol was all that stopped his hands shaking, all that could placate his constant background-level rage. It was still difficult; if he wanted to drink before Salem left he had to sneak into the bathroom, and he knew that wasn’t a fool proof measure. She would learn eventually. He’d never been happy to be left working alone before, but now it was a relief when everyone went home before him.

This Saturday, Salem was late leaving; it was almost seven before Qrow got to have his first drink of the day, gulping down vodka and shuddering in its wake. It wasn’t long after that Ozpin walked in, wrapped up against the cold rain that was pouring outside. His hair was wet, flattened to his head, and when he raised his hands to the bar they were shaking violently.

“Good evening.” There was a cold quaver in his voice as he sat down and clenched his fingers together on the counter top.

Qrow didn’t reply before quickly making up his drink, handing over the hot mug with a concerned expression.

“Thank you.” Ozpin took it gratefully and wrapped his hands around it with a wince. “I’ll pay you when I can feel my fingers again.”

“Yeah, sure. Did you walk down here?”

He nodded. “I wanted some fresh air; I’ve been cooped up inside all day. In hindsight, that may have been a mistake.”

“May have been? Look at you.” He gestured to his hands.

Ozpin just sighed. “Bad circulation, that’s all. I’ll be fine.”

Qrow frowned. “If you’re sure.”

After a few moments hugging the mug, Ozpin handed over five dollars, and Qrow put the dollar seventy change into the tip jar, only to look up and find him holding out another thirty cents.

“What’s that for?” Qrow asked.

“For your tips.” Ozpin shrugged. “It wouldn’t be fair for you to lose out because Salem decided to charge more for drinks.”

“Oz, you don’t-”

“I don’t _have_ to do anything, no. But I want to.”

Qrow smiled and took the coins. “Thanks. We all really appreciate it.”

They slipped back into silence, and Qrow took another drink, watching Ozpin out of the corner of his eye. There was something missing from him, some light that usually shone in his eyes absent. It was the same kind of look that Qrow saw in the mirror every morning. He wondered if Oz felt the same as he did, in some way. Some internal strife that was keeping him dull. But he shook his head to himself; what kind of person thought like that? Trying to find himself in other people, it was barely above narcissism.

Ozpin put down his mug with a quiet clack that made Qrow turn to face him again. “How has it been? Working with Cinder?”

Qrow shrugged and then let his shoulders slump. “Rough.” He replied quietly. “Really rough.”

Oz nodded. “I’m sorry to hear that. Do you know what you’re going to do?”

“Look for another job. I’m starting tomorrow, haven’t had time yet. But I doubt there’s many places around here that’ll have me, not for the money I need.”

“Not many bars are looking for new managers, I assume.”

“No. Definitely not.” He leaned on the counter and sighed. “Probably I’m just gonna be stuck here for the foreseeable future.”

“I hope not.” Ozpin reached across and placed his hand on Qrow’s arm, sending a residual chill through him. “You deserve better than this.”

Qrow tried to look him in the eye, but felt he couldn’t. Instead, he shook his head. “Maybe.”

“You do.” He took his hand away. “But I have missed you while we’ve both been away.”

Surprised, Qrow looked up, unable to restrain a smile. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ve missed you too, Oz. How was Seattle, by the way? I never got chance to ask.”

Ozpin tilted his head and answered the unspoken question underneath. “It went as well as I could have imagined. Oscar’s grandmother was kind enough to us; unfortunately she was not so kind about Oscar’s biological parents. We’ve decided not to see her again.”

“Oh. I’m real sorry to hear that.”

“I appreciate it. But neither of us minded too much; Oscar feels he did the right thing giving her a chance, and that giving her a second would be foolish. He wasn’t as upset as I expected he would be.”

“I guess he never knew his parents that well.”

“No, he didn’t. If she had said anything against his aunt, he may have felt differently, but she was never brought up.” He gave a small smile. “We cut our trip a little short and spent the rest of the holidays at home, and we were much happier for it. What about you? How were your holidays? How is Taiyang?”

Qrow grimaced slightly. “It was kinda complicated, to be honest with you. Tai’s fine now, but… he wasn’t for a while. Neither was I.”

Ozpin’s eyebrows knitted. “Would you mind elaborating?”

He told as much of the story as he could stand to, from picking Tai up at the airport through their fight on Christmas day to their reconciliation. He skirted around what exactly had caused the fight and his difficulty in drinking less, unwilling to let Oz understand how many wrongs he was committing when he picked up his flask. But Oz didn’t seem suspicious, just nodded and agreed with a serious expression at appropriate moments, listening carefully.

“Complicated.” He nodded when Qrow was finished. “But it sounds like you settled things?”

“Mostly.” Qrow shrugged. “We both know what needs to change, and… well, I’m working on it.”

“Good.”

Qrow glanced guiltily down at his flask, thinking over the past four days and how many drinks he’d had that he could have gone without, of how many times he’d given up when no one was looking. Sure, he’d been drinking less, but not _enough_ less. But he knew he didn’t have the strength to go cold turkey; besides, that could easily land him in the hospital.

Thinking about the last few days made him remember his forgotten plans from Thursday morning, though, and he looked back up at Ozpin.

“Hey,” He began. “I wanted to ask you if we could meet up sometime soon.”

Ozpin looked mildly surprised, but nodded. “Of course. When were you thinking?”

“Uh… Well, it’s gotta be a weekend, right? Maybe next Sunday?”

He nodded again. “That works for me. Afternoon?”

“Sure. Maybe the Lookout again.”

“As long as the weather’s clear. If not, I suppose we could meet at The Lighthouse.”

“Yeah, that’d be nice. Haven’t been there in years.” He smiled. “Seems like it’s been a long time since we met outside this place.”

“Three weeks, from what I can remember.”

“Oh. Well… That feels like a long time to me.”

Ozpin smiled and ducked his head slightly. “I understand. It does feel like longer.”

Something gnawed at Qrow, some desire to speak the truth, to say something he’d regret. He bit it back and swallowed the thought, thankful for the distraction of another customer entering. But as he met Oz’s eye again once they were gone, he felt known in a way that struck him straight in the heart.

* * *

 

Ozpin stuck around for a long time, only leaving at past eight when the rain outside had slowed to a steady spit from the dark sky. Qrow waved him off, then went to take his break, fetching Winter from the kitchen to tend the bar. In there, work was winding down; they’d stop taking food orders in fifteen minutes, but already they were packing away leftovers from the day to store in the cooler. He stood back for a moment as An breezed by with a tub of shredded lettuce, and grabbed the last sad-looking chicken salad sandwich.

An returned to pick up the plate it had been on, stopping in her tracks when she found him eating it. He stared her down for a moment, thinking about her neat signature on a form in his employee file. They hadn’t seen much of one another since Thursday.

“Hey.” He said with his mouth full. “I wanna talk to you.”

They checked Amber could manage on her own for five minutes and An followed Qrow outside, closing the heavy door behind them.

“What do you need?” She asked, but the cheeriness in her voice was false.

He got straight to the point. “You signed that write-up form for Salem, didn’t you?”

She frowned. “Yes.”

“Why?”

A shadow seemed to cross her face and she folded her arms. “Because I always bow to her.”

“An, that’s not what I mean.” He sighed. “Why’d you tell me you didn’t _know_ if she saw my flask?”

“To save my job, Qrow!” She exploded. “This is all I have. She asked me to sign, she told me not to tell you, and I agreed because I can’t afford to lose my job! And I’m certainly not going to test my luck with it like you do!”

“You could have told me in secret! She’s not always here!”

“She sees everything.” Fear lit up in her eyes and she stepped closer to him. “If she doesn’t see it, she hears it. If she doesn’t hear it directly, someone tells her, eventually. And then what? We’d _both_ lose our jobs.” She turned away and bitterness entered her voice. “And _you_ were the one who told her we needed extra help in the kitchen. _You_ got me put on a twelve hour shift I can’t maintain, and now you’re going to come to me about _your_ problems?”

“An-”

“I’m searching for a new job.” She intoned. “I don’t regret getting you written up. I tried to help you and you threw it away, so my part is over. You are your own responsibility now.” She turned and walked back into the kitchen, closing the door with a deep slam.

Qrow heard her muffled voice from inside, and sat down heavily on the step, food all but forgotten. There was another person he’d turned against him. He would never have called An a real friend, but they had gotten on well the entire time they’d worked together, even if their relationship was solely professional. If she was angry enough to snap at him, then he must truly have hit rock bottom. And more urgently, if she was looking for a new job, then the ship was sinking. Which meant he needed to get on and do the same.

* * *

 

He spent most of Sunday on job search websites, updating and uploading his resume then trying to find somewhere that would take him. For now, he could afford to be picky, and turn down all the restaurant roles to look for bars and cafes. There wasn’t much to go on; the nearest bar manager role he was qualified for was in Patch, the Irish pub he’d taken his first bartending job in. Patch was a forty-five minute drive away, but he supposed that’d stop him drinking faster. He sent his resume their way and wondered if anyone who would recognise him still worked there.

He applied for a few more jobs over the course of the day; he’d skimmed through all the options several times over, lowering his standards each time. Eventually he’d been forced to apply for a couple of lower-level jobs, solely bartending roles that he knew they’d flag him as overqualified for. He had to try regardless, putting on a brave face for Ruby and Yang as they hovered around him, asking what he was doing and why. He just told them he needed a change. They didn’t need to worry about money and work for him.

His mind was on it all day on Monday, as he worked around Cinder’s attitude and started fighting her back for customers. He had turned on email notifications on his phone in case someone got back to him about his applications, and kept compulsively patting the outside of his pocket for it. She looked at him suspiciously, but as he never took it out, she couldn’t complain. By the end of her shift she’d taken to sullenly doing nothing, leaning on the countertop in front of the kitchen hatch. Qrow almost preferred it like that; at least she was out of his way.

The day stretched out, and Ozpin never showed up; Qrow hadn’t really been expecting him to. It made him feel a little lonely, but he comforted himself in knowing he would see him soon. Six days wasn’t long, not really. And while his patience in most aspects of life was thin, he could extend more of it to Ozpin. Something about him put him outside the bounds of how Qrow judged most people, in the same place as Ruby and Yang and Tai.

Qrow got more drunk than he had intended; he barely ate on his break, and by the time the kitchen closed, he was already feeling dizzy. Winter and Amber left together with a wave back to him, closely followed by An, picking her way around the tables without even a glance in his direction. Something like shame screwed up his stomach and he sighed. He understood her motivations; in her position, now that he had Ruby and Yang to think about, perhaps he’d have done the same thing. He was finding it hard not to be angry at her, but deep down, he knew it wasn’t her fault.

Salem was planning something, or had been planning for a while and was finally enacting it. There had to be more to it than a missing write-up if she was trying to oust him. But when he thought about it, that wasn’t all she was doing. She had put An on a shift she couldn’t cope with to get rid of her, too. As for Amber and Winter, he wasn’t sure what she was doing to them. Perhaps hoping that the pressure would be taken off them whilst An was working, so that when she wasn’t it would be piled back on in a way they could no longer tolerate.

He didn’t know the truth, but he was willing to look for it.

* * *

 

When he locked up the bar that night, drunk and swaying, he went into the kitchen before he left. There was a spare key to Salem’s office hidden in the tiny crack between the highest shelf and the wall, something not even the kitchen staff knew about. But Qrow had been here the few early mornings she’d come in, key carelessly forgotten, and he’d watched her dig it out of the gap with a long fingernail and drop it back as soon as the door was open. It was harder for him to grasp it, but he eventually pulled it down, and went to unlock the office.

There was a security camera pointed at the door, but he had a plan to deal with that. He stole inside and closed it behind him, then looked around the room. There wasn’t much to go on in here, and he was having trouble focusing, but the best place to start was the records. He couldn’t look through all of them; he’d be here until the bar opened again. But he could read everyone’s employee files and check the recent archives.

His own file looked the same as it had last time he’d seen it, only now his recent write-up form was inside. Cinder’s was empty apart from her first week’s timesheets and her personal details, which Qrow didn’t care enough to read through. To his surprise, Amber, Winter, and An all had write-up forms in their folders, all dated January third, all with a tick in the box titled ‘Insubordination’. The same sentence of explanation was written on each:

‘ _Refusal to accept new employee/new workload._ ’

Qrow sighed. Being proven right about Salem’s motivations didn’t shock him, but it did make his heart sink. He thought he was getting the picture now, albeit in small pieces. She wanted to drive out everyone she couldn’t control, everyone who knew she only cared about herself and maybe her few ‘associates’. Cinder had started working here to test who would let it happen and who would protest. Qrow hoped that Salem had been slowed by the fact that no one was willing to take her shit lying down.

He put the files back where they’d come from and pulled down a larger binder, heavy and filled to bursting with financial records and inventory forms and god only knew what else. He wasn’t sure what he would find or if it would be useful, but he opened it anyway, flipping through page after boring page until he reached a somewhat recent date. The register tally from Friday was the very last thing in the binder. It looked like his, at first, but the handwriting was wrong even though the formatting was right.

And as he looked closer, he realised the numbers were wrong too.

Friday had been a busy day; they’d pulled in one and a half times their average revenue. But Salem’s numbers suggested they’d barely reached average, and Qrow couldn’t remember the exact total but he knew this wasn’t it. He flicked back to the previous day, finding it the same, as well as the one before that, and before that. Every single one he looked at had been doctored the same way; she’d been taking his tallies and rewriting them with different numbers so that she could take a portion of the cash without anyone noticing. Of course, it was hers to take anyway; she owned the place, after all. But if there was no record of the cash, there would be no taxes to pay on it.

“Motherfucker.” Qrow muttered aloud.

Shakily, he got out his phone and took photos of the most recent few tallies, then put the binder back on the shelf. He hurried back to the bar, where he’d left tonight’s tally under the register, and took a photo of that too. He wanted evidence for when she inevitably rewrote it and destroyed his own. Feeling he had enough for now, he went back to the office. He still needed to deal with the cameras.

Salem had left her PC turned on, but locked, and he sat down at her desk to try to get in. The password was easy to guess: She’d never changed it from ‘admin1’. He rolled his eyes as the desktop popped in. He’d never thought much of her skills with technology, but that was ridiculous. Everything she ever used here was left open; clearly it was too much work for her to close and open them every day. It was all lined up on the taskbar at the bottom, and Qrow clicked on a few icons he didn’t recognise.

The first opened her email client, and Qrow went to move on, but his eye was caught by the subject title of a recent message.

‘RE: Pest problem’

He grimaced, thinking of cockroaches and exterminators, but hesitated. He’d never seen bugs in the bar except in summer when they flew in from outside. Curious, he clicked on the email; it had already been opened anyway. The sender was stylised simply as Hazel, and the message that Salem had sent to get the reply was listed first.

‘I appreciate your previous efforts, but I need more. This problem is not going to go away on its own. He needs more incentive, either an environment too toxic for him to continue working in, or to commit a fault he cannot be excused for. I’m sure that you can help.’

The reply was short and simple.

‘I’m sure I can. What do you need me to do?’

A chill slid down Qrow’s spine, fear and rage in equal measure. It would never fly in court, it was too vaguely worded, he was sure, but who else could they be referring to as 'he'? Qrow was the only man working at the bar. With shaking hands, he forwarded the email to himself, then deleted it from the sent items tab. There would still be evidence it had been sent, but he doubted Salem knew where to look for it or even that she could.

He turned his attention back to the taskbar and found the control panel for the security cameras. He switched off the one outside the door and downloaded the day’s footage, where it saved in hour long chunks. It took a long time to work, and in the meantime he dug through her video files for the day he’d been attacked. She had told him immediately after that there was no video evidence that Tyrian had been here. He wanted to know if she was lying.

He found the correct date and clicked into the folder, but there were pieces missing. Five hours where Tyrian had been inside the bar were simply gone, and the outdoor camera that would have caught the whole incident had no footage at all for the day. The day before and after were intact, so it hadn’t been a technical problem; Salem never got things fixed that quickly. No, this was malice, and it was all building up to be terrifying.

There was almost certainly a way to recover the old footage, but he wasn’t sure how to do it, or if it was too late. However, he was sure Salem was just as clueless, and when today’s video had finished downloading, he deleted the last hour to hide the evidence of him sneaking in. She would notice eventually, he was sure, but he thought he’d covered his tracks well. It might get him through until he found another job.

Finally, he locked the PC again, leaving the camera outside turned off, and left the office. Once he’d locked the door, he put the key back in the kitchen, positioning it in exactly the same way it had been before. Then he picked up his flask from the bar, turned out the lights, and left through the back door, his mind racing. He felt like a shitty TV detective, or a Hollywood spy who just found evidence of the Great Plot against him. Only he was sure he’d never seen a movie character shake the way he was, or feel like throwing up from anxiety.

He had never wished so hard to have been wrong.

* * *

 

Qrow found himself drinking at his usual levels again as the week progressed, sipping whiskey in the mornings while he continued to apply for every job he thought would have him. He couldn’t stop compulsively checking his emails, answering every unknown number call like it would be a recruiter and not a telemarketer. But he didn’t hear back from anywhere he’d applied, apart from the bar in Patch, whose owner sent him an apologetic email that they’d already filled the position.

He was having nightmares more frequently again, and lately it had been the same one over and over, sometimes twice in one night. The car crash and the blanket on the road and Tai screaming. He didn’t know why that particular trauma had been dug up so unceremoniously, but it wasn’t helping his drinking habits. He’d wake up hungover still with Tai’s voice in his head knowing that he was failing him, completely unable to stop his own steady fall back to where he’d started. And he’d drink with his breakfast to stave off the headache and feel his guilt creeping up his back.

He kept putting on a brave face for Ruby and Yang, though; he didn’t want them to worry. They didn’t seem to notice, though it wasn’t like he was spending much time with them; he’d been getting up too late to see them most days. Part of him wondered if, right now, it wasn’t better that way. He’d spend some time with them at the weekend before he saw Ozpin on Sunday, and he’d give them the sanitised version of events before he told Oz the whole truth.

He’d been keeping it to himself, because what else could he do? While Ozpin had been to the bar on Tuesday and Thursday, Qrow hadn’t been able to talk to him about the evidence he’d found in Salem’s office. It wasn’t worth the risk that she’d hear it, even second-hand. But Oz needed to know, especially given what she’d done to him in the past. And anyway, Qrow had no idea where to go from here, whether this was a police matter or whether the police could even help. Oz would know. He always knew what to do and say.

Friday was a slog, and Qrow was trying to curb his drinking with no success; an hour without a drink had him gritting his teeth in anticipation of another. He stopped trying after a while, serving customers as quickly as possible and picking up his flask as surreptitiously as he could. He hadn’t seen Salem leave, but she also hadn’t emerged from her office since six-fifteen. Her being shut up in there made him hope desperately that she hadn’t noticed his tampering with the cameras, or that she’d put it down to a malfunction and ignored it. He wondered if that was too much to ask.

It was just past nine, and the kitchen staff had all left, when the biggest man Qrow had ever seen walked in. He had tan skin and wore a long olive coat, and Qrow would have guessed he was seven feet tall if he had to put a number on it. He would have towered over even Ozpin, and his broad stature and muscular arms suggested a lazy kind of strength, the kind that came effortlessly. The man was so huge that Qrow almost didn’t see his companion entering behind him.

A lithe man with a long braid and a grin that seemed to reach from ear to ear.

Qrow froze as they slowly sauntered up to the counter. It felt like a scene from a western movie, where the piano player went silent and the whole saloon turned to look. But the music on the radio kept playing and the customers kept talking. It was only Qrow who couldn’t move.

The large man had to duck slightly to see past the menu boards and lean on the bar. “I’d like an Old Fashioned, please.” His voice was deep and rumbling.

Qrow didn’t pay attention to him; he was too busy watching Tyrian move nearer and stop with one elbow on the counter right beside the register, far too close for comfort.

“I’ll have a pisco sour.” He smirked.

Anger like fire flared up in Qrow until he felt he could taste the burning. His mouth turned down and he scowled. “What are you doing here?” He spat.

Tyrian looked around, wide-eyed with false innocence. “Me? I’m simply here for a drink with my dear friend here.” He patted his companion’s arm.

The bigger man pulled away, then looked back down at Qrow. “We just want our drinks, if you don’t mind.”

“No.” Qrow almost laughed. “No, I’m not fucking serving you. You know what you did.”

“Explain.”

“Your friend here scarred me for life!” Qrow pointed violently at Tyrian. “But I get the feeling you already know that, don’t you?”

Before either of them could say any more, Tyrian had reached across the counter and grabbed Qrow by the collar, dragging him closer until their eyes met only a few inches apart. “And I could do it again.” He snarled.

“Get the fuck off me!” Qrow tried to fight him off, rattling the glasses on the shelf below. Most of the room had now turned to look.

The big man raised his arms and spread them in a gesture that stilled the two or three customers who had been about to stand up. Silence fell, and he spoke. “No one needs to get hurt here. Tyrian, leave him alone.”

Qrow was dropped suddenly, and lashed out to try to punch Tyrian over the counter, missing by a good few inches. “Get out!” He yelled. “I’ll call the cops if you don’t leave!”

A door slammed in the side room and Salem swept in, eyes immediately fixed on Qrow with a freezing glare.

“Enough!” She shouted, and there was an edge to her voice he’d never heard before.

Everyone stopped, the large man with one hand wrapped around the back of Tyrian’s shirt collar, several customers quietly whispering among themselves.

“What is going on?” Salem hissed, stepping closer.

“He wouldn’t serve us.” The large man talked over whatever Tyrian was about to say. “And unfortunately my _friend_ here reacted poorly.”

“As anyone would.” She fixed her gaze on Qrow again. “Well? What do you have to say for yourself?”

Qrow was breathing heavily, shaking with adrenaline. “He _stabbed_ me. I’m not serving him.”

She sighed. “We’ve been through this before. He was not the one who attacked you!”

“And how would you know?” He snapped. “You weren’t there!”

“I reviewed the security footage, Qrow.”

He was tempted to mention the missing hours of video, but held his tongue. “I’m not serving them.” He repeated. “Write me up if you’re gonna, but I’m kicking them out.”

“I’m not going to write you up. This is a serious breach of the expectations of your job, and frankly, I’m sick of your attitude.” She paused. “You’re fired.”

All the air left Qrow’s lungs, another angry fire trying to start and immediately starving. “Wait-”

“No more! Get out from behind the bar and stop embarrassing yourself.”

Qrow grabbed his flask with trembling hands and stepped out from the bar area, unwittingly closer to Tyrian.

He was still being held in place, but he leaned as far in as he could and grinned.

“I’m sorry about this, Hazel.” Salem said to the large man.

Something clicked in Qrow’s head, and he remembered the emails, the ‘Pest problem’ that had been him, the other sender. Hazel. So this had all been a trap, a method to get him to quit or have him be fired because Salem had known how strongly he’d react to Tyrian. And he had been blind enough to fall for it.

He wanted to expose them right here and now, but it wouldn’t get him anywhere. He bit his tongue again, and settled for glaring at Salem as she smirked at him.

“I think you can go. I can deal with the paperwork myself.” She said calmly.

“If I don’t get a severance check you’re gonna know about it.” He growled.

“You’ll get what you deserve, I assure you.” Her voice went hard and she walked forwards to get in his face. “You’ve been talking to Ozpin, haven’t you? I’m sure you think you know everything you need to know.”

“I know more than you think I do.”

A brief flash of concern passed over her face, giving Qrow a little spark of satisfaction. But the scowl came back quickly. “If you’re still willing to associate with him, then you don’t know a damn thing.” She backed up and turned away. “Now, are you going to leave the premises of your own volition, or does Hazel have to escort you?”

He stared at the back of her neck for a moment, then nodded. “I’ll go. But this isn’t over.”

Tyrian giggled behind him, and Qrow scowled at him as well, then turned to walk out. He passed a table stacked with dirty glasses and casually pushed them all off as he went, most of them shattering on the hardwood floor. No one reacted before he was out of the bar, the heavy door swinging shut and any commotion that happened behind him drowned out.

He swigged from his flask as he walked, aimlessly. He couldn’t go home until he came up with a good excuse to tell Ruby and Yang why he was early; he certainly wasn’t going to let them know he got fired. There was anger in him, deep down, and fear a little closer to the surface, but on top of the roiling currents, he was calm. More than calm; he was numb. Now that the confrontation was over he couldn’t reach the things he should have been feeling. It all seemed like another nightmare, like he’d wake up and not have fucked his life up, or not have had his life fucked up for him.

But it had been his own doing, hadn’t it? Salem had baited him into a trap and he’d taken it at face value, even knowing she was plotting against him. Because he was dumb, and drunk, and above all, predictable. Self-assured to a fault. He could have just shut his mouth and served them; it wasn’t about pride or even about doing the right thing, it was about safety. Safety he didn’t have anymore, safety that he’d now deprived Ruby and Yang of.

In his head he heard the shattering of glass on repeat, over and over again.


	24. Endless Depths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow does damage control, and tells the kids and Ozpin what happened in the bar. Warnings: Flashbacks, character death, graphic injury description

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick update: First, the next chapter is going to be early, I'll be posting Friday morning instead of Saturday evening because I'm out of town. Secondly, forget everything I said about a schedule change, I got my shit together and I can keep up now. With that out of the way, I'm kinda still reeling from the last chapter, but hopefully this one goes down just as well. Enjoy!

Qrow woke up face down on the couch, fully clothed and with no memory of how he’d gotten there. His head throbbed as he pulled himself semi-upright, and the last shadowy shreds of a nightmare dissolved from his mind. The crash again; this time he was sure the sound of breaking glass had been what brought it back, because he’d woken up upon impact with the same cacophony loud in his ears. He sat up fully, and buried his head in his hands, letting himself remember what he could.

_After he’d been bodily escorted from the bar, Summer had fetched Tai and met him outside, where he’d sat on the curb to wait for them. He’d barely been able to stand up again, and so Tai had dragged him upright, grumbling all the while that Qrow had gotten them kicked out. Qrow had grumbled back that it wasn’t his fault if the floor was slippery. Summer had tucked herself under Tai’s arm as they walked back to the car, but she’d turned to him and smiled and shaken her head._

_‘You’re a disaster, Qrow.’_

_Tai had agreed, and they’d bundled him into the backseat and Summer had made sure he had his seatbelt on, then triple-checked that Tai was definitely sober. And then Qrow’s memory had gone dark until-_

He tried to shake it off. There was no need to think through it again, but now that he was on the track he couldn’t resist being dragged through it, the few glimpses he’d seen in the darkness, the gaps Tai had filled in for him later. Guilt bubbled in his chest, and grew as he remembered where he was now, what had happened last night. He frantically looked around for his phone, patting all his pockets and checking the table, then finally standing up and finding it wedged between the couch cushions, along with his keys.

He didn’t have any messages, and he sighed with relief at the sight of the blank screen. The battery was dying, though, and he took it to the kitchenette to charge, staggering slightly as he walked over to the counter where he always plugged it in. He didn’t know how much he’d had to drink last night, but it must have been a lot; it was nearly ten and he was still a little drunk. He went through his usual routine, sipping water and taking painkillers. For now, he decided against any more alcohol, but opened the liquor cabinet hoping for answers.

The bottle of expensive whiskey James had bought him for Christmas had about a third taken out of it, and the last dregs of the vodka had been emptied. His flask was in here too, also empty, and lying on its side. He took it out and rinsed it, then threw the vodka bottle into the recycling, silently cursing himself. However irresponsible he’d been lately, it was nothing compared to this. He had the urge to absolve himself of blame, to say that he’d only done this because he’d lost his job, but that had been his fault too. He had dug himself a grave, and now he had to lie in it.

He couldn’t find any evidence that he’d eaten last night, and hunger was setting in before his hangover for once. The idea of cooking made his head spin, though, so he just fixed himself a sandwich, chopping salad as slowly and cautiously as possible; his hands were starting to shake again. He was carefully constructing everything when he heard the door open behind him.

“Oh. Hey, Uncle Qrow.” Yang greeted him.

He turned to look as she and Ruby walked in, both still in their pyjamas.

She looked at him harder for a moment and frowned. “Are… You okay?”

“I’m fine.” He looked down at himself, unable to figure out what had made her ask. “Why?”

“Well… You’re still wearing your clothes from last night.”

“Oh. Right.” Qrow grimaced.

“Yeah, and you said you’d tell us why you came home early.” Ruby piped up.

His eyebrows raised. “I did?”

“Don’t you remember?”

He turned back to the counter and cut his sandwich in half with more force than necessary. “No. I don’t.”

“Well, do you wanna enlighten us?” Yang asked. When Qrow glanced over, she had her hands on her hips. She looked like Tai.

“Yeah. Sit down.”

Ruby and Yang took seats on the couch, and Qrow sat in the armchair, depositing his sandwich on the table for the time being. There was a long silence, and he looked between them, their wide-eyed expectant gazes. He wondered what kind of commotion they’d heard when he came in.

“Look, this is…” He sighed and started again. “You remember when I got… attacked, back in September?”

“Obviously.” Yang replied worriedly.

“The man who attacked me, Tyrian… he came to the bar last night, him and a friend. They tried to get me to serve them, and I… I told them to leave.” He took a deep breath. “Things may have gotten kinda violent.”

“You didn’t get hurt, did you?” Ruby asked. “Not again?”

“No, I didn’t get hurt. Just my pride.” He tried for a smile, but it quickly faded. “My boss… took his side, though. They’re friends. Instead of kicking them out… She kicked _me_ out. For good.”

Yang gasped. “What?”

“Yeah. I lost my job.”

“But you were defending yourself!”

“I never said it was fair.” He pressed his left hand to his face again. “I’ve been applying for other jobs already. With any luck I’ll hear back from one that actually wants me soon, but…” He trailed off and shook his head.

“But… isn’t there something you can do?” Ruby’s voice was small. “I mean, can’t you… Fight back? Make a petition to get your job back or, or something?”

Qrow couldn’t even summon a smile for her desperate optimism. “I don’t want the job back. I just wanted more time to find something else before I quit.” He looked at them again, and tried to lift his voice from the dull tone it had taken on. “But you don’t need to worry. I’ll get severance, or I will if Salem doesn’t want to get into serious trouble. And… Well, I’ve got some other stuff that’ll help, I think.” He glanced at his phone on the kitchen counter.

“What about right now?” Yang challenged. “We’re not gonna… starve, are we?”

For that he managed a quiet chuckle. “No, I’ve got savings. We’re just gonna have to take it easy on stuff we don’t need for a while. Just until I find another job.”

“Maybe Dad could help out if you ask him?” Ruby said.

Qrow snorted. “Maybe, if he doesn’t crucify me.” He sighed and imagined how apoplectically angry Tai would be when he heard. “Do me a favour, will you? Don’t tell him.”

“Why not?”

“He needs to hear it from me. And he doesn’t need to hear about it until it’s nothing to worry about. I don’t want him trying to solve my problems for me from five thousand miles away.”

“So, what do we do in the meantime? Just… carry on as normal?” Yang asked.

“As much as you can. You two have got cash left over from Christmas, so try and make it last. I might not be able to give you any more for a while.”

“Right. Well, if you need help-”

“I’m fine.” He said flatly. “Take care of yourselves. I’ll worry about me.”

Yang nodded. “Then, if everything’s normal, can we go out tonight?”

“Oh, yeah!” Ruby seemed to remember something suddenly. “Weiss wants us to go to her house while her dad’s out of the country!”

Qrow shrugged. “Yeah, sure. Why not?”

They both paused, glancing at each other and then back at him.

“You’re not… gonna ask when we’re going or when we’re coming home?”

“I imagine you two have got that figured out by now. Just text me when you’re coming home.”

“Actually, we were gonna stay the night.” Yang eyed him suspiciously. “That alright with you?”

“Yeah, fine. So you’ll be home tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow afternoon, yeah.”

“Fine.” He repeated. “Just… Take care of yourselves.”

“Okay. We’re leaving at two.” Yang got up. “Come on, Ruby, let’s get some food.”

Qrow watched them get up, and remembered his own sandwich sitting on the table. He ate it sullenly, his mind elsewhere and his mouth too dry for it to taste of anything but cardboard. He hadn’t been planning to tell Ruby and Yang that he’d been fired, but what else could he do? They had asked him to be honest with them for a reason, and he couldn’t keep the charade up forever. But now he’d promised that things would remain the same, he had to work for that to be the case. And if the raging pit in his stomach was going to be a long-term fixture, he wasn’t sure he was up to the task.

* * *

 

Qrow’s hangover started rearing its head just after midday, nausea seeming to slowly work its way up his body until he gave in and went to get a drink. The first shot of cheaper whiskey almost made him vomit into the sink, but he fought through it, then poured some of the expensive Japanese stuff into a rocks glass. After a few minutes he started feeling better physically, but then he was left undistracted with his drink and his mind. Stress was pulling at him, twisting his stomach into worse knots than any hangover could. There was so much that needed to be done, but he couldn’t bring himself to act. Just stayed where he was, laid out on the couch not really watching TV.

He barely looked up when Ruby and Yang left at two, dressed for the rain he could hear spattering against the window again. All he could summon was a half-hearted wave and a grunt in reply to their shouted goodbyes. It was a relief when the front door slammed shut. He did, eventually, drag himself up to take off last night’s clothes and shower, once the whiskey had balanced him out again. When he wiped the condensation off the bathroom mirror he found that there was a thin red stripe around the back and left side of his neck, where his collar had dug into his skin when Tyrian had grabbed it. He avoided his reflection’s eye and went to get dressed, still rubbing at the mark to feel the sting.

He was wallowing, he knew, and he didn’t like to, but it was hard to shake off the weight of everything he’d done wrong to get to this point. It was one thing to let self-pity overtake him, but that wasn’t what this was, not wholly. Mostly it was self-loathing, the ugly beast that manifested in the dullness of his eyes in the mirror, the constant uncomfortable concealment of the scars that laced his body. It was looking at himself and seeing something that shouldn’t exist, just like his parents had trained him to all those years ago.

Knowing it was learned behaviour didn’t help him kick the habit.

* * *

 

The day wore on, and Qrow kept drinking as the rain stopped and the sky and the ocean stained an identical peachy-pink. He leaned over the back of the couch looking at it through the window, the rough outline of the fiery sun imprinted on his eyelids when he blinked. His hands had not stopped shaking all day, and now he had them clenched around the couch cushion so hard it hurt. The apartment felt stifling, but he had nowhere else to go. He half-wished he was at work; Cinder would have been leaving soon, and he could have talked to Ozpin and felt like at least someone understood him.

He wondered what was going on at the bar now, whether Winter and Amber were surprised at what had happened. An wouldn’t be, and if Qrow’s suspicions that Cinder was in on Salem’s plot were correct, then neither would she. He looked towards his phone again, still in its place on the counter; he hadn’t felt the need to go near it again. A sense of urgency rose in his chest, a will to do something, to tell someone what was going on before anyone else got hurt. If An’s job search was going as well as his, then she would soon end up in the same situation. And Amber and Winter would have no idea what was going to hit them.

He was going to see Ozpin tomorrow, and he could tell him about all of this; it was a small comfort. But then what about tonight? Would Ozpin show up at the bar expecting to see him? Who would be bartending in his place? Cinder, or Salem? Either way, Oz was not likely to find himself welcome. Qrow got up and fetched his phone. He needed to know what was going on, at least, so that he could make his own decision as to whether to visit the bar or not.

Qrow went to send a text, but changed his mind and clicked to call him instead. He waited tensely as it rang.

“Hello?” Ozpin finally answered.

“Hey, Oz.” Qrow sighed, the tension slipping out of his stiff shoulders.

“I thought you would be at work. Are you alright?”

“Not really.” He rubbed a hand over his face. “I just… I need to tell you that… I lost my job. I got fired. So… I’m not gonna be at the bar tonight, and it’ll probably be Salem who took my shift.”

There was a long silence down the line, broken only by a distant clatter and Ozpin taking a deep breath. “Would you like to meet up now? I’m free all evening.” He said quietly.

Qrow’s stomach twisted up again. “Are you sure that’s alright?”

“Of course.”

“Then yeah. Please.” The words came out a little desperate, and he winced.

“Where should we meet?”

“Uh… Well, I’ve been drinking, so I can’t drive.”

“Then I’ll come to you.” Ozpin’s voice was determined and hard. “You’re at home, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes. We can walk to the Lookout if you like.”

“Yeah. That sounds good.” He hesitated. “Thank you, Oz.”

“It’s no problem. I want to be sure that you’re alright.”

They said their goodbyes and Qrow got ready for a foray into the chilly evening air; the rapidly-darkening sky would be bringing cold wind with it. He grabbed a jacket and put on his scarf, and as an afterthought, filled his flask with cheap whiskey. He didn’t feel drunk enough to talk about this yet, but with any luck, he soon could be. After a sip from the bottle for good measure, he tucked the flask into his pocket, just in time for Ozpin to text from the parking lot.

He locked the apartment door behind him and hurried downstairs, meeting Ozpin on the walkway right outside, cane clutched in his right hand. He looked up at the sound of the door automatically latching, and their eyes met. The look he gave Qrow was almost heartbroken, and as soon as he was close enough he reached out and touched his shoulder with his left hand. Qrow felt the desperate urge to cling to him, to hug him or take his hand or just touch him, somehow. He didn’t allow himself to even try.

“Hey.” His voice came out thin.

Ozpin seemed to hesitate looking for something to say. “Shall we walk?” He finally asked.

Qrow nodded, and they started across the parking lot as Ozpin dropped his hand. “I’m sorry for dragging you out here.”

“You didn’t drag me anywhere. I can assure you, you couldn’t if you tried.” Oz smiled, but it quickly dropped when he realised Qrow’s mood would not be so easily lifted. “Where would you like to start?”

“Hold on.” He reached into his pocket and grabbed his flask, then took a large sip. The burn made him cough, and Ozpin frowned.

“Are you sure-”

Qrow waved a hand impatiently. “I’m fine. It’s fine.” He put his flask away again. “Yeah, I got fired.”

“Under what circumstances?”

He sighed. “Tyrian came back to the bar. And another guy, Salem called him Hazel. Put simply, there was a fight. Salem came running and… Said she was sick of me. Fired on the spot for refusing to serve them.”

“I’m sorry, Qrow.” Ozpin said quietly.

They crossed the street towards the seafront road, and Qrow shrugged. “Nothing you could have done. Although, maybe there’s something you could help me out with now.”

“I’ll do what I can.”

Qrow took out his phone and navigated to the photos he’d taken on Monday night. “I think this whole thing was a set-up. I should have had one more warning before I got fired, which as far as I know violates the terms of my contract. And I snuck into Salem's office the other day and found fucked up financial records and deleted camera footage. She’s been up to something.” He shook his head and handed his phone to Ozpin. “The first image is one of my register tallies. The second and third are ones that she’s rewritten to have lower totals.”

Ozpin swiped back and forth between the images, expression darkening. “History repeats itself.” He murmured.

“Right. I thought you’d wanna know because of… the non-profit.”

He nodded, and handed back Qrow’s phone. “So she’s committing tax evasion. I suppose it could be worse.”

“Oh, it is worse.” Qrow closed the photos and opened his email app, quickly finding the forwarded ‘RE: Pest problem’ in the subject bar. “The missing camera footage was on the day Tyrian attacked me. Five hours missing from inside the bar, and the whole day gone from the backlot. That was no accident; she deleted it. She must have lied to the cops. And I found this email.”

Ozpin took his phone again and slowed his walking pace as he read, his eyebrows raising and knitting into a distressed frown. When he lowered the screen, he shook his head. “This is beyond even what I would have expected of her.”

“Yeah. It’s like that, isn’t it?” He took his phone back and pocketed it again. “It seems like she planned everything. Down to Tyrian attacking me the first time. And now… I mean, I’ve got the evidence, but I don’t know what to do with it.”

“I’m not sure myself. But perhaps I can help you find out.”

They crossed the empty beach parking lot and followed the short trail up to the Lookout. Qrow threw himself down on the right of the bench, and Ozpin took a seat at his left. Neither of them spoke for a moment, but Qrow got out his flask and took another sip of whiskey. His hands were shaking again, and now the cold breeze was making his knuckles ache as he clenched them.

“And I really thought things couldn’t get any worse.” He snorted and shook his head. “How naïve is that?”

“It’s not naïve to hope.” Ozpin set his cane against the bench on his left and turned a little to face Qrow. His eyes had taken on a coppery colour from the reflection of the setting sun’s last rays. “I can’t imagine how difficult this is for you. Have you told Ruby and Yang yet?”

“Yeah, they know.” Qrow gazed out over the ocean, remembering his morning, and the scattered memories of the night before. He’d been here, he thought, but he couldn’t be sure. He decided to keep that to himself. “They didn’t seem too phased, but… I told them everything would be fine.”

“And will it?”

“I don’t know.” He shook his head. “I can try to make sure it is. We’re not gonna run out of money anytime soon, but I still haven’t heard back from anywhere I’ve applied to. At this rate I’m gonna run out of places that’ll take me. It’s not like there’s much to choose from here.”

Concern that had already been in Ozpin’s expression grew, and he rested his hand on Qrow’s knee. Qrow was thrown back to before Tai had left, when they’d sat together like this. And back to years before when that same gesture had meant something even deeper, an exchange of touch saying something neither were brave enough to put into words. He drew a ragged breath, but Ozpin spoke before he could:

“If there’s anything I can do to help, anything at all, please ask. I don’t want to impose or presume, but… I know that getting through this will be a struggle.”

Qrow simply nodded, and plucked up the courage to look him in the eye. “Thanks. I think I’m fine for now, but… We’ll see how things go.”

“Of course.” He withdrew his hand, resting instead on his other wrist in his lap. “Aside from the more practical side of things… how are you feeling? I imagine you must be stressed.”

Qrow huffed a mirthless laugh. “Yeah, you could say that.” He shook his head and took out his flask again. “It’s been bad since I went back to work. Nightmares again.”

“The same ones as before?”

“Sometimes. It’s mostly just been one lately. Sometimes more than once a night.” He took a deep draught of whiskey and rested the flask on the bench at his side.

Ozpin didn’t ask him to elaborate, but under that sad stare there was little else he could do.

“I’ve been seeing the accident. What parts of it I can remember, anyway. On Tuesday it’ll be thirteen years.” He sighed deeply. “I didn’t see much, but I… I was told what happened, later. Sometimes I see it like I saw it then, but sometimes… well, my mind fills in what I missed. Probably worse than how it really happened.” Even as he spoke he saw flashes of it, blood on the road and a mangled frame conjured entirely by his twisted imagination. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment.

“You don’t have to talk about it if it’s too hard for now.” Ozpin said gently.

“I do.” He opened his eyes and looked out into the rapidly descending night. “I need to.”

“Then I’m here to listen. But please take your time.”

Qrow nodded and took a moment to gather his thoughts. “We went out. Me, Tai, and Summer. We left the kids with a sitter for the night because one of us had been with them at all times for pretty much four months straight. It was our night off. We were driving to this bar up in Newport, so there was a bit of a fight about who was gonna stay sober and drive. Well, Summer had done it the last two times, so it was between me and Tai. I chugged a drink before we left so he wouldn’t have a choice. It was selfish. I still wonder what… what might have happened differently if I’d been driving.”

“You can’t live in the past, Qrow. What’s done is done.”

He looked at him sideways, somewhat irritated. “Sure, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think about it.” He ducked his head as he got back on track. “Nothing much happened while we were in the bar, except I got too drunk and fell over my own feet and got kicked out. Summer and Tai wouldn’t leave me to hang around, so we all left. It was… just after one, I think. My memory’s spotty. They put me in the backseat, and I passed out, and we headed off. We… We didn’t even make out of town.”

Ozpin’s eyes were wide, and this time he prompted him. “What happened?”

Qrow’s voice scratched as he continued. “This is all just what Tai’s told me from here. We got to an intersection; we were first in line at the lights. Our light changed, and as we were crossing the intersection a station wagon ran the red on our right. They said he was going maybe eighty, guy had a ridiculous blood alcohol content; something like four times the limit. He wasn’t wearing a seatbelt, either. He got ejected from the car and died on the other side of the street.” He paused and forced his voice to steady. “His car was a lot heavier than ours. Ours got crushed from the right side, mostly around the front passenger seat. The impact warped the whole frame bad enough that my leg got trapped where I was sitting behind Tai. So…”

Oz reached out to touch him again, but Qrow pulled his hand away even as his throat grew tight.

He spoke through the feeling, forcing the words out. “They said she died on impact, quickly and painlessly, but… they say that to everyone. Her entire upper body was crushed. Even if she’d survived the blood loss she’d eventually have suffocated. Both her lungs were punctured, her collar bone snapped, and… her arm broke so badly it tore through her skin. Her jaw was broken, and the wounds she got from the glass would have blinded her. I never saw her, really, but Tai did. He screamed like… Like I’ve never heard a person scream.” Tears were silently running down his face now, but he ploughed on. “She was pronounced dead on the scene. I kinda came to as they put me in the ambulance and I saw… A sheet on the road, and… and her underneath.”

He could no longer take it. A sharp exhale turned into a sob, and one into many more. He pressed his left hand over his eyes, and this time when Ozpin reached out he didn’t resist. The hand on his shoulder was reassuring and steady, even though it didn’t fix anything, even though it couldn’t. It made him think of the first time they’d met up here, all those months ago. How he’d resisted the urge to get closer to Ozpin, an urge that was rising in him again now and would not be ignored.

He leaned in closer, and Ozpin read the signals right away, wrapping his arms tightly around him. Qrow copied, finding himself clinging to the back of his coat like his life depended on it, and buried his face in his shoulder as unsteady breaths he could not control continued to rack his body. Ozpin’s hand went to his head, stroking his hair gently and repeatedly, a soft soothing motion that was almost lost in everything else Qrow was feeling.

“It’s alright.” Ozpin whispered.

“It’s not.” Qrow choked.

“But it will be.”

Qrow didn’t have a reply for that, though several circled his mind. All of them would come out rude, and Ozpin meant well, that was what was important. He calmed his breathing almost forcefully, gritting his teeth and still clinging to Ozpin tightly. Finally, he opened his sore eyes and loosened his grip, prompting Oz to do the same. His hand dropped from Qrow’s hair and they leaned away from one another; not quite to their previous distance, but enough to look at each other.

“I’m sorry.” Qrow wiped his eyes on his hands.

“You needn’t be.” Ozpin pulled a pack of tissues out of his coat pocket and handed one to Qrow. “You’re grieving. It’s only natural.”

Qrow blew his nose inelegantly and picked up his flask again. “I should be done by now. Tai is. Even Ruby and Yang. I’m the only one who’s still hanging on.”

“Why do you think that is?”

“I don’t know.” He said impatiently. “If I knew that maybe I could do something about it.”

“Well, only you and Taiyang were present for the accident. It’s likely that it’s the trauma that’s still affecting you so strongly, and that it’s simply feeding your grief.”

“But why has Tai gotten over the trauma? He was… they were gonna get married, they were in love! I don’t get it.”

Ozpin continued mildly. “From what you’ve told me, Taiyang has been receiving mental health treatment for a long time. It’s possible that his medication and therapy has helped him just as much with his trauma as his anxiety.”

The slightly knowing tone in his voice made Qrow frown again. “What are you suggesting?”

“I’m not suggesting anything. Merely stating my opinion on the matter.”

He sipped whiskey again, clenched his jaw against the burn as he put the flask away. “It sounds like you’re trying to say ‘I told you so’ without really saying it.” The anger in his voice was unreasonable, but he couldn’t conceal it.

Ozpin’s eyes widened. “I’m not saying anything of the sort. If you’d really like to know what I think, yes, I believe medication and therapy could help you. I have always believed that. But you know yourself best, and I’ll support you how I can whatever you choose.”

“You know, I chose a long time ago.”

“I know.” Ozpin murmured, looking away.

For some reason, this heightened Qrow’s ire even further, and his voice rose almost without his input. “You really think I want to be like this? Fucking dreading sleep because I know I’ll see someone I love bleeding out on the road?”

“I think you’re too stubborn and set in your ways to realise that things could be different.” There was a bitter, commanding tone to Oz’s voice.

Qrow recoiled and gave him a disgusted look. “Stop using your teacher voice on me! I’m not a kid!”

“Neither are many of my students. But we all need a stern voice to remind us of the right direction now and then.”

“Yeah, well I passed that crossroads years ago.” He spat. “I’m going this way, and there’s no going back.”

Ozpin shook his head. “It’s never too late to change, Qrow.”

He sighed and it turned into a growl. “Why does everything you say have to be some philosophical statement? Why don’t you just tell me to fuck off in straight words like everyone else?”

“I can assure you, that isn’t what I mean.” Ozpin’s voice got sharp. “Not only do you do yourself a disservice by believing that, you insult the people who are trying to help you. Personally, I find it extremely hurtful that you assume I’m being disingenuous.”

Qrow snorted. “Oh, well I’m sorry that _my_ debilitating problems are hurting you. Not like you have the faintest fucking idea-”

“Do not presume to know I haven’t suffered like you, Qrow, because I have!” He raised his voice, and it caught slightly. “I put years of time and effort into healing. And unless you are willing to do the same, then I don’t think that I can help you.”

“Good.” Qrow stood up. “I don’t want your help. Not now.”

He walked away, stumbling into the blue-tinted night.


	25. Two Steps Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow wallows at rock bottom, and tries to keep himself together for his family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early chapter! Everyone loves an early chapter, especially after the mess we left Qrow in last chapter. I'm away until Monday, but I'll be reading all your comments even though I can't respond!

The light coming in the window was far too bright as, for the second day in a row, Qrow woke up unsure where he was, or how he’d gotten there. At least this time, once he got his bearings, he realised he was in his own bed, and not fully clothed. He was, however, disgustingly nauseous, and he felt like the whole room was spinning around him. He tried to pull himself upright, and his mouth filled with saliva. Panic flooded him, and he almost fell out of bed, hurriedly untangling himself from the duvet before running to the bathroom. He reached it just in time, vomiting copiously into the toilet and then falling to his knees on the tile.

A wave of pain flooded down his left leg and he repositioned himself as his stomach churned. He couldn’t remember much of where he’d been after he’d left Ozpin at the Lookout, and the thought of what he’d done and said made him feel sick in an entirely different way. Some of his words were distorted in his mind, retroactively scrubbed out by the alcohol, but what he could remember was bad. He leaned on the wall, breathing heavily and fighting his disorientation as the squiggly lines on the fake marble tiles seemed to move. His eyes were sore and dry as he rubbed them.

He sat there for a few more minutes, but no more vomit was forthcoming. Instead, he spat a few times and flushed, then got up slowly and carefully to swill mouthwash until he couldn’t taste bile anymore. There was no point brushing his teeth yet; there would be more to come. He wandered aimlessly back to his bedroom and picked the comforter up from the floor, dumping it untidily back onto the bed. His phone was on the nightstand, and he picked it up and turned it over to find that the screen was cracked across the top left corner. He could only summon a sigh as he turned it on.

Ozpin had tried to call him three times: Once not long after he’d left the Lookout, once later in the night, and once about two hours ago, at 9 am. After that it seemed he’d given up and just sent a text:

‘ _Please just let me know you’re alright._ ’

Qrow stared at it for a moment, unblinking. There was no anger in the words; maybe frustration, desperation, but no anger. He could barely bring himself to type a reply, and his hands were shaking anyway, but he sent two words in return.

‘ **I’m alive** ’

He put on some sweatpants but didn’t bother with a shirt: It wasn’t warm in the apartment but he was sweating unpleasantly. Then he dropped his phone into his pocket and headed for the living room, feeling his legs wobbling with every step. His clothes were strewn around, his jacket on the couch and everything else but his underwear on the floor. He left them there for now and just moved the jacket, but found it unusually heavy. When he checked the pockets, he found his wallet, keys, and empty flask, along with a receipt.

He left everything else on the coffee table and read the receipt. It was from the liquor store on the seafront road, and had been issued at nearly 10 pm last night. Two bottles of vodka and one of whiskey. He screwed it up and tossed it into the trash, then strode over to the liquor cabinet. The expensive whiskey James had bought him was empty, and one of the handles of vodka had been opened. He couldn’t restrain a groan, slamming the cabinet shut and then screwing up his eyes at the heavy pain flaring in his head.

His phone vibrated in his pocket, and he panicked again; if Tai called he didn’t think he could act natural, especially not with nausea brewing in his stomach again. He pulled the phone out tentatively and looked at the caller ID. It was Ozpin. For a moment he just looked down at it, debating what to do, what he could say to make everything okay. All he could think about was how terrible he felt, too wrapped up in himself to change anything.

He silenced the call and put his phone away to pour a glass of water.

He sat down on the couch with his drink and sipped it as slowly as he could bear to when his mouth was so dry. Even so, every few swigs he’d have to run to the bathroom to vomit again, until eventually all that was coming up was water, bile, and acid. Finally, exhausted and with stomach muscles aching, he took himself back to bed, hoping a nap would set him right.

* * *

 

The sound of the front door slamming dragged him out of sleep again, and he heard Ruby’s voice in the hall.

“Oops! Sorry Uncle Qrow!” There was a pause, and she called again from further away. “Uncle Qrow?”

Qrow sat up cautiously, and while his head still hurt he no longer felt like vomiting. He got up and opened the door, peering out into the hallway where Ruby and Yang were hanging up their coats.

Ruby looked over at the sound of the latch, and smiled brightly. “There you are. Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” He winced at the rough scratch in his voice. His throat was sore. “Just took a nap. I’m gonna get dressed, I’ll be with you in a minute.”

“What are we having for dinner tonight?” Yang asked.

He shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe we should order food.”

“On Sunday? In Vale?”

“Oh. Yeah, okay, I’ll figure something out.” He closed the door and sighed. He had even lost track of what day it was.

He got dressed and went to brush his teeth, now that he was certain he’d finished throwing up. His head was really pounding now, and his hands were shaking violently. A drink would likely make him feel better, but he didn’t want Ruby and Yang to notice that he’d gone back to his old ways. Not that he’d ever really stopped, but for a few days he’d really felt like he was getting somewhere. God, Tai would be so disappointed in him. They all would be. Ozpin would too, probably already was, but that made his throat hurt even more so he forced himself to stop thinking about it.

Ruby and Yang were still putting their stuff away when he entered the kitchen again, so he quickly poured a decent measure of whiskey into a glass and topped it up with apple juice. A mixed drink was better for him anyway; he was still dehydrated and he needed energy. The first sip was like heaven, the cold juice making him feel a little better even before he took the painkillers he needed. He was thankful that the worst hangover he’d had in years was finally waning, but it was still bothering him how much he’d had to drink. With a built-up tolerance like his, it took a lot to make him sick like that.

He started searching the cabinets, fridge, and freezer for something for dinner, but was soon interrupted by Ruby and Yang reappearing.

“Uh… Did you lose something?” Yang asked from the living area.

He looked over to see her holding up the jeans he’d left on the floor. He’d almost forgotten the clothes were there; he’d just been stepping over them all day. “Oh. Yeah, sorry.” He went over and took them from her, picked up his shirt and socks, and tossed them all into the laundry hamper in the hall.

“So…” Ruby twiddled her thumbs awkwardly as he walked back in. “Did you find anything for dinner? Or are we having pizza because it’s the only place that’s open?” She asked hopefully.

“There’s pizza in the freezer.” Qrow replied, and went to get it out.

“Well, next best thing, I guess.” She sat down at the dining table.

“Right.” He removed the packaging from the large pizza, seeing his unsteady hands through a haze he couldn’t push through. He knew he was acting weird, and he tried to settle himself a little, clear his foggy mind. “So, did you two have fun at Weiss’s place?”

Yang sat down opposite Ruby and they exchanged glances. “Well… Yeah, I guess?”

Qrow raised an eyebrow. “You guess?”

“It was fun, it was just… weird.” Yang knitted a hand into her hair and rested her elbow on the table. “Weiss’s dad is away, and her sister moved out a while ago, so it’s just her and her mom and her younger brother. But the house is huge. Like, it’s a mansion basically.”

“Yeah and it’s so… empty. Like James’s living room times a hundred.” Ruby grimaced. “It’s pretty but there’s nothing in it.”

“Hm.” Qrow put the pizza in the oven, thinking about what Ozpin had told him about Jacques Schnee, and what Winter had said about the school’s attempts to help, all shot down or deflected. “Nothing bad happened, though?”

Ruby frowned. “No, why would it?”

“I’ve just… heard things.”

“Well, I’m not surprised.” Yang intoned. “Weiss’s mom honestly might as well have not been there. I don’t think she spoke to us once. She just… watched us whenever we were nearby.”

“I wish Whitley hadn’t spoken to us.” Ruby grumbled.

“Ugh, he’s a little brat. I’m glad Weiss could make him go away, he was unbearable.”

“Sounds like you didn’t have _that_ much fun.” Qrow said.

“It wasn’t that bad.” Ruby shook her head, and a small smile appeared on her face. “Weiss is a really nice person, way nicer than most of her family. We had a good time once it was just us. She showed us around the whole house and we ate _so_ much food.”

“Oh my god, yeah. They had such a good snack selection!” Yang exclaimed. “They have so much money that they just… import the stuff they want from all over the world.”

Qrow snorted and shook his head. “Rich people.”

“They’re not so bad.” She shrugged. “Weiss is pretty generous, once you get to know her.”

“I remember when you two thought she was the worst person in the world.”

“Things change.” Ruby smiled. “Weiss certainly has.”

The pizza didn’t take long to cook, and Qrow sliced it and placed it on a tray in the middle of the dining table. Despite not eating since the night before, he barely felt like it now, and just grabbed one slice. He topped up his drink with more apple juice and whiskey while Ruby and Yang were distracted, then went to sit on the couch to eat. He read the news on his phone and tuned out their conversation, rolling his eyes at a new political scandal and finding himself thankful for a reason not to think. If he focused on the world around him, there was no need to work on himself.

* * *

 

It was five o’clock when Ruby’s phone rang, echoing on the dining table. She checked the contact and then pulled Yang up, both of them hurrying out of the room as she answered.

“Hi, Dad!”

Qrow briefly heard Tai’s voice, made scratchy through the speaker. Ruby and Yang liked to talk to Tai together, and Tai always liked to call Qrow right after. The thought made his stomach churn like he would vomit again; he would have to tell him the truth soon. That he’d lost his job, and that he’d stopped trying to quit drinking, just like Tai had said. He didn’t know whether to expect a chewing out or quiet disappointment. He didn’t know which would be worse.

Qrow stewed in his anxiety for almost an hour before his phone finally rang, and he checked that it was actually Tai calling before he answered.

“Hey, Tai.” His voice came out a little strained, and he cleared his throat.

“Hey, how’s it going? Are you okay?” Tai’s voice was cheerful, if a little worried.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just been hanging out, doing nothing all day.” He lied. “You?”

“I’m great, thanks. It’s been a good week, everything’s going well. Kids got some exam results back and they’re doing great.”

“Oh, that’s good. You must be doing your job right.”

Tai chuckled. “I like to think so. So, what have you been doing all week?”

“Same as usual. Working my ass off.” Qrow tried to sound wearily joking.

“You’re gonna work yourself to death. Seventy-two hours a week is… That’s a lot.”

“Yeah, well, it keeps me busy. It’s not like it’s that taxing.”

“Well, I sure as hell couldn’t do it.”

“And I sure as hell couldn’t teach ESL. I didn’t even get through school for that.”

“I know.” Tai paused. “Do you ever think about going back and trying college again?”

Qrow grimaced to himself. “No, not really. Didn’t enjoy it that much the first time.”

“Maybe you could get out of that shitty bar if you had a degree, though.”

He squeezed his eyes shut in frustration for a moment. “Sure, but I’d be in a lot of debt by the end of it. Would it really be worth it?”

“That’s for you to decide.” Tai replied genially. “I’m not trying to pressure you into it. If you’re happy where you are, that’s great.”

“Well, I’m happy enough.” Qrow said without smiling. “I don’t wanna pick up my whole life and move just yet.”

“Yeah, of course. I understand that pretty well.” Tai sighed. “Oh, uh… I wanted to ask you something.”

“Yeah?”

“Are you… getting anywhere with that friend of yours?” The smile came back into his voice.

Qrow snorted. “No, not really. We… Well, we had an argument. Last night, actually.” He bit his lip, not sure why he was suddenly telling the truth.

“Oh, really? That’s a shame. What did you argue about?”

“It was just, uh… personal stuff, you know? I don’t really wanna get into it. But I’m pretty sure I fucked up.”

Tai sighed again. “Qrow, you’re not very good at this whole dating thing, are you?”

“Says you.”

“Yeah, alright, noted. But seriously. Do you not remember what I told you?”

“I know what you told me.” Qrow answered impatiently. “Look, it was… we were talking about personal stuff, and he insulted me without really meaning to. I was a reactive idiot, and I insulted him deliberately.”

“Oh, _Qrow_.” Frustration saturated his name in Tai’s voice. “You’re right, you’re an idiot.”

“You don’t need to tell me that.”

“Well, have you tried fixing things?”

“No, I just… I don’t think he’ll wanna talk to me.”

“Why don’t you at least try? Just reach out and apologise. He’ll either accept it or he won’t.”

“I don’t think he’ll wanna hear it.”

“Then text it to him or something. I don’t know, just make sure he knows you’re not the asshole you came across as. And most importantly, don’t do it again!”

“Yeah, Tai, I know.” Qrow’s exasperation leaked into his voice. “I understand how apologies work.”

“Well no offence, but sometimes I feel like I gotta check.”

“Great, thanks.”

Tai was silent for a moment, and when he spoke again his voice was softer. “How’s the drinking going?”

Qrow tried to level himself too, to sound nonchalant as he lied through his teeth. “A little better. I’m still drinking, I can’t just quit altogether, but I’m slowing down.”

“Good.” Tai sounded relieved. “Even at work?”

“Yeah, even there.”

“Well, hey, that’s… that’s really great. I’m really proud of you for that. I hope you can keep going.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“That’s all you can do. And listen, if you _do_ slip up, and I’m not saying you will, but… if you do, no one’s gonna love you any less, or think any less of you. You can pick yourself up and start again until you get it.”

A lump rose in Qrow’s throat and he worked hard to swallow it. “Thanks, Tai. I really appreciate that.”

“We’re all behind you. Every step of the way.”

The conversation wrapped up quickly from there, and when Qrow hung up the call he tossed his phone onto the couch cushion next to him and wiped his damp eyes. Guilt that had been festering in him had grown and grown until it seemed to take up his whole body, creeping up his spine at every opportunity. Lying to Tai like that, talking about Ozpin when there were more important things going on, everything he’d _done_ to Ozpin to get to this point in the first place; it was like a mountain he had to climb. And here he was at the bottom, living in its comfortable shade because it was easier.

He picked up his phone again and stared at the blank screen. He knew that Tai was right, and that he needed to apologise to Ozpin if he ever wanted to repair the wrong he’d done. But something, whether pride or shame, was stopping him, like a heavy weight on his chest that would not let him make the right moves. He turned the phone on, and the little red missed call number seemed to taunt him. All he would have to do was click on Ozpin’s name and call him back. He just couldn’t.

He threw it down again and drained his drink, then got up for another. This time he skipped the apple juice and poured cheap whiskey over ice, his eyes glazing over slightly as he stared at the rising level. Bits of Ruby and Yang’s conversation were audible through the wall; he was putting away the bottle when he heard what was undoubtedly his name. He paused for a moment, still and barely breathing, but from here everything was muffled. Cautiously, he moved closer to the wall, leaning his head against it instead of going all the way to pressing his ear to it.

“-Just really worried about him.” Yang’s voice was quiet, but clear.

“But, I mean… He’s an adult, right? He can take care of himself.” Ruby’s uncertain tone came from a little closer to the wall.

Yang snorted. “Ruby, just ‘cause someone’s an adult, doesn’t mean they’re perfect.”

“I know that, but… He’s Uncle Qrow.”

“Yeah, that’s what I mean.”

There was a pause before Ruby spoke again, her voice low. “Don’t you think he’s gonna be alright?”

“No. I think he’s given up. He probably thinks he’s being sneaky but I’ve seen how much he’s drinking. Didn’t you see the bottles in the recycling?”

Ruby sighed. “Yeah. Well… Maybe we should tell Dad, then.”

“I don’t know. Dad can’t come home at a moment’s notice like that, and if Qrow can’t take care of us, where do you think we’ll end up?”

There was a long silence, and Qrow clenched his fists on the other side of the wall.

“So what _should_ we do?” Ruby asked.

“Wait and see, I guess.” There was a resigned tone in Yang’s voice. “I mean, like he said, we’re not gonna starve. If we have to take care of ourselves for a bit, then we can. He was _almost_ okay tonight, but... it’s like he’s not quite there.”

“He just looks so sad all the time since Dad left. Do you think he really misses him?”

“I mean… Maybe? You know how close they are. But I think it's more to do with his job.”

“He has been looking for something new. Maybe it's making him stressed.”

“I don’t know, Rubes. Let’s just… give it a week or so and see if he gets better.”

Qrow stopped listening and moved away from the wall. His throat felt tight again but he refused to give in to it, just picked up his fresh drink and took a sip. He leaned on the counter, palms pressed flat against the surface, and ducked his head. This who he’d become, then. A failure so bad even his nieces were worried: A liar, a drunk, and a scumbag. Truly living up to all his parents’ dreams.

Another time, what he’d heard might have spurred him on, made him resolve to change, kicked his ass into doing what needed to be done. But tonight, all it did was make him feel more depressed. And again, self-pity and self-loathing fought it out for the top spot of mental torture, part of him feeling the world was kicking him while he was down, part knowing he was doing this to himself. He had backed himself into a corner and was now crying about being trapped. He even thought Raven might have been right. That he was weak, that he’d be better off dead. It was a kind of thinking he couldn’t afford, but that wouldn’t make it stop.

Tonight, his only hope for change was still sitting on the couch cushion, and he wasn’t about to pick up the phone now. Any determination he’d had to do what Tai had told him had gone, and he was left feeling like he’d melted and stretched into something limp and boneless, spineless. His limbs even shook again as he sat back down on the couch, drink that might as well have been a lifeline in hand. He turned on the TV and increased the volume so he wouldn’t inadvertently hear any more difficult truths, blocking out his thoughts as best he could.


	26. Revenants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow struggles to deal with his memories of Summer's death on top of everything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! It feels like I've been away for weeks even though it's only been five days, so let's get back into this. There's a mention of Ruby's birthday in this chapter that seems mistimed, because her 'official' birthday is October 31st, but honestly, I refuse to believe Ruby Rose is a Scorpio. That girl is an Aquarius for sure. Hope you enjoy!

Monday passed in much the same way as Sunday, and Qrow was alone for even longer. He hadn’t woken up in time to see Ruby and Yang leave for school, and thus hadn’t had to look them in the eye while remembering their conversation about him. Their worry had been added onto his, churning in his chest like the rough grey waves of the ocean he could see out of the window. There was no wonder he had been sleeping badly.

At least his sleep had been light enough to prevent him really dreaming, because talking to Ozpin about the accident had not softened the sharp edges of his memories. With the anniversary tomorrow, the events were spinning around his head, accompanied by the old dull ache of grief. He ignored the memory of her for most of the day, but it finally got too much; she wasn’t right in his head. He went into his bedroom and pulled the box of photos from under the bed for the first time since September.

Slowly, he thumbed through them, images of Tai and Raven at twenty, a few of Tai and the kids, some just of Yang and Ruby, Yang’s first day at school. Then suddenly it was back to his own high school days, himself at seventeen, freshly moved out of his parents’ house and shaggy haired. Then one of Summer and Raven arm-wrestling over a cafeteria table, one of all four of them dressed up and ready for their senior prom, and Qrow remembered what a shit show that had been. And then there was a photo Qrow hadn’t looked at in years, from when he and Tai had just moved back from college and rented a tiny two-bedroom house in Patch.

_Summer and Raven had come over to visit as soon as they’d moved in, before they’d even unpacked their meagre possessions, and Summer had perched on the kitchen counter looking out of the window. Qrow had taken a quick candid photo of her, mostly to get on her nerves, and it had worked; she’d hopped down upon hearing the shutter and chased him around the house until they’d almost run into Tai carrying a box full of plates. She’d eventually just rolled her eyes and called him Birdbrain and gone to help Tai out._

But the photo showed her tranquil, watching something in the trees outside, her legs gently swinging in front of the cabinets. Her bangs were pinned back, her eyes wide and her face turned into the sunlight with a small smile. Qrow thought it _was_ her, in her essence. He’d even showed it to her and told her as much once he’d had it developed, and she’d given him a wry sort of smile and told him he was pretty good at this photography thing. He’d shaken off the compliment, but it had stuck with him. Once they’d moved into the big house after Raven left, he’d framed it and hung it on the landing.

But that time was long over, and he’d never see her like that again.

* * *

 

Tuesday, January sixteenth dawned appropriately dull and cold, the temperature near-freezing despite the thick grey clouds that hung over Vale. Qrow had barely slept, and had stopped trying at eight, in time to see Ruby and Yang off for school. He had spoken to them only minimally the night before, and he tried to put on a more cheerful mask this morning. But while both girls were as talkative as usual, they knew what today was; the looks they gave him were enough to be sure of that.

With them gone, he went back to his usual routine, drinking water and taking painkillers and picking at food he didn’t really want for his hangover; watching TV and reading and playing video games so he didn’t inadvertently think too much. His head felt very full, but almost empty at the same time, like all that was in there was TV static. Part of him was screaming at himself; he hadn’t even attempted to find another job since he’d been fired, apart from occasionally checking his email to find nothing but spam.

He just couldn’t bring himself to act, knowing that every moment he spent doing nothing was more time wasted and barely caring. This was as bad as he’d been in years. But today, of all days, searching for a job was the last thing on his mind. All pressing tasks, like talking to Ozpin or slowing down his drinking, seemed less important, but no more crucial duty had taken their place. So instead he sat, and read a book he’d read a hundred times before, and tried not to think about death.

Afternoon pulled in, and Qrow became restless, fidgeting in the certainty that there was something else he should be doing. Everything was building up, and soon the dam would burst; something would go wrong and it would be his fault, because what had he done to stop it? Reluctantly, he put down his book and picked up his phone. Tai had messaged him that morning, when he’d been too preoccupied to read it:

‘ _Hope you’re holding up okay. I had a hard day, I wish I could have visited her. I hope yours goes easier than mine. Call me when you feel up to it x_ ’

Qrow closed his eyes with a pained frown, then reread the text. Tai being on the other side of the world, and in such a different time zone that their days weren’t even the same, was clearly affecting them both. They usually spent this day together, or as much of it as they could, just to know they weren’t alone. But now they _were_ , each of them without adequate support on different continents, connected only by their similar pain.

His gaze alighted and stuck on the second sentence of the text.

‘ _I wish I could have visited her._ ’

Qrow’s mind cleared, and he had barely finished the thought before he was up from the couch. They rarely visited Summer’s grave on the anniversary of the accident; it didn’t seem right to only see her on the day she died. Usually they took the kids on her birthday, and on theirs, sometimes other special occasions too. Ruby would walk to see her alone pretty frequently once she was old enough, but of course, she couldn’t anymore. He’d been planning to take both girls to the grave on Ruby’s sixteenth; it was less than a month away. But he didn’t have to wait.

He hurriedly showered and got dressed, peering out of the window at the heavy sleet that was now pouring outside. He decided his windbreaker and scarf would be enough to keep him warm and dry over a sweater, and grabbed his wallet and keys. His hangover had done him a favour; he still hadn’t yet had a drink today. The want was starting to grow in him, but he would have to stave it off for now. He was not about to drive to Patch drunk.

* * *

 

He had to turn over the truck several times to get it to start, and grimaced as the gears made a grinding sound as he put it in reverse. The check engine light came on, but he ignored it. Now wasn’t the time. The truck paused again as he shifted into first and drove out of the parking lot, something it had been doing for a while. It had always been alright so far; it was muddling through just like him.

He stopped at the florist before he left town, anxiously checking his wallet. He couldn’t afford too much, not at the minute: Certainly he couldn’t afford the bouquets of pure white roses. It had been a long time since he’d bought anyone flowers; he hadn’t realised how expensive they were. But there were little winter bouquets, white roses and white poppies mixed with lots of little leafy things Qrow couldn’t name, and they were pretty enough, the kind of thing Summer would have loved for their imperfections. He bought one and laid the flowers out in the backseat of the truck, then continued on to Patch.

The drive was longer than usual, the heavy sleet spattering the windshield of the truck in combination with the twisting roads through the hills and forest making Qrow take his time. These roads were very familiar, and usually made him at least a little anxious, even on a clear dry day. But today, a sense of dead still calm had come over him; he felt he was doing the right thing for the first time in a couple of weeks.

He had half a mind to take the long way to the cemetery when he reached Patch, to see all the spots he knew, drive past the house that wasn’t really theirs anymore. He supposed it had never been his, but it had felt like home. Today, he decided he’d be better off not seeing it, and took the more direct route around the outskirts of the tiny town to the top of the hill where the gravestones overlooked the houses like impassive guardians.

He parked the truck in what passed for a parking lot, a little gravelled area at the side of the road that could fit maybe six cars at most. But there were no others here today, and no figures in the cemetery that he could see. It wasn’t surprising: He started shivering as soon as he stepped out into the elements, gasping as snow and freezing rain in combination hit his face. He had to bow over the flowers as he got them out to protect them from it, not that it mattered; they’d be staying here anyway.

There was no need to search for the headstone; he knew where it was, situated on the far end of one of the rows between the rotting fence and the black obelisk of its neighbour. Summer’s stone was simpler, white marble carved with her name, an emblem of a rose, and a few words from her favourite poem:

_Thus kindly I scatter._

Qrow just stood for a moment, looking at the grave but not really seeing it as he shivered violently, his hands already stiffening from the cold. He knew if she were here to see him she would chastise him for not wearing a better coat, not picking up gloves, standing here in such a downpour in the first place. But it would be loving, maternal, and she’d have grabbed his hand and dragged him back somewhere warm and made him coffee.

As the kids had grown she’d looked at him the same way as she’d looked at them; caring, exasperated affection.

Qrow bent to the little vase carved into the base of the headstone, and unwrapped the white flowers. He almost felt bad for them; they wouldn’t last out here if it stayed so cold. But then maybe in the next couple of days there’d be a frost, and all those green sprigs would get just as white as the flowers around them. That’d be appropriate, he thought. Winter encroaching even on that believed to be evergreen.

With the bouquet in its place, he crouched, placed one hand on the headstone, and sighed. “Hey, Summer.” He took a deep breath, embarrassed to be talking to no one. But with a glance around him, he remembered just how alone he was. “I know we don’t usually come see you on… this day. It’s been a while, though. I know the kids came to visit right before they came to Vale, but I haven’t been here since… Yang’s seventeenth, I guess. It’s been… well, it’s been an interesting few months.”

He straightened up and dropped his hand from the stone, taking a step back and shoving both hands into his pockets instead. It was starting to hurt when he flexed them.

“I don’t wanna babble on about _everything_ that’s happened, cause I’m sure Ruby and Yang will do that when I bring them back here in a couple weeks.” He got distracted for a moment, thinking about Ruby’s upcoming birthday. “God, can you believe she’ll be sixteen? I swear five minutes ago she was six. But you’d love the person she’s grown into. Yang too, they really… they really are you and Tai’s kids through and through.  
“Anyway, I… I did wanna tell you some stuff. You’d wanna know if you were here, so… Maybe you wanna know now. If you’re in a place where you can want anything.”

He glanced up at the iron grey of the clouds overhead, blinking as snow settled on his eyelashes, then quickly melted. “I’ve had a lot of trouble lately. I got attacked a few months ago, and… apparently I was pretty close to death. Got a good look at my own mortality. Not the first time, I guess, but hopefully the last until I’m old. Or my liver craps out.” He looked down at himself, hunching over, his shivering finally starting to wane. “And all I could think was that I couldn’t let Tai lose someone else. I couldn’t leave the girls alone. It was weird, until then, until I thought of them, I was almost ready. Ready to see you again, I guess.”

His voice cracked, but he continued. “I don’t even know if I would have seen you. Or if there’s anything to see, beyond this. For your sake I hope it’s not just… the hole in the ground you get stuck in for eternity.” His breath wavered. “Anyway, what with Tai being in China and me nearly dying and the kids having their own problems, it… I guess it worried him, because he’s been bad lately too. We fought over the holidays. He was mad with me, and I don’t blame him. I mean, I’m taking care of Ruby and Yang as best I can, but… I could be better.  
“It’s not like I’m not trying, but the main thing Tai was worried about is my drinking. And god knows I can’t just quit, not without risking my life all over again. But the girls have noticed that I’ve got a problem; hell, I told them as much. So I guess the question is, what’s more dangerous? Quitting or carrying on?”

He shook his head, looking down at his shoes, made muddy by his trek across the wet cemetery. “I _promised_ Tai I’d try to stop drinking. And I did, for about two days. And then everything went to shit, and I…” He clenched his hands into fists in his pockets. “No, it wasn’t anyone else’s fault. It was my decision. I broke and I never tried to fix myself. Cause I’m a quitter.  
“I got fired on Friday. So now I’m working against time trying to find another job, except I’m not, I’m just sitting around doing nothing all goddamn day, because…” He trailed off. “Well, because I’m fucked. People keep telling me I need to see a doctor and I’m starting to think they’re right.”

The sleet started to fall more heavily, and Qrow drew even further into himself, compressing his lungs in a way that almost forced a sob out of his throat. He didn’t know why he was saying what he was to Summer, or to the idea of her, to the memory of her. He didn’t even know if it was helping. He tried to think of something more positive, something that would have made her smile if she was here. Only one thing came to mind.

“I made this friend, back in September. I think you’d like him. His name’s Ozpin, he’s the principal at Beacon High now. He’s a nicer guy than Doctor Sere, you remember that old hag? Anyway, he… started coming to the bar, and we got talking. After I got hurt he helped me out, and Ruby and Yang too. He’s helped me talk through some stuff I needed to get off my chest. Even… even the accident.”

Qrow closed his eyes and remembered that disastrous evening at the Lookout, his own aggressive demeanour and miscommunication coming together in an ugly show. It made him want to sink into the mud and disappear just thinking about how cruel he’d been, spitting in the face of genuine kindness.

“We had a fight.” His voice was choked again. “I started and finished it. I guess I was looking for it, in a way. And I… I really feel like I fucked up. He makes me feel safe, and happy, or at least happier. And I tossed it back in his face, for some godforsaken reason. I don’t know why. And I don’t know what to do. Tai told me to apologise but I don’t think Oz wants to hear it. I mean, I don’t think _I_ would, if things were reversed, but… he’s more forgiving than me. Honestly, I just… I miss him.”

His eyes stung, and he began to cry. He tilted his head up, the tears that tracked down his face burning hot amongst the sleet.

“And I miss you, Summer. I think I loved you in every way it’s possible to love a person, you _and_ Tai. I keep wishing you were still here to talk some sense into me every now and then. But I guess you can’t fix everything.” He sniffed hard and wiped his eyes with his hand, though his face was so wet anyway it hardly mattered. “I keep… thinking of you like some kind of saviour, you know, like if you were here everything would be different and happy, but… You can’t change people’s natures. I’d still be the same jackass alcoholic as ever. The problems would just be different.”

All at once, Qrow ran out of things to say. The words had dried up as suddenly as they’d started, and it almost felt like he’d been jerked back to reality from a world where Summer was alive and well, and where he’d been talking at her rudely. He moved a little closer to the marble stone again.

“Sorry.” He said through the last of his tears. “I didn’t mean to… do that. Whatever that was.” He pulled his right hand out of his pocket, the fingers now mostly numb, and touched the top of the headstone again. “I love you. I’ll always miss you. But… you’re never far away, really. I’m always thinking of you. I know Tai and the girls are too.” He withdrew his hand and turned away, standing still with his back to the grave for a moment. “Goodbye, Summer.”

Stiff with cold, he walked away from her, eyes still sore and damp. At least walking back to the truck he was no longer facing into the wind, but he could feel the freezing rain flattening his hair with every step. He hurried to jump into the driver’s seat, and immediately turned on the heat, huddling in front of the vent and extending his hands towards it. He started shivering again with the change in temperature.

Once his hands had regained enough feeling, he pulled his phone out of his pocket, where it had thankfully been kept dry. Yang had texted him, and he grimaced when he noticed the time; she and Ruby would have gotten home twenty minutes ago.

‘ _Hey, where are you?_ ’

‘ **Just got caught up with something, I’ll be home in forty-five minutes.** ’ He replied, then added an afterthought: ‘ **There’s plenty of stuff in the freezer if you want dinner before I get back.** ’

He put his phone away and turned down the heating a little, then went to start the truck. It took a few tries again, and there was that check engine light almost seeming to stare at him. He pointedly ignored it, and went to put the truck in first, but couldn’t. He thought it was just stiff, maybe from the cold, but wiggling the stick made no difference, and no matter how much force he put behind it, the transmission wouldn’t move.

“No, no, no, come on.” Qrow muttered. “Come on!”

He gave it a final shove, only to hear a rough grinding sound and still be unable to get into first. He turned off the engine and took a deep breath to stop himself pounding on the steering wheel. His hands went to his head instead, tangling in his wet hair and pulling with frustration. For a moment he didn’t move, just stared out of the windshield with a sense of quiet panic building in his chest. He fought it down; this was no big deal. Cars broke down all the time.

The first thing he did was call his insurance company to see what tow business they recommended, then called the one whose number they gave him. The gruff voice on the other end told him it would be two hours before they could reach him. Qrow couldn’t restrain a groan, but accepted, and settled in for the wait. In the meantime, he texted Yang again to say he wouldn’t be home for a while and to definitely make dinner without him.

They continued to chat as he sat there, grateful for the warm air coming out of the vents, and Qrow watched his phone battery slowly drain by degrees, desperately hopeful that it would last at least until the tow truck arrived. He had been dragged mercilessly back to reality from whatever world he’d been living in where running off to see Summer alone was a good idea, on a day like today and in his current frame of mind. This was what he got: A bad decision adequately punished. There was a lot of time for him to stew on it.

He had been sitting there an hour and a quarter when the heating suddenly flicked off. Confused, he tried to turn it back on, but moving the dial did nothing. The check engine light had gone off, and now that he looked, so had the clock on the dash. He tried to turn the engine on again, but it simply spluttered and coughed until he turned the key back. Comprehension dawned.

“Fucking hell.” He growled.

He’d killed the battery, too; he supposed that was why the light had been on, because it had been waning for a while, and that was why it hadn’t been starting properly. His running the air for so long had just been the nail in the coffin. Whatever was wrong with the transmission would likely cost more, money that he couldn’t spare, but the battery was more of an insult; he should have noticed. He sighed deeply, and pulled his scarf tighter around his neck.

* * *

 

It was completely dark when the tow truck arrived, and Qrow was starting to shiver again in the driver’s seat as the air in his truck cooled down. He’d never been so glad to see someone as the stoic woman who handed him a stack of paperwork to read and fill out for his insurance company. She had to crank his truck onto the back of the flatbed, but then let him sit in the warm cab as she ratcheted it safely in place, getting into the driver’s seat drenched from the sleet still falling outside.

Qrow directed her to his mechanic back in Vale, and they sat in silence for the drive, made even slower by the huge heavy shape of the tow truck. It was seven thirty by the time they arrived, and it took a further fifteen minutes to get his truck off the flatbed and into a position where it could be taken into the shop. Qrow was just thankful they were still here; the place being open late was the main reason he frequented it.

He fiddled with his phone again as he sat in the waiting room, paperwork tucked under his leg in the chair as he watched the battery get down to twenty percent, fifteen, ten. It was half an hour before one of the mechanics came out to talk to him.

“Mr Branwen?” The man checked, wiping his hands down already dirty coveralls.

Qrow nodded and stood up to meet him.

The mechanic grimaced a little. “Well, unfortunately it’s not great news. I’m sure you realised you got a problem with your transmission, but we found it was even worse than it looked. Did you notice you had a transmission fluid leak?”

“No.” Qrow’s eyes widened. “Wait, how long has it been leaking?”

“A while. At least a few weeks. Long story short, the gears are so ground down they’re impossible to repair. The whole transmission should be replaced, and that’d set you back four thousand, maybe forty-five hundred dollars. And that alone is more than that truck’s worth.”

His heart sank. “You think it’s gonna be totalled?”

“Well, your battery also needs replacing, and the charging system needs repairs, plus all the bodywork issues you got going on… Yeah, it’s not good, pal. We’re gonna leave it be, you need to call your insurance company and get ‘em to come take a look, decide if they’re gonna pay out for it. In the meantime, we’re about ready to go home, and you look like you are too.”

“Yeah. I am. Well, thanks for… checking it out. How much do I owe you?”

“Nothing, your insurance should cover that. Just make sure you get on the phone to them pretty quick.”

“Right. Yeah, I’ll do that.”

Qrow called his insurance company as he walked home in what was now just cold rain, accepting everything they told him with a resigned sigh. They’d go and inspect the truck tomorrow, if they chose to total it they’d call to negotiate with him as soon as possible, he should have a pay-out within thirty days. The call took longer than the walk, and he paused in the parking lot of the apartment building, walking up and down the driveway still clutching the tow truck paperwork. As he passed his usual spot, he saw a dark stain of leaked transmission fluid that he’d never noticed before and silently cursed his lack of vigilance.

By the time he got off the phone, its battery was down to two percent, and he hurried up the stairs with a foul mist of anger, anxiety, and sobriety clouding his mind. He was starving, desperate for a drink, and soaked through. It felt like everything had been drained out of him. When he reached his apartment, he went straight to the kitchen and poured whiskey into a rocks glass just to avoid drinking it out of the bottle; he didn’t even add ice. He’d barely taken a sip when Ruby and Yang appeared in the doorway.

“Hey. Where have you been?” Yang asked.

“I told you, my truck broke down.” Qrow replied, leaning against the counter. “It’s done for.”

“That’s not what I meant. Where were you driving to?”

Qrow turned away and didn’t reply for a moment as he searched the cabinets for some quick meal he could eat; the piles of dirty dishes around told him Ruby and Yang had eaten already.

“Uncle Qrow?” Ruby said quietly. “We’re just worried.”

That made his stomach contract and his heart ache, and he looked over at them both now standing in the living area. “Yeah, I know. Just let me grab some food and get changed. Then I wanna talk to you both.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abrupt ending to this chapter because I had to split it in a weird place, you'll see why in the next chapter. Also everything about cars in this chapter is probably wrong, I don't know anything about cars. I tried.


	27. Coming in from the Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow has a series of difficult but necessary conversations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been so excited for this chapter to go up basically since I wrote it about two months ago. It's 6600 words and dialogue-heavy, so settle in and enjoy the ride!

When Qrow had eaten and put on some dry clothes, he returned the living room, where Ruby and Yang were sitting on the couch. They stopped whispering about something as he walked in, and watched as he silently fetched his abandoned drink from the kitchenette. He sat down in the armchair and sighed.

“I know I’ve not been great these last few days.” He began. “I heard you talking about me the other night.”

Ruby looked at him with wide eyes. “How?”

“The walls are thin, and I was quiet. But I heard about… how worried you are. And you were right to be. I fell off the horse and started drinking again. Honestly, even more than I was before.” He took a deep breath, forcing the words out. “And I’ve been miserable, and I know I’ve been useless to you two.”

“Is that why you disappeared today?” Yang asked.

Qrow nodded. “Yeah. I… I went to see your mom.” He directed the words at them both, and knew they understood. “Your dad wanted to be there, so I visited her for him. I just got a little caught up, that’s all.”

“And then your truck broke down.”

“Yeah. I wasn’t lying about that.”

Yang’s eyes were fixed on the glass in his hand, but she nodded.

“So, why do you need us?” Ruby asked.

“I just want you both to know that… I’m coming back from all this. I’m gonna pick myself up and try again, look for a new job, and talk to your dad about everything. I’m even gonna see if I can do anything about how I got fired. And yeah, I’m gonna work on my drinking. But like I told your dad, I can’t just stop. All of this is gonna take time, but that especially.”

“Well, what should we do to help?”

Qrow smiled sadly; that was Ruby all over, always ready to help out even when there was nothing she could really do. “You don’t need to do anything except be aware of what’s going on. You two just focus on school and your friends and let me deal with my problems. There’s no need to worry anymore.”

Yang snorted. “You know, just saying that doesn’t make it true. But you know what would make _me_ worry less? If you called Dad, tonight, to tell him what’s going on. Cause right now, we’re the only people who know, and that makes me feel kinda responsible.”

He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his free hand to his face. “Yeah, I get that. And I’m sorry I put you in that position, because you never deserved that. I’ll get your Dad to call me as soon as he’s free, he’ll still be at work right now. But… Listen, you’re not the only ones who know about this.”

“Who else does?” Ruby was giving him a sharp, astute look.

He sighed. “Ozpin… _Professor_ Ozpin knows. So look, whatever happens, you two are gonna be fine. You don’t have to feel responsible, and I wish you never had. But… I’m gonna be fine too. I just need time.”

She nodded. “I know you will.” She looked around at Yang, who got up from the couch and stood with her arms folded.

“I’m just… not sure.” Her lower lip trembled. “I mean, I _know_ you’re sick, Qrow. You’ve not been eating, or doing anything. It’s gonna take a lot more than not drinking and a new job for you to be fine.”

There was a moment of silence as he watched her fighting back tears, his own throat tight. Then he stood up and put down his drink on the table.

“You’re right.” He said quietly. “I’m… not well. If I knew you’d noticed, I’d have said something. I’m gonna… see a doctor, or whatever you’re meant to do. But first I’m gonna find out what the best first step is. We can’t waste money on doctors who can’t do anything for me.” He approached her and rested a hand on her shoulder. “Does that help?”

She nodded jerkily. “A little.” A tear ran down her face, and she hurriedly wiped it away, trying to turn her head so he couldn’t see.

He hugged her, and she buried her head in his shoulder, sniffling. Qrow held out his other arm. “Ruby?”

Ruby almost jumped at them, hugging Yang with one arm and Qrow with the other. “We’re _all_ gonna be okay. Right?”

“Yeah. I’m gonna make sure of that.”

They stood there for a few minutes, until Yang had stopped crying and started complaining she was too hot. She waved them both off and wiped her eyes, then adjusted her ponytail awkwardly.

“Sorry.” She still ducked her head, embarrassed.

“Don’t be.” Qrow picked up his drink and took a sip, then sat down again. “Let’s just take things one day at a time, okay? Hey, if nothing else, at least I’ve got a little more time for you two now.”

Yang half-smiled. “Yeah. Look, I’m gonna… go clean up. I bet my eyeliner’s all over my face.”

“It looks fine to me!” Ruby piped up as she turned away.

“I thought you wanted to talk to Uncle Qrow? Alone?” Yang prodded. “Remember?”

“Oh! Yeah. Okay.” Ruby turned to Qrow and smiled uneasily as Yang left the living room.

Qrow raised an eyebrow and watched as she took her seat on the couch again. “What’s this about?”

Ruby buried her face in her hands and groaned. “Ugh, this is so embarrassing! I told Yang and she wasn’t any help, and you’re the only adult around, so I guess this is your problem now too.”

He froze up for a moment, slightly worried as to what a teenage girl could be so ashamed to be asking about. “Uh… is this, you know… biological? Cause if it is-”

“No!” She looked up at him. “It’s… personal. And weird, but… I think you’ll understand even if you can’t help.”

He softened, and nodded. “Well, lay it on me, I’ll see what I can do.”

Ruby sighed. “You know what it’s like to have a crush, right?”

Qrow nodded, suppressing a grimace. He wasn’t sure if this was better or worse than an embarrassing medical problem. “Distantly, yeah.”

“And… You and Dad used to… be together.”

“Yeah. Where are you going with this?”

“Well, I just wondered how you’re meant to… deal with it. Having a crush on a close friend? Especially when they’re… the same sex.” She ducked her head, her face reddening.

“Oh.” Qrow’s eyes widened, and he took another large sip of his drink to stall while he desperately tried to think of something to say. His mind went back to Ozpin, a much more recent crush, but what good was it giving Ruby advice based on him? He’d never even been brave enough to make a move. “Well, it’s kinda complicated, I know. I mean, I say embrace it, but the world isn’t always that simple.”

Ruby nodded, and looked at him again. “You won't mind; I guess I’ll just tell you. I have a crush on Penny. We’re really really close and we talk all the time, but I don’t know if that means we should date! I mean, we don’t actually see each other face to face that often. And I don’t even know if she likes girls.”

“And you never will if you don’t ask, or she tells you for herself. You could be waiting forever for that.” He sighed. “It’s difficult, kid, and I’m not the best person to give you advice. I’m no good at relationships. For now, just… treat her with kindness, not just because you’ve got a crush on her, but because she’s your friend and you care about her. And if you decide you want to tell her, then tell her. But if she says no, or she’s not into girls, or she’s not into you, then you have to accept that. However hard it is.”

Ruby nodded. “Yeah, I know. It’s just really scary. What if she finds out I like girls and then hates me?”

“She won’t. I’d put cold hard cash on that.” He shook his head and smiled. “James raised that kid the exact opposite way his parents raised him. His parents were rich and stupid, and I think Tai and I were the first queer people he’d ever met. He’s made pretty damn sure Penny learns about different life experiences at a younger age than he did.”

“Oh. So you think she won’t mind?”

“I don’t think she’ll mind at all. I can’t say anything else about it for sure; that’s your path to walk. But Penny’s not gonna hate you for liking her.”

“Okay. That helps.” She smiled. “Thanks. I guess I’ve kind of been worrying too much.”

“With everything else going on, there’s no wonder. But I’m glad I could help. If you ever need to talk about anything else like that, let me know.”

She stood up. “I will.”

“Oh, and…” Qrow sighed and shook his head, feeling his own face getting red. “Do me a favour and stay safe, will you? I’m not gonna give you the Talk, I know your dad’s covered that, but… Don’t give me something else to worry about.”

Ruby snickered. “Gross. I’m way too young for that anyway.”

“If you say so.”

“Yeah. I’ll be fine.” She made to leave the room, but paused in the doorway. “Hey, remember to talk to Dad, won’t you?”

He nodded. “I will. Don’t worry.”

* * *

 

Qrow did as he’d promised, texting Tai to call him as soon as he got back from work. In the meantime, he busied himself with some chores, taking his wet clothes and a few other things down to the basement to be laundered. He picked up some of the garbage he’d left strewn around the living room and his bedroom over the last few days and polished the smears off the coffee table. Finally, he settled down, lying on the couch with the same book he’d been reading that afternoon.

He woke up at just past 1 am to the sound of his phone vibrating its way across the table. He jumped up, knocking the book that had been sitting dog-eared on his chest to the floor, and hurriedly cleared his throat in an effort to sound more awake before answering.

“Hey, Tai.” He had to restrain a yawn.

“Oh, uh… Sorry, did I wake you up?” Tai sounded confused.

“Yeah, don’t worry, I was waiting for you to call. Just passed out for a bit.” Qrow sat heavily on the couch again.

“Well, it sounded pretty urgent, what do you need to talk about? Or is it just about… yesterday?”

Qrow’s stomach turned and he took a deep breath. “It’s kinda about that too, but not entirely. Tai, I… I’ve not been honest with you.”

There was a long pause. “What do you mean?”

“When you last called, and I said work was going fine, and I was easing up on my drinking. I was lying.”

“ _What_? Well, what _has_ been going on, then?”

Qrow rubbed his eyes with his free hand. His heart was beating too fast. “I got fired, and I started drinking the same as before. Probably more than before.” He swallowed hard. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

The line went silent, the static all that told Qrow he was still connected. It seemed to last an age, fifteen seconds stretching out into eternity.

“Qrow.” Tai’s voice was quiet and strained. “I… I don’t understand. When did this happen?”

“When did I get fired? Friday. But I was already drinking again before that.”

“You need to tell me this whole story. Right now.”

“I know.” Qrow collected his thoughts like he was scraping roadkill off the street, memories that were half-missing and half-unwanted. He sighed. “I’ll make it brief. When I went back to work after the holidays, Salem had hired our most annoying customer to work behind the bar with me. Cinder, I’ve told you about her. I got in shit for yelling at her, found out I was already in shit with Salem but no one told me. Started drinking again to deal with the stress of putting up with it all.”

“Qrow-”

“Just let me finish.” He told the rest out of order. “Last Friday, the guy who stabbed me came back to the bar. I told him to leave, he wouldn’t go, we fought. Salem came out and fired me for not serving him and his friend.” He squeezed his eyes shut, remembering the sound of breaking glass. “I found out Salem was trying to get rid of me, and pretty much everyone else who works at the bar. She got this guy Hazel to bring Tyrian in to rile me up enough that she had reason to fire me. And chances are, she organised Tyrian attacking me in the first place.”

Tai was silent for a moment, but his breathing was audible. “She… paid him to try to kill you?” He paused, barely seeming to be able to understand the words. “Tell me you’re not just making this up, because… that’s crazy! That’s fucking… ridiculous!”

“I know. I know.” Qrow sighed. “I’m telling the truth. Cross my goddamn heart, Tai. But look, it’s not that bullshit that’s important here. I’m gonna deal with that once I find out how. I got fired. It was my fault.”

“How could it be your fault if it was a set up?”

“Because she set a trap by provoking me into anger, and I fell in it like a goddamn idiot.” He growled, knitting his fingers into his hair. “If I was a rational person, I’d have dealt with it calmly, and I’d still have a job.”

“But if she was looking for excuses to fire you, she’d have found another one.”

“Yeah, and maybe it would have given me time to find somewhere else to work.”

“So… you’ve been looking for another job?” Tai asked, not quite hopeful.

“Kinda. Not really.” Qrow corrected. “I’ve been kind of a wreck, to be honest with you. I’ve been… drunk a lot.”

“Why? Why go right back to it, why not something else?” Tai’s voice was irrational and desperate. “God, isn’t there… some other vice that won’t kill you as quickly or affect everyone around you?”

“Probably, but not one I’m addicted to.” His voice had a sharp edge he couldn’t control. “Tai, I’m just as mad about this as you are.”

“I’m not mad! I’m fucking upset, and disappointed, and… I’m sad for you, Qrow. You’re so much better than this, and I know for damn sure this is all a symptom of whatever the hell you’ve still got going on in your head. Let me guess, were you drunk when you got fired?”

Qrow set his jaw. “Yeah, kinda.”

“Kinda?”

“I’m not-”

“Wait, just… Look, just listen for a moment.” Tai’s voice softened. “Do you remember what I said the last time we talked?”

Qrow ran through bits of the conversation in his head. “Which part?”

“The part where I told you that slipping up doesn’t mean failure?”

“Oh. Yeah.”

“Yeah.” Tai repeated. “I can’t deny it, I _am_ disappointed, but… it’s hard. I don’t know exactly how you feel, and I probably never will. But I understand. And I know that if you pick yourself up, and keep trying, you’ll get there. Maybe you’ll slip again, but maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll just get a little further each time until the last time is forever. The point is, it’s not the drinking I’m super worried about.”

“You’re worried about the girls.”

“Well, yeah, for sure, but that’s not what I meant. We made a big deal out of honesty. You, me, _and_ Ruby and Yang. It’s kind of a kick in the teeth to be promised the truth and not given it.”

“I know, and I’m sorry. I know that’s meaningless.” Qrow grimaced. “I was just… scared you’d lose it. I was scared of what you’d say.”

Tai sighed. “I’m pretty sure I’ve already said my worst to you. But look, we’ve… we’ve been through worse than this. Both of us.”

“Not from opposite sides of the world.”

“Sure, but it’s not like I’m not here, is it? I’m always behind you, Qrow, and this doesn’t change that. That said, you’ve gotta be honest with me from now on. One hundred percent. And I have to say, it’s less about you, and more about Ruby and Yang. I need to know they’re safe. Did you tell them about this?”

“Yeah. I told them right away. But they’ve been worried.”

“I’m not surprised. But thanks for being honest with them, at least.”

There was another silence, and Qrow felt like there was a little air in his living room again. He hadn’t realised he was breathing so shallowly.

“Wait… were you lying about that fight with…” Tai trailed off.

“Ozpin? No.” Qrow gritted his teeth upon being reminded of the incident. It felt like forever ago. “No, that part was all true. He was trying to help me out after I got fired. I… wouldn’t let him.”

“That is… So you.” There was almost a joking tone in his voice, but it fell short of raising a smile. “And… You haven’t spoken to him yet, I’m guessing?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m terrified. And frankly, I’ve been a little busy wallowing in my misery for the last couple days.”

“What are you afraid of?”

“Well… Rejection, I guess.” Qrow shrugged for the benefit of no one.

“Right.” Tai sighed again. “Look, I can’t solve your problems for you. But you need to get on with solving them yourself. Even if step one is just applying for a couple more jobs, or texting Ozpin that you’re sorry, or… some little thing like that. Baby steps are still steps. You can go a long way one step at a time.”

“Yeah. I know I can, but it’s… it’s the first one that’s the hardest.”

“It is. You’re right. And nothing’s gonna make it not hard. But once you break that barrier, you’re gonna be impossible to stop.” A smile entered his voice. “And I _know_ you’ll get where you’re going, Qrow. I really believe in you.”

Qrow couldn’t help smiling back, looking down at his knees. “Thanks. I’ll remember that.”

“You should.” Tai’s voice changed pitch as he stretched, then let out a deep breath. “Maybe we should leave it here for now. Talk some more when we’re both a little… calmer.”

“Well, wait.” Qrow stumbled over his words for a second. “I went to see Summer today.”

“Oh. You did? You don’t usually go on the day.”

“No, but it had been a while, and your message reminded me. Made me wanna see her again.” He paused, remembering the white flowers and his breakdown that had somehow unclouded his mind. “I think it helped.”

“Well, that’s good. It does… kinda feel like she could still be here, doesn’t it? Talking to her like that.”

“Yeah. And I’m gonna take the kids on Ruby’s birthday, if they wanna go.”

“I’m sure they will.”

“Me too.” Qrow thought back to when he’d left the cemetery and almost laughed. “Oh yeah, and my truck broke down in Patch and it took me four hours to get home.”

“Oh my god, you’re fucking kidding me. Seriously?”

“Yep. Transmission’s fucked, battery died, and the charger’s bad. Insurance is probably gonna total it.”

“It is just not your week, is it?” Tai chuckled, but stopped abruptly. “Sorry. I know it’s not funny.”

“No, it’s not, but what else can you do but laugh? I’m pissed about it, but I got home in one piece, and I’m gonna get cash if the truck gets totalled. And at least I don’t have to pay for gas for a while.”

“Jeez, look at you. That’s pretty optimistic of you.”

“Yeah, well, with everything else going on, it almost feels like the universe is doing me a favour.”

“Let’s hope it’s got a few more in store for you.”

Qrow snorted. “Yeah, sure.”

They talked for a few more minutes, and Qrow gave Tai the details of his truck’s catastrophic failure. He couldn’t stop himself repeatedly yawning, though, and after a few more reminders to take care of himself and be honest, Tai told him to go to bed and hung up. Qrow didn’t really want to stop talking to Tai now that he’d started, but he was still happy to strip down and get into bed. There was so much left to do, to think about, to run through his mind, but if Tai and the kids weren’t mad, then the most important stuff was done. For now, he felt calm enough to sleep, and it didn’t take him long to drift off.

* * *

 

_The forest was dark, hot, and wet, the only light through the trees some sort of bioluminescence that shone golden in the blue night. A chorus of frogs and nocturnal birds calling filled the air. Qrow climbed his way through the foliage, thick vines that almost seemed to be alive for the way they moved against the trees. Perhaps some of them were snakes, but none bit him. The journey seemed easy._

_The sound of frogs grew louder, and he came to a clearing where a cloudy pond reflected a crescent moon high above. Beside the pond stood a cage, bigger on each side than Qrow was tall, lined with dead grass and hay. Inside, a white tiger languished, panting but otherwise still and silent. As he got closer, its eyes followed him. He undid the latch on the cage, and the tiger stood up, stretched like a domestic cat, and slowly crept out into the clearing. Its fur brushed his legs, and then it was off, disappearing silently into the undergrowth._

* * *

 

Qrow woke up slowly, his mind coherent but his body having other ideas. His eyes were dry, and it seemed much more comfortable to keep them closed, but he felt restless. He checked the time on his phone. It was not yet 8 am; he had time to see the kids off to school. The dream was hanging heavy in his head, though, and while he wasn’t sure it meant anything, he couldn’t get the image of the tiger out of his mind. It had been so knowing and sedate.

He sat up, ready to go and shower, but something stopped him standing. He looked at his phone on the bedside table again, and sighed.

_Baby steps_ , wasn’t that what Tai had said?

He picked up his phone, and dialled Ozpin’s number before he could hesitate any further. It rang, twice, three times, as he bit his lip, his heart rate increasing. He waited what seemed like forever, before the call finally went to voicemail. A robotic voice asked him to leave his name and message after the tone, and he drew a deep breath.

“Hey, Oz. It’s me, it’s Qrow. Uh…” He winced at the tremble in his voice. “Look, this might not be the best time, but… I wanna apologise to you. I said a lot of stupid shit to you on Saturday night when you were just trying to help. And I’ll understand if you’re still angry, but I’d like to talk things through with you, if you want. I’m… always available, so… Just please give me a call when you get this, or when you can. Even if it’s just to tell me not to call again. This isn’t really the place to go into detail, but… I mean, you were right. You always are. Anyway I… I’ll see you soon, I hope. I miss you.”

He ended the voicemail, screwing up his eyes and planting his palm heavily on his face. The message had been desperate enough without that little addition on the end. Not that it was a lie; just a truth he hadn’t wanted to tell. But he had done what he could for now. He took the phone into the bathroom with him as he showered, just in case Ozpin called back before the school day started, but it sat silent on the counter. He was preoccupied with it as he got dressed, too, overthinking every word of his message as he finally slipped the device into the pocket of his jeans so it would be nearby.

Ruby and Yang were calmer and more cheerful this morning, Yang gently teasing Ruby about her crush on Penny as she played with the red spinel in her pocket again. They asked how Taiyang had reacted to Qrow’s coming clean about his job, and he explained in brief terms. That he wasn’t mad, just disappointed. Both girls looked at each other and grimaced at that. He assured them that things were okay, and that with time they’d be back to normal. For the first time since Friday, he actually trusted those words.

He waved them off at the apartment door, and made himself a decent breakfast. It was refreshing not to have woken up hungover and still tired, but now that he had such energy, he had to direct it. He ate, then settled down at his PC with a black coffee and started his job search again. There had still been no word back from anywhere else he’d applied, so it was time for round two. With being tied down to Vale while his truck was out of commission, there were not many options for him, but a few more relevant listings had been added since his last check. He applied for them all, even the dive bar that he hated. There was no longer a chance to be picky.

The process was long and slow; he adapted his resume slightly for each application, and most then needed him to fill in a long form with repetitive information. It was dull, but he slogged through them, even reluctantly applying for a few kitchen jobs he didn’t really want. He was interrupted twice by calls from his insurance company: The first to tell him that his truck was indeed totalled, the second to say they’d be in touch to discuss his claim in in the next week. Qrow mostly just agreed with everything the reps said; the sooner he got paid out, the sooner he could get another car.

* * *

 

He didn’t eat lunch; he was absorbed enough with what he was doing that he forgot, and by the time he thought about it, it was nearly three. He had been feeling phantom vibrations from his phone in his pocket all day, taking it out to check for texts to find nothing. It was starting to stress him out, so he put it on the kitchen counter to charge where it wouldn’t bother him and got a snack and his first drink of the day. His focus was slipping anyway, but he just had two more tabs with applications in them open. If he could get through those, he could consider himself done for today.

He worked a little faster with his phone out of reach, and by four, he’d sent off both applications. He’d lowered his standards considerably, but he hoped that that would at least mean he got a call back, or just an email. It had been a while since he’d last had to search for jobs like this; he’d forgotten how disheartening it was to be simply ignored. But now he felt able to relax, even with the headache he had coming on from staring at the screen with his terrible posture all day.

The girls arrived home from school not long after, soaked through; Qrow hadn’t noticed it had started to rain again. They both went to change, and tried to come back to sit in the living room.

“No way.” He shook his head. “Take those wet clothes down and put them in the laundry, they’ll stink if you leave them in the hamper.”

“Ugh, but we’re _so_ tired.” Yang complained. “Can we not do it after dinner?”

“No, I’m not even making dinner yet. Go on, it takes ten minutes.”

They grumbled, but he heard them picking stuff up from their bedroom floor and grabbing keys. A moment later, the front door slammed shut. Qrow smirked and shook his head from the couch. They were definitely getting back to normal.

They hadn’t come back upstairs yet when Qrow’s phone started buzzing from the kitchen counter. He almost leapt up, and ripped out the charger to answer the call without checking the contact.

“Hello?” He said breathlessly.

“Hello.” Ozpin’s voice was quiet and a little cautious. “I just listened to the voicemail you left.”

Qrow exhaled heavily. “Yeah. Uh… What do you think? Or is this a ‘don’t call me again’ call?”

“No, it’s not that.” He said hurriedly. “I’d like to meet you, if that’s alright. This is probably better discussed face to face.”

“Yeah, agreed. When and where?”

“Now. Wherever is convenient.”

Surprised by Ozpin’s urgency, Qrow floundered. “Uh… Well, I don’t have a car anymore so I still can’t drive anywhere.”

Oz was momentarily side-tracked. “You… don’t have your car?”

“Yeah, it broke down, it’s fucked, long story.” He shook his head. “Could you come to the apartments again? Or should I walk to you?”

“I’ll come to you. Give me ten minutes to take Oscar home first.”

“Take your time. There’s no rush.”

Ozpin sighed. “Perhaps not.”

“Do what you need to do. I’m not going anywhere.”

“I won’t be too long.” He paused. “And… It’s nice to hear from you again.”

“Yeah.” Qrow smiled. “It’s nice to hear from you too.”

They wrapped up the call, and Qrow put on a jacket and shoes to go downstairs and wait for Ozpin outside. He picked up his keys and phone and headed for the door, just in time to catch Ruby and Yang coming in.

Ruby frowned at him, empty laundry basket under her arm. “Where are you going?”

“Uh… I have to go and meet someone.” Qrow said vaguely.

“Meet who?”

“Someone, just a friend.”

“Seriously?” Yang deadpanned.

“Yeah, seriously.” He squeezed between them through the door and turned back on the landing. “Look, I won’t be long, I’ve just gotta do this. I’ll start making dinner when I get back.”

He made his way downstairs, hearing Ruby and Yang both start talking at once before the apartment door closed. There was no need to hurry, but he did anyway, settling outside the main door to lean on the wall. He tapped his foot impatiently as he waited, checked his phone over and over, fidgeting. His stomach kept contracting unpleasantly. He hoped his hair looked alright.

He was using the front-facing camera on his phone as a mirror to flatten his bangs when the green sedan turned into the parking lot. Qrow turned off his phone and dropped it into his pocket as Ozpin pulled into a space and turned off the engine.

The evening sun that was struggling between the clouds seemed to shine off him as he got out of the car, clutching his cane in his right hand. He spotted Qrow right away; their eyes met across the tops of several cars. They approached each other slowly, meeting on the covered walkway in front of the building. There was a short silence.

“Hey.” Qrow said.

Ozpin smiled. “Hello. It’s good to see you.”

“Yeah. Thanks. I’m glad you don’t… hate me or anything.”

“Of course not.”

Qrow had a strong urge to embrace Ozpin, almost like a physical sensation, a magnetic pull. He fought it down, but only succeeded in making it weaker. It wouldn’t go away.

“So… about Saturday.” He finally continued.

“Yes.” Ozpin ducked his head a little. “I think we may both have acted foolishly.”

“Both?” Qrow frowned. “Oz, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I pushed you too hard and too far. I responded to your anger with anger of my own. And I’m sorry.”

“Oz.” There was the pull again, and Qrow grabbed Ozpin’s upper arms, held him gently but firmly until he looked him in the eye. “This wasn’t your fault. You made a mistake, and I insulted you. Those are not the same thing. I was a cruel asshole; I don’t blame you for lashing out.” He let go and stepped back. “If I were you I’d never forgive me. But I am sorry. I’m really sorry. I’d like to think I know better now.”

“I… thought you wouldn’t forgive _me_.” Ozpin leaned on his cane with both hands. “After I tried contacting you and you wouldn’t answer, I assumed that my worries were correct and I was in the wrong.”

“No. No, I was just…” Qrow sighed and looked at the ground. “I was ashamed. I knew I’d fucked up, and I thought… You were just checking on me. Out of duty. I didn’t think you’d actually want to hear from me. I kind of… fell to pieces over the last few days. You know, I didn’t realise how much I rely on you until didn’t think I could anymore.”

Ozpin smiled sadly, his expression conflicted. “Qrow, I’ve cared about you for a long time. The things you said while in a fragile state wouldn’t change that. But it isn’t healthy for you to lean on me like this, not for either of us.”

“I know. I know, I need to… Well, I need to do something, and I’d ask what, but I know, and you’ve said it enough times.”

“And I won’t say it again.”

“But I was wondering if you could help me out with a couple more things. Not right now, just sometime soon. Maybe you could help me find out what to do with this evidence I’ve got against Salem. And maybe you could help me find a good therapist and a doctor who can get me on the right medication.” Qrow took a deep breath. “Cause you were right, I need those things, but I… I don’t know where to start. If you would be willing to help me help myself, maybe we can go back to just being two people instead of a non-compliant patient and an out-of-practice counsellor.”

This time Ozpin’s smile was warm and kind. “Yes. I would be honoured to. And I’m glad you’ve… come around.”

“Well, a lot of people I trust have told me I need help; you were just the most adamant. The final straw was the kids.” Qrow sighed. “But hey, from rock bottom, the only way is up, right?”

“It is indeed. And you have great fortitude in you, Qrow. I don’t doubt that once you get the framework you need, you’ll get there quickly.”

He ducked his head, flattered. “Thanks. Tai said the same thing. I hope you’re both right.”

There was a short silence, and Qrow watched Ozpin’s hands as he swung his cane, his thin fingers shaking slightly, whether from the cold air or something else, he couldn’t tell. For a while, the only sound was the rain pattering on the awning above and dropping down to the asphalt below. Eventually, Ozpin planted the cane on the ground again, and Qrow looked up to meet his eye.

“Would you come to dinner on Friday night?” He asked hurriedly. “If I’m at home, we can go through some records together and I can hopefully help you with both your problems.”

Qrow was a little surprised, but nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, I would love to. When on Friday?”

“How about… five-thirty? That gives us time to talk before the meal. Would you like me to drive you?”

“Oh… No, I can walk. Well, depending how nearby you are.”

“It’s around two miles from here.”

“Ah, that’s fine.” Qrow waved a hand expressively. “I’ve dragged you down here enough times.”

“I don’t mind at all. But if you’re sure, I’ll give you the address.”

Qrow wrote down the address in the notes on his phone as Ozpin recited it, then nodded. “Thanks. I’ll be there.”

“Good.” Ozpin paused. “Do you have any allergies I should know about?”

“Nah.” Qrow chuckled. “But thanks for asking.”

“Alright. Well, then perhaps I should be on my way. We can talk in more depth on Friday. For now, I didn’t give Oscar the full picture of where I was going. I suspect he has questions.”

“Yeah, Ruby and Yang caught me on the way down here. They’re pretty suspicious too.”

“Then I’ll see you soon.” Ozpin smiled, and hesitated, but turned away.

Before Qrow really knew what he was doing, he’d reached out and taken hold of Ozpin’s right wrist. His cane dropped to the ground with a clatter, and for a moment there was silence. Ozpin looked around at him again, and Qrow hugged him, hard and sudden. Oz stumbled a little, but chuckled and wrapped his arms around him in return. They didn’t speak, and Qrow just listened to Ozpin’s breathing, gratified and comfortable, until they finally parted.

“Sorry.” He laughed, his face turning hot as he picked up the cane from the ground.

“You needn’t be. And thank you.” Ozpin took the cane with one hand and Qrow’s hand with the other. “I know it isn’t long, but… Take care.”

“Yeah, I will. You too.”

Oz squeezed his hand and let go, and this time when he turned away Qrow just watched, as he made his way through the rain and back to his car. He waited until he pulled out of the parking space, and waved from his shelter as Ozpin drove away. Then, still smiling and red-faced, he let himself back into the building.

When he reached the apartment, both Ruby and Yang were trying to look casual in the living room. Yang was sitting on the kitchen counter, Ruby in the armchair with one of Qrow’s books that she would never actually read. Qrow was immediately suspicious.

“What are you two doing?” He asked.

“Nothing!” Ruby said too quickly.

Yang sighed and shook her head. “Ruby, when I said act natural, this isn’t really what I meant.”

Ruby closed the book with a snap. “Well, I’m not very good with pressure!”

Yang turned to Qrow. “Were you just talking to Professor Ozpin?”

He quirked an eyebrow. “Maybe. Were you watching out the window?”

“Maybe!”

Qrow looked out of the window himself, and realised that Yang and Ruby would have clearly seen Ozpin get out of his car, and watched the majority of their conversation through the blurry filter of the transparent walkway awning. But from here, their embrace had probably looked even more intimate than it had actually been. He sighed and turned back to the room.

“Look, I told you, we’re friends. He knows about everything that’s happened lately. I’m going to his place for dinner on Friday.”

“Really?” Ruby piped up. “That’s cool! When Oscar talks about their house it always sounds really cosy.”

“So… you two are _just_ friends.” Yang pressed.

Qrow gritted his teeth in frustration. “Yeah. That’s all.” He shook his head. “Look, let’s find something for dinner. I bet you two are starving from all that spying.”

They grumbled again, but when Yang hopped down from the counter to help him search the refrigerator, Ruby quickly followed. The subject was changed, and Qrow fell behind in the conversation, still thinking about Ozpin. A little spark of hope was relit in his chest, and he let it grow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up: Next chapter is gonna mention stuff that happens in volume 6 of RWBY! If you're not up to date, I'd recommend watching at least the first THREE episodes of the volume, maybe the first four. I really don't want to unintentionally spoil anything for anyone.


	28. Candor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow visits Ozpin's house, and both learn a lot more about each other before dinner. Warnings: Mentions of abusive relationships, homophobia, child abuse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder that this chapter includes stuff from volume 6 episode 3 of RWBY! I really don't want anyone to get unknowingly spoiled, go watch it if you haven't! Also this chapter is filled to the brim with bizarre, mostly baseless Ozpin headcanons, and is nearly 8k words, and ends in a weird place because it had to end at some point. I got pretty carried away, but hopefully it's at least enjoyable!

Friday came, and Qrow found himself annoyingly attached to the full-length mirror in his bedroom, changing clothes and inspecting himself over and over again. Rationally, he knew that whatever clothes he showed up at Ozpin’s house in would be accepted equally graciously, but that wasn’t enough. He wanted to impress. Eventually, he settled on a grey plaid shirt and his best-fitting jeans, and hung his leather jacket in the hall to put on when he left.

Ruby and Yang wouldn’t be home until past five, so Qrow had made up a casserole and left it out to cool while he got ready. He went back to the kitchen and put it into the fridge for them to reheat when they wanted it. They knew where he was going, and he’d told them he didn’t know when he’d be back, so they wouldn’t wait up. He doubted he’d be gone longer than a few hours, but he wanted to cover his bases. The nerves building in the pit of his stomach were getting more urgent.

He filled his flask with whiskey and tucked it into his jacket pocket before he left; he hadn’t had a drink all day and he knew it wouldn’t be long before his hands started shaking. He’d never witnessed Ozpin drink, besides which, he wasn’t going to ask for alcohol as a guest. Better to be prepared and seem a little rude than not to be and get irritable. If he could be kind and helpful tonight, and from now on, maybe he could undo the damage done last weekend. Withdrawal symptoms were not going to expedite that process.

Finally, at just before five, Qrow set off, glad for his jacket in the cool, still evening air. The sun was setting, but he turned his back on it, walking uphill towards Beacon, and the quiet suburban neighbourhood that sprawled to its north. He’d searched Ozpin’s address once to find out what the area looked like, and searched it again now on his phone to get his own GPS location. The streets were long and twisting up here, and he’d never ventured into the area even when he was in high school; there had never been a reason to.

It took him a little longer than he’d anticipated to find the right house, and it was past five thirty when he saw it. As soon as he set eyes on it, though, he knew this was the one. The street was lined with single-storey houses, most of them with a little patch of manicured lawn, a concrete driveway, a white picket fence. This one had a small jungle in the front yard, evergreen shrubs and winter flowers all nestled together with barely a place to stand between them. It was unfenced, and a few of the bushes were escaping onto the pathway up to the door. And of course, the green sedan sat stately in the driveway.

Qrow made his way up to the front door and rang the bell, his stomach contracting with nerves as he waited. He pushed his shaking hands into his pockets, looking around at the exterior of the house. It was well cared-for, but in the wood of the doorframe, a strange shape had been carved and painted over. It looked like a candle, the wick aflame and sending out halos of light. He puzzled on it, but it wasn’t long before the door opened, and he looked down from where he’d expected to see Ozpin, meeting Oscar’s eye instead.

“Oh. Hey kid.” He said awkwardly.

“Uh… Hi.” Oscar stood aside and looked at the ground. “You’d better come in.”

Qrow nodded and followed him into the hall, closing the door behind him. “Thanks. Your dad around?”

“He’s gone down to the basement to fetch a few things. Uh… I guess you should come to the kitchen.”

They walked down the hallway, and into the second door on the right, from where a light was shining and a strong scent of cinnamon drifted. Oscar held the door open for him again, and Qrow stopped just over the threshold, staring around the room. The hallway had been dark and, from what Qrow could tell, sparsely decorated; the kitchen was almost overwhelming in contrast.

It was a bright, modern room, the countertops finished in dark wood and the floor tiled in golden-cream. The ceiling was very high, and in the spaces where there were no overhead cabinets, instead a narrow shelf ran around the edge of the room, even above the window. It was cluttered in a neat sort of way, jars of spices and other ingredients next to little decorative utensils, gold-edged teacups lined up next to what looked like a small fragment of ancient farm equipment, rusted but clean. A brass carriage clock shared its space with a figurine of some kind of seabird, dark wings spread and basking in the artificial glow from the spotlights overhead.

Qrow collected himself and walked further into the room. He leaned on the island, where Oscar attended to a saucepan on the stove at the opposite side. As he got closer he realised this was where the cinnamon smell was coming from. Oscar looked up at him suspiciously but didn’t speak. They had met several times over the months, but never exchanged more than a few words. And they’d certainly never spoken one on one.

Qrow cleared his throat. “What are you making?” He asked casually.

Oscar’s eyebrows shot up, and he stumbled over his words. “Uh, it’s just chai. You know, spiced tea?”

“Oh. Right.” He craned to see into the pan, which Oscar had stopped stirring. A milky foam was creeping up the sides as it boiled. “You’ve got, uh-” He pointed.

Oscar grimaced and stirred the chai, then turned off the flame beneath it. “Thanks.” He picked up the saucepan and turned to where a mug was waiting on the counter behind him. Carefully, he poured the mixture in, then paused on his way to deposit the pan in the sink. “Uh… Would you like some of this? I can make more, if you want?”

“No thanks, kid. I’m sure your dad will take care of me.”

The sound of a door opening and closing came from across the hall, and a moment later Ozpin walked into the kitchen, clutching a large paper sack in both arms. His eyes widened over the top of it upon seeing Qrow, and he put it down on the counter, brushing a shred of paper off his forest-green sweater.

“I’m so sorry, time must have gotten away from me. How are you?”

“I’m fine, thanks.” Qrow smiled and tried not to let it show how glad he was that Ozpin had arrived.

Oscar spoke before he could continue: “I’m going to finish my homework. When’s dinner again?”

“Around seven-thirty.” Ozpin replied. “And do your laundry if there’s time, please.”

“Ugh, I know.” Oscar sloped out of the room with his mug of chai in hand.

Ozpin turned back to Qrow and smiled warmly. “I’m glad Oscar let you in; I didn’t even hear the doorbell.”

“Yeah, me too. It’s getting cold out.” Qrow joked, and stepped forward a little. “So, what’s the plan?”

“Well, I thought we could have tea and discuss what we’re here to talk about, then perhaps you could help me make dessert? Once that’s done, we can relax a little.”

“Oh. Yeah, sure.” He paused, spotting a crockpot in the corner. “What are you making?”

“Lamb pilaf. Something I can leave mostly unattended while we talk.” Ozpin walked over and took the lid off the pot with a rush of steam, and picked up a nearby wooden spoon to stir it. “It’s getting along well. Let me show you to my office, then I’ll make the tea.” He replaced the lid and spoon, then rested a hand on Qrow’s back to guide him out of the room.

Qrow kept his mouth shut and followed, slightly apprehensive in his unfamiliar surroundings. It wasn’t that they were uncomfortable; more like they were so comfortable and lived in that as someone who didn’t know them, he felt he shouldn’t be there. But Oz, and even Oscar, had been welcoming. It was all just nerves, chewing at his guts again.

He was led across the hallway, and into another room that took his breath away as soon as the lights came on. Ozpin’s study was L-shaped, the far end hidden from the entrance, though as he walked further in, a large, glass-topped desk came into view there. Closer to the door, two low armchairs sat perpendicular to each other beside a coffee table, and in their view, a sideboard carried an array of trinkets below a display of Christian symbols on the wall. And the rest of the room was lined with bookshelves, tall narrow ones and short squat ones and one that took up most of the wall behind the desk. All filled with books of varying ages and states of repair, interrupted only occasionally with a small vase or a piece of art or photograph.

Before Qrow could say anything about it, Ozpin was talking again:

“Make yourself comfortable. Feel free to take a look around. Oh, would you like me to take your coat? I’ll hang it in the hall for you.”

“Oh. Yeah, thanks.” Qrow shed his jacket, plucked his flask out of the pocket, and handed it over.

Ozpin gave him a knowing look and sighed. “I won’t be long.”

With that, Qrow was left alone, and he placed his flask down on the low table and walked across the room to look out of the window. The way the houses were situated on the hill meant that the view was barely interrupted by the neighbours; he could see over the next roof and down over the streets to the north. He could distantly see the patch of woods that split the majority of Vale off from the rich suburb that James lived in. Then again, this clearly wasn’t a poor area in itself; Ozpin’s home was proof enough of that.

He turned away from the window and wandered back towards the door, staring at the bookshelves as he passed and spotting a few volumes he recognised and many hundreds that he didn’t. He’d always thought of himself as a pretty prolific reader, but clearly Oz could blow him out of the water. Secretly, he wondered when he ever had time to read, considering how busy his life was. Maybe he was just a collector.

Qrow stopped in front of the sideboard and inspected its contents. It was all arranged on a cloth, shamrock green with gold threading and tassels at the edges that wouldn’t have looked out of place worn by a wizard. There were rings, first and foremost, about thirty of them neatly and symmetrically aligned with the grid of gold. Some of them were clean and shining, others tarnished and dented. Most of them were chunky, brightly coloured: Costume jewellery at best and tacky at worst. He frowned in confusion at one that might once have had three glass gems, but now had only one. These didn’t seem like Ozpin’s kind of thing.

He was having to accept that he didn’t know as much about the man as he’d thought.

Ozpin came back to the study with a tea tray just as Qrow was reaching out to touch one of the other items between the rings: a small metal box with an enamelled design on the lid. There were two of them, one with a sun design, the other with the moon. He snatched his hand away from the sun like it had burned him and turned to smile as Ozpin put down the tray on the table, nudging his flask aside.

“Here. Take a seat.” Ozpin offered, smiling.

“Thanks.” Qrow sat down on Ozpin’s right, and watched him pour black tea out of a stainless steel teapot and into two floral-patterned cups. There was a little glass jug of milk on the tray, too, and a bowl of sugar cubes, and four small cookies arranged on a spare saucer. Qrow was oddly touched by the amount of effort that had gone into it, and caught his own smiling reflection in the liquid as he added a splash of milk and a sugar cube.

For a while the ringing of teaspoons on china was the only sound in the room as they each adjusted their tea to their liking. Qrow had never found himself completely speechless in front of Ozpin before, but here, it felt like the only way to be. The study reminded him of a library, and Oz the silent librarian, kind and patient as long as you didn’t cause trouble. And Qrow was good at causing trouble.

_It's all in your head_ , he thought, and shook himself.

He watched Ozpin put down his teaspoon and cleared his throat. “This place is really… Really nice.” He winced at his inelegance.

Oz just smiled. “Thank you. I’ve put a lot of work into it over the years. This room in particular.”

“It shows.” Qrow picked up a cookie and took a bite. It tasted like honey and was full of chocolate chips. He resisted the urge to talk with his mouth full. “So… Where do we start? Salem?”

“I think so.” Ozpin sighed. He put down his cup and saucer and stood up. “Wait here a moment.”

He walked across the room to the bookshelf behind the desk, from which he pulled a notebook. As he returned with it, Qrow could see that the spiral binding was twisted and broken, barely keeping the pages together. It was so stuffed with other pieces of paper that it was stuck open at a forty-five degree angle. Ozpin sat down and placed it on his lap, showing the cardboard cover decorated simply with ‘f.f.’ in scratchy cursive that wasn’t his.

“Everything I know about Salem, and all the evidence of her wrongdoing, is in here.” He took a deep breath, and ran a thumb over the lettering. “Qrow, I… I haven’t been entirely honest with you.”

Qrow inhaled sharply and frowned. “What do you mean?” His own lies were circling in his head, lies he’d told Tai. Lies he realised would hurt deeply from the other side.

“When I’ve spoken to you about Salem in the past, I’ve always told you I met her just as I was starting the non-profit. But I knew her for a long time before that.” He kept his gaze fixed on the notebook. “We were childhood friends. Attended the same church, lived on the same street here in Vale. She often spent time at home with me to avoid her overbearing father, and we bonded over our shared experiences. Worry about religion, feeling unwanted, the pressures of being an only child.  
“We grew apart in our early teenage years when she moved away, and met again in college. But things were different. We… Fell in love. It all happened very quickly. Our relationship lasted almost six years, and I thought I would marry her, until... Until this.”

Qrow was rendered speechless again, whatever reassurance he’d been wanting to give melting off his tongue. The words had been like a hammer through glass for his conviction, and he suddenly felt like the world had malfunctioned, that there had been some short-circuit and the connection was wrong, there was static on the line. He couldn’t have heard that right.

And then his frown dissolved, and he shook his head. “You dated. Does that matter?”

Ozpin looked up, his expression intense. “I don’t know. Does it?”

There was a moment’s silence, but Qrow broke it quickly. “Look, I don’t like being lied to. But I understand why you wouldn’t wanna be associated with her. And I understand why you’d tell me in particular that... That you were just acquaintances.” He paused, painful worry in his gut, thinking of the night he’d been fired, what pieces he could remember. The week that had passed felt like a century. “Although, there’s something I should ask you.”

“Go ahead.”

“Last Friday… When she was throwing me out of the bar, she said that… I shouldn’t trust you. Not in so many words, I guess. She said ‘If you’re willing to associate with Ozpin, you don’t know anything’, after I told her I knew what she was up to. Do you know what she meant?”

Oz stared into space as he answered, and for a moment he looked older, and tired. “We were very similar when we were together. Both full of ourselves, desperate to be known, to be recognised. We were the kind of friends, and later, partners, who competed over everything and nothing, each trying to outdo the other at every turn. It compelled us both to do well in our studies, but it also meant that everything we did was taken to its furthest extreme. From trying to make the most friends to causing the most trouble without getting caught. We should have known better.”

“Yeah. That sounds familiar.” Qrow thought of his twin sister and all the fight in her eyes.

“As time went on, I realised this was not a sustainable lifestyle, no matter how much I cared for her. Slowly, I stopped catering to her, refused to react when she’d make a bet or challenge me to something I knew would get me into trouble. We were too old for such foolishness, anyway. She began to resent me for doing what I felt like, instead of comparing myself to others, and most especially to her. Her challenges became taunts, her taunts became insults, her insults became… Personal. But I stayed with her because in a way, I thought she was right. I just wasn’t brave enough to take the risk or strong enough to perform.   
“When we started the non-profit, she was so keen to get on board. I truly believed she’d caught up, grown and changed. Realised what was important. But, of course, you know how that went.” He sighed.

“Yeah. I’m really sorry. You didn’t deserve that.” Qrow started to extend a hand to comfort Ozpin in some way, but changed his mind. “So… She thinks I shouldn’t trust you because… You didn’t do everything she asked you to? Because you had the audacity to have your own mind?”

“Salem is a narcissist.” Ozpin’s tone was clipped. “She thinks, consciously or not, that the world revolves around her. People who don’t bow to her whims are in her way, and she typically finds a way to dispatch them from her life, preferably in a way that entertains or otherwise benefits her. I witnessed her do so to several of our mutual friends when we were together, though I didn’t recognise it as such at the time. Eventually, I got in her way, and thus could no longer be trusted.”

“That’s why she was so eager to get involved with the non-profit.”

“Because it would get me out of her life in the cruellest way, and she would make a profit. Yes. I don’t believe she ever needed the money; her parents were well off and her day job paid well. It was the pain that the betrayal and breakup would cause that she wanted.” He paused and sighed. “That’s also why she had Tyrian attack you and then fired you. You were also, unfortunately, in her way. And I imagine your former co-workers are her next targets, which is why it’s important that we act.”

Ozpin sipped his tea, added a little more milk, then opened the notebook on his lap. There were dividers in it, buried amongst all the other loose paper, and he flicked to a purple one. The pages behind it were clearer than the others, each marked with a tight, neat grid filled with the same familiar cursive that was on the cover. Qrow noticed the edges of the pages were yellowing and crumpled with age.

“These are the shorthand versions of our cost and earnings reports.” Ozpin inclined the notebook towards Qrow and showed him a few pages, all very similar. “They were the initial notes Salem made before another member of the organisation wrote them up officially. Do you notice anything about them?” He handed over the book.

Qrow took it and looked more closely at the pages, flicking back and forth between the first and second, then the second and third. The handwriting was hard to decipher, but there was something, he could tell. Then, all at once, it hit him. “They’re all the same.”

Despite altered dates, some scribblings-out, and misaligned columns, every number on every report was the same. Every penny in, every penny out, identical, an impossibility.

Ozpin nodded solemnly. “No one ever thought to check. It was never the same person who wrote up the official reports each week. We all trusted that her numbers were correct and left her to them. And we paid for it dearly.” He took the notebook back, and his voice strengthened. “However, with this evidence, the personal information I have here, and what you found in the bar, I think we can do _something_. I’m just not sure what.”

Qrow sighed, unconsciously patting his pocket for his phone. He sat back and thought hard for a moment, sipping his tea. The right thing to do would be to go to the police, or the IRS, someone who could put a swift, legal stop to Salem’s activities. But would that really be enough? Qrow had lost what little faith he’d had in Vale Police Department after they’d failed to catch Tyrian, and he wasn’t truly sure the evidence they had could secure a conviction. The IRS was a safer bet, but they would just make Salem pay back what she owed. And while he didn’t consider himself cruel, he didn’t just want her to pay with money.

And he was sure she didn’t know as much as she thought she did.

“I’ve got an idea.” He sat up again and put his cup down on the table. “It’s stupid and it might get us in a lot of trouble, but I think it might work.”

Ozpin was eating a cookie, and frowned, but gestured for him to continue.

He got out his phone and navigated to the email he’d forwarded himself. “She’s done some stuff that’d land her in prison if it could be linked to her without doubt. The issue we’ve got is that maybe it can’t be. But I don’t think she knows how tenuous the connection is.” He stopped looking at the email and moved to the photos of the doctored register tallies. The handwriting was identical to that in Ozpin’s notebook. “If we just took her this stuff… Maybe with a few extra people and a threatening attitude… Maybe we could run her out of town.”

Silence fell for a moment, and Ozpin’s eyes went wide behind his glasses. “You’re right. That could get us into a _lot_ of trouble.”

“Yeah. But what else is there? The cops have proved they’re useless, and all anyone else is gonna do is fine her. We need her and her fucking people _out_ of this town, and out of our lives. I’m not suggesting violence, but… She’s already tried to have me killed once. If she’s that serious about getting rid of us, we need to be that serious about getting rid of her.”

Ozpin took a deep breath. “You’re right. And, admittedly, she’s threatened me in a similar way.”

“Wait, what? When was this?” Qrow was thrown off course for a moment, staring at Ozpin in concern.

“Many times, over the years. Most recently, when I was visiting the bar whilst you were recovering from the attack, back in September. There was only one day when An wasn’t there, and Salem was… less than flattering. She told me she knew why I kept coming back, who I was there for, and… made some unfortunately accurate inferences. She promised that she would tolerate me, but that I should watch my back. Thankfully, she hasn’t made a move yet, but that doesn’t mean she never will.”

Qrow’s mouth fell open. “God, Oz. Why didn’t you tell me? We could have done something earlier!”

“I didn’t want you to have to worry. At the time, it wasn’t your problem. Now, unfortunately, it is.”

“Yeah, well, even more reason for us not to deal with it anymore. I’ve had enough, and I know you have too.” He paused, calming himself; the mention of Salem threatening Oz had made him heatedly angry. “Let’s take some time to think on it. But we need a plan as soon as possible. I think we could get some people together, maybe even find some others she’s fucked over and see if they’ve got any evidence. She’s a coward under that confidence. You know that. We can beat her if we work together.”

Ozpin nodded, and a spark of something seemed to light up again in his eyes. “Yes. I think you’re right. It will take work, and courage. But there are more of us than there are of her.”

Qrow smiled at his resolve. “Right. So what now?”

“Right this minute, I think we’ll take a break.” Ozpin stood up again, notebook in one hand, half-empty tea in the other. “You still need a doctor and a therapist, and I’m getting rather sick of hearing Salem’s name for tonight. There’s always tomorrow; I don’t have anything else to do.”

Qrow nodded and drained his own tea, then followed him across the room to his desk, still smiling.

* * *

 

It took a while for Ozpin to find the records of the various doctors he’d seen in Vale; he clicked through files and websites and emails for a few minutes in silence, left elbow on the desk, running his thumb across his fingernails. Qrow hovered awkwardly, standing at his right and trying not to read anything he shouldn’t over his shoulder. After a while he satisfied himself with looking at Ozpin instead. In the yellowish artificial light, he looked warm, and his eyelashes cast shadows over a focused expression. Qrow realised with a jolt and a rush of blood to his face that he’d like to wake up next to him tomorrow, and had to avert his eyes.

Finally, Ozpin gave him the name of a doctor at the small local clinic, and a therapist at the hospital to whom the doctor would likely refer him if he asked. Qrow wrote down their details, then watched as Oz finished with his tea, and turned the cup upside-down on the saucer.

He made a frustrated sound. “I really must stop doing that.” He righted the cup again, revealing a small puddle of tea beneath it.

Qrow raised an eyebrow. “You make a habit of it?”

Ozpin smirked and shook his head. “I dabble in tea leaf reading. Turning over the cup is part of the process. I tend to forget myself and do it even when I’m not drinking loose leaf tea.” He pulled a tissue from the box on the desk and mopped a splash of tea off the surface.

Qrow looked at him curiously, then turned back to the display of Catholic artefacts on the wall. “Yeah, I noticed you’ve got some pretty spiritual stuff around. Are you… particularly religious?”

He sighed and stood up, leaving his cup on the desk, then walked past Qrow and across the room to stand in front of the sideboard. “Not anymore.” He said quietly.

Qrow followed and stood beside him, trying to get a read on his expression. His lips were tightly pursed; he looked a lot like he did whenever he saw Qrow drinking too much or when he snapped at him. He felt the same kind of quailing anguish he’d always felt then, even now it wasn’t directed at him.

“All of this belonged to my parents. Mostly my mother.” He gestured at the wall. A pewter crucifix hung at the top, with six hooks beneath: four bearing beaded rosaries, one of each in red, sapphire blue, deep green, and purple; two others held ancient devotional scapulars, dark and almost identical in design. “We were a Catholic family, as you might be able to tell.”

“Yeah. I kinda figured, from the rosary in your car.”

Ozpin nodded, eyes fixed on the crucifix.

“But you’re not practicing?” Qrow prodded.

“No. I haven’t been to church since I was eighteen.” He smiled a little. “I still remember my first visit home from college when my parents learned I didn’t attend church there. That I hadn’t truly believed in God since I was a child. It’s almost funny to look back on now. So much fuss over nothing.”

Qrow struggled to find anything to say; this wasn’t something he could relate to. But he could tell that it was a sensitive topic. “They weren’t happy about it?”

Ozpin chuckled. “No, not even remotely. I never really repaired my relationship with my father. He passed away before I graduated. Although I’m almost glad he never had to hear the kind of fights I had with my mother after he was gone.”

“Why, what kind of fights?”

The smile slipped from his face, and he turned to look at Qrow. “Not that I think this will surprise you, but… I’m attracted to both men and women. I came out to my mother after my father’s death. It… Didn’t go over well.” He swallowed hard.

Qrow touched his arm, his face falling. “Oz.” He couldn’t find anything to say; this, now, was too familiar.

“It was a long time ago.” Ozpin shook his head, looking down at Qrow’s hand resting on his forearm. “But yes, it was bad. It completely destroyed what relationship we had. It had been rocky for years, even before I stopped attending church. After this, she avoided speaking to me entirely if she could. Even as, for a while, we lived under the same roof. And when we did speak, the conversation always turned to how I was doomed to hell, and deserved to suffer. For a while, I started to believe it.”

“But you know that’s not true now, right?”

“I know. I do know.” He pulled away and stepped forward to pick up one of the rings from the sideboard. It glinted in the light as he turned it around, three possibly-real amethysts sparkling between six certainly-fake diamonds. “These were all hers. There are a few other things, too, a pair of brooches and a necklace or two, but it was mostly rings. She was never without one. They were all she left me in her will when she died. There was a very forthright comment on my sexuality and manliness accompanying it. This was her revenge, I suppose.”

Something like pity touched with anger flared in Qrow’s chest like blue fire. He got closer again, looking over Ozpin’s shoulder. “So… Why keep them? I mean, no offence, but… Most of them are junk anyway.” He picked up the ring with the missing stones and presented it to Ozpin in his palm. “Why not get rid of them? Stop thinking about it?”

Ozpin took the broken ring with something that didn’t quite make it to a laugh. “I don’t know.” He admitted. “The human mind is a complicated, ridiculous thing. Some days, seeing it all makes me feel worse. Other days, it makes me feel better.” He put both rings carefully back in their places. “I grew up in this house. It was left to an uncle, who left it to me when he died two years after my mother. For a long time I left everything as it was; my uncle never lived in the house, so it looked the same as it had when my mother had lived here. But over time, I changed what needed to be changed, and I pared back on my mother’s things. And what was left, I brought mostly into one room, so that if I want to see them, I have to _go_ and see them.”

“Right. Did that help?”

“It helped.” He smiled, and shook his head. “Grief is a strange emotion. It leaves a wound, and sometimes even years later, it feels fresh. But truly, that scar tissue is stronger than it was before. To me, at least, remembering when I _want_ to remember helps the wounds to heal.”

Qrow nodded slowly. “Yeah. I think I get that. It’s like… Sometimes you have to let it hurt in the foreground, so it doesn’t just become the backdrop to your whole life.”

“Something that that, yes.”

He looked down at the rings again, and at the strange enamelled boxes in between. He pointed at the one decorated with the sun again. “If you don’t mind me asking… What are these? Were they your mom’s, too?”

Ozpin picked it up and opened the hinged lid, with some effort; the metal squeaked against itself. “They were. They’re tarot cards.” He inclined the box so that Qrow could see the mystical design on the backs of the cards, wands and swords cross-hatched around a repeating pattern of cups and coins. “I found them hidden in my mother’s closet when I moved back in. She had denounced them as Satanic, but that clearly never stopped her having them. I became curious and started using them myself.” He smiled again. “Truth be told, this kind of thing- The cards, tea leaf reading, astrology- It all became a sort of surrogate for my missing religion.”

“Really?” Qrow gently took the card box from Ozpin’s unresisting hands and turned over the top card. It showed a man hanging from a tree, upside down by one ankle with legs crossed. A halo shone around his head. “In what way?”

“Ritual. To me, religion brought comfort even when I was questioning the existence of a higher power, because of the process. Going to church, saying prayers you know, singing hymns you know; people crave that kind of familiarity. And the process of reading cards or tea leaves, the ritual, gives me the same feeling of calm.” He paused, tilting his head. “I suppose it’s similar to any other routine, just a little more obscure.”

“Yeah. I guess so.” Qrow turned over The Hanged Man and closed the box on it, replacing it carefully where Ozpin had taken it from.

“Are you alright? You’ve been a little quiet. I’m sorry if I’ve been talking about myself too much.”

“No, no, not at all.” He placated hurriedly. “It’s just, uh… Well, some of this hit pretty close to home. The stuff about your mom, I mean.”

“Oh. Would you like to talk about it?”

Qrow considered for a moment, but no apprehension arose. He nodded. “Yeah. I think so.” He turned away and sat back down in the armchair he’d been in before. His hands were starting to shake, but he twined his fingers together and ignored them.

Ozpin sat down again at his side, silent, just watching him as he collected his thoughts.

“I never had a good relationship with my parents. I guess neither of us did, really, Raven and I were both…” He trailed off, losing his train of thought. “Sorry, it’s all… confused in my head.”

“Take your time.” Ozpin said softly.

Qrow nodded and paused for a moment, following the tangled trails back to what he was trying to say. “I guess I’d better start from the beginning. The very beginning.” He took a breath and let it out in a frustrated sigh for a story he hadn’t told in years. “My parents were alcoholics, drug addicts, and gamblers before Raven and I were born. They didn’t want kids, they wanted to have their reckless lifestyle and die young. I can respect that, but they weren’t careful enough. When my mom found out she was pregnant, they tried to clean up their act a bit; she stopped drinking, got her shit together the way you’d expect. My dad got a better job so he could support us.”

“It sounds like they did the right thing.”

“Yeah, for a while. The thing is, they were only expecting one kid. Ultrasound technology wasn’t quite what it is now. Doctors told them they were having a girl, and they went away satisfied that they would get one strong, healthy kid. You can imagine their surprise when they got one strong, healthy daughter and one weak, feeble son. Not uncommon, apparently, where one twin takes most of the nutrients and the other suffers. Well, my parents weren’t patient people, and they didn’t want two kids, and they didn’t want a son, and they _really_ didn’t want a son who was sick. But they tried.  
“Things were pretty much okay until we were about three, four years old. Then they started getting back into drinking in a heavy way, now we didn’t need as much supervision. And with the drinking came violence. There’s not much point going into it, you know the deal. I’m sure you’ve dealt with kids at school who come from that kind of household. Terrified and intimidated into keeping quiet about it until someone eventually sees the bruises.”

Ozpin’s hand touched Qrow’s entwined fingers. Neither of them reacted aloud, but Qrow relaxed slightly, taking Ozpin’s hand in his left and letting the right drop into his lap. He found it easier to continue like that.

“They used to pit us against each other whenever they could, every opportunity. I was always a little smaller than Raven until we were teenagers, and there was this constant competition forced on us. Who can carry the most groceries, who can reach the highest shelf, who can do the most to clean the house in one day. The winner got the satisfaction of knowing they were stronger, and the loser got punished. I always lost.  
“When we started fighting between ourselves, first we got the hell beaten out of us. When that didn’t stop us, they started… They called it ‘making it official’. They’d make us box in the backyard, with hand wraps and mouth guards and everything. Mom as the audience, Dad as the referee. Until I hit puberty, it was a fucking wash. Every goddamn week, sometimes twice a week, Raven got to beat the shit out of me with no punishment, because it was ‘official’.” Bitterness flooded his voice.

Ozpin’s thumb rubbed gently over his knuckles, and he continued.

“We moved to Vale the summer before we started high school. Or rather, we moved to the middle of nowhere out in the woods near Vale. Far away from any neighbours like always, so no one heard all the yelling. We boxed one night at the end of summer and I broke Raven’s nose, and broke my finger at the same time, and from then on we were kind of even. We started settling our fights with words so that they wouldn’t drag us outside to hit each other anymore. We were… sort of a united front, for a while.”

Qrow paused and swallowed, finally looking up from where he’d been staring at Ozpin’s hand in his to look him in the eye. His expression was worried, his eyes intense gold in the yellow light. Qrow tried to half-smile reassuringly, to say he was fine, but it felt more like a grimace.

“This is the part that you reminded me of.” He continued quietly. “I came out to Raven when I was sixteen. She must have let it slip to our mom, whether deliberately or not, I don’t know. She’d hit me with a belt before, but this time… This time she left scars. It took weeks to heal, and Raven was the one who held me down. She apologised, but… there’s really no coming back from that. And from then on my mom called me… just the worst things you can think of, every time we spoke. I lasted another four months in the house before I moved out.”

“Did you tell anyone?” Ozpin asked quietly. His grip had tightened on Qrow’s hand.

He shook his head. “Not for a while. Eventually I told Summer, and then Tai after I’d moved out, cause for the first couple months his family took me in. But I never told anyone at the school. Once…” He frowned and gritted his teeth, an echo of ancient anger coming up to meet him. “Once I was changing for gym and another kid saw some of my scars and yelled about it to everyone who’d listen. I got sent to a counsellor, and instead of trying to help, they told me to keep that stuff covered. To sit out of gym if necessary. No questions about how they got there.”

Ozpin shook his head. “Completely unforgivable.”

“Times have changed. Back then, image was everything. I’m glad things aren’t like that at Beacon now.”

“We do our best. No one should have to suffer like that.”

“No. They shouldn’t.” He sighed.

“Did Raven move out of the house with you?”

“Nah, she stayed. That was another wedge in our relationship, really. She knew why I left; she’d been on the receiving end herself enough times. But she was always the golden child, and she was willing to put up with things being really bad occasionally for consistent comfort and shelter. Or maybe it was some weird Stockholm syndrome thing. I don’t know. I asked her if she wanted to share a place, but she said no without even thinking about it. I can’t really blame her; we were barely seventeen.”

“What did you do?”

“Found a job while I was staying with Tai, evening shifts four days a week and every Saturday at the diner that used to be out on the road to Patch. Once I’d saved up a little, I started renting a room in a shared house. Eight by ten feet, five to a bathroom, and a kitchen with no stove: That’s where I lived my life until I graduated high school, and I only just graduated. It was miserable. I’d never have gotten through those two years if it hadn’t been for Tai and Summer, and I guess Raven as well. But I did get through it.”

There was a long silence, and Ozpin’s hand grew still in Qrow’s. They looked at one another for a moment, and Qrow tried the reassuring smile again. This time he felt like it almost came out right, and it was odd; he did feel a little off-balance, but telling the story hadn’t hurt the way talking about the accident had.

“I’m sorry for making you relive that.” Ozpin said mournfully.

“Don’t apologise.” Qrow replied, shaking his head. “I don’t feel bad. It was a long time ago, and… Sometimes you need to get that stuff out.”

He nodded slowly. “I didn’t have this in mind for this evening.”

Qrow snorted. “Me neither. But you had to find out sometime. And I don’t grieve for my parents, or my sister. Like you said: There’s better people to call family.” He paused, studying Ozpin’s expression. “And the same goes for you.”

“Yes.” He took a deep breath. “You know, Qrow, looking at you is a little like looking in a mirror and seeing… someone I could have been, if my life had gone a different way.”

“If it had gone worse, you mean.”

“That’s not what I said.” A hint of an exasperated smile curved Ozpin’s lips. “But I suppose now I understand why.”

“It sounds like we both got in a lot of trouble.” Qrow teased. “Sounds like you didn’t really deserve any of yours, though.”

“Well, to say nothing of my college career, perhaps.” His smirk faded. “But truly, no one deserves abuse. Neither of us did. It’s cruel that we share that trauma.”

“Fuck ‘em.” Qrow said with relish. “I haven’t seen my parents in over twenty years, and you know what? I don’t care if they’re dead, I don’t care where they are, and I don’t care to think about them.” His voice lowered and flattened a little. “Yeah, sometimes stuff comes back when you don’t want it to. But like you said, remembering when you want to remember, that’s great. Cause if you don’t want to, one day you can just… pack everything up. Move on.”

Ozpin smiled again, more genuinely. “I do love the way you look at the world. Your optimism comes out in the strangest places.”

Qrow shrugged. “I do what I can.” He squeezed Ozpin’s hand, and for a moment there was silence, and they looked at one another deeply.

Ozpin gently pulled his hand away and stood up. “I think we had better get started with dessert. It needs some time in the oven.”

“Oh, alright. What are we making?” Qrow got up with him, and walked across the room to fetch Ozpin’s discarded cup from the desk.

“Apple and pear crumble. All home-grown.”

“Fancy. You’re really pulling out all the stops.”

“It’s not as complicated as it sounds.”

Qrow put down the cup and saucer on the tray, and grabbed Ozpin’s arm as he bent to pick it up. He straightened up, and there was a moment of silence.

“Oz, you keep looking at me like I’m on my deathbed. I’m fine.”

Ozpin blinked. “I’m sorry. I’m just a little worried. Are you sure you’re alright?”

Qrow moved closer and hugged him, speaking into his shoulder. “Maybe not in the long term. But here and now, I’m fine. I’m great.”

“Good.” He pressed his face close to Qrow’s, and for a moment they were still under the judging gaze of the crucifix.

When they finally separated, Qrow had the urge to act further, but Ozpin had picked up the tea tray in both hands before he could do anything. His face was very red.

“Let’s go back to the kitchen.”

Qrow grabbed his flask and followed him out of the office, smirking to himself as he turned off the lights.


	29. The Hanged Man and the Fool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow helps Ozpin with dinner, and they finally get down to the real reason they're here. Warning: brief mentions of self-harm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another possibly excessively-long chapter! Lots of food description, a little bit of bluffing about wine, and even more mostly baseless headcanons. Enjoy!

The kitchen was quiet apart from the sounds of a knife through pear flesh, a wooden spoon against a glass mixing bowl. Qrow was chopping apples and pears into tiny cubes and depositing them into a baking dish, while Ozpin mixed oats and flour with butter and sugar to make crumble topping. The pears were sweet, the apples slightly tart; Qrow had sneaked a piece of each to try. He kept feeling Ozpin’s gaze on the back of his neck, but he would never be looking when he turned. It almost felt like a game. He was getting warm as the oven preheated nearby.

They put the crumble together, the fruit mixed with brown sugar and plenty of cinnamon, then covered with the crumbs and sprinkled with toasted flaked almonds. It went into the oven, and they cleaned up. Ozpin led Qrow to the backyard to compost the skins and cores of the fruit, through a mud room where boots and coats were neatly kept. The garden was almost as jungle-like as the front yard, lined up with the now-bare apple and pear trees, rhubarb and what looked like beets growing in the ground between more evergreens and hellebores. Before Qrow picked his way around to the compost bin at the end of the path he thought about how pretty everything looked, even in the dark.

He came back inside and washed his hands, and Ozpin took him through to the living room to sit down.

“We have some time to kill before everything’s ready.” He said.

The living room, much like the study, was filled with books, shelves almost overflowing, some bowing with the weight of the volumes on them. A large picture window showed a similar view to that from the study, and a window seat scattered with cushions seemed to fashion as a reading nook. There was an upright piano in the far corner, and next to it a grandfather clock that ticked with a sound like a falling tree, golden pendulum swinging sedately back and forth. The floor was dark hardwood, and their footsteps were loud as Ozpin walked him over to the couch to sit down.

“Well, this place is certainly cosy.” Qrow commented. “How much of this did you do?”

Ozpin turned in his seat to face Qrow and to gesture around as he spoke. “Almost everything, in this room. The only things I kept were the bookcase by the window, the clock, and the piano.”

Qrow nodded, his gaze drawn down from a collection of framed photographs on the wall and back to the piano. “Do you play?” He asked.

“I don’t; it was my father’s. Oscar has been learning, though. I’m just glad to see it getting some use.”

He nodded again, not knowing what to say. Pianos and religion and enough books to sink a boat; Qrow didn’t know about any of that stuff. The first time he’d ever seen a piano outside of TV was when he’d started Beacon and there’d been a baby grand in the music department. He wondered idly if it was still there, and found his hands moving almost automatically, unscrewing the top of his flask.

“Qrow?” Ozpin said cautiously.

He surfaced and looked up into worried eyes. “Yeah?”

“Can you wait until dinner?” Ozpin gestured at his flask. “We’ll be having wine. I… assumed you would need something.”

Qrow slumped a little, ashamed. “Yeah. Sorry.” He screwed the lid back onto his flask and put it down on the coffee table.

“You don’t need to apologise. I know it’s hard. But one day at a time. The fact you can wait is a good sign.”

“I know. It could be worse.” He shrugged. “Knowing that doesn’t make it feel better, though.”

“No. But you’ll find no judgement here. I can’t claim to know exactly what you’re going through, but I do understand. And I’m always behind you.”

Warmth spread through Qrow, and he found that he’d known that, deep down. That this place, and this person, were safe. He smiled. “Thanks.” A burst of courage seized him. “There’s no one else I’d rather have on my side.”

Ozpin just smiled back, his cheeks flushing pink again.

* * *

 

They talked, directionless and non-serious, for twenty minutes or so, then returned to the kitchen to check how the food was doing. Ozpin added something to the crock pot and stirred it, while Qrow checked that the crumble wasn’t burning. He grabbed an oven mitt to move it down a shelf, and turned to see Ozpin pulling carrots out of the fridge. He just watched for a moment as he set about peeling them, not sure if there was any point offering his help.

At that moment, Oscar walked in, holding his mug from earlier. His expression changed upon seeing Qrow standing there doing nothing, becoming a little wary and skittish. Silently, he walked around Ozpin to place his mug in the sink, then stood on his toes to see what he was doing.

Ozpin didn’t look up as he spoke. “Did you do your laundry?”

“I put it on.” Oscar replied wearily. “Is this for dinner?”

“Well, I’m not going to feed it to the birds, now am I?” Ozpin smirked, and got out a grater from the cabinet at his left. “While you’re here, could you set the table?”

“Sure.” Oscar walked across the room, to glass-panelled double doors that led into the dining room. He paused, looked quizzically at Qrow, then asked: “Wine glasses?”

“Yes, please. And napkins.”

Oscar nodded and left the room, but left the doors open behind him in what looked like a deliberate gesture.

The rest of the meal set up was easy, and Ozpin put Qrow back to work dressing the carrot salad according to the recipe as he found the wine and popped the cork to let it air a little. He turned off the oven and laid the crumble on the very bottom to stay warm, then took the dish out of the crockpot to lay it on the dining table. Qrow quickly stirred the vinaigrette into the carrots and transferred them into the serving dish Ozpin had given him, and followed him through to the dining room. Oscar was already sitting down, folding a stiff linen napkin into a misshapen boat.

Ozpin, who had been looking a little harried, went back for the wine, and came back carrying two bottles, seeming calmer. He’d taken his glasses off at some point; Qrow hadn’t noticed, but now he’d brushed his hair out of his eyes and they were shining with something that made them hard to look away from.

“Take a seat.” He said.

Qrow nodded and sat down opposite Oscar at the right of the table.

Ozpin poured dark red wine into two of the glasses, then put down the bottle and poured from the other one into Oscar’s glass.

“What is that?” Oscar asked, picking it up and inspecting it. The liquid was greenish-white, the colour of lemonade, but clearer.

“Elderflower cordial. It’s the closest you’re going to get to wine for a while.”

Oscar snorted, then sipped it and shrugged.

Finally, Ozpin sat down at the head of the table and spread his hands. “Help yourselves.”

Oscar went for the carrots first, so Qrow grabbed the large serving spoon and ladled a portion of lamb pilaf onto his plate. It smelled incredible, rich and savoury with an edge of the almonds that were sprinkled in. They swapped utensils over the table, and now he used the tongs to grab some carrot salad. It suddenly struck him how hungry he was.

Ozpin didn’t start serving himself until both Qrow and Oscar had filled their plates. Oscar started eating right away, but Qrow waited for Ozpin to set down his plate again, sipping his wine in the meantime. The label on the bottle declared it to be a Cabernet-Merlot blend, which didn’t mean much to Qrow. It tasted a little sweet, and a little bitter, with a sort of coffee-ish aftertaste. He’d never been a big wine drinker.

Ozpin put down his plate and picked up a fork, and Qrow copied. They began to eat, and there was silence again; this time not the silence of nervousness or having nothing to say, but the silence of other priorities. Forks scraped against plates, and Qrow’s rings resonated against his wine glass once or twice. Finally, Oscar spoke again.

“A little too much vinegar on the carrots.” He commented casually.

“Oscar.” Ozpin admonished gently.

Qrow frowned. “Really?” He tried another mouthful. They were perhaps a little too tangy; he hadn’t measured out the vinaigrette ingredients thoroughly. “Oh. Yeah, I see it. Sorry.”

Oscar’s face had turned very red. “Uh… You did those?”

“Yeah.” He laughed.

“Oh. Sorry. They’re not bad! Just… different?” He grimaced and looked at his plate.

“Open mouth, insert foot.” Ozpin muttered.

“Dad, shut up.”

It wasn’t long before their plates were cleared; Oscar had taken a small second helping of lamb, but had not finished his carrots. Ozpin offered Qrow seconds, but he declined. He’d seen the size of the crumble waiting in the oven and he didn’t want to feel sickeningly full by the end of the night. The thought of _the end of the night_ made his face redden, and he was glad when Ozpin and Oscar collected the plates and dishes and they both left for the kitchen. He finished his wine while they were gone, then wondered if it would be rude to pour himself another glass.

He didn’t have time to think on it long before Oscar had returned with three bowls and a tub of good quality vanilla ice cream, the kind with the black specks of vanilla in it. Ozpin wasn’t far behind, carrying the crumble in oven-mitted hands. They placed both down at the head of the table, and Ozpin started dividing the crumble into rough portions.

“Guests first.” He said. “Would you like ice cream?”

“Absolutely, please.” Qrow watched as steaming fruit and sugary crumbs were piled into the bowl, then topped with a large scoop of vanilla ice cream.

Ozpin handed over the bowl. “Eat it before it melts.” He suggested.

Qrow did as he was told, and immediately burnt his tongue on the still-hot fruit beneath the ice cream. Still, the cold soothed it, and the sugary smoothness of the vanilla next to the warm, cinnamon sharpness of the apples was delicious. He slowed down, savouring it, watching Oscar and Ozpin serve their own desserts and Oscar run back to the kitchen to put the ice cream tub away before his melted. Ozpin refilled his wine glass in silence.

It didn’t take him long to polish off the bowl, and he sat back with a satisfied sigh. The meal really had been good, especially for something that had mostly been left alone while Ozpin had done other things. Qrow had always thought the simplest things were the best.

“That was amazing, Oz.” He said emphatically. “You really outdid yourself.”

Ozpin gave a vague hand wave and a small smile that belied his pride. “Thank you, but it’s really nothing.”

Oscar gave his father a quizzical glance, but didn’t speak, just poured himself some more elderflower cordial.

With that, the main meal was over, and Ozpin busied himself collecting the bowls and taking everything away. Qrow tried to get up and help, but Oz pressed a hand to his shoulder and pushed him back into his seat with a humoured smirk. Qrow watched him walk into the kitchen with his face reddening again. There was something sharp and electric in the air, and he knew Ozpin could feel it too.

Oz returned briefly to collect the large crumble dish, now cool enough for him to carry without the oven mitts. He left for longer this time, and Qrow relaxed a little, sipping his wine and trying to avoid making eye contact with Oscar across the table. The kid had been giving him a surveying kind of look all night, similar to Ozpin’s assessing stares but sharper, hard to meet. It was making him vaguely uncomfortable; he could feel it on the top of his head as he pointedly looked into his glass.

“You two had an argument, didn’t you?” Oscar asked quietly.

Qrow glanced towards the kitchen. The doors were still open, but if Ozpin had heard, he gave no indication. He turned back to Oscar and nodded. “Yeah. Last weekend.”

“You really upset him, you know.”

His stomach contracted painfully, and he almost winced. “I know. But I’m putting things right. That’s why I’m here.”

“No, it’s not.” Oscar didn’t elaborate further, and instead changed the subject, fiddling with the stem of his glass. “Ruby talks about you a lot.”

“So I’ve heard. She nice about me?”

“She’s nice about everyone. She always says you’re doing your best.”

Qrow shrugged. “Yeah. I guess I am.”

“Good.”

There was a clatter from the kitchen, and both Qrow and Oscar turned to look, watching Ozpin pick up whatever he had dropped from the tile. Oscar continued as though nothing had happened:

“Ruby and Yang are the only reason I have any friends at school. Ruby introduced me to all her friends and now I’m… just one of them. The same as everyone else.” He smiled. “I still don’t have any friends in class, but at least I have someone. I really owe them all.”

Qrow looked at him curiously; it was the most he’d ever heard Oscar speak at once. He noticed that while his accent was more local than Ozpin’s, he slipped into his father’s more formal inflection sometimes.

“Well,” He began. “If you feel that strongly about it, why don’t you tell them?”

“What? Why?”

“Because they’d love to hear that. They were the new kids in school at the start of the year, too. I remember how worried Ruby was that she wouldn’t make friends. I’m not saying write a thank you card or anything, just… Tell them.”

Oscar looked steadily at him for a moment, then nodded. “I will. Thanks. I… don’t really know why I told you that. And I’m still sorry I insulted your cooking.”

Qrow laughed. “That’s okay, kid. I deserved it.”

Oscar smiled sheepishly across the table.

Ozpin came back from the kitchen holding a large, flat plate, which he placed down in the centre of the table. It was piled with little sweets, truffles in milk and white chocolate and homemade peppermint creams, all in tiny paper wrappers to keep them from sticking together. Qrow and Oscar’s expressions were equally wide-eyed, though that didn’t stop Oscar immediately taking a truffle.

“This is really fancy, Oz.” Qrow commented. “Do you do this for every guest?”

Ozpin paused on his way out of the room again and smiled. “Truth be told, I may have gone to some extra effort.”

Qrow felt soft suddenly, grateful and a little undeserving, but mostly astonished that all of this trouble had been gone to just for him. The rush of affection that ran through him was nothing new, but it was powerful. He watched Ozpin in the kitchen, his back to him as he stirred something, and he finished his second glass of wine with the idea of steeling himself somewhere inside.

Ozpin finally returned to the table holding two tall glasses, salt-rimmed and filled with a pinkish liquid. He placed one down in front of Qrow, and sat down with the other.

Qrow stared at the glass, then at Oz, who was now wearing a smile like he was watching Qrow open a gag gift. “Is this what I think it is?” He asked.

“What do you think it is?” Ozpin asked.

He pulled the glass closer and smelled its contents. There was a waft of grapefruit juice, spiked with strong alcohol. “A Paloma. Oz, why-”

“A long time ago, not long after we first met, you talked about the drinks you liked, and the Paloma was the first one you mentioned. I know it might be… a little gauche to offer you a drink like this at the moment, but I’ve been sitting on the idea for a while. If you don’t want it, that’s fine. I won’t be offended.”

Qrow looked down at the drink and chuckled. “That wasn’t what I was gonna ask; believe me, I appreciate the drink. But… of all the things you could have chosen… tequila? If I’m not mistaken, you don’t drink often. What are you gonna do with the rest of it?”

“I’ll find something to do with it. Anyway, you did say the Paloma was one of your favourites.”

“It is! Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful.” He pulled his glass closer, fingers slipping on the condensation from the ice inside. “I’m just amazed you even remember any of that.”

“I remember.” Ozpin said cryptically.

Oscar picked up his own empty glass and the bottle of elderflower cordial, and stood up. “I’m going. I have to move my laundry over.”

“Alright.” Ozpin nodded. “The cordial needs to be refrigerated. Oh, and I finished with the book you wanted to borrow. It’s on my nightstand if you still want it.”

“Yeah, I’ll go get it. Thanks.” Oscar walked into the kitchen, put his glass in the sink and the bottle into the fridge, then closed the double doors to the dining room and turned out the kitchen light as he left.

Qrow turned from watching him to look at Ozpin. He realised neither of them had touched their drinks, and took a sip of his own. It was well-mixed, the grapefruit and soda covering all but the barest edge of the tequila; he was surprised Oz had gotten it so right if it was his first time making it.

“Just you and me, then, huh.” He said quietly.

Ozpin nodded, sipped his own drink, and grimaced slightly. “It feels as though it’s been a long time coming.”

Qrow self-consciously reached out and took a peppermint cream from the plate, hesitated, then set it back down. “Maybe we should talk.”

“Yes, I think so.” Ozpin shifted his chair slightly so that he was sitting closer to Qrow. Their knees touched under the table. “Although, admittedly, I don’t know where to start.”

“Then let me start. We’ve been dancing around this for too long.” He placed his left arm down on the table, and Ozpin reached over to entwine their fingers. Qrow smiled. “You feel it, don’t you?”

Ozpin nodded. “I’ve felt it for a long time. Almost as soon as we met, I saw something special in you. You made it… very difficult at times, but… I’ve had feelings for you for quite some time. Your courage, your strength, your tenderness... You are a remarkable man, Qrow. I’d like to get closer to you, if you want the same.”

Qrow’s eyes widened at hearing his own feelings reflected so similarly back at him. “I do.” He ducked his head, his face reddening again, away from that intense stare. “You know, when we first met, I thought you were… I don’t know. Odd.” He laughed. “And then I actually got to know you, and I’ve never… I’ve never known that sort of kindness. And let me tell you, you’ve got plenty of bravery of your own.”

“Thank you.” His voice was genuine and warm, but he sighed, and his face fell slightly. He squeezed Qrow’s fingers and looked down at his glass, his other hand tracing patterns in the condensation. “But… I need you to promise me something.”

Qrow nodded but didn’t speak.

“Our argument last weekend frightened me. That side of you, that comes out from alcohol and trauma… Neither of us want to see that again. Please, get the help you’ve said you will. For both of our sakes, but mostly for yours. You seem better today; I want to see you like this more often.”

He nodded again. “I will. I promise I will.” He crossed his heart with his right hand. “I was a wreck. I’ve been a wreck for a long time. But, Tai told me to take things a day at a time. Baby steps. And that’s what I’m doing, and I’ll keep doing it.” He half-smiled. “How am I supposed to make you happy if I can’t be happy myself?”

“I shouldn’t be your main priority.” Ozpin chided gently, but he was blushing. “Although… perhaps I can be for this evening.” He smiled coyly and took a large swig of his drink.

Qrow smirked. “I think that can be arranged.”

Ozpin put down his glass, and Qrow pushed his own away. There was a long, still moment of silence, and Qrow noticed that glimmer of something bright in Ozpin’s eyes again, and realised it was nerves. He imagined it was just as clear in his own. And then they were moving closer together, and Ozpin’s hand moved from his to rest on his cheek and tilt up his chin, and the motion made him draw in a ragged breath.

“May I?” Ozpin whispered.

“Please.” Qrow replied, closing his eyes.

And their lips met.

He tasted tequila, and salt from the rim of the glasses, a hint of citrus and a very human warmth that seemed to flood its way down his entire body. Ozpin’s other hand rested on his thigh, and Qrow remembered himself, moved his own hands to cup Ozpin’s face. He was trembling and the world was coming apart around him like a movie cliché until they were all that was left, the two of them kissing in a spotlight over Mexican cocktails.

Just like that, it was over, and Qrow opened his eyes to a world just as mundane as the one he’d left, as Ozpin pulled back. But his eyes were as bright gold as they’d ever been, and he didn’t move his hand from Qrow’s face, even as Qrow dropped his. He smiled, an affectionate, what-a-strange-experience-we-just-shared sort of smile, and Qrow breathlessly returned it.

“Now _that_ was a long time coming.” He commented.

Ozpin laughed. “Wasn’t it?” He stroked Qrow’s face and moved his hand to entwine their fingers again. “I’ve been waiting all night. I just couldn’t find the right time.”

“Well, I think that was it.” Qrow rubbed his thumb over Ozpin’s, slowly and deliberately. “So… I mean, do you wanna do this? Date? Can you still call it dating when you’re in your forties?”

“Whatever you call it, I’d like us to. I think I’ve known you long enough to say that… I can see a future with you. Even if it may be complicated.”

“Everything’s complicated if you look at it close enough.” He shrugged, trying not to show his shock. “But if you look at the big picture… well, maybe it’s deceptively simple.”

Ozpin looked at him curiously, and nodded. “Maybe it is. This…” He looked down at their entwined hands, to where he was sitting at the edge of his seat to be as close to Qrow as possible. “This was certainly easier than I expected.”

“Yeah.” Qrow moved forwards too with a flirtatious smirk. “Look, even an idiot can do it.”

And he kissed him again.

* * *

 

They decided to move from the dining room, collecting the last of the dishes and taking their drinks to the kitchen. Ozpin washed the dishes while Qrow dried, putting glasses and plates back into the dining room hutch in what he was sure was a haphazard manner, especially as he continued to drink his Paloma. It was deceptively strong; he thought it was a good thing that Ozpin was drinking his so slowly.

With the dishes done and put away, Ozpin grabbed the wine and two plain, stemless wine glasses and led Qrow, carrying both Palomas, back into the living room. He went back for the little plate of sweets, and this time, Qrow ate a peppermint cream as Ozpin turned on the TV and they settled on the couch. Qrow barely even registered what they were watching as Ozpin wrapped an arm around him, pulling him into his side. Now that the tension had finally been broken, his confidence seemed to have grown, and Qrow’s nerves were starting to melt away too. He’d always felt safe with Oz; this was no different.

They couldn’t keep their hands off each other, apart from a moment where Oscar peered into the room to say goodnight, and they shot upright and apart like their lives depended on it. Oscar sighed knowingly anyway. By eleven, they had finished their cocktails, and shared the rest of the wine between them. They were both tipsy, Ozpin much more noticeably so: Qrow wondered how often he drank like this, if ever. Their kisses kept being interrupted by Ozpin laughing, so happy and contagious that Qrow joined in every time.

Eventually, Oz pulled himself together a little and sat up from where he’d been lying almost underneath Qrow, then checked the clock.

“It’s getting late.” He commented, and tried to push up glasses he wasn’t wearing. “Do you need to get home? Ruby and Yang must be wondering where you are.”

“They know where I am.” Qrow pulled himself upright and stretched a kink out of his back. “And I told them not to wait up if I was late home. So I could stick around a little longer. Or even until morning.”

Ozpin looked at him steadily for a moment, unsmiling. Then he dropped his gaze to the ground, hands entwined in his lap. “Qrow, I’m not sure I can do that.”

He frowned and tilted his head. “If you need me to leave, I can. I don’t mind.”

“No, it’s not that.” He sighed. “This is complicated. I am… complicated.”

Qrow moved closer to him on the couch and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Oz, whatever the problem is, I’m right here. You really think this could be worse than you having dated Salem?”

He shook his head. “Do you know what it is for a person to be asexual?”

“Uh… I don’t know, maybe, I’m not sure. Can you explain?”

“It’s a lack of sexual attraction, lack of libido, lack of desire. Some asexual people can still enjoy sex, others don’t.” He paused. “I should have told you sooner. I am asexual, and I don’t enjoy sex in the slightest.” His eyes closed, and he hung his head like he was expecting to be scolded.

“Oh. Okay.” Qrow said softly. He wrapped his arm around Ozpin’s waist and leaned his head on his shoulder. “You know that doesn’t bother me, right?”

Ozpin looked up, eyebrows knitted, expression hopeful. “Not at all?”

“Well…” He tried to search for any negative feelings on the matter, but there were none to find. “No. I care about you, Oz. Not what you can give me, or… or you putting on pretences to please me or whatever. You. _All_ of you, as you are. You don’t have to hide any of you from me.” He rested his other hand on Ozpin’s face and sat upright so that their eyes met. “I don’t mind.”

Oz smiled, and leaned in to kiss him again, clumsy and hard and tasting of peppermint. The curve of his lips was tangible. When it was over, he rested their foreheads together.

“So, do you want me to leave?” Qrow asked, still a little lost.

“No.” Ozpin said quickly. “I’m not asking you to sleep with me, but… I am asking you to stay with me.”

“Alright.” He smiled, and pressed a quick peck to Ozpin’s lips.

“Would you like hot cocoa before bed?”

“I absolutely would.”

* * *

 

Ozpin was clumsy with the cocoa, almost knocking the pan off the stove as soon as he’d filled it with milk. Qrow laughed and gently nudged him aside to stir the milk as it heated and pour in the powder. Oz simply wrapped both his arms around Qrow’s chest from behind and rested his head on his shoulder, his breath and skin hot on Qrow’s neck. The combination of the alcohol and the situation was making him feel giddy and buoyant, ready to float away.

They drank their cocoa quickly; it was nearing midnight, and Oz had started to yawn. Qrow hadn’t stirred the mixture thoroughly enough, and there were clumps of powder at the bottom of the mugs. He offered to wash them out, but Ozpin practically pulled him out of the kitchen, leaving the mugs and glasses in the sink. He was shown to the master bedroom, and left there for a moment while Ozpin brushed his teeth in the en suite.

The bedroom was sparser than the rest of the house, but there was still a bookshelf in here, and another smaller shelving unit that held a gilt-edged tea set and several books on the occult. A row of hooks on the wall held only scarves in various colours and styles, maybe ten or twelve of them, including Oz’s favourite green one and the black knitted one he’d lent to Qrow. On top of the dresser, a row of framed photographs showed a short timeline of Ozpin and Oscar’s lives: From a much younger Oscar being carried on Ozpin’s back to a recent photo of Oscar, red-faced, holding a certificate for something. Qrow smiled as he inspected them, then sat down on the padded bench at the end of the queen-size bed.

Ozpin was back before long, and pressed a spare toothbrush into Qrow’s hand. He brushed his teeth quickly and swilled mouthwash, then left the brush in the cup on the counter with Ozpin’s. He hesitated in front of the mirror for a moment, and realised he was nervous again. He didn’t display his scars lightly. He forced himself to walk back into the bedroom, and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of Ozpin.

He was sitting on the bench at the end of the bed, shedding his jeans, and he was perfect. From the curve of his spine to the light roll of fat at his waist, the pale pinkish colour of his flushed skin to the soft freckles that dotted his shoulders. When he looked up it was with a bashful smile, and Qrow saw the anxiety in his eyes again.

“You’re beautiful, you know.” He said quietly.

Ozpin looked down and shook his head, then stood up and started to fold his clothes, laying them back on the bench. “Just get undressed.” He instructed.

“Yes, sir.” Qrow smirked with satisfaction as Ozpin’s face turned even redder. His own hands were shaking, but he unbuttoned his shirt hastily, hoping that faking confidence would make him feel it for real.

Ozpin was only half-looking at him, and seemed to notice his hesitation, because he moved to sit at the side of the bed, facing away from him.

He stripped down to his boxers, copying Oz and folding his clothes, piling them on the other end of the bench. Then, slowly, he walked over and sat beside him on the edge of the bed, at his right. “You okay?” He asked.

He nodded and gave a small smile. “You just looked like you needed some space.”

Qrow shrugged and nodded. “Just a little nervous.”

“You and me both. But…” He looked Qrow over, and this time the stare was not assessing; it was admiring. “You needn’t be.”

“Neither should you.” Qrow took Ozpin’s right hand with his left, leaving the underside of his arm exposed. He felt Ozpin tense as he noticed the scars on his upper arm, but he didn’t say anything.

A long finger tentatively traced the train-track of marks, then ran gently across the glass-smatter of those on his upper chest. “Is this alright?” Ozpin whispered.

“Yeah.” And he found that it was.

He took Ozpin’s wandering hand and held it, flat, to his chest over the tattoo of the flowers, to feel his eager heartbeat. Then he moved his other hand from Ozpin’s and took his waist instead, leaned in close and kissed first his neck, then his jaw, his cheek, then his lips. He wondered if Oz could feel how his heart rate had sped up even further.

Ozpin reciprocated, and pushed Qrow back gently. Qrow realised what he was trying to do, and their lips separated as he leaned back against the pillows. Ozpin moved in to continue, then tilted his head and turned away to yawn hugely.

He laughed. “I’m sorry. I’m very tired.”

Qrow chuckled as well, and pulled himself upright again. “Maybe we should just go to bed. How long have you been up?”

“Oh, eighteen hours, give or take.”

“Jeez. Yeah, it’s bedtime.”

Ozpin nodded and let Qrow stand up. “Could you turn out the light for me?”

“Sure.” He walked around the bed to flip the light switch by the door, then got into bed on that side. The sheets were cool and crisp on his warm skin, a sharp contrast to the hot hands that immediately found him under the comforter.

They moved around for a few minutes until they finally found a comfortable position, heads on the same pillow, legs entangled, arms at one another’s waists. Qrow knew that it would get too warm soon, and hoped he’d fall asleep before he noticed. In the moment, he’d rarely felt so comfortable. Ozpin’s hand had found the lower of the two scars on his back, the one that was almost a mirror of that on the back of his shoulder. His fingers ran over it, back and forth, tracing its shape, making it just as loved as any other part of him.

He closed his eyes, the ghost of a smile still on his face.

* * *

 

Saturday dawned after a dreamless sleep, the morning cool and punctuated by the spatter of rain on the window. Ozpin was already up, his side of the bed empty, and Qrow checked the time on his phone as he put his clothes back on. It was almost nine; he really needed to get home. The kids already had questions: Yang had texted him to see where he was, and he told her truth, and that he’d be home by ten. The idea of explaining his relationship with their school principal made him cringe, but he knew it would be worth the effort. He just hoped they wouldn’t laugh.

He found Ozpin in the kitchen, sipping green tea and leaning on the counter. He was wearing the same jeans as yesterday with an unusually casual long-sleeved t-shirt. His expression was a little weary, but he perked up and smiled as Qrow entered.

“Good morning.” He said, straightening up and putting down his cup.

“Hey. You alright?” Qrow kissed his cheek.

“I have a bit of a headache, that’s all. I’ll be fine in an hour.”

“You don’t usually drink that much, huh?”

“Very, very rarely. But I don’t regret it.” He paused, and his smile grew wider. “I had a good night.”

“Me too.” Qrow grinned. “But unfortunately, I’ve gotta get home. Yang’s already wondering where I am.”

“Would you like something to eat before you go? Or do you want me to drive you home?”

“No, no, don’t worry about that. I’ll walk, I’ll be fine. I need a shower anyway.” He joked.

“Qrow.” Ozpin intoned.

“Honestly, Oz, I’ll be fine.” He took his hand and squeezed it. “I’ll eat something and dry off when I get home.”

“You are so _stubbornly_ independent.” He shook his head, but smiled. “I do have something for you to take home with you, though.” He pulled away from Qrow and took a Christmas candy tin out of one of the cabinets, placing it on the counter in front of him.

“What’s this?” Qrow asked, and opened it. Inside were stacks of the small honey and chocolate chip cookies he’d been given yesterday. “Oz, that’s-”

“A lot, yes. I doubled the recipe, and it turned out to be a mistake.” He smiled and shrugged. “Oscar and I can’t eat them all on our own. You might as well have half while they’re still fresh. I know Ruby and Yang will eat them.”

Qrow nodded and put the lid back on the tin. “You really never cease to amaze me, Oz. Thank you.”

“You’re most welcome.” Ozpin pulled him close again, one hand on his waist, one knitting into his hair, and kissed him so deeply and warmly a summer night might have visited the winter morning.

Qrow was blinking in the brightness of the kitchen by the time he pulled away. “I really, really have to go. I wish I didn’t, but… adult responsibilities.”

“I know. I wouldn’t keep you from Ruby and Yang forever.” He touched Qrow’s face again, and fondness shone in his eyes. “Take care of yourself, and of them. We should meet again soon, to discuss Salem.”

“Yeah. As soon as possible. For a lot of reasons.” He smiled. “We’re gonna do this. We’re gonna get her out of this town. We make a great team; if anyone can do it, it’s us.”

“You’re right.” Ozpin nodded sagely. “In the meantime… Call the doctor on Monday, won’t you?”

“I will. I promised you.”

“You did.”

Ozpin found Qrow a grocery bag to carry the cookie tin home, then led him to the hallway to get his jacket. He also handed over his long black scarf, which Qrow was sure had not been hanging there the night before. He tried to protest, but the look Ozpin gave him was persuasive, and truthfully, Qrow was glad to have it back. They embraced one last time in the narrow shaft of light through the frosted glass of the front door, and then Ozpin was waving him off from the doorstep.

Qrow meandered down the hill towards home, cookies clutched tightly in one hand, the other stuffed into his pocket, hair getting progressively flatter in the rain. He couldn’t wipe the sappy grin off his face, feeling the ghost of lips on his, still remembering the heat of a handprint over his heart. Months’ worth of stress seemed to have, at least temporarily, melted off him. And now, with a real plan to deal with Salem, one of his biggest problems felt a lot more insignificant. He still needed a car, and a job, and a real idea of what the future held. But now he was looking at it from a different angle, one where the perspective was more accurate and he could see it all for the size it truly was.

The rain poured harder, and Qrow shivered, and embraced the feeling of being alive.


	30. Unbreakable Bonds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow has some explanations for Ruby and Yang, and starts trying to fit his life back together again.

Qrow showered, changed, and took his wet clothes down to the laundry as soon as he got back to the apartment, glad to get back into the warmth. Once everything, including Ozpin’s scarf, was spinning in the washing machine, he went back upstairs, grabbed the cookie tin from where he’d left it on his bed, and headed for the living room. Yang was lying on the couch, legs dangling over the arm as she watched something on her phone. She paused it and looked up as he walked in.

“This is why you told us not to wait up, huh?” She asked.

Qrow sighed at the hint of sarcastic humour in her voice. “Yep.” He walked across the room to put the tin down on the kitchen counter. “Where’s Ruby?”

“In our room; she only just woke up.”

“Well, do me a favour and go get her, will you? I need to talk to both of you.”

Yang gave him a calm, level look, then nodded and got up.

Qrow poured himself a glass of water and sipped it while she was gone. He was about to grab a cookie from the tin when she came back, Ruby close behind. They came over to see what he was doing, and he inclined the tin towards them.

“Help yourselves.” He said, and ate one of the small cookies in one bite.

“Wow. Did Professor Ozpin give you these?” Ruby asked, then picked up a cookie and took a bite.

“Yeah. He made them.”

“They smell good.” Yang commented, and warily took one herself. “Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“They’re more for you two than they are for me. You’re the ones with the sweet tooth.” Qrow leaned back on the counter behind him and sipped his water.

“You should tell him we said thanks!” Ruby finished her first cookie, then surreptitiously took three more.

“Anyway, I thought you wanted to talk to us?” Yang asked, brushing crumbs off her fingers.

“Yeah, I do.” He found himself nervous again. “I mean, you’ve already figured out what’s going on, right?”

Yang and Ruby looked at each other warily, and Yang shrugged. “I have an idea.”

“Wait, what’s going on?” Ruby asked frantically, desperate not to be left out.

Qrow hesitated. The truth was big; it felt too large for his body to contain. He’d promised honesty, but it was early, there had barely been time for things to settle. On the other hand, when he thought about it, he couldn’t see that being a problem. Ozpin had been right; there was a future for them. There was nothing clearer than that. But then what if the kids spread the news around school? Would Oz get into trouble? He grasped desperately for some other, plausible explanation, a safety net, something irrational. But there was no better truth, and Yang, at the least, would see through him anyway.

He sighed at their expectant expressions. “Ozpin and I are seeing each other.”

“Seeing each other?” Ruby tilted her head. “Like… dating?”

“Yeah. Dating. Whatever you want to call it.” He could feel his face reddening again and felt exceptionally stupid.

“I thought you said you were ‘just friends’?” Yang shaped the quotations with her finger. “Did you lie about that, too?”

“No, that was true at the time.” He paused. “Look, I know it’s weird, but I think it’s important you know, even if I’d really rather you didn’t. And I should have told you I was staying out overnight. I’m sorry I didn’t.”

There was a short silence, but Ruby broke it. “It’s not that weird.” She said. “If you two really like each other, why _shouldn’t_ you date? Just because it’s Professor Ozpin?”

Qrow shook his head. “I just thought you’d find it strange that it’s… your high school principal. Anyway, he could probably get in trouble. Pretty sure it’s frowned upon for teachers to date their students’ parents.”

Yang frowned and stated the obvious. “But… you’re not our dad.”

He chuckled. “No, but I am your legal guardian. Same deal. I’m a little worried about someone seeing us together and… I don’t know. Getting Ozpin fired.”

“Well, you two have been friends for this long without anyone saying anything.” She shrugged. “Anyone who’s been paying enough attention to have noticed clearly doesn’t care.”

“True. But… Well, it’s a little different.” He frowned briefly, then shrugged it off. “Anyway, that isn’t something you two need to worry about. But do me a favour: Don’t tell anyone. Especially anyone who might let it get back to the school governors. Particularly Weiss.”

“Why Weiss?”

“Because her dad and Oz don’t get along, and Jacques has a lot of power on the board. Weiss might not tell him on purpose, but… I just want to be careful.”

“We can keep it to ourselves.” Ruby nodded and mimed zipping her lips.

Qrow smiled. “Good. I appreciate it.”

“Does Oscar know?” Yang asked casually.

He shrugged. Ozpin hadn’t mentioned telling Oscar what was going on, but the knowing look he’d given them the night before said that perhaps he didn’t need to. “He probably will soon if he doesn’t now.”

“Wait!” Ruby exclaimed. “Are we gonna be-”

Qrow cut her off and put his hands up. “No, I know what you're about to ask. Do me a favour and wait a few months before you ask again.”

She gave him a non-serious glare. “You already know.”

He put his hands over his face in mock-frustration, and to hide the smile he couldn’t suppress.

Ruby departed from the living area not long after to take a shower and get dressed, leaving Qrow alone with Yang again. He made them both coffee, then sat down on the couch while Yang sat at his desk, swinging around in the chair as she reinstalled an old game on his PC. There was a long silence; his coffee was half-empty by the time she spoke to him again.

“You know, I called Mom last night.” She said.

Qrow looked up from his coffee, a distracted smile dropping off his face. He struggled for the best way to respond for a moment. “Oh. How’d it go?”

Yang shrugged. “She hung up on me.”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know. I called, she answered, I told her who it was, and she hung up. Guess she changed her mind on wanting to talk to me.”

“Ugh. God, Yang, I’m sorry she did that to you.” He looked at her worriedly. “Are you alright?”

“I’m over it.” She glanced at the PC screen, then back at Qrow. “I was upset last night, but… Maybe it’s for the best. If she doesn’t want anything to do with me, I don’t have to worry about her anymore.”

“Well… Yeah, I guess. But you’re allowed to be mad at her for it. I would be.”

“I barely know her.” She corrected herself. “I _don’t_ know her. She’s not my mom, not really. Summer was my mom. Raven’s a DNA donor.” A hint of bitterness entered her voice but quickly lifted. “I’ve got Ruby, and Dad, and you. I don’t need her.”

Qrow listened and nodded slowly. “If you’re sure. But… Well, maybe it’d help you to get back into counselling at school, now the new semester’s started.”

She looked at him icily. “I’ll go back into counselling when _you_ start counselling.”

“Alright, deal.” He agreed quickly. “I’m calling the doctor on Monday for a referral.”

“Really?” Her eyebrows shot up. “Well, okay. Deal. I guess I’ll start too.”

“Good.” He paused. “Thanks for letting me know about this, by the way.”

“No problem. Oh, and I wanted to give you something.”

He watched, confused, as she stood up and pulled her wallet from the pocket of her cargo pants, then opened it and took something out of the ID window.

She stepped closer and held out a tiny Polaroid to him. “Here. I don’t want this anymore. I’m sick of looking at her face.”

Qrow took the photo and looked at the images, smiling Tai and sleeping Yang, and Raven dead behind the eyes.

“I know you like to keep that stuff safe, so… You can put it back where it came from. But… could you find me something else? Not right now, just when you have time. Something of me and Dad and Ruby?”

He nodded. “Yeah, I can try. I don’t think I’ve got anything else this small, but maybe we should get something printed. We can take a look tomorrow, if you like.” He tucked the photo into his pocket and finished his coffee.

“Yeah, that’d be great.” She sat down in the desk chair again and smiled. “Thanks.”

* * *

 

Ozpin messaged Qrow shortly after lunch, polite and warm, saying how nice it had been to see him and when could they do it again? Qrow smiled as he replied, and they puzzled out another meeting the next Friday to work out a precise plan of action. It felt like too long to wait, and he wished that they had more time, more privacy; he had no doubt they’d figure it out, but when things were this fresh, he wanted to be close to Ozpin as often as possible. Still, they had waited this long. His patience could hold.

Throughout the conversation Qrow wondered if he should be typing his messages differently now, if he should be ending them with an ‘x’ like he sometimes did with Tai, like they’d always done back when they’d been together. He went back and forth on it, wondering if it was too soon, or if it even mattered. He still couldn’t quite believe how much everything had changed in less than twenty-four hours. Everything at Ozpin’s house seemed to have happened to someone else, to some other version of Qrow. It kept coming back to him in vivid memories of details: The scent of cinnamon, the crease of skin, a kiss tasting of grapefruit. He smiled involuntarily.

More as a distraction than anything, Qrow started to clean the apartment, clearing living room clutter and dusting the surfaces. Yang got up from the game she was playing to help, and he had her dust off the desk and the two figurines on it whilst he mopped the floor. After a while, Ruby came in for a drink, and joined in whilst Yang played music from the PC. Qrow opened the window to air out the room and disinfected the kitchen sink and draining board, then wiped down all the counters and unloaded the clean dishes from the dishwasher into the cabinets.

After a couple of hours, the living area and hallway looked and smelled very clean. Ruby and Yang had flopped down on the couch while Qrow had polished the dining table, and now wore expressions that suggested they’d never voluntarily clean again. Qrow thanked them for helping as a kind of permission for them to leave, and was glad when they did. He had two more things to deal with.

He left Yang’s music on in the background and grabbed a new trash bag from under the sink. Then he opened the liquor cabinet and looked inside. He needed to keep a stash of alcohol around, but there was too much in here that he’d never drink. He started taking the bottles out, standing them on the nearest countertop one by one. There were still two unopened bottles, the handles of vodka and whiskey he’d bought the last weekend. Reluctantly, he chose to keep them; if he stayed disciplined, they would keep him going for a while.

Every other bottle in the cabinet was open, and he poured their contents down the sink one by one. First was the other handle of vodka, still two-thirds full. It pained him a little to watch it swirl around the drain, but he was glad to see the space it left when he put the empty bottle into the trash bag. Behind it were three bottles that had been abandoned for god only knew how long: A small bottle of white rum, half-empty; a large bottle of gin, nearly full; and a bottle of peach schnapps that Tai had given him when he’d emptied his stuff out of the house, and which had only a sip left in it. He poured them all away, tossed the bottles, and admired the empty cabinet.

Right then, he made a decision, as he put the handles of vodka and whiskey back, lonely on the shelf. He decided that they were his ration. He would get his drinking down to a reasonable level, only drinking socially and casually, by the time the bottles were empty. If he couldn’t do that, he would go cold turkey, check himself into the hospital if necessary. He didn’t _want_ to quit altogether; he was sure that would shut him out of bar work. And as much as he’d complained about bartending, he did enjoy the work, using his hands, interacting with the customers. Moderation: That was the key to get him back into it. He had to at least try to make it work.

He closed the cabinet door and moved to the drawer under the counter next to it, opening it until the runners protested to see the contents. It was a mess, stacks of little boxes and slim plastic sleeves of medication between band aids and leftover gauze wound dressings. He started to repeat the process he’d used with the cabinet, stacking it all on the counter and then sorting it. The band aids and cold meds went back in at the front, then the normal painkillers. A loose sleeve of aspirin with only one pill left went into the trash, followed by what was left of the extra-strength painkillers he’d been prescribed in September, and the full, unopened box of Vicodin.

There was one last box, and he paused, turning it over in his fingers for a moment, staring at the word ‘citalopram’ until it turned into a livid mint-green blur. It was light; twenty-one of the twenty-eight pills had been taken before he’d suddenly stopped one day, decided that antidepressants were not for him. He’d kept them for… some reason he couldn’t even remember anymore. He couldn’t take them now, and a week’s worth wouldn’t give him any effect anyway. But perhaps he could take the box to show his new doctor what he had taken before and hated, to help them find something that suited him better. He took the pills out of the box and tossed them, flattened it, and stashed it at the back of the drawer again.

Qrow emptied the kitchen trash into the bag, then took the recycling bag from under the sink and tied them both up. They were both heavy with bottles, and he grimaced as he took them out to the dumpsters in the parking lot. His phone vibrated in his pocket as he headed downstairs, but Ozpin would have to wait until he was unencumbered.

He tossed the bags with some effort, then paused under the walkway awning to check his phone. To his surprise, it wasn’t a text he had received; it was an email. The sender was a name he didn’t recognise, but as he read they announced themselves to be contacting him on behalf of The Albatross: the dive bar he’d applied for a bartending job at. They wanted to interview him the next Friday morning. Qrow threw both arms up in the air in unrestrained relief and celebration, then remembered where he was and lowered them sheepishly. He saved the interview in his calendar, a little hope leaping in his chest.

He ran back up the stairs still smiling.

* * *

 

On Sunday, as they’d discussed, Yang and Qrow took the box of photos from under his bed and started to look through them. Qrow made sure he saw everything first, flicked past the embarrassing ones fast enough that Yang didn’t ask about them, and found a few photos of her with Tai and Ruby. Most of them were old, showing both girls under ten, but there were a few more recent ones. The best one Qrow had was from when they were both in middle school, Yang thirteen and already growing tall, Ruby eleven and messy-haired. Tai grinned from between them.

Yang chose that one, and Qrow put it aside to copy and get a smaller print of. She left, and he continued to sort through the box, taking a few more photos from it and stacking them on the bedside table. Then he knelt on the floor again, and reached under the bed behind where the box was kept, until his hand brushed hard edges. He pulled out four mismatched standard-sized photo frames and sat them on the bed while he put the box back. Ozpin had been right about choosing to remember the things that hurt, but Qrow didn’t think it was any good keeping the happy memories in the same box.

He framed another copy of the photo he’d given Ruby all those months back, both girls, Tai, Summer, and himself all beaming against a professional background. It made him smile again as he stood the frame on his dresser. When he thought about it, they had always been a strange kind of family, non-traditional at least. They still were. But the love was the important part. Qrow had found himself understanding that a lot better over the last few days as he’d spent time with the kids.

He took the rest of his photos and frames into the living room, where Ruby and Yang were bickering on the couch as Ruby tried to lie down with her legs on Yang.

“Don’t put your feet on me, that’s gross!” Yang pushed Ruby away.

Ruby stuck her tongue out and waved her bare feet in Yang’s face with a gloating sound, and Yang leaned back over the arm of the couch, getting worryingly close to a full glass of water on the side table.

“Hey, watch it.” Qrow snatched up the glass before it could fall and placed it on the coffee table instead. “And Ruby, leave your sister alone.”

Ruby rolled her eyes, but sat up at the other end of the couch. “What are you doing?” She asked of the frames in his arms.

“Well… I thought I’d put some photos up. What do you think?” He splayed out the three photos in his hand to show them the images: One of himself and Tai from fifteen years ago, before Ruby was born; one of them with both kids in front of the elephant enclosure at Oregon Zoo; and the one of Summer he loved so much, where she stared eternally into the sunlight.

Ruby gently took the last one from him, looking intently at her mother for a moment, then back up at him. “I’ve never seen this one before.”

“Yeah you have, it used to be framed in the house.” Yang looked to Qrow for confirmation. “Right?”

“Yeah, it was.” He nodded.

“Then I guess I don’t remember.” Ruby handed it back sadly.

“Well, that’s why I want to put up in here. So you can see it.” Qrow moved to sit down in the armchair and started fastening the photos into their frames.

“How old was she there?”

“Nineteen. Not much older than you two, really.”

“Yeah, that’s weird to think about.” Yang frowned. “That’ll be me in… a year and a half.”

“Time flies.” Qrow fiddled with the stiff fastenings of the last frame. “So, are you two alright with these ancient photos of you sitting around?”

“If I was okay with that one of me when I was thirteen, those are nothing.” She joked. “Anyway, I remember that trip to the zoo, it was amazing. Remember how close the giraffes got? And Ruby started screaming cause they scared her?”

“Their tongues are creepy, and I stand by that!” Ruby exclaimed.

Qrow got the final photo into its frame, and stood up again to display them in the few spaces there were. He placed the one from the zoo on the bookshelf at eye-level, and the one of Summer beside it, so that she seemed to be looking at it. Then he stood the one of Tai and himself on the side table looking out across the room.

“There. How’s that?” He asked.

“It’s nice.” Yang nodded. “Makes it look like we actually live here again now we’ve cleaned.”

“Well, isn’t that a relief. Ruby?”

“I like it. Are you gonna put up any more?”

“Not right now; I don’t have enough surfaces to put them on. Maybe sometime, though.”

Ruby smiled. “I hope so.”

He smiled back, and remembered something else he’d been meaning to do today. “Oh, by the way, I was gonna tell you: I’m going back to Ozpin’s on Friday night. We’ve got important work to do, so… Are you two okay with me staying overnight again?” His heartrate increased with the words, but he tried not to acknowledge it.

Ruby responded first, shrugging. “I guess so. Can we order pizza or something?”

Qrow pulled a face. “We’ll see how my job interview goes. If it goes well I’ll leave you some cash.”

“Okay.”

“When will you be back on Saturday?” Yang asked.

“I’m not sure, but I’d guess afternoon. Like I say, we’re… There’s a lot to do. I’ll say 3 pm.”

“Alright. Do you need us to do anything while you’re gone?”

His eyebrows shot up, but shook his head. “No, I don’t think so, just keep up with your laundry and do the dishes like usual.” He hit upon an idea to soften the blow of his absence. “Although, if you want, you could invite a friend or two over while I’m gone.”

“Really?” Ruby asked, her eyes lighting up.

“Sure, why not? You always go to your friends’ places, maybe it’s time they came here. And this way I won’t be in your way.”

“So… Could we ask Weiss and Blake to come?” Yang asked warily.

“Yeah, go ahead. We deep-cleaned everything, we just gotta keep it this way until the weekend. You just need to get your bedroom this clean, too.”

“We can do that.”

“Well… There you go, then. Make sure they can get themselves home, though, cause I can’t guarantee I’ll have a car by then.”

“We’ll check. Should we ask them now?”

“If you like. The more notice, the better.” He smiled as they both scrambled for their phones. “Just remember I’m not far away, alright?”

“We know.” Yang rolled her eyes and smiled, and Qrow felt like he was doing something right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of a filler-y chapter this week to get Qrow back to a nice level point! I'm now gonna take a pretty long break for the holidays: 10 days, because I have a lot of family stuff going on and won't have my laptop much. I'm hoping by the time I'm back, I'll have the rest of the story finished and I can focus on editing and posting it! Anyway, I hope you all have a very happy holidays, and I'll see you all again on the 29th!


	31. Coalescence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow continues to glue the pieces of his life back together, and returns to Ozpin's house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I return! With way less of a lead on myself than I expected! I thought I would finish the whole story over the holidays but between family gatherings and health issues I've written barely anything. I did at least finally decide how many chapters this thing's gonna be! So anyway, enjoy!

Traffic idled around a crashed car on the seafront road as thin winter sun beat down, doing little to warm the morning. Qrow sighed in the driver’s seat, fumbling with the centre console to turn on the heating. He was still not used to the car, a six-year-old Japanese hatchback with an automatic gearbox. Qrow didn’t like automatics; he’d go so far as to say he hated them, but it was all the Vale dealership had been able to offer on his budget and at short notice. It had taken hours of phone calls to the dealer and his insurance, but he’d finally picked the thing up yesterday.

It wasn’t so bad, he considered, as traffic edged forwards. Just having the freedom of knowing he could get around was something, and this car didn’t guzzle gas the way his truck had. It wasn’t rusty around the wheel wells, and he knew that it had been serviced for any problems recently. The fact it was an unpleasant shade of brownish-red and had an annoying gearbox was something he could deal with. And he’d been glad for the car today.

He was driving back from his first job interview in over five years, at the dive bar down at the south end of town. The Albatross was not his favourite place, but he’d frequented it back when he’d moved to Vale from the house in Patch, and couldn’t afford to drink himself into a stupor at the nicer bars in town. None of the staff he knew from that time were still around, and there had been no customers; The Albatross didn’t open until midday. The interview had gone well, at least. The manager had mentioned that he was overqualified, but that they could start him on a higher wage if he would prove his skills. They’d had him make a few drinks and show he could pour a beer, and Qrow had felt a little insulted, but he knew it wasn’t like The Gold Bar here. Fancy cocktails were not on the menu.

He was feeling confident, though; he felt sure he had that job in the bag. They would get back to him in a week or so, they’d said, so Qrow was expecting two, and in the meantime he would apply for more positions just in case. He’d had another call back, this one for a kitchen job that he knew would suck the life and soul out of him. He was debating rejecting the interview offer, but knew it would be in his best interests to have a backup. They wanted him on Tuesday, and he had resigned himself to going. Just in case he was wrong.

Traffic finally sped up a little, although drivers in front of him were still rubbernecking the crashed car that was now diagonal to the road, the front end on the sidewalk, crumpled against a lamppost. Qrow glanced over briefly as he passed, and was relieved to see the driver standing, unharmed, between two police officers on the sidewalk. He raised his speed to follow the car in front further down the seafront road, then turned off towards his apartment.

When he got in, he changed his stiff white shirt for a t-shirt so old the print had faded entirely, and flattened his bangs down from where he’d had them neatly pushed back. He’d change again later before he went to Ozpin’s place, but for now he just wanted to be comfortable. Despite what they’d said, he, Ruby, and Yang had let the living area get untidy again, and he wanted to at least get his own stuff out of the way.

He spent most of the day alternating between cleaning for ten minutes and taking twenty minute breaks to check his phone, rereading the forwarded email from Salem, wishing he could talk to Ozpin now. They’d spoken on the phone this morning, and had been texting all week leading up to their meeting tonight. Qrow felt a little strange still calling it that, and wondered if he should be calling them ‘dates’ now or if that was a thing for younger people than them. Regardless, he’d bought a bottle of nice wine to take up to the house with him, and planned to take his half-full flask just in case. He was driving there, but he’d be dead sober by the time he left tomorrow afternoon. Or he’d better be, at least.

His serious efforts to stop drinking had made the week difficult so far, as he’d been trying to drink just enough to keep withdrawal symptoms at bay. He’d slipped up once, and on Tuesday evening he’d gotten quietly tipsy in a fit of desperate need. The cravings were godawful, the desire for the numb dizziness he was missing sometimes overpowering everything else. He was keeping himself busy, and trying to take advice he’d read online, stopping everything to do deep breathing exercises when things got bad even though they didn’t really help. It was distraction, and distraction was helpful.

Another website had told him to mimic his muscle memory to soothe his cravings, the way some smokers would pretend to take a drag of an invisible cigarette to stave off theirs. So every now and then, he’d pick up his flask, mime unscrewing the lid, and raise it to take a fake sip. It made him feel stupid, even alone in the apartment, but it did help just enough for him to go back to whatever he was doing for a while. When the shaking hands and headache that warned of worse withdrawals appeared, he would open the flask for real, but instead of sipping the whiskey straight, would pour a little into a glass and mix it with whatever was available. He figured as time went on he could use less in each drink, wean himself off.

He still wasn’t really sure it would even work like that, but he was going to try to make sure it did.

* * *

 

He found himself nervous again as the day dragged on, an irrational wondering of what he should do or say or wear even though he knew Ozpin would be happy to see him no matter what. It was a relief when he finished work at four and texted Qrow to double check when he’d be arriving. They chatted about Ozpin’s day at work and Qrow’s interview as he got ready and packed an overnight bag, and the nerves lifted as conversation came as easily as ever. He could feel the warmth in the words. He was excited to feel it in his hands again.

He left the apartment at five fifteen, then immediately had to let himself back in to pick up his forgotten wine and leave some cash behind for the kids to get their pizza. Finally, he made it down to the car, and peeled out of the parking lot at pace. He was worried he’d be late, but found that the drive up to Ozpin’s place was a lot easier and quicker than the walk had been. He pulled into the driveway at five twenty-five, and parked cautiously behind the green sedan, careful to leave plenty of space between the two. Then he walked up to the door and rang the doorbell the same way he had a week ago.

There was a short pause, and Qrow adjusted his grip on his bag so that he could tug Ozpin’s scarf away from his neck a little. He’d washed it again with his wet clothes last week, and hadn’t been able to resist wearing it back to the house. Part of him almost wished he could keep it, but he thought the passing of it back and forth was the more special part. Anyway, he’d kept it for three months at one point; he hadn’t told Ozpin just how often he’d worn it over that time.

The front door opened, and Ozpin was standing there in the hall, smiling radiantly. Qrow grinned back, and they kissed briefly over the threshold.

Ozpin pushed his glasses up. “Come in.”

Qrow walked in and put his bag and the wine on the ground to shed his jacket as Ozpin closed the door. “I brought your scarf back. Is it okay if I leave it in here for now?”

“Oh. Yes, of course. I didn’t expect you to bring it back so quickly.”

Qrow smirked. “Why, you thought I’d steal it?”

“Well, last time you almost did.”

“Aw come on, you didn’t know any better than I did.” He hung the jacket and scarf on a coat hook and picked up the bottle from the floor. “By the way, I brought the wine tonight.” He waved the bottle in Ozpin’s direction.

Oz took it and inspected the label in silence for a moment.

“Uh… I don’t really know jack shit about wine, but it was ten bucks, so… hopefully it’s alright.”

“Moscato. This looks like a sweet variety, so it’ll go nicely with dessert.” He lowered the bottle and smiled. “That’s very generous of you. Thank you.”

“It’s alright. I’ll help you make dinner too. I don’t feel like I did enough to help last week.”

“You did plenty.” Ozpin shook his head. “Come on. Let’s make some tea and talk before dinner again.”

He led Qrow into the kitchen, where he carefully placed the wine bottle into the fridge, then filled the electric kettle and set it to boil. He leaned back against the counter, and Qrow approached him, taking his hand and pressing their bodies together, trying to get as close as he could. Ozpin let out a huff of surprised laughter and rested his other hand on the small of Qrow’s back.

He spoke softly into Qrow’s ear. “How are you?”

“Surviving.” Qrow sighed. It was hard to think straight; he hadn’t had a drink today, and it was hot in here, and he and Ozpin were incredibly close together. He forced himself onward. “It’s not been as bad as I thought it’d be, but… it’s still been pretty bad.”

Ozpin nodded, and rubbed his back comfortingly. “I can only imagine. But you’ve come a long way already. Only two weeks ago, you were at rock bottom. Look at you now.”

Qrow pulled away to look him in the eye, and nodded hesitantly. “Yeah. It just doesn’t feel like enough.”

“Qrow, I don’t think you will ever be satisfied with yourself, no matter how hard you work. You have very real reasons for the way you’re doing things. Don’t let anyone make you doubt them.”

“No one’s trying to. Just me.” He jabbed a finger at his temple and sighed. “I know this phase will end, eventually, but it’s killing me. It’s just… finding the balance between drinking enough to stop the withdrawals but not enough to actually satisfy me. Just… willpower and distraction. It’s eating me alive.”

Ozpin’s expression grew sad, and he nodded, grasping both of Qrow’s trembling hands. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that it’s so hard. But it will be worth it, and you will survive. I’ve known you long enough to see how strong you are, and you _will_ win.”

“I already gave in once.”

“And that doesn’t mean you’ve failed. How else can you learn but by making mistakes?” He ran his thumbs over Qrow’s knuckles. “You drove here, so I presume you haven’t had a drink today?”

“No, I haven’t.”

“Would it help you to have one?”

“Yeah. I’ve got my flask in the hall. Let me go get it.”

The kettle finished boiling and clicked off, and Qrow left the room to grab his flask out of the pocket of his jacket. He would feel rude asking for anything to mix the whiskey with, so instead he stood there in the hallway and took a sip, forcing himself to put it down when his body instantly started screaming for another. One would do for now. He listened to the sounds of clinking tea cups from the kitchen for a moment and went to return, then paused, his grip tightening on the flask. Slowly, he turned back to his jacket, and replaced the flask in the pocket. So that if he needed it, he had to make the decision to come and get it.

Ozpin set up a similar tea tray to the last one, except that this time there was a saucer full of peppermint creams in the middle instead of cookies. Qrow offered to help, but Ozpin waved him off, and instead had him carry the tray into the living room. He placed it carefully on the coffee table, then copied Ozpin and slumped down on the couch. His hands were still shaking; the cups had rattled the entire way in here. But as they added milk and sugar to their teas and Ozpin shifted to sit closer to him, he at least felt safe.

“You called the doctor on Monday, didn’t you?” Oz checked.

Qrow nodded and leaned back on the couch, leaving his tea on the table. “Yeah, my first appointment’s on Tuesday. I gotta go straight there from this other interview. It’s gonna be a busy day.”

“Of course.” He rested his hand on Qrow’s knee. “But they may be able to begin helping you right away. In many cases, if your symptoms are clear enough, you’ll be prescribed medication in your first appointment. I know I was.”

“Yeah. And then I get shoved on the waiting list for the therapist.”

“Unfortunately, yes, that’s possible. But the wait will be worth it. I promise you that.”

“I know. It’s all just…” Qrow shook his head and rested it on the back of the couch. “Inside I feel really positive, you know, I know things are going well. Better than usual, anyway. But I can’t reach that to be happy, I just feel like shit. In every way.”

“You’re fighting an addiction, Qrow.” Ozpin’s voice was soft and kind. “It’s a physical and mental problem, and you must be using a lot of energy keeping it at bay. Besides which, if you’re mentally unhealthy, a change in circumstances won’t affect a chemical imbalance in your brain. For most people, it takes medication to correct that and even begin the recovery process.”

Qrow nodded and looked up at him. “You know, I’m glad you’re a little more level-headed than I am, Oz. It helps knowing you’re here.”

Ozpin took his hand and squeezed it. “Good. And… I’m glad that _you’re_ here, too. You don’t know how much light you bring into my life.”

He couldn’t resist a smile at that, and he sat up, then practically fell into a reclined position, head in Ozpin’s lap, looking up at him with what he could tell was a goofy smile on his face.

“ _Please_ take your shoes off the couch.” Oz chided.

“Oh. Sorry.” Qrow laughed and removed his boots, then laid down again to see Oz smiling exasperatedly at him. “I’m not used to polite company.”

“Is that what I am? Polite company?”

“Well, something like that. You’re a professor. That’s practically high society.”

Ozpin didn’t reply, just snorted and rested his right hand on Qrow’s chest, his fingers absent-mindedly travelling up to his sternum and fiddling with his necklace through his shirt, running over the shape of the cross. They were silent for a moment, and he seemed to remember himself, moving his hand away suddenly and sliding it up to Qrow’s neck, then further to run his fingers through his hair. A shiver went down Qrow’s spine, and when he looked up he met Ozpin’s eyes and saw warm fondness there that seemed to make the gold glow.

“You know, I’d never have thought you were so affectionate when I first saw you.” Qrow teased.

Ozpin’s fingernails gently brushed his scalp, making his spine tingle more intensely. “Now what on earth does that mean?” He asked, humour in his voice.

“Well, when we first met, I just thought you were… too sophisticated for that. You just seemed kinda untouchable. But then… You weren’t.”

Ozpin smirked and hummed thoughtfully. “I wasn’t aware that was how I came across. But, isn’t the most sophisticated, beautiful thing just to be close to people?”

Qrow raised his eyebrows and laughed. “That’s so cheesy.”

“Yes, well.” His cheeks flushed a little and he smiled wider. “I used to write very amateurish poetry, it still comes out sometimes.”

“You did not.”

“I did. Through my teenage years, mostly, and into my early twenties. I sometimes think of sitting down and really trying it again, but as you say, I’m not very good. It’s hard to find enjoyment in something you aren’t good at and aren’t improving at.”

“That’s crazy, though. Do you still have any of it?”

“Lots. I have many notebooks from that time, all full of awful poems. And before you ask, no, I will _not_ show you. Some things are better left buried.”

Qrow chuckled. “You’re not wrong.” He thought of all of the embarrassing photos of himself and those he’d taken from that age. “So… You’ve always been a hopeless romantic, then?”

Ozpin laughed and moved his hand to rest on Qrow’s chest again. “I’m not sure that’s how I would put it. But if you mean having a tendency to see the best in people, and nothing else… Yes, I suppose I have.”

“Well, I’m glad you saw the best in me. God knows the worst wasn’t much to look at. Still isn’t.”

“No, but everyone has a worse side. And yours is far from the worst I’ve ever endured.”

“Still.” He paused, and placed his hand over Ozpin’s. “It’s real weird to think how long ago that was, you know. You writing poetry.”

“Well, we haven’t actually known one another very long. There’s a lot of buried history in us both.”

“I know, it just… It never occurs to me. It doesn’t seem like we’ve only known each other a few months. I don’t know if that makes sense, but…” He trailed off.

Ozpin nodded. “I understand. The time doesn’t seem to encompass it all.” He frowned slightly, as if thinking, then nudged Qrow in the back with his knee. “Can I please reach my tea?”

Qrow nodded and sat up, dislodging both their hands, and they reached for their teas in tandem. He took a sip of his own, then thoughtfully chewed on a peppermint cream. Ozpin’s leg rested alongside his own, and the faint warmth of his skin through both their clothes was distracting, the feeling like a background noise to his train of thought. The frantic, awful beating of his heart had slowed a little, enough for him to mostly think straight. But there Ozpin was, distracting, disrupting everything the same way. He wanted to be close to him, closer than they were now, closer than they’d ever been. He gritted his teeth against it but the feeling was stubborn and kept floating to the front of his mind.

When Oz put down his cup, he acted, turning to him on the couch and snaking one arm around his waist, the other cradling his jaw as his eyes widened. He reciprocated quickly despite his surprise, and held Qrow’s waist as their lips met. Qrow found himself smiling, his mouth curving into Ozpin’s, leaning in as close as he could in their awkward position. He pulled one knee up onto the couch without breaking off and pushed in further, making Oz lean back a little. They broke off briefly, and he drew in a ragged breath before Qrow gently guided him to lie down on the couch and positioned himself above him to lean in again.

The next kiss was deeper, and Qrow felt his own breathing grow faster and shallower, his heart rate accelerating again. He bit down gently on Ozpin’s lower lip and Oz’s hand went to the back of his head, tangling in his hair. It was warm in here, and he was starting to sweat. His hand was pinning down Ozpin’s waist, and he slowly slid it down, to the waistband of his pants and back up under his shirt to caress the skin beneath.

Ozpin pulled away, turning his head to the side and gasping in a sharp breath. He gripped Qrow’s arm firmly and flinched away a little. “Qrow.” His voice was soft and a little distressed.

Qrow immediately pulled back, removed his wandering hands and sat up, now kneeling on the couch, his eyebrows knitting. “Are you alright?”

He nodded and sat up, then turned to swing his legs back off the couch and pick up his tea. The cup rattled on the saucer. There was a short silence as Qrow watched him take a sip and sigh, sending the steam flying out in a plume over the coffee table.

Tentatively, he reached out a hand and touched Ozpin’s shoulder. “Did I go too far?”

Ozpin shook his head. “I’m just… a little nervous about all of this. I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. I'm not upset.” He moved to rub his back. “Is this about… the asexuality thing?”

“Mostly, yes. I don’t want to lead you on when…” He trailed off, but Qrow knew what he was trying to say.

“Listen, I don’t… I know what you told me the other day, but I’ve never met anyone else who’s asexual before. I guess I don’t really know much about it. Does that mean… You don’t ever have sex?”

Ozpin’s face reddened, but he shook his head. “It’s simply a lack of sexual attraction and libido. I’ve… had intercourse with partners in the past. For their sakes. I simply don’t enjoy the act, but for a partner’s happiness, I can find some appreciation in it.” He looked at Qrow intensely. “It just takes me some time to feel comfortable with it, and with… such kinds of intimacy. I hope you understand.”

Qrow nodded. “I get it. And I’m not trying to push you into anything you’re not comfortable with. I just didn’t know.”

“I didn’t expect you to. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He put down his tea and turned towards Qrow a little more. “There are just boundaries that take time to break.”

“Well, just don’t be scared to let me know when I’m going too far. I promise I’m not offended.”

Ozpin nodded silently, then ducked his head, and Qrow leaned in to tilt his chin up a little.

“I care about you. _All_ of you.” He repeated the words from a week ago. “I’m not worried about this.”

Oz smiled, but his expression was still anxious. “You’re not concerned about… being frustrated?”

“No. If I am, well, that’s my problem, not yours. And anyway, if the docs put me back on anti-depressants, they kill your libido. Maybe I won’t have to think about it.”

He chuckled this time. “Admittedly, that side effect was never really a problem for me.” He rested his hand over Qrow’s on his jaw. “I’m lucky to have you.”

“Yeah you are.” Qrow smirked and kissed him, gently and chastely. “Come on. We’ve got work to do.”

Ozpin nodded, and they separated, finishing their tea in silence.

Eventually, Oz took the tea tray back to the kitchen, leaving the peppermint creams on the coffee table. Qrow helped himself to another one and listened as Ozpin’s footsteps faded down the hall to his office, then returned. He walked back into the living room carrying the notebook he’d shown Qrow last week, and another one that he hadn’t seen before, this one with a lilac cover patterned with black diamonds. He sat down on the couch again and laid them both on the table.

“So now,” He began. “What do we do?” His voice was a little plaintive, and Qrow took his hand.

“What do you have?” He asked.

“Personal details. Evidence of embezzlement that wasn’t enough for her to be convicted before. A lot of photos and journal entries. A few receipts and credit statements. That’s all.”

“Well, I’ve got proof of her tax evasion, and some tentative evidence that she was trying to get me killed. That alone should be enough to scare her. But I’ve also got a good idea of what we should do.”

Ozpin gazed expectantly at him, silent, and squeezed his hand.

Qrow looked down at the two notebooks, Salem’s scratchy handwriting on the card cover of the one he’d seen before, and sighed. “I think I can get the people together like we said, and I think you could help. I can get everyone I worked with: Winter, Amber, An, they’ve all got things to say about Salem too. I could even get James involved; he’s on the city council, he might be able to intimidate her somehow. Hell, maybe even the Belladonnas could help, Ghira’s a councillor too.” He turned back to Oz. “Do you know anyone else who you could ask to back us up?”

“Glynda.” Ozpin said firmly. “We were at college together before we taught at Beacon. She knew Salem almost as well as I did.”

“Great. That’s a good start.” Qrow chewed at his lip, thinking hard. “She’s not gonna make this easy for us. But… maybe numbers will be enough. She’s only one person, and sure she’s got Cinder working there now, but if everyone else is still around, we really can’t lose.”

Ozpin was silent for a long time. “You underestimate her.” He finally said.

Qrow quirked an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“She’s cruel, Qrow. She only cares for her own goals. She… she has lost whatever capacity she used to have for empathy. This is going to be more risky than you can possibly imagine.”

There was a long, tense silence, and Qrow picked up the card-covered notebook with his free hand, refusing to let go of Ozpin with the other. He flicked through a few pages, reading the history of the Found Family non-profit, Oz and Salem’s names joined with a heart on the first page. It made his chest hurt a little, pity and jealously combining in a strange acidic burn. Salem’s name had been angrily struck through in a different pen.

“She’s not all-powerful.” He finally said, tracing his finger over a particularly scratchy paragraph of her handwriting that proclaimed a very vague idea of what the non-profit stood for. “She never got prosecuted, but… You still caught her doing what she did. We both did. And she’s not as smart as she thinks she is. She’s got weaknesses, and I _know_ we can exploit them. Two heads are better than one, and the more we get, the smarter we are, the more opportunities there are for someone to spot any holes in the plan.” Qrow put the notebook down and looked at Oz again. “Let’s _try_. If it doesn’t work, we go to the cops.”

“That’ll only get us into trouble too.”

“It’ll only get _me_ into trouble. I’ll take the fall if necessary.”

“Qrow-”

“Don’t argue. We both know you have a school to run.”

Ozpin was silent again, but nodded.

“Maybe… Maybe I should drop in at the bar sometime next week.” Qrow suggested, pulling the ideas from the top of his head where his thoughts were racing. “I can ask her nicely for my severance check. Maybe she’ll give it to me, maybe she won’t, but either way it’ll give me chance to scope things out, see if she’s got anyone else new working there. And if she won’t give it to me, then that’s just more evidence against her.”

“You’re putting yourself in danger.”

“She can’t do any more to me than she’s already done, not in public.” Qrow squeezed Ozpin’s hand tightly, and turned towards him. “I know this is gonna be bad, Oz. But this is how we’re gonna minimise the damage.”

Ozpin seemed to wilt slightly, and leaned over to rest his head on Qrow’s shoulder. “I’m scared for you. For both of us. But especially you.”

“I know. But think of it like this: We’re gonna walk into that bar with two councillors and one of your fellow teachers, and then three of her employees are gonna turn on her too. Salem is a coward. She can’t stand up to that. Not with the evidence too. She’ll run sooner than fight us.”

“What if she has Tyrian with her?”

“Tyrian’s not as threatening as he seems. He’s bloodthirsty, I won’t deny that, but customers almost called the cops on him the night I got fired. He won’t get away with anything in the bar.” Qrow sighed again and took his hand from Ozpin’s to touch his face. “If you think there’s another way to do this, tell me. I’m not saying you can’t be right. But from what I can tell, it’s this or the cops. What other option do we have?”

Ozpin relaxed into his hand and seemed to steel himself at the same time. “None. You’re right. We can’t let fear control us. A team, if we can truly build one, will be stronger than she could hope to be, and stronger than any Salem could build. Her allies are her allies only for what they get out of the deal.”

Qrow nodded and brushed Ozpin’s hair back off his face. “I’ll talk to Amber, Winter, and An tomorrow. Will you talk to Glynda?”

“Yes.”

“Alright. I’ll get hold of James and Ghira when I have time, but… Look, this is obviously stressing you out. Why don’t we make dinner and get a better plan together later? Maybe it’ll be easier once the wine comes out.”

Ozpin huffed a short laugh and nodded. “Maybe so.” He kissed Qrow’s forehead and held him close for a second. “I’m sorry. I still find her hard to talk about.”

“Don’t apologise.” Qrow said into the crook of his neck. “It’s alright.”

He was almost starting to believe that.


	32. Bold Airs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ozpin and Qrow form their plan against Salem, but anxiety is beginning to rise again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! Somehow I carried this story through into 2019! I apologise if there are any mistakes in this one, I'm dealing with some health issues that are making me tired as hell and I am extremely out of it right now. Also, in getting those issues dealt with, my schedule might get interrupted over the coming weeks. Sorry in advance if that is the case, hopefully I'll be back on form soon!

The bedroom was still dark when Qrow woke up, stirring as the comforter moved and chilly air blew over him. He opened his eyes, groggily squinting up at Ozpin as he tried to get out of bed without disturbing him.

“Sorry.” Oz whispered with a grimace.

“Where are you going?” Qrow asked, voice husky from sleep.

“To take a shower.”

“Why? What time is it?”

“Six-fifteen.”

“What?” Qrow was more awake now, and grabbed Ozpin’s arm. “It’s Saturday. Stay in bed and rest, will you?”

Ozpin rolled his eyes, but smiled. “How very persuasive.”

“Come on. Why don’t you want me to wake up next to you? That’s all I want.”

He didn’t answer, but lay down and flipped the comforter back up over them both.

Qrow moved closer to him and lazily draped an arm across his chest, tucking himself in to block out the cold air. “You seriously get up at 6 am on Saturdays?”

“I get up at 6am _every_ day, Qrow.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“I have work to do.” There was exasperated humour in Ozpin’s voice.

“Don’t we all? I still think you can afford another couple hours in bed.”

“There’s laundry and cleaning to do, I forgot to do the dishes last night, I promised Oscar I would help him with some homework today, and not to mention we need to solidify the details of our plan.”

Qrow sighed. “Yeah, I know.” He shifted to rest his head on Ozpin’s chest. “But an extra hour’s sleep isn’t gonna hurt you. Frankly, I think you need it.”

Ozpin wrapped his arm around him, left hand resting on his ribs. “I suppose you’re right. Maybe I should set a later alarm.” The sound of his voice echoed into Qrow’s ear in a deeper tone.

“Maybe you should just sleep and see when your body wants to wake up. Catch up with yourself a little.”

There was a long pause. “Perhaps.” His conviction sounded weaker now.

“See, I knew you’d come round.”

He chuckled. “You’re interrupting my carefully cultivated routine.”

“Oh, shut up.” Qrow replied without thinking, the way he’d usually reply to James saying something so faux-pretentious, with a grin and an eye roll that were invisible in the dark. For a moment he wondered if he’d spoken too casually, if Oz would be hurt by it.

“You’re lucky I like you.” Ozpin finally grumbled, poking Qrow in the ribs.

He laughed, relieved. “Yeah. I sure am.”

* * *

 

It was past nine when they finally got up; Ozpin was awake first again, but this time he’d stayed in bed. Qrow woke to the sensation of fingers through his hair and opened his eyes to see Oz looking at him like he was still dreaming. They got out of bed, and showered one by one, and Qrow changed into the clean clothes he’d brought with him.

They made breakfast and drinks: green tea for Ozpin, coffee for Qrow, chai for Oscar. Then Ozpin went to help Oscar with his chemistry homework like he’d promised, and Qrow gathered all the dishes from last night and this morning to wash them. Ozpin came back in time to help him put the last few things away, and they went back to the living room.

They relaxed at first, both with legs up on the couch talking about nothing. But Ozpin was anxious about Salem, and he soon turned back to the plan, flicking through the notebooks still left out on the coffee table with a pained expression. Qrow took his hands away and held onto them so that he would stop, and went over the details again. It didn’t seem to help much, so instead he grabbed both notebooks and Ozpin and took him to the dining room, where they laid them both out on the table. They marked several pages that needed to be copied as evidence, and Ozpin found some fresh paper and listed all the people they would contact, and seemed calmer for the action.

The plan didn’t leave their conversation, but Qrow got distracted, sitting adjacent to Ozpin with their knees touching. He had only had two glasses of wine last night, and now as the small amount of alcohol left his system he could feel himself getting fuzzy and jittery again. He was trying to listen as Ozpin spoke, but he kept just watching his lips move instead, and when he finished talking Qrow’s expression was blank. In the moment of silence that followed, he simply did what his instincts asked of him and leaned in.

The day seemed to pass quickly, morning leaking into afternoon as they talked and Qrow helped out with a few chores, and they sometimes paused to kiss wherever there was space and privacy, almost always touching in one way or another. He did his best to keep making Ozpin laugh, to take his mind off the trouble that was coming. He was right that it was going to be difficult, but they would struggle no matter what happened. Better not to think about it anymore until it was really necessary.

By the time Qrow had to leave to be home by three as he’d promised, Ozpin seemed to be levelling out, laughing the way he had in the dark that morning. Qrow was glad to see it, but worried he’d only go back to his anxiety when he left.

“Keep talking to me, won’t you?” He said as he swung on his jacket, his flask bumping his abdomen with a slosh. He ignored the pang of cravings it gave him. “And remember to talk to Glynda, too.”

“I will.” Ozpin nodded.

Qrow hesitated, hand hovering over Ozpin’s black scarf and then moving away without taking it. He turned back to Oz and spotted his cane leaning on the wall behind him, where it had been when he’d arrived the night before. He faltered again, looking between it and its owner for a moment.

“Before I go,” He began awkwardly. “Can I ask you a question?”

Ozpin turned to see what he was looking at, and smiled. “Yes. It’s about the cane, isn’t it?”

“Yeah. Why do you…?” He waved a hand vaguely at it.

“It’s an affectation.” He picked it up and ran a thumb over the delicate filigree on the handle. His gaze fixed on it, his smile fading slightly. “I had an injury and subsequent surgery that required me to use it, for a while. A long time ago. But when I no longer needed it, I continued to carry it. It brought me a… strange sort of comfort. A security blanket, if you will. A very literal crutch.” He chuckled, and put the cane back where he’d taken it from. “Now it’s just something I like to have with me. It’s become a part of me.”

Qrow smiled and tilted his head. “But why do you sometimes leave it behind?”

“I leave it behind when I feel safe. Which is why you in particular have seen me without it so often.”

A wave of shock flooded through Qrow’s body, and he drew back a little.

Ozpin laughed at his wide eyes. “You told me that you feel safe with me. Why are you surprised that the feeling is mutual?”

“I… I don’t know! I just… never thought of it like that.”

“Everyone needs safety and security. You have been… Very good at addressing my fears today. I’m grateful.”

Qrow collected himself and nodded, then stepped forward to hug him in what he hoped was a comforting manner. Ozpin’s shoulders relaxed, and he held Qrow just as tightly, leaning down to kiss the point of his jaw and rest his head on his shoulder.

“We’re gonna be fine.” Qrow said quietly.

“I hope you’re right.” Ozpin whispered. “What are we going to do if-”

“Nope. No what ifs. Neither of us need to be worrying about what might be.” He pulled away. “Whatever it is, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. And burn it behind us if necessary.”

“How very poetic.” He didn’t smile.

“Listen.” Qrow placed his left hand on Ozpin’s face and made him look him in the eye. “You’ve talked me out of this kind of thing, so now let me do the same for you. Would you still be so worried about her if you hadn’t dated her?”

“I don’t know what you mean.” He placed a hand on Qrow’s forearm.

“I mean, if it wasn’t personal, and she was just my shitty boss, would you still be so nervous?”

“Well… I suppose not. But she’s still turned to violence. There are still good reasons to be scared.”

“Sure. I’m not saying we shouldn’t be careful.” He sighed. “But what happened between you two was a long time ago, and she’s never tried anything even though she’s been around you. Only when you were alone, and she’s _not_ gonna be alone with you during this. She’s not gonna be alone with any of us. That’s the whole point.”

Ozpin grasped his forearm tighter for a moment, then dropped his hand, prompting Qrow to do the same. “Yes. I suppose that’s true. She won’t be able to truly harm anyone without ultimately making things worse for herself.”

“Exactly. And if she does target anyone, there’s enough of us to overpower her.”

“Providing we can get everyone we want involved.”

“Which we can. As long as we get them involved sooner rather than later.”

“Right. You’re right.”

“I’m not saying this is gonna go off without a hitch, but we’re prepared enough to make it work. You really don’t need to worry.”

“Then… I’ll do my best not to.” He smiled, small and hopeful, and stepped closer to Qrow again.

They shared one last kiss in the dim hallway, and Ozpin’s hand was cold on his neck tilting up his jaw, and Qrow gripped the back of his shirt tightly for a moment, and then it was over. They touched their foreheads together and Ozpin slid his hand down to rest over Qrow’s heart.

“Stay safe.” He murmured.

“I will. You take care of yourself. Keep yourself distracted if you have to.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“Good.” Qrow’s mind instinctively took another step, words he wasn’t sure he should say yet teetering on the tip of his tongue before he managed to swallow them. “I… I’ll be back.”

Ozpin smirked. “I should hope so.”

They reluctantly separated, and Qrow picked up his overnight bag and walked out of the house. Ozpin waited in the doorway as he tossed his stuff into the car and started the engine. Qrow could see him shivering from here; he wasn’t wearing a jacket. Finally, he backed out of the driveway, waved back at Oz, and drove away down the street with a glance at the rear-view mirror to see the door closing as it shrank into the distance.

* * *

 

When Qrow got back to the apartment building, he paused in the parking lot to take a sip of whiskey before he went upstairs. He would have rather mixed it, the way he’d been building up the habit of doing, but he was expecting the kids’ friends to be there. It wouldn’t look good to make a mid-afternoon drink in front of them. When his throat and stomach were burning adequately, he got out of the car, grabbed his bag, and headed inside with his flask still clutched in his hand.

He unlocked the apartment door clumsily and made his way in, dropping the flask on the laminate with a clatter.

“Uncle Qrow?” Ruby’s raised voice came from the living room.

“Yeah, it’s me!” He shouted back. “Be with you in a minute.” He picked up his flask, went to his bedroom, and left it on the nightstand. Then he hung up his jacket, emptied yesterday’s clothes out of the overnight bag, and dumped them in the laundry hamper in the hall.

When he entered the living room, Yang and Blake were sitting on the couch, the cushion between them covered in abandoned playing cards. The coffee table had been pushed back, and Ruby and Weiss sat cross-legged on the floor, more cards scattered between them. All four of them looked up as he walked in. Ruby and Yang grinned, and Blake gave an awkward half-smile. Weiss just watched him curiously.

“Hey.” He said, and picked his way around the table to get to the kitchenette. “Everyone doing alright?”

“Yeah, we’re great.” Yang answered for everyone.

“Good. Everyone sleep okay? Have you all eaten?” He turned to see them all nodding. “Good.”

“How was your date?” She smirked.

Qrow turned from getting a glass out of the cupboard and gave her a deadpan stare. “Great, thanks.” He poured himself some water and made his way back to the armchair, sitting heavily.

Weiss, sitting closest to him, gave him a wary look.

“Oh.” He remembered himself and sat up a little straighter to talk to her. “We’ve not met before. You’re Weiss, aren’t you?”

Her eyebrows raised, but she nodded. “I am. And you’re Qrow.”

“That’s me. Nice to finally meet you.”

“You too. I’ve… heard a lot about you.” A strange expression crossed her face.

“Uh… Good stuff, I hope?”

“We always say good stuff about you!” Ruby piped up. “Don’t we?”

Yang, shuffling cards into a pile, paused and shrugged. “Well…”

“Not from you two!” Weiss said. “From my sister.”

“Oh.” Qrow didn’t know whether to feel relieved or not. “Yeah, Winter and I used to work together.”

“Used to?” Blake asked. “You don’t work at the bar anymore?”

“No, I-”

“He got fired.” Weiss and Yang said in unison.

There was a short, awkward silence, and Qrow looked down at Weiss with a frown. “So, what’s your sister say about me?”

She looked away from him and became suddenly interested in her fingernails. “Well… She said that you were a fair boss, and you worked hard.”

“And?”

“And… That you’re moody and drunk all the time.”

Ruby gave an outraged exclamation, and Yang laughed.

Qrow couldn’t suppress his own smirk. “That’s almost a glowing review from her. I’ll take it.”

“Uncle Qrow isn’t moody!” Ruby waved her arms wildly. “He’s the best!”

“You are kidding, right?” Yang had humour in her voice. “He’s so grouchy!”

“Aw, come on. You’re picking on me.” Qrow grumbled.

“Do you remember last month when I beat you at that fighting game and you sulked all afternoon?”

“Yeah, well that’s just cause I’m so used to beating you it came as a surprise.”

“Ouch, low blow.”

“You only won because you distracted him!” Ruby said accusingly.

“He does the same to me.” Yang replied, and got down off the couch to pick up the rest of the cards. “It’s only fair.”

“You do it to me when we play, too.”

“Yeah, but I just do it to you for fun. You’re so terrible I don’t really need to.”

Ruby lunged playfully at Yang, and the cards scattered all over the floor again as they play-fought, wrestling each other with socked feet slipping on the laminate. There was a series of yelps and giggles.

Blake placed her chin in her hand and watched impassively. “This is just like when we met.” She sighed.

Weiss dodged a stray elbow and shook her head with a smile. “Dolts.”

Yang fell back against the coffee table, pushing it even further out of line and rattling the collection of dirty mugs that were gathered on it.

“Alright, hey!” Qrow raised his voice a little. “That’s enough.”

Yang stood up, rubbing her shoulder and grinning sheepishly. Blake rolled her eyes as she sat down again and Ruby got up from where Yang had pushed her face down on the floor.

“So, do you two know how you’re getting home?” He asked of Blake and Weiss.

“My dad’s picking me up at four.” Weiss replied, almost grimacing.

Her words made Qrow think of his discussion with Ozpin earlier, the little list of people he needed to contact. He turned to Blake. “Is your dad picking you up, too?”

She looked surprised to have been asked. “Uh, no, my mom’s coming. Why?”

“Oh, it’s…” He waved a hand, realising he was probably coming off strange. “Don’t worry about it. I need to talk to him, but I can contact him myself.”

“Oh. Do you mind if I ask why?”

He sighed, and when he looked up all four girls were staring at him, expectant and wary. Instead of answering right away, he took a sip of his water and placed the glass carefully on the floor, and leaned forward in his seat with elbows on his knees.

“I guess it doesn’t really matter if you know. It isn’t gonna affect you, but it’ll involve your relatives.” He struggled for words for what was going on. “My old boss at the bar, Winter’s boss now, she… She’s breaking the law. She has been for a long time. We’re getting together all the evidence we can to… get her out of Vale, basically. So I’m gonna talk to Winter, and Amber and An who I worked with too, and see if they’re willing to help, or if they have anything that counts against her.”

There was a short silence as they digested the information, then Blake tilted her head. “So, what does my dad have to do with this?”

“Your dad’s on the city council. If he’s willing, he’s going to act as intimidation to get her to admit what she’s been doing. My friend James is a councillor too, he’ll be there for the same reason.”

“And… You think the police will believe it if she confesses under duress like that?”

“The cops aren’t gonna be involved.” He shook his head and looked away from her cautious amber gaze. “Look, this stuff doesn’t matter to any of you, but I wanted you to be informed. It’s too dangerous for you to get involved, but-”

“What are you actually going to do?” Weiss demanded. “Why do you need intimidation tactics to collect evidence against someone?”

He sighed. “The evidence is to take back to the bar and show her. We’re trying to scare her out of town. That’s what the councillors are for. We think if we show up with enough proof, enough unfriendly faces, and enough threats, she might think she’s safer elsewhere.”

“Who’s ‘we’?”

Qrow grimaced at the question he’d known was inevitable. “Me and Professor Ozpin.”

“Ozpin?” Blake asked. “Beacon principal Ozpin?”

“Well, what other Ozpin is there?”

“What does _he_ have to do with this?”

“He’s got history with Salem; that’s not my story to tell.” He shook off his impatience and steadied himself. “Anyway, none of this important right now. You just need to know what’s going on if your dad and Winter get all secretive.” He looked over at Ruby and Yang. “And if I start disappearing.”

“This is insane.” Yang intoned. “You’re either gonna get yourself arrested, or her arrested and yourself _killed_.”

He deflated somewhat. “Yeah. That’s sorta what we’re worried about. But that’s why we’re doing this in a group. The more of us there are, the less likely any of us gets singled out, and the more likely Salem backs down.”

“I mean… Teamwork makes the dream work?” Ruby hazarded with a shrug.

The tension broke, and the other girls laughed quietly.

“Yeah, I admire your optimism, kid.” Qrow smiled.

Yang shook her head. “I still think you’re crazy. And Ozpin too. But if you really think it’ll work, sure. Just keep us updated.”

“All of us.” Weiss put in. “I’d like to know my sister’s safe.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll make sure you all know what’s going on. Just don’t say a single word about this at school, okay? Not to anyone. In fact, don’t let it leave this room.”

“We can keep a secret.” Blake assured him.

He nodded. “Then I’ll trust you with it.”


	33. The Wind Picks Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow starts contacting friends to help him against Salem, but Ruby and Yang have something to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I'm still sick and haven't had a decent night's sleep since before the holidays but this would be a damn awful place to leave you on a cliffhanger, wouldn't it? Let's keep going!

Qrow delayed a lot before finally trying to contact Amber and Winter on Sunday. Although it was something that needed to be done, something crucial, he felt awkward. He didn’t like work friendships continuing to exist outside work, and on principle, contacting two women he didn’t even work with anymore felt weird. Sure, they all got on, to a point, but he didn’t speak to them outside work unless absolutely necessary. The only reason Qrow had their numbers was to settle schedule disputes without involving Salem.

He knew that this was more important than his own social inadequacy, though, and in the afternoon, he texted them both. A brief summary of what got him fired, what he’d found in Salem’s office, and a simplified rundown of the plan.

He finished with: ‘ **Are you in?** ’

Winter replied for them both. ‘ _We’re in._ ’

Qrow moved on to try to contact An, a knot of nerves forming in the pit of his stomach. He hadn’t needed to text her in several months, and after their confrontation behind the bar at the start of the month, he doubted she would want to hear from him. It needed to be done, so he started casual, asked her how she was doing and what things at the bar were like without him. It took over an hour for a reply to come through.

‘ _Wrong number? This isn’t An._ ’

Qrow paused in his fidgety worry to run a hand through his hair in despair. She must have changed her number since they’d last contacted each other and not told him. He apologised to his mistaken conversation partner and deleted the number, then sat back on the couch running through his options. He could go into the bar and talk to her, but not without raising the suspicions of Salem and Cinder. His only other choice would be to go through her kid, and therefore Ruby and Yang.

He grimaced at the thought of getting them any more involved than they already were, but resigned himself to it. Once, there might have been many paths he could have followed, a maze to navigate. Now there was a single track to get where he was going, one he was following a step at a time, getting closer and closer to this end goal of confrontation. He suddenly realised that, deep down, he was terrified, but he pushed it back and stood up.

He knocked on the girls’ bedroom door; they’d been shut away doing homework for most of the day, but going by the music he could hear from behind the door, they had finished. The music shut off suddenly, and Yang opened the door.

“Hey.” She gave him a wary frown. There was a pencil tucked behind her left ear. “Are we being too loud?”

“No, no, it’s fine.” He shifted nervously. “Can I come in? I wanna ask you two a favour.”

“I guess.” She stepped aside and went back to her seat at the desk.

Qrow walked into the room, taking in the pile of clothes in the corner, Ruby sitting cross-legged on the single bed with her laptop in her lap. She looked up from the screen and tilted her head as he took a seat at the edge of the other bed.

“What kind of favour do you need?” She asked, putting it aside.

He sighed. “It’s nothing too big, it’s just… related to this thing with my old boss.”

“You want us to help?” Yang asked, an almost hopeful tone in her voice.

“Not with that. I just need you to help me get in contact with someone. Your friend… You call him Ren, don’t you?”

“ _Everyone_ calls him Ren.”

“Yeah, well, I need to get in contact with his mom, An. She’s changed her number, but I wanna see if she’ll help us out against Salem. I’m not sure she will, but it’s worth a try.”

“Okay.” Ruby said. “So you want us to tell him to tell her to talk to you?” She looked confused by her own words.

“Yeah, and give him my number in case An doesn’t have it anymore. I don’t know how long it’s been since she changed.”

“When do you need to talk to her by?”

“As soon as possible. Get it to him tomorrow if you can.”

“What’s so urgent?” Yang asked. “If you’re not even sure she’s gonna help, why are you so worried?”

Qrow faltered, and frowned. “She… She worked with me the most closely. She witnessed some of the shit that went down, she got mistreated by Cinder and Salem herself, and she’s got evidence. She could really help us.”

She nodded silently, expression unreadable.

“So… Can you do that? Write it down, or… Make sure you remember somehow. We’ve got a lot of work to do, I wanna speak to her tomorrow if I can.”

“We’ll remember, Uncle Qrow.” Ruby said with conviction. “You don’t need to worry.”

“I wish that were true.” He grumbled, and stood up. He did feel a little stupid for the anxiety that was coming out of him, the snippy urgency in his words. It was irritating to feel this much, and he was sure the lack of alcohol in his system was only making it worse. He had a pang of cravings at the thought, and he clenched his fists as he went to walk out of the room.

“Wait!” Yang exclaimed.

He paused by the door, one hand on the frame, and didn’t turn as he spoke. “What?”

There was a long silence, stiff and awkward as no one seemed to know what to say. Finally, there was a heavy sigh from the bed.

“We want to help you.” Ruby said quietly.

Qrow’s blood ran cold. This was what he’d been afraid of: Two brave, spirited kids deciding to get involved in adult business that would hurt everyone if it went wrong. He took a deep breath and exhaled it shakily.

“No.” He replied.

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want you to get hurt.” He turned back to face them, to find Ruby now frowning deeply, Yang sitting with her arms folded and a studying expression.

“We’re gonna get hurt if it goes wrong no matter what.” Yang shrugged. “You get hurt, we get hurt. That’s how it works. So what’s the difference?”

“That’s not…” Qrow gritted his teeth. “Look, you having to… deal with me is not the same as you actually getting physically hurt. And you both know that. Your dad-”

“To hell with Dad!” Yang stood up. “He isn’t here! You know he’d kill you if he heard about this whether we were involved or not, so don’t use him as an excuse.” She paused and sighed. “I don’t want to see _anyone_ get hurt, but like you said, there’s safety in numbers. Four more people on your side can’t hurt.”

“Four?”

“Weiss and Blake want to help too.” Ruby said firmly. “Weiss wants to watch over Winter, Blake wants to watch over her dad. And we want to make sure our Uncle Qrow is okay.”

Qrow squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and frowned, agonised. There was no completely correct answer to be found, but he knew there was a wrong answer in shutting his nieces out yet again.

When he spoke, his voice was strained. “Fine. You can help. I don’t know exactly what you can do, but you’re right: The bigger the group, the safer we are. You’ll have to come to Ozpin’s house on Wednesday night when we all meet up to get the plan together. A couple of your teachers will be there. Not a _single_ word about this at school, do you understand? Not even to Weiss and Blake.”

“Fine.” Yang nodded. “Does Oscar know about this?”

“I don’t think there’s any way he can’t know.”

“So what do we need to do? To prepare or whatever?” Ruby asked.

“Well… There’s one more thing you could do.” Qrow set his jaw as they watched him. “If Blake’s involved, ask her to give me her dad’s number. I need to talk to him. I’ll take the rest from there.” He relaxed slightly as they nodded. “Alright. Tomorrow I’m going back to the bar to see what’s up. We’re probably doing this on Saturday. Just… don’t do anything stupid in the meantime.”

“We won’t let you down.”

* * *

 

Ruby and Yang did as Qrow had asked them, reporting back to him on Monday evening with Ghira’s contact details, and the news that An had his number and would talk to him when she finished work. He expected to get a text after nine when The Gold Bar kitchen closed, but instead his phone rang at six-thirty. He took his keys and left the apartment, sitting at the top of the stairwell as he answered.

“Hello?”

“Hello, Qrow. It’s An.” Her voice was hesitant; she didn’t sound like she wanted to talk.

“Hey, how are you doing?”

“Fine, all things considered. What did you want to talk to me about? It must be fairly urgent.”

“Well, yeah, it is. Uh…” He collected his thoughts and got right to the subject at hand. “Listen, you know why I got fired, don’t you?”

“For refusing to serve any customers, or so Salem told me.”

He grimaced. “Specifically for not serving the guy who stabbed me out back, yeah. Anyway, to make a long story short, she fired me wrongfully, and I’ve got evidence that she’s been stealing money from the bar. I’m… building up a case against her, trying to collect more evidence from more people. I know she fucked with you too. I wondered if you could help.”

There was a long pause, and An sighed. “Qrow, I’m not working at the bar anymore. I found a new job, and as soon as I put in my notice Salem stopped scheduling me, so I just stopped going in. I was barely there long enough to hear about what you did. I don’t have access to my employee file. Whatever evidence there might have been is probably gone now.”

“It doesn’t matter.” He pressed. “Look, we’re trying to scare her. It doesn’t matter if we have the physical evidence, we can find it somehow, I know she keeps copies of everything. We just need as many people behind us as possible. You can get something out of this. Let me guess, Salem never got your last pay check to you, did she?”

“That isn’t the point. As much as I’d like to help, I’m not going to put myself in that situation again. And I would have thought that you of all people would know better, too.”

“An-”

“I am done dealing with Salem. I have a new job, with better hours, better pay, and a boss who doesn’t spend all her time breathing down my neck. And a manager who doesn’t drink on the job.”

Qrow physically winced at the sharp tone in her voice, but she wasn’t finished.

“If you can somehow extract my missing pay from her, great. I’ll be very thankful. If not, fine. But it isn’t worth my time, energy, or health to go chasing it myself. I’m genuinely sorry. I just can’t put myself at risk like that.”

“No. No, I understand. I’m… sorry I bothered you about it.”

An’s tone softened. “It’s alright. Just… don’t contact me about her again unless she gets arrested. If I have to testify against her in court, I will. But that’s _all_ I’m going to do.”

“Fine. Uh… I guess I’ll go then. Good luck with your new job.”

“Thank you.” There was a long pause. “Good luck to you too. It sounds like you need it.”

The line went dead, and Qrow put down his phone before he could hear the beeping tone that showed she’d hung up. He pressed a hand to his face in frustration and sighed deeply. An made one less person to stand against Salem. He wasn’t particularly surprised that she’d turned him down, though he hadn’t expected her to have completely moved on so quickly. Still, he had other people to contact. He picked up his phone again and dialled the number that Ruby and Yang had given him first. Perhaps two city councillors would make up for his missing colleague.

* * *

 

Qrow was relieved to find both Ghira and James ready and willing to help him out against Salem, though Ghira didn’t yet seem aware that his daughter was involved. They both asked a lot of questions, and by the time he had finished explaining the rough plan twice, it was past eight. Still, they had both agreed to meet at Ozpin’s house on Wednesday night, so he texted Oz with the news as he headed back into the apartment, where Ruby and Yang were waiting in the living room. At the sight of them, he sent a second message, to tell Ozpin that the kids were involved too. He got the feeling he wouldn’t be too happy to hear it.

“How’d it go?” Ruby asked, expression nervous.

Qrow shrugged. “An isn’t gonna help. James and Ghira are.”

“Well, that’s net positive.” Yang mused. “Who else is there?”

“Oz is gonna try and get at least one of your teachers involved. Glynda, he said.”

“Ms. Goodwitch? How does she know Salem?”

“They went to college together or something.” Qrow realised his hands were trembling and headed to the kitchenette to pour a drink. He hadn’t had one for several hours.

“So… with you and Professor Ozpin, that’s… eleven people. Twelve including Oscar. That’s a lot.”

“Yeah. But An said something that worried me.” He topped up a measure of whiskey with apple juice and put the carton back into the fridge. “She’s quit working at the bar. She said as soon as she put her notice in, Salem stopped scheduling her. Which means she had to have someone else available to replace her right away. She must have replaced me behind the bar too, there’s no way Salem would work my shifts for more than a few days.”

“So maybe Salem has more people on her side than we know.” Ruby intoned.

“Exactly.” He sipped his drink and leaned on the counter. “I’m gonna head up to the bar after the kitchen closes and see if she’s there. And see who else is there. At this time of night, Cinder should have gone home and whoever replaced me will be behind the bar.”

“Should we come with you?”

“No. I don’t want her to know there’s anyone else on my side until the time’s right. Not even you two.”

“Why, you think we’re gonna blow your cover?” Yang asked sceptically.

“I want her to underestimate me.” Qrow said. “If she has time to prepare, then we’re fucked.”

* * *

 

He left the apartment at nine, with nothing on him but his keys and phone. The walk to The Gold Bar was pleasantly easy, familiar in the quiet night air. His heart ached a little; he did miss the place. But he missed the days when Salem had come in maybe once a month and left him to do most of the work, when he’d had time and peace to chat to the customers. He missed what the bar had been, not what it had become.

The place was quiet when he walked in, though he spotted a few familiar faces in the Monday evening crowd. He felt self-conscious, but no one turned to look at him. Instead, he focused on the bar, where an exceptionally tall, broad-shouldered man straightened up to his full height. Qrow’s stomach turned, but he made his way up to the bar, stood between the two stools in front of the register.

“Evening, Hazel.” He said steadily.

Hazel looked impassively at him. “Good evening. I’m not sure you’re supposed to be here.”

“Maybe not. Is Salem in?”

“She’s in her office.”

“Would you do me a favour and go get her? I need to talk to her.”

“Not buying a drink?”

“Not today.”

There was a long pause, but Hazel nodded and warily left his place behind the bar. Qrow stayed where he was, turned to see the door to the side room and leaned one elbow on the counter. It wasn’t long before Hazel returned, an irate-looking Salem in tow.

He hadn’t seen her since the revelation of the history she and Ozpin shared, and for a moment he was struck with a fiery mixture of jealousy, bitterness, anger, and fear. He could see how she had been beautiful, once, when perhaps she had carried herself a little more casually, when maybe every word in her voice hadn’t been laced with venom. But the anger was strongest as he remembered what Ozpin had said, and what Qrow knew she’d done. He wondered how many other people she’d manipulated they simply didn’t know about.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, a hard undertone to her lowered voice. “You’re banned from these premises.”

“Oh. That’s news to me.” Qrow forced himself to remain casual. “But I’m not here to cause trouble.”

“Then what _are_ you here for? I can’t see any good reason for you to be present.”

“Actually, I came to ask for something.” He paused as Hazel got back behind the bar and went back to wiping a glass, clearly listening. “I’d like my severance check, please.”

Salem quirked an eyebrow, her expression otherwise unchanging. “And you think that coming here to beg for it is going to make it reach you faster?”

“I didn’t beg. I asked nicely.” His heart was pounding in his chest, but he kept his voice low.

“Regardless, I have a lot of paperwork to do. I assure you, your severance is not at the top of my list of priorities. Besides, there is no law in this state that says I _must_ provide you severance.”

“No, but it does say that in the employment contract I signed when I started working here.” He smirked. “Bet the last owner of this place put that one in, huh?”

Her scowl grew deeper, and she walked towards him, until they were glaring at each other over less than a metre. “You really do pride yourself on paying attention to things that don’t concern you, don’t you?”

Qrow shrugged and looked away from her eyes. “It’s good to know your rights. And I have a right to that money.”

“I owe you nothing.”

He laughed mirthlessly. “Bullshit. And you know what, you owe some other people, too. Remember An? Remember how she never got her last pay check? Severance is one thing. Wage theft… That could get you into a lot of trouble.”

She moved forward again, rounding the chairs so that she could get right into his face, forcing him to lean back on the counter. He could feel her heavy breath as she gritted her teeth. She clenched her fists and for a moment he thought she might hit him. Then she backed away slightly and turned her head.

“Leave.” She pointed at the door. “Or I will have you removed.”

Qrow glanced back at Hazel, whose bulky forearms bulged against the rolled-up sleeves of his jacket. He nodded. “Alright. But listen, if that money never shows up… It’s not gonna go well for you.”

“And how do you think it will go for you?” She smirked. “I’d be fascinated to see what you and this town’s pathetic police department think you can do.”

“Yeah. I guess you’re a one woman army, huh?”

She didn’t reply, and he edged around her away from the bar, avoiding the eyes of the few customers who had noticed what was going on and turned to look.

“Have a great week.” He said as he left, glancing back as the door closed behind him to see Hazel start to say something to Salem. Through the glass he saw her turn on her heel and address him.

His heart beat frantically as he walked home, anxiety building in his stomach. Hazel working at the bar was a dangerous obstacle; even eleven of them might not be enough if he decided to get physical. If Cinder was present, and she probably would be, he knew she would go to any lengths, whether for Salem or out of pride, it didn’t matter. And there was always the terrifying possibility that Tyrian might turn up. He had an image of a knife twirling between fingers and wanted to throw up.

But beneath his fear, he felt a sense of relief. Salem had not looked worried at any point, but she clearly didn’t completely understand his motivations. He had riled her with his calm attitude, even as put-on as it had been. And while he was worried about Hazel’s strength, this and their previous encounter suggested he was difficult to provoke. He wondered if they could talk him around to their side, but that was a very tentative possibility. For now, he would report back to Ozpin with his findings. On Wednesday, they would plan the details. But he had a job interview and a doctor’s appointment tomorrow. Salem would have to take a back seat for a while.


	34. The Calm Before the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow tries to get his stability back, but Salem must be tackled, and they can't go in without a plan. Warning: discussion of past abusive relationship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As several people have commented, the tension is rising. I hope you all are excited to see it through as I am! In the meantime, this chapter contains some bluffing about criminal law and I'd like to apologise in advance.

_The Gold Bar was on fire, flames engulfing the hardwood floors and fixtures, curling up the wallpaper in the main room and licking the upholstery in the booths. He stood in the middle of it, calm and still despite the heat and the thunderous roar that was getting closer to him. Across the room, Salem was behind the bar, equally as impassive, her eyes glowing the same searing red as the flames that were creeping along the countertop. She snapped her fingers and every line of fire changed direction, converging painlessly at Qrow’s feet._

_He said something, but the words were distorted, barely more than a sigh in the cacophony. There was a bucket of clear liquid in his hands, and he made to put the fire out. The liquid sprayed in a vast arc over the whole room, raining down from above onto him, and the fumes caught, fumes he couldn’t smell but suddenly knew were of gasoline, and the fire stoked and swelled as Salem smirked._

* * *

 

Qrow jolted awake almost feeling he could still see the afterimages of the flames, superimposed in blue on his eyelids when he blinked. Words popped into his head without him really thinking.

“Playing with fire.” He muttered to himself, and covered his face with his hands as the permanent knot of anxiety in his stomach seemed to tighten a little further. Salem had looked so monstrous in the nightmare. He wondered how Ozpin was coping: if Qrow was this worried, Oz must surely have been struggling. He sent him a quick message to say good morning and see how he was, then got up. His interview was in an hour; he needed to get the day started and his thoughts off the bar.

He chewed on the inside of his lip on the drive to the Italian restaurant whose manager was looking for another line cook. Putting more stress on himself was not helping, but he knew he needed a new job. And if he’d been wrong about The Albatross, for now, this was his only other choice. He continued to chew his lip as he waited outside the back office for the manager to turn up, then moved on to biting his nails. His mind was more on Salem than the fact that his interviewers were fifteen minutes late, and he couldn’t bring himself to smile as he introduced himself when they finally arrived.

It was a toil: The owner and manager seemed more interested in hearing one another’s dumb jokes than Qrow’s answers to their questions. He found his scowl getting deeper and deeper throughout the interview, clenching his hands into frustrated fists in his lap. The chair on his side of the desk was too small for an adult, and looking up at the two proud, pudgy faces on the other side got more infuriating by the second. When the time came for him to ask questions of them, he declined, wanting it over with as soon as possible. It was mentioned that if they offered him the job, he’d have to go through a ‘kitchen training refresher’ with the head chef.

“Yeah. Sure.” Qrow muttered.

He got out of there as quickly as possible, amazed that only twenty minutes had passed in the small office. It had felt like an hour. His mood only soured further as he got back into his car and turned on the air to clear the windshield. He knew working for a manager so self-interested he couldn’t even show up on time for an interview he was conducting would be torture, even without the everyday struggle of kitchen work. But what pissed him off the most was the knowledge that this was _normal_.

Salem was a terrible manager and a terrible person, and deep down, Qrow had known that there were many people like her in the world. He had just hoped that he wouldn’t encounter any more of them here in Vale. But with the restaurant now out of his mind as even an option, he wondered if whatever this was- Narcissism, lack of concern for anyone but oneself, whatever you called it- was just a managerial trait. If he was lucky he hadn’t encountered it more. If he was lucky not to have developed it himself.

His nerves didn’t ease as he made his way to the clinic, but cooled like wrought iron quenched in water, the red-hot edge of anger fading into fear. The last time he’d had any contact with a medical professional was getting his stitches out four months ago. Before that, it had been a couple of years. Rationally, he knew people got treated for depression all the time, that Ozpin was right, it was just a case of pills and therapy and patience and hard work. But there was some voice in the back of his mind that came from twenty years ago and said they’d think he was crazy and shut him away and bad things would happen to him.

He’d been through all this before, though; last time they’d just given him citalopram and told him to come back in four weeks, and he hadn’t. He parked outside the clinic and took the little flattened box out of the glove compartment, put it into his pocket ready to show the doctor, and sighed at his own faint reflection in the windshield. It took him a lot of willpower to get out of the car. Walking into the quiet waiting room made him feel like everyone could hear his heartbeat, all the older people and the parents with whimpering kids, coughing yuppies and the receptionist with a glare like being doused with ice water. He sat down and waited and bit his nails again.

The doctor, it turned out, was a southern-accented lady with a kind smile and a business-like attitude. Qrow crept into her office like a dog with his tail between his legs, but she quickly put him at ease. She had no prior feelings about him, and any assumptions she made were kept to herself. She simply listened and nodded, looked carefully at the citalopram box he handed her, and agreed to refer him to the therapist he suggested. The waiting list was a month, she said, but in the meantime, medication might start to help.

She sent him off with a referral and a promise that the therapist’s office would contact him to set up an appointment, and also with a prescription for a different antidepressant, at a low dose to see how he reacted to it. This time, before he left, he set up his four-week appointment with the stone-faced receptionist, then headed next door to the pharmacy to pick up his pills. The doctor had warned him that he shouldn’t drink on them, and he resolved himself to check online whether that might just mean ‘drink carefully’ as soon as he got home. In the meantime, today’s responsibilities had been cleared. He would start taking the medication tomorrow. In the meantime, he needed that drink more than anything else on earth.

* * *

 

The day passed with the sluggish fury of a freight train, Tuesday crashing into the early hours of Wednesday and Qrow left struggling to sleep. He found his mind fixated on Salem and Ozpin in equal measure, thoughts jumping back and forth between them all night. He had had a tense, anxious conversation with Ozpin before bed that suggested neither of them had as much faith in their vague plan as they’d made out. Knowing that there was no great hero to save them, and that this could hurt them as much as Salem, had him worried for everyone involved. He was starting to wish he’d never told anyone but Ozpin.

Qrow got a fitful few hours’ sleep, and spent most of Wednesday restlessly pacing the apartment while he tried to prepare for the meeting that night. He was sure there was no magical combination of words that would make them all believe in him, make them brave, whatever he needed. But all the possibilities were buzzing around his head and he muttered them to himself as he backed up the photos of Salem’s doctored register tallies. He read through the email for what felt like the fiftieth time as he took a screenshot of it, backed that up, and forwarded it to a spare email account, thinking about Hazel behind the bar with a wave of cold terror.

By the time Ruby and Yang came home, he had chewed his nails down to the quick, torn off every hangnail, and clenched his teeth so hard it gave him headache. The stress had intensified his desperation for a drink, and now it was like a weight in his head, as though someone had inflated the feeling in his brain so it was all he could think about. His hands itched, and all that helped were the muscle memory exercises he’d been doing, compulsively miming unscrewing his flask every few minutes.

They had a quick dinner, and hung around for a few hours: Ozpin had asked them all up to the house at nine, after Winter and Amber finished work. The wait seemed to last longer than the rest of the day had so far, as Qrow stared at his phone and watched the minutes tick up and the battery tick down. He was glad when it was time for them to leave, gathering Ruby and Yang, who had adopted similar anxious expressions to his own. He wasn’t surprised: They must have been able to feel it in the atmosphere, the dread that he was radiating into the air.

They walked up to the house, and Qrow caught the girls looking around, fascinated, as they entered the neighbourhood. He didn’t pause or slow his pace, and they were silent as he led the way to Ozpin’s house. The green sedan had been joined in the driveway by a white SUV and a large black truck; James and Ghira were already here. A quiet conversation was audible from inside as they walked up to the front door. Qrow knocked, and it was almost immediately answered by Oscar.

“Hey.” He said, looking stretched thin. “Come in.”

“Thanks.” Qrow muttered.

“Hey, Oscar.” Ruby said with affected cheeriness as they walked in. “How are you doing?”

“Nervous.” Oscar said abruptly as he closed the door.

“Aren’t we all?” Yang intoned. “Who else is here?”

“Ms Goodwitch, Mr Ironwood, Blake, and her dad. They’re in the living room.” He looked up at Qrow. “And Dad wants to speak to you. He’s in the kitchen.”

“Right. You three go sit down, then. We’ll be with you soon.”

Ruby and Yang followed Oscar to the living room, and Qrow peered around the door to the right. Only half the lights were on in the kitchen, and Ozpin stood at the shadowy end of the room, slowly pouring hot water from the kettle into three mismatched teapots. Qrow could see the stream quivering from the doorway, and waited until he’d put the kettle down and transferred the teapots to a tray before making his presence known.

“Hey.” He said quietly, entering the room fully.

Ozpin didn’t turn from the counter. “Evening.” He muttered.

There was a short silence as Qrow watched him pour milk into a jug and place a bowl of sugar cubes in the centre of the tray. There were no cookies or sweets today; there was no space amongst the stacked cups. He hesitated again, then walked across the room and gently touched Ozpin’s hand.

“Are you alright?”

Ozpin finally looked up and into Qrow’s eyes, then glanced away. “No. But we don’t have time to worry about it.”

“Five minutes isn’t gonna hurt anyone.” He grasped Ozpin’s fingers until he turned to face him. “I’m not okay either. But this is our best hope.”

“Is it? Do you truly believe that this will work?”

“Do you not?”

“I don’t know.” His voice caught, and he took a deep breath before continuing. “I did at first. But there are so many factors that could go wrong. I don’t want to get innocent people involved if there’s no chance we’ll win. Especially the children. Especially my students, and most of all, my own son.”

Qrow sighed. “Yeah, I know. I don’t like it either. But there was no way you could hide it from him, and if he’s anything like Ruby and Yang, he’d have gotten himself involved anyway. And… Look, nothing’s certain. We can’t say we’ll win for sure. We also can’t say we’ll definitely lose. It’s all up in the air. Anything we can do to influence the outcome is good.”

Ozpin nodded silently and leaned into Qrow. Qrow got the hint and embraced him, rubbing his back through his stiff jacket and feeling the subtle quaking of his hands as they met around his own waist.

“I’ve needed you so desperately today.” Oz said mournfully.

“I know. Me too. But I’m here now. _We’re_ here. It’s just a few people and a lot of words.”

“And a whole world of potential consequences.”

There was nothing Qrow could say to truthfully deny that, so he just nodded.

The rattle of an unhappy engine and a squealing of brakes sounded from outside, but Qrow ignored it, leaning away from Ozpin just enough to see his worried face in the half-light. He kissed him, still holding him close enough to feel his heart beating, close enough to feel like the world could disintegrate and none of this would matter anymore. In the moment he almost wanted it to, for it to just be the two of them and nothing else forever.

There was a surprised yelp from the doorway, and Qrow broke away, turning to see Ruby disappear from sight towards the front door. He and Ozpin glanced at one another and separated as Oscar’s voice echoed in the hallway, followed by the sound of the front door opening again. Qrow peered into the hall to see Weiss, Winter, and Amber walking in. Amber waved as Weiss and Ruby hugged, and Winter half-seriously rolled her eyes at them. He called to Ruby, and she separated from Weiss.

“What’s up?” She asked.

“That what I was gonna ask you. Why’d you come to the kitchen?”

Her face reddened. “Well, I just thought you’d wanna know that Amber and Winter were here, but… You were busy.”

He sighed and nodded. “Yeah. Take the others through to the living room, we’ll be right there.” He returned to the kitchen, where Ozpin was leaning against the island countertop. “Are you ready?”

“As ready as I’m going to get.” Oz flattened his hair and pushed up his glasses a little.

“Alright. Come on, then.”

Both of them were shaking equally badly, but Qrow took the tea tray, walking slowly and carefully to the living room. It was a struggle not to fall over anything: Several chairs had been relocated here from the dining room, and an armchair had been moved from behind the couch to be beside the door. Oscar, Ruby, Yang, and Weiss were all sitting on the floor on the other side of the table. He picked his way around the now-silent room and put down the tray, then started spreading out the cups and teapots for everyone to share.

“Help yourselves.” He said. “Oz, you got all the paperwork?”

Ozpin picked up a heap of notebooks and photocopied paper from the seat of the armchair, and held them up as he sat down.

Qrow nodded. “Right. And the rest of you, you’ve all got what we asked you to bring?”

He watched as the severe-looking blonde woman he assumed was Glynda held up a clear folder full of paper, and James on her left moved aside a similarly-full binder to pour tea. Winter and Amber both carried stacks of tattered paper that he knew had been stolen directly from their employee files. He felt a little pang of guilt, and hoped they could get them back where they belonged before Salem found out.

Finally, he nodded, and took a seat in the last empty dining chair. “Then we’d better get started.”

He looked around at the rest of them, Ghira looking sullen and Blake at his left sitting with her shoulders rounded, Glynda watching him with an expectant eyebrow raised, Winter and Amber with wide anxious eyes. Nerves knotted and rose like bile in his stomach and he swallowed hard before he could speak again.

“First of all, we need to know what we have on her.” His voice came out a little thin, and he cleared his throat before he continued. “Salem’s fucked over a lot of us in a lot of ways, but time has passed. There’s a statute of limitations on these things. Which is why James is here, to tell us what will actually get her into trouble.” He gestured to him on the couch. “So. I’ve got evidence she’s evading taxes. That’s a big deal all on its own, but there’s also a high chance she paid someone to get me hurt. Oz has evidence of her embezzling money from a non-profit organisation, years ago. And Glynda, you’ve got something from back in your college days, right?”

Glynda nodded. “Incriminating documents she left with me by mistake; I found them tucked into a textbook she had borrowed. They detail what I believe to be a burglary plot. A list of supplies, a location, and a written conversation between herself and another person debating their plan. The building in question on our college campus was never broken into. Perhaps because she knew she had lost the plans.”

Qrow raised his eyebrows and tilted his head. “Yeah. I don’t know how that would go down in court if it came to that. James?”

James shrugged and didn’t open the binder on his lap as he answered. “The statute of limitations are long over for what’s basically a threat that never went through. The fact that nothing ever happened would get it dismissed in many cases.”

“But would Salem know that?”

Ozpin sighed. “Qrow, she isn’t stupid. Salem doesn’t act the way she does out of recklessness. She has learned to plan carefully, and it’s down to past mistakes that we… stupidly dismissed.” He shook his head. “She may not know everything about the law; I sincerely doubt that she does. But I also doubt that notes from more than twenty years ago will frighten her.”

Qrow set his jaw, wanting to protest. Ozpin was right, though; they couldn’t afford to underestimate her. “Yeah. Okay. Can it be of any use anyway?” He turned back to James, who tilted his head.

“It wouldn’t be admissible evidence, but if this did go to court, it’s _possible_ it could be used against any character witness she has. It’s hard to claim someone’s an honest person when there’s evidence otherwise, even if it can’t be used to convict her of a crime.”

“Right. That’s still helpful, if it comes to that. So… Amber, Winter. What did you two find?”

“We found out we’re getting stiffed.” Winter said severely, shuffling through the papers on her lap. “I’ve been photographing my timesheets since you got fired. We knew Salem was up to something. Since An started working the kitchen, she’s been rewriting our timesheets the same way she rewrote your register tallies.”

“What?” Weiss cried across the room.

“She’s been taking two hours off each of our shifts for the last few weeks.” Amber continued. “We’re losing a full day’s pay each week. I have no idea how she thinks she’ll get away with it; we get our pay checks tomorrow. It’s going to be a huge difference.”

Qrow shook his head. “No, she doesn’t think she’ll get away with it. She’s trying to get rid of you two. She wants you to quit because the working conditions suck, and then she’ll threaten you into not pressing charges.” He smirked, and stood up, starting to pace restlessly behind the couch. “But actually, that’s great for us. Wage theft is serious business, and now not only has she kept my severance and An’s last pay check, she’s all out robbing you two. And you’ve definitely got evidence that she’s been changing them?”

“Without a doubt.” Winter replied. “The handwriting on her copies is completely different.”

“Then before you put all that stuff back tomorrow, copy it. All of it. Keep it somewhere safe until Saturday.”

“We will.”

“Good. I think what you’ve got there is our biggest opportunity to scare her. She underestimates young people like you two, she’ll never expect you to have figured her out already.”

There was a moment of silence, and then Yang gave a mirthless snort of laughter from the corner.

“Are you all insane?” She asked loudly.

Everyone turned to look at where she sat on the rug, legs tucked up under her. Qrow watched Glynda give her a scathing glare, and moved to stand between them.

“What are you talking about?” He asked.

Yang stood up too, looking him in the eye. “You keep talking about this evidence, and what you’re gonna do with it. You’ve been talking about a plan for days.” She turned towards Ozpin. “But you don’t _have_ a plan! You’re all just sitting here, talking about the law. The law doesn’t mean _anything_ if you’re not getting the cops involved! So what is it? Are you doing this yourselves? Or are you going to the police?” She looked slowly over them all. “Cause right now, all you’re doing is setting yourselves up for disaster.”

Qrow scowled and folded his arms. “Yeah? Well, what do you suggest we do?”

They stared each other down for a moment in stiff, uncomfortable silence. Finally, Yang turned her head away to look down at Ruby.

“I don’t know.” She said. “But I think Ruby does.”

Ruby looked up, wide-eyed, but nodded. “I have some ideas.”

“Qrow, with all due respect-” Ghira started, but Qrow cut him off.

“Look, if you two wanna help… Go ahead.” He deflated slightly. “Yang’s right. The plan right now is to walk in and throw a bunch of paper on the counter. We need something better than that.” He glanced over at Ozpin, and they made worried eye contact for a second.

Ruby stood up, and Yang sat back down in her place. A steely expression came over her. “When are we doing this?”

“Saturday.”

“I know that part. What time of day?”

“Four. Between the lunch and dinner rushes. It’ll be quiet.”

“But not empty.” She took a deep breath and looked around at Weiss sitting behind her, Yang to her right, Blake across the room. “We need to keep innocent people out of the way. That means we have to get any customers out.”

“You could take them through the side room and out the back door.” Amber piped up. “Then you guys could block the front door.”

“In that case, we’ll need someone outside to make sure no one tries to get in.”

“Maybe I could do that?” Oscar suggested, tentatively raising his hand. “It’s… probably better if I’m out of the way.”

“I think that would be a good idea.” Ozpin quickly agreed.

Ruby nodded. “Alright. Then-”

“Wait a moment.” Ghira interrupted. “Are you seriously intending to have these children involved? Your own students?” He asked Ozpin, then turned to Qrow. “Your nieces and their friends?”

Qrow squeezed his eyes shut. “Look, Ghira, I know it’s not good, but-”

“You’re going to use them for your cause?”

“Dad, stop.” Blake hissed.

“Uncle Qrow and Professor Ozpin aren’t _using_ us for anything.” Ruby said calmly. “We volunteered. All of us, including Blake. We wanted to help, because Salem is slowly destroying lives all around her. Including Uncle Qrow’s, and ours by extension. Why shouldn’t we get to fight against her too?”

Ghira didn’t seem to have an answer for that, and sat back, his expression worried.

“I know you’re nervous. We all are. But you’re going to be there for a reason. We’re going to watch over each other.”

“Well said.” Ozpin nodded. “We’re here as a team. And we all have important parts to play. Miss Rose, if you’d like to continue?”

“Thank you.” She turned back to face Qrow and put her hands on her hips. “So, Blake and Weiss will get the customers out, and Oscar will stand guard outside. I’m guessing you and Professor Ozpin are going to lead.”

“Yeah. We should be doing most of the talking.”

“And Amber and Winter will be coming in from the kitchen. I think Mr Ironwood and Mr Belladonna should follow you in, since they’re mostly helping to intimidate Salem. Hopefully it’ll make her second guess anything she might do to the two of you. And then Ms Goodwitch, Yang, and I will act as backup.”

“No, wait, wait a second. You and Yang should help get the customers out and then stay out back. You won’t be able to do much anyway.”

“Hey, I can fight!” Yang exclaimed.

“I’m not denying that, I’m saying I don’t want you to.” Qrow’s voice came out harsh. “I don’t know what’s going to happen in that bar. It could be as simple as a tense conversation, but there could be a real fight. Salem’s got a guy working there who _I_ wouldn’t even mess with, let alone you two.”

“What happened to us making our own choice, again?”

He covered his face with his hands where he stood, and sighed into them. He was all too aware of the eyes on him, the expectant tension in the air as they all waited to see what he would say. “Alright. Fine. If you want to stick around, you can.” His voice was muffled through his palms. “But if something goes wrong, you two can get in trouble with your dad just like I will.”

“Fine.” Ruby said firmly. “But it _won’t_ go wrong.”

* * *

 

The discussion calmed down from there, and they talked through everyone Qrow, Amber, and Winter had seen working at the bar lately. Along with Cinder and Hazel, the moustached man Qrow had often seen around had been hired. His name was Arthur, Winter was sure, and he was smarmy and rude, but lazy. They were sure he would be no threat. They had also seen a woman with long dark hair hanging around frequently, but as she wasn’t working there, Qrow was sure she was either a customer who could be herded out, or another of Salem’s potential proteges who would be easy to deal with.

They went over the details Ruby had suggested again, added potential problems and how they would solve them, and no one quite stopped looking worried, but their fears seemed to be slightly assuaged. It was eleven before the party finally started to break up and leave, Blake and a still-disgruntled Ghira setting off first, followed by Amber, Winter, and Weiss, who was staying the night at their apartment. Glynda and James hung around for hot cocoa and a final rundown of what Qrow was going to say and do. Then James offered Glynda a ride home, and they left together.

Finally, Qrow, Ruby, and Yang were left with Ozpin and Oscar, clearing up the living room, collecting mugs and putting the chairs back in the dining room where they belonged. Oscar seemed to feel the unease in the air, because he took Ruby and Yang out of the room with a pathetic excuse and closed the door behind him. Qrow, now sitting on the couch at Ozpin’s right, turned towards him slightly. He looked as though he’d aged a year in a few hours.

“How are you feeling?” He asked quietly.

Ozpin shook his head. “I’m just… Very tired.”

“Oh. You want me to get the kids and head off?”

“No.” He quickly placed a hand on Qrow’s knee as if to hold him in place. “Stay.”

Qrow nodded and moved closer, wrapping his arm around Ozpin’s waist. “You’re sure you’re alright?”

A thick moment of silence settled over the room. There was a quiver in Ozpin’s voice when he finally spoke. “I’m… Not certain.”

“Oz. You’re holding out on me. If this is about Saturday… I mean, we’re gonna win, you know? Twelve of us, and, what, three of them? Maybe four? There’s no way Salem will dare do anything drastic.”

“Do you really believe that so strongly?”

Qrow chewed his lip. “No. But I believe it hard enough that I’m willing to try and make it true.”

“I wish I could say the same.”

His eyebrows knitting in shock, he moved to take both of Ozpin’s hands in his own. “Look, if you’re… If you’re scared, you don’t have to come in and face her, you can-”

“I am not afraid to face her.” His voice was hard and he didn’t look up from their hands. “I’ve confronted her many times. I’m afraid of _you_ confronting her. Of my _students_ facing her. I’m afraid that she will laugh at our efforts and make things worse for us all. And…” He trailed off, ducking his head even further.

“Oz, it’s okay. I’m listening.”

He shook his head and looked up, his eyes wet. “She manipulated me. She ground me down until I could think almost nothing of myself. Until I was an extension of her, and of her wants and needs. I thought that… enough time had passed, and I could be near her without worry. I thought I had grown beyond her. But all this talk of her lately has made me remember… what it was like. How she hurt me.”

A single tear tracked down his face. Qrow let go of his hands and gathered him into a hug, holding him tightly and stroking his hair with one hand. Ozpin clung to the back of his shirt, and sobbed quietly into his shoulder.

“It’s alright.” Qrow said, and felt his throat start to ache. He felt helpless and worried and desperate to have any idea what to do. He wondered if this is what Ozpin had felt like all those times he’d comforted Qrow through the same thing. Unlike Ozpin, he didn’t know what to say, and so he was silent, rubbing his back and blinking away the tears that welled in his own eyes until they overflowed. Seeing such a pillar of strength as Oz so hopeless was more than he could handle.

It felt like a long time before the silence in the room was complete again, empty but for the sonorous ticking of the grandfather clock. Neither of them made to move, and Ozpin spoke into Qrow’s shoulder.

“I don’t know if I can keep my composure in front of her anymore.” His voice was strained.

“You don’t have to.” Qrow replied softly. “And I told you, you don’t have to come in at all if you don’t want to.”

“I want to. We’re in this mess because of me. I’m going to pull us out of it.”

“What? Oz, you didn’t do any of this. She hated me before I met you.”

“Maybe. But she focused on you more than she otherwise might have because I took an interest in you.” He pulled away, letting go of Qrow and wiping his eyes on the backs of his hands. “She will never pass up an opportunity to hurt me. Even if that means collateral damage.”

“She’s not gonna get to hurt any of us.” Qrow’s voice had a hard, tearful edge. “I won’t let that happen.”

Ozpin hesitated, but finally nodded. “No. Of course not.”

“I’m as scared as you are. But what can she really do? All she has is words.”

“Words are all she needs.” He stood up, and Qrow followed his lead.

“Then don’t listen.” Qrow grabbed Ozpin’s arm again and made him face him. “Please. Just take care of yourself. If it’s that bad, try not to think about her. Distract yourself, do _something_. You can’t suffer like this for the next three days.”

“I’ll try.” He replied unconvincingly.

Qrow gathered both of Ozpin’s hands and held them in both of his between their chests, then rested their foreheads together. “It’ll be over soon.”

“I know.”

And they were still for a moment, and Qrow knew that they would both worry themselves beyond any ability to sleep that night.


	35. Squall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time has come to confront Salem. Warnings: Minor violence and injury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone been feeling nice and tense for a few days? Good, me too. Here's 7k words for your consideration.

Tensions were high as the rest of the week passed, and Qrow found he had been right about his upcoming lack of sleep. He spent Thursday and Friday evening at Ozpin’s house, staying through the night and into the cold blackness of the early mornings before walking home for a short, unsettled rest. Ozpin was even more anxious than Qrow; now that he’d let it slip out once, it seemed to seep from him at all times, as long as Oscar wasn’t present. Several times, Qrow caught him staring into space, hands twisting and untwisting in his lap, and had no idea what to do, how to help. Most times he would simply touch him to bring him back to reality. At others he would wait for Oz to return on his own, and it would take long minutes of silence.

Qrow woke on the Saturday morning at an hour earlier than he’d have liked, to the sound of his phone vibrating on the nightstand. He squinted unhappily at it: Three hours sleep had been far from adequate. The screen stated that Tai was calling, and his stomach contracted almost painfully as he reached out to grab it. He hadn’t spoken to Tai in a while, mostly due to how busy he’d been, but recently because he didn’t want to let his worries about Salem slip. But there was good news, too; he had to remember that.

He answered the phone without leaving his bed, and Tai apologised, immediately knowing he’d woken him. There was a lazy, relaxed note to the man’s static-crackled voice, and Qrow could tell that he’d been drinking. It was late on Saturday night in Qingdao, but he was still surprised at Tai’s easy laugh, the affection in his tone. The timing was perfect for Qrow to keep his attention off Salem.

He lied by omission, refusing to mention anything to do with work at all, instead talking Tai’s ear off about Ozpin. He’d confessed that they’d started dating the last time Tai had called. Now Tai cooed over the sappy tone in Qrow’s voice, the nervous laugh he couldn’t help. For almost an hour, Qrow had his mind taken off the tempest that was now less than eight hours away, as he lay in bed listening to Tai make immature but endearing jokes about his new partner.

Ozpin really did make him happy.

The joy couldn’t last, though, and when Tai finally hung up the silence overtook Qrow all over again, washing him out like a great, sucking tide. He thought he would be lucky, this time, not to drown.

And luck was not usually on his side.

* * *

 

He tried to keep on a brave face as the day flew by, spending time with Ruby and Yang and avoiding the thought of what would happen to them if he got hurt or arrested. What he would do if they were the ones who got hurt. It was all what-ifs and maybes, things he couldn’t afford to think about. But he was finding himself a hypocrite, even more so when Ozpin texted him with his own worries and Qrow calmly validated and then explained away each one. Their anxiety was almost identical, but somehow Qrow could not force reason or rationality into his own thinking. He could only do that for Ozpin.

The routine he’d been forcing himself to stick to helped only mildly, as he took his new medication and drank as minimally as he could manage to avoid the two interacting. The pills weren’t helping yet; he’d been told to expect a four week wait before the effects started to manifest. He was starting to wish he’d gotten help sooner, thinking that maybe if he’d been taking them longer at the very least the physical symptoms of his fear would be lessened. He couldn’t count the number of times he’d wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans today. Wishing would do him no good, though, and he simply focused on the plan, repeating it over and over in his head like a mantra.

They gathered at Ozpin’s house at three thirty, and he and Qrow could hardly bear to look at one another. Fear had finally driven its wedge between them, as they organised the kids and adults alike into action. Qrow could only hope the silence and distance was temporary, and that they’d both be present and capable of appreciating its removal when this was over. In the meantime, they split themselves between two cars: Qrow drove Ozpin, Oscar, Ruby, and Yang; James drove Glynda, Ghira, Blake, and Weiss.

The drive was quiet, and through glances in the rear view mirror, Qrow caught Yang with her hand on Ruby’s knee, Ruby with hers on Oscar’s arm. They were reassuring each other in a way Qrow couldn’t currently manage. At a red light not far from The Gold Bar, he looked over at Ozpin and noticed that he was fidgeting with his cane, looking down at his knees with the dejected expression that had become commonplace on him over the last few days. It made his chest hurt, and he felt the flare of combined pity and anger he’d first noticed when Ozpin had told him how much Salem had hurt him. He wondered what he would do if she threatened him today, and found himself frightened of the answer he already knew.

They regrouped in the parking lot at the back of the bar, thankful to find few other vehicles present. After a brief run-down of the plan, the group moved around to the front of the building, out of view of the window.

“You two know what to do.” Qrow addressed Blake and Weiss. “If there’s any customers in the front room, talk to them like you know them. Insist they follow you. You don’t need to be so friendly to the ones in the side room, as long as they don’t make a fuss. Just take them all out the back door and get them to leave if they can. Let us know when everyone’s out. You can keep watch around the back while we’re in there.”

“Right.” Weiss nodded. “Should I text Winter and let her know we’re here?”

“No need. She’ll know when I walk in. It’s not gonna be quiet.”

Ghira pulled Blake aside and hugged her. “Be safe.”

“I’ll be fine, Dad.” Blake hugged him back. “But thanks.”

The two girls walked up to the front door, hesitated, and walked in. There was silence for a long moment, broken by the conversations of passers-by whose querying looks Qrow could feel on the back of his head as he looked down the alleyway towards the parking lot. Being here, possibly about to fight his ex-boss, felt surreal, like he’d slipped into one of his nightmares. A phone pinged with a notification.

“Blake says Cinder’s behind the bar.” Yang said darkly. “And Hazel’s in the kitchen.”

Qrow sighed. “Yeah. I expected as much.”

Silence fell again, but this time it was short. There was a dual chirp from the parking lot, and Qrow’s stomach dropped. Before he could speak, the quiet sound strengthened into an alarm, ear-piercing and echoing.

“Fuck!” He panicked, glancing at Ozpin and finding his eyes similarly wide. “The door alarm, I forgot! Salem’s gonna-” He cut himself off, mind working faster than his mouth could keep up with. “We need to get in there and distract her from Weiss and Blake.”

Before anyone could argue, he’d marched up to the door and swung it open.

He stopped in the middle of the main room, for a moment overwhelmed by the noise of the alarm, the empty chairs and abandoned coffee cups on the table by the door, the hard scowl on Cinder’s face as she stared at him, outraged. Then the alarm died, and another door slammed in the side room. Qrow looked around to see the rest of his party filing into the bar behind him, lining up the way they’d discussed, Oscar hovering right outside. Ozpin joined him at the front, stood at his right with his cane held firmly in hand, and they exchanged a hard, worried glance. Qrow wanted to touch him, to squeeze his hand in reassurance, but knew this wasn’t the time or place.

Salem appeared at the doorway to the side room, posture relaxed but face contorted into a hard mask of fury.

“ _What_ is going on?” She spat, focusing on Qrow. She caught sight of Ozpin beside him, and seemed to falter, eyebrows quirking as if to rise before setting into an even deeper scowl. “And what are _you_ doing here?”

“We’re here to collect a debt.” The words seemed to flow from Qrow’s mouth without input from his brain. A sense of eerie calm had washed over him like a cold wind; he was panicking underneath it, but could not access the feeling.

Salem’s gaze slowly slipped over all of his companions, and he thought he saw a spark of worry in her eyes as she recognised Ghira. She turned her head towards the bar, where Cinder still stood frozen, seemingly awaiting orders. “Hazel?” Salem called calmly. “Come here.”

“Yeah, I can do that, too.” Qrow retorted. “Winter! Amber!”

The kitchen door swung open, and Winter and Amber strode out to stand at the side of the room, arms folded in their kitchen whites. Hazel followed them out, barely acknowledging their presence even as he paused to look at the gathered crowd.

“I hope this isn’t going to be a fight.” He said, an intimidating rumble in his voice.

“It’ll be whatever it needs to be.” Qrow replied, sounding more confident than he felt. “So, are you happy now?” He asked Salem. “Is this all you’ve got? Cause I’d like this not to take all evening.”

“What are you even here for?” Cinder snapped, seeming to remember where she was. “Do you really think petty revenge is going to get you your job back? You lost it for good reason.”

“I’m not interested in my job back. Now you mention it, though… Revenge does sound pretty sweet.” He turned to Ruby, who was carrying the thick binder full of paper they’d brought along. “Hey, kid, hand me that.”

Ruby nodded and silently passed it to him.

“Using your own nieces for your dirty work?” Salem snorted. “You truly have stooped to great depths, Qrow. And Ozpin… I can’t help noticing your own son outside. How you must have disappointed him.”

Ozpin glanced out at Oscar, facing away from the bar, but didn’t speak.

“Believe me, we didn’t want them involved either. But anyway: Enough goading, Salem, unless you’ve got something concrete to give us.” Qrow strode up to the bar and planted the binder heavily on top. “Because I’ve got a rap sheet to read you.”

Salem paused, glancing quickly between Qrow, Ozpin, James, and Ghira, her arrogant façade dropping briefly. “You don’t have anything that will hold up.”

“Oh, smart. You’ve figured it out.” He flipped the binder open to the first item. “You’re wrong, though. We’ve verified all this stuff. You know for damn sure you’ve fucked up, and even the recent stuff could get you into a whole heap of shit. And the older stuff…” He shook his head. “Right here, we have record of an intended burglary, something you never went through with because you lost the plans. Next, some suspicious tax forms from your early working days. Maybe those are excusable. But then… Embezzling money from a non-profit organisation, name of Found Family…. That sound familiar to you?”

Salem’s composure was slipping quickly now, her eyes widening with each word Qrow spoke. She turned to Ozpin, still gripping his cane tightly in the centre of the room. “You lie.” She hissed.

“I do not.” Ozpin said softly. “You know what you did, Salem. Perhaps you don’t consider it as wrong as we do, but you know that you stole sixty-thousand dollars from Found Family. You know that you deprived many young people of a chance to be, or feel, normal. You cannot deny that in good faith. Although, knowing you, my version of good faith is very different to yours.”

There was an odd, frustrated screech from behind the bar. Qrow glanced up to see Cinder with her right arm wound back, a glass in hand. He barely had time to duck before she tossed it across the room with pinpoint accuracy. Ozpin flinched and raised his cane, and the glass shattered on it, shards scattering as Ruby screamed. He stayed low to the ground for a moment, then straightened up, a cut on his cheekbone slowly leaking blood down his face.

“Oz!” Qrow called out, reaching out to him briefly. The second his hands were off the binder, Cinder grabbed it, made to pull it away. He slammed his arm down on it just in time, before she could slide it off the counter, and they tugged it back and forth for a moment before he finally pried her fingers away. She grabbed his hands in retaliation, long fingernails slicing into his skin until he wrenched his arms upwards and dislodged her with a growl of pain. Blood started to bead on the backs of his hands, and he looked around at Salem’s half-horrified, half-jubilant grimace, Hazel’s impassive ire.

He barely managed to keep a clear head. “Shall we go on?” He slammed the binder back down on the counter, trying to hit Cinder’s hands but missing. “We’ve got evidence that you’ve stolen money from the bar, that you’re evading taxes, that you’ve committed wage theft, and that you commissioned your ‘ _good friend_ ’ Tyrian to try to kill me. And then had him and Hazel here take part in the plot to get me fired. I never got my severance check. An never got her last pay check. You’re not paying Amber and Winter correctly. I could go on, but frankly, all of that is enough to get you arrested three times over.”

“What’s your point?” Salem asked.

“My point is that you can go along with what I’m asking, or you can suffer. Something’s gotta give. You go around treating people like shit your entire life and eventually, it catches up with you.”

Cinder grabbed another glass from below the bar. Qrow yanked the binder off the counter and ducked below it.

Everything moved in slow motion as he looked at the others gathered by the door, five identical horrified expressions reflected in his own. And then there was Ozpin, all fear seeming to have drained out of him and been replaced with anger. His eyes narrowed, and Qrow watched him flip his cane over in his hand in a fluid motion, so that he was holding it more like a sword. The glass flew through the air, and Ozpin drew back his right hand, then swung the cane through the trajectory. In a split second, glass shards were flying across the room in an arc to the right, scattering across the floor with a tumultuous sound. Some pieces hit Salem in the legs, causing her to step backwards in shock, her expression turning intense and manic as she looked at Ozpin.

He pushed up his glasses. “That’s enough, Miss Fall.” He said quietly.

Hazel made to move forward, but Ozpin pointed the tip of his cane at him.

“And you, Mr Reinart. You said you hoped there wouldn’t be a fight. Let’s make sure that’s the case, shall we?”

Salem laughed, an awful, goading snicker completely devoid of real humour. “Haven’t you gotten brave?” She simpered, stepping closer to him. “I remember when you bowed to me, Oz. When you were _grateful_ to bow to me. Why don’t we try that again?”

“Hurting me was one thing, Salem. But I won’t stand by and let you hurt those I love. Not anymore.” Ozpin stepped forward in front of the group and extended his cane so that it barred the space between them.

“ _Love_.” She snorted. “Do you truly think you know anything of love?”

“Do you?” He turned the question back on her. “Do you know love as anything but tactical closeness to someone who is useful to you?”

She was stunned into silence, and Qrow watched, helpless, from where he’d backed up against the counter. A sound behind him made him turn, and he watched as Cinder edged her way out from behind the bar, another glass in hand.

“Don’t.” He growled.

She stared impassively at him, and raised the glass, but stopped in her tracks at the sound of an engine roaring outside, brakes squealing in the parking lot. Qrow took the opportunity to grab her wrist and wrench the glass away, tossing it behind the bar, where it smashed on the rubber mats. Cinder snarled and punched him without warning, sending his head snapping back and shocking him, but she was all brute force: She didn’t expect him to grab her arm and twist it around her back, forcing her to her knees with a yell.

Salem turned to see them both struggling on the ground, and made to speak, before a dual chirp and a door slam sounded from the side room.

There was silence, and Qrow tried not to show his shock and worry, knowing that responding to Weiss and Blake’s return would only put them in danger. But as he glanced around, he saw Ghira and Winter exchanging anxious looks. Cinder kicked him off in his distraction, and he pushed off the floor away from her as figures appeared in the side room doorway.

Three of them.

The one in the centre was wearing leathers, all red and black, and a white motorcycle helmet with a one-way visor. Their face was entirely obstructed, and yet there was something familiar about them. They had Weiss’s upper arm in one hand, Blake’s in the other, and both were struggling hard.

“Are these yours?” An impassive female voice asked.

“Let go of me!” Weiss cried, finally delivering a half-hearted punch to the stranger’s solar plexus.

She barely flinched, but dropped both girls, Weiss stumbling and falling to the ground. Blake picked her up and they staggered back to the rest of the group, where Yang immediately checked on both of them for injuries.

Qrow turned back to the anonymous rider at the same time as Yang, both of them studying her intently for a moment.

“Mom?” Yang finally croaked.

The figure froze, and turned her expressionless helmet to her in silence. Then, slowly, almost ceremoniously, she removed it.

Raven’s long black hair tumbled out of the helmet in a tangle, and she frowned at Yang, then at each of the others in turn. “What in the hell is going on here?”

Qrow’s vision went red, and he leapt up to stride over to her, shaking violently, stopped just short of outright hitting her. She didn’t recoil even as he got in her face, just put down her helmet on the nearest table.

“What the fuck are you _doing_ here?” He asked, genuine rage in his voice.

“I was looking for you.” She said, disgusted. “But I seem to have gotten more than I bargained for. As always.”

“Why were you looking for Uncle Qrow?” Yang demanded, stepping forwards.

Glynda grabbed Yang’s arm to try to hold her back, but she shook loose.

“Get off of me!” She walked up to stand behind Ozpin, still locked in an impasse with Salem. “Well?”

Raven turned to Yang. “I wanted to find you. I wanted to speak to you.”

“Well, I’m right here.” She shrugged. “But I was kinda under the impression that you didn’t wanna talk to me. I mean, you _did_ hang up on me.”

“Yang-”

“Wait, wait.” Qrow interrupted. “No. _Why_ are you here? How did you get here? How did you find me?”

Raven rolled her eyes. “I knew you would still be in Vale. You never moved on. I came to look for you; it’s a small town, I knew it wouldn’t take long. I asked around all the bars. Salem here said you used to work here, and that she’d find your address for me. She told me you had Yang. I’ve been… checking in for a couple of weeks.”

Qrow froze, then laughed, shocked and almost revelling in the situation.

“What’s so funny?” She snapped.

“Ah, that’s great. Let me guess, you’ve been buying drinks every time you came in?”

“Of course. What’s your point?”

“She’s been milking you! She’s had my fucking address the entire time, I only got fired a few weeks back. Salem strung you along and took advantage of you, like she does to everyone.”

Raven’s eyes narrowed, and she glanced at Yang again. “Why should I believe you?”

“You’re fucking kidding me, right?” Yang snapped, her voice pitching up. “We’re all fucking standing here, going up against her, and you think _we’re_ the ones in the wrong?”

Raven avoided her eye, staring at Qrow instead. “Stranger things have happened.” She snarled.

“Yeah, well not in this town. Maybe in whatever shithole place you’ve been living in, but not in Vale.”

“Aren’t you a little young to be using language like that?”

“Aren’t you a little old to be suddenly showing up in your daughter’s life?”

There was a long, fiery silence, and Qrow backed away as all eyes were fixed on his sister and niece. He made his way towards the bar and felt behind him for the heavy binder, sliding it quietly off the bar top as Cinder stood up in front of him, rubbing her arm and watching Raven intently. He lifted the binder to shoulder level and dropped it on the hardwood floor, the echoing bang startling everyone in the room. All eyes turned to him, the tension tightening into something that felt solid.

“Raven, you need to take a look at this.” He picked up the binder and handed it to her.

She looked at it as though it might bite her. “Why?”

“Because it’s the truth. Everything Salem’s done. The reason we’re here.”

“It’s nonsense.” Salem sniffed. “Slander and lies.”

“Slander is spoken, Salem, this is libel if it’s anything.” Qrow said dismissively. “But the point is, it’s not. You know who’s on my side, Raven? I’ve got two city councillors here. Two teachers and past friends of hers. That’s not even mentioning those of us who’ve been on the personal end of things right here in this bar.” He gestured to Winter and Amber, both now backed up against the far wall near the kitchen door. “Take a look at that and tell me it’s not indisputable.”

“You have nothing that is admissible in court!” Salem almost screeched. “You are operating on the mistaken assumption that you have any power or control in this situation!”

“Don’t I?” Qrow pressed a hand to his chest gloatingly. “Because I haven’t seen you try anything even remotely risky so far. Maybe I’d believe you if you acted more like Cinder. Throwing glasses… That’s pretty daring.” He stared Salem down, stepping a little closer to Ozpin and waiting for her to make a move, but she stood still and silent. “See? You know you’re outnumbered.”

“Is this real?” Raven asked abruptly. “This email?”

“The one about a ‘pest problem’?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah. Salem paid a friend to try and kill me.”

Raven was silent for a moment, leafing through the pages. “And who’s Hazel?”

Qrow simply jerked a thumb at the large man still standing in front of the bar. Raven stared at him for a moment, then ducked her head back to the binder.

“And these go back as far as…”

“Over two decades ago.” Ozpin said quietly. “When we were in college.”

Raven eyed him carefully for a moment and nodded. “A lot of greed.”

“I thought you trusted me.” Salem hissed. She was truly losing her composure now, a wide-eyed, desperate expression on her face. “You told me you hated your brother. You’d really take his word over mine?”

She hesitated, a page half-turned in the binder. She dropped it on the nearest table and looked at Salem, then at Yang, then at Qrow. She glanced at Hazel, and turned back to see Ruby peering around James. Ruby caught her eye.

“Um… Raven?” She piped up. “Can I talk to you?”

“No.” Raven said coldly, turning away.

“Wait, please!” Ruby pushed past James and marched forward to stand beside Yang. “You know Uncle Qrow’s right. You know Salem’s bad. And you know we’d appreciate you standing beside us so much! We need you! And… You’d have the satisfaction of knowing you did the right thing.” She held out a hand. “Please.”

Raven snorted, and turned to stare at her for a moment, incredulous. “You really are just like your mother.”

“She is.” Qrow put in. “And that’s not a bad thing. You know that.” He looked into Raven’s eyes, challenging her to argue. When she didn’t, he blustered on. “Ruby’s right. Why don’t you stand up to Salem? You know she’s been fucking with you. You know all those documents are solid. You know what she’s done wrong. Why won’t you stand with us? Is it spite? Can’t deal with being on the same side as your weak little brother?”

She was silent, breaking his gaze and looking down at the binder again, the doctored wage forms that Amber and Winter had provided. There was sincere doubt in her body language, but she made no move to respond.

Suddenly, it all clicked in Qrow’s head.

Yang spoke before he could. “You’re scared.” She breathed. “You’re afraid of her.”

“They all are.” Qrow responded, a smirk creeping onto his face. “You’re all afraid of her, aren’t you? God, what could she do to you?” He turned to Cinder. “And I bet she promised you something, didn’t she? I bet she promised you it way back when you first met her, before you worked for her. She played the long game and treated you as badly as she could without getting caught, and she made you rely on her. That’s what she does. Isn’t it?” He looked around, and caught Ozpin’s eye.

Ozpin nodded. “A tactic of abuse.”

Qrow looked at Raven, still staring down at the documents. “She promised Raven my address. She didn’t have time to really bring her around, but she intimidated her. And Cinder.” He turned to her, standing in a circle of broken glass shards with wide eyes. “Cinder, what did she promise you? What did she say she’d give you?”

Cinder looked at the ground and mumbled something.

“Say again?”

“The bar.” She growled. “She said… She’d hand it down to me. If I worked for her long enough.”

Qrow laughed. “That’s cute. But let me tell you, she’d _never_ do that. She’d sooner sell it from under you than let someone have it for free, no matter how long you worked here. Almost sad, really, that you believed her, but I can’t blame you.” He turned to Hazel, still standing in the same place, his fists now clenched, chest heaving with heavy breaths. “And you. What did she promise _you_?”

“My sister.” Hazel muttered.

“Your sister?” He quirked an eyebrow.

“She went missing.” The words seemed to take great effort to produce. “During a field trip from Beacon High School. Salem… promised that it was Ozpin’s fault.” His voice rose slightly. “She promised me revenge. She… said he would be back. Alone. That I could have him.” He shook his head. “I don’t want to hurt anyone who doesn’t deserve it. Was it really him?” He directed the question at Salem.

“Of course it was him!” She snapped. “I wouldn’t lie to you, Hazel.”

“You would.” He sighed. “So… perhaps this is your problem.” He looked up, a dangerous glint in his eye.

Cinder got her voice back. “You lied to us.” Her expression darkened. “You lied to _me_!”

“Girl-”

“Don’t call me that!” She stormed forwards, forcing Salem to step back into the edge of a table. “You promised me _everything_! I never thought I’d get it all, but… You never intended to give me any of it?”

“Of course not!” Salem snapped. “You really think you deserved a single penny? You are a terrible employee, and a foul person! I’d pay to see you disappear, and I’ve heavily considered making that a reality!”

Cinder panted heavily for a moment, bared her teeth, and drew back her hand, quivering. Another harsh snarl escaped her throat, and she turned away without delivering the hit she clearly wanted to, running around the crowd and out the front door of the bar.

Qrow watched her go, then glanced at a nervous looking Salem and defeated Hazel. “Even more outnumbered now, huh?” He crossed his arms casually. “Look, we’re gonna give you a choice. Either we can take all this evidence to the cops and the IRS and you can deal with them, or we can keep it under wraps, and you can leave Vale. Preferably Oregon altogether; I know you’ve got the money to set up in another state. What do you think?”

“Why should I trust you?”

“Well, you don’t have to. But it’s gonna happen, whether you believe me or not.”

“I know where you live, Qrow. I can make your life a living hell.” She spat.

“Please. You’ve been doing that for months. I’m still here. You really think now is the time to try escalating?”

She looked between him and Ozpin, her mouth turning down into a sneer. “You both disgust me. Do you truly believe you’re doing the right thing?” She focused on Ozpin. “Is this a good example to set for your students? Your children?”

“No.” Ozpin replied calmly. “But sometimes one must fight fire with fire.”

“Gimme an answer, Salem, I don’t have all day.”

“Hazel?” Salem called, almost hopefully.

“I will not answer to you anymore.” Hazel replied. He had relaxed slightly, and was now watching the proceedings, emotionless. “This is not my problem.”

Salem clenched her own fists, brought them up to her face, and screamed. Any intimidation Qrow had still been feeling melted away: She looked like a large toddler having a tantrum.

“Oh, please, spare us the fucking trouble.” He couldn’t restrain another smirk. “Are you leaving Vale, or are we gonna make you?”

She turned and knocked over the nearest table, flipped several chairs, and picked up one more. Ozpin stepped in front of Qrow, extending his cane again in anticipation of violence. But Salem simply smashed the chair on the floor, kicking the splintered remains of its legs across the hardwood.

“That’s enough.” Ozpin pointed the tip of his cane at her, speaking gently, as if to a child. “You need to calm down. We can easily call the police here and now if it becomes necessary.”

Her face fell from fury into resignation, and she looked around at the mess she had made. Her eyes stayed locked on the floor as she spoke. “How long?”

Qrow considered. “A week.”

“I need three.”

“You can have two. At the end of that time, you hand the bar over to me. You can sell me it for what it’s worth with all the work I’m gonna have to do on it, which is not much. The debt and back-taxes are your problem.”

She looked around, at where James, Glynda, and Ghira had quietly advanced and Yang backed up to comfort Ruby, at where Raven was still staring at the binder with her head down, at three of her now-former employees watching her silently. “Fine.” She eked out, with some effort.

“Good. I’ll be back to oversee the proceedings. You know, paperwork. I’ll, uh… bring James with me. He’s trained in law. You’ve got a bit of a reputation about messing with official documents, so… Forgive me if I can’t trust you.”

“Just leave.” She snapped. “Just get out! I’ll do what needs to be done, but if I hear that word of this spreads-”

“No one will hear anything until you’re gone. But you’d better be gone. Fourteen days. I’ll hold you to that.” Qrow made to turn away, but paused. “Oh, and make sure you take any ‘associates’ who are still on your side with you. If I see Tyrian in this town again it’s going to go badly for both of you.”

Salem didn’t reply, and Qrow took a deep breath, feeling like there was oxygen in the air again. He hadn’t realised how hard his heart had been beating. Ozpin relaxed a little at his right and lowered his cane, turning it the right way up again.

“We’ll be off, then. We’ll check in on… Wednesday? How’s that sound?” There was no reply, so he carried on. “Alright. Let’s go, gang.” He paused, watching Raven still looking down at the binder. He slapped her arm gently. “Hey, grab that, come on. Don’t forget your helmet.”

Raven seemed to start back to reality, and made time to frown at him before doing as he asked.

He gathered everyone else, including Winter and Amber, and shepherded them out of the front door, pausing at the rear of the crowd and turning to see Hazel staring daggers at the back of Salem’s head. “Hey, uh, Hazel? You coming?”

“No.” Hazel rumbled. “I’d rather stay.”

Qrow assessed the situation, wondering what Hazel was planning and whether he cared to stop him. Eventually, he shrugged. “Fair enough. Thanks for… being reasonable.”

“Thank you for enlightening me.”

He flipped the sign on the door to say ‘closed’ and stepped out into the fresh evening air. As the door closed behind him, he couldn’t help but smile, small and persistent. He made his way around the building to the parking lot, where almost everyone was gathering around the two cars. There was now also a red motorcycle back here, which Raven had approached and rested her helmet on the seat of, having handed the binder off to James. He caught Yang staring at her from afar.

“Uncle Qrow?” Ruby called.

“Yeah, I’m here!” He made his way over, and she almost jumped into his arms, making him stumble backwards. Yang following her almost knocked him over entirely, but he laughed and hugged them both tightly. “It’s alright, it’s alright! We’re all fine!”

“You did so good! You were so brave!”

“I just did what I had to. You two were pretty great yourselves.” He ruffled both girls' hair. “Especially with Raven. You really had her figured out.” He told Yang.

She shrugged and glanced at her mother. “Maybe I know her better than I thought. Are you gonna talk to her?”

Qrow looked over; Raven was making no effort to leave. “Yeah. I guess so. She was looking for me, after all. You two get in the car, I’ll be right back.”

The girls left to get into the backseat of the car, and Qrow looked over see Winter hug Weiss, then set off walking out of the parking lot with Amber. On the other side of his own car, Ozpin was hugging Oscar tightly. Qrow decided to let them be for a moment, and walked across the asphalt to where Raven was still standing beside her bike, arms folded.

“Hey.” He said quietly, trying not to act guarded. The adrenaline was wearing off, and he was trembling with the weight of everything. All of his recent interactions with his sister had been less-than-friendly, but something in the air between them had changed. He had seen her vulnerable for the first time in years, and he hoped it would make her open to talking.

She didn’t reply, but looked up and nodded.

“I thought you wanted to talk to me.”

“I did. But… I wanted to talk about Yang.”

“Sure. You wanna tell me why you hung up on her when she tried to call you?”

Raven’s eyes widened momentarily, and she frowned. “She told you about that.” She sounded more upset at being caught than regretful.

“Yeah. Same as I told her what you said to me on the phone a few weeks back.”

“You really tell each other everything. How sweet.”

“It’s not _sweet_ , Raven. We’re family. That’s what we do.”

She sighed. “Well, then perhaps that isn’t the kind of family I belong in. The family I remember would fight for each other and then give one another some space.”

“The family you remember was all blood, no bond.” Qrow growled. “If you want that, maybe it’s best you didn’t stick around to raise Yang.”

“Maybe it was.” Raven uncrossed her arms and stepped forward in a familiar challenging stance. “So, does that mean you won’t let me talk to her?”

“You can talk to her whenever you want. She called you. You have her number. I won’t stop you if Yang wants to talk to you, too. But listen…” He took a deep breath, searching for sensitive words he normally wouldn’t bother with for her sake. “You need to decide if you really want to be in her life or not. You can’t duck in and out whenever you feel like it, you can’t disappear for years with no contact and expect things to be fine when you come back. That’s not parenting. You need to either leave, and stay gone, or stay in contact permanently. Stop getting her hopes up and then crushing them.”

Raven regarded him steadily for a moment, all the fight going out of her posture. “I don’t think I can stay.”

“You don’t have to stay. Just be regular. Keep in touch.”

“No, that’s what I mean. I just… can’t do that.”

Qrow sighed. “Then don’t. But if you’re gonna talk to Yang, it’s your responsibility to make that clear to her.” He shook his head. “I’m not gonna tell her that her mom’s not coming home, not again.”

“Fine.” She nodded and went to turn away, but paused. “Good luck with everything.”

“There’s no such thing as luck. Just hard work and self-reflection.” He forced his voice to soften. “But thanks. Safe journey home.”

“Thanks.” She turned to her bike and tossed her hair ready to put on her helmet, and Qrow turned away.

The group across the parking lot had dissipated, one of the cars already gone, but a tall, silver-haired figure still stood there.

Qrow couldn’t help smiling again as he approached Ozpin, and saw it reflected in his face before they collided in a hug so tight it took his breath away. A motorcycle engine roared into life behind him and peeled away, and Qrow finally had time to reflect on their victory, on the hectic terror of the last hour and the fact that they had won. He laughed into Ozpin’s shoulder, high-pitched and almost hysterical.

_They had won._

They pulled apart and Qrow looked up into Ozpin’s face, his smile immediately falling into an expression of worry at the sight of the cut on his right cheekbone, the trickle of dried blood underneath. “Oh my god, Oz. You-”

“I’m fine.” Ozpin shook his head, still smiling. “I _will be_ fine. It’s just a nick, it’ll heal.”

“Well, still, you need to clean that up when we get back to your place, there’s blood.”

“Oh, we’re going back to my place, are we?”

“Well, shit, yeah, we’ve gotta celebrate, right?”

“I think we should.” Ozpin’s smile grew again, and he rested his free hand on Qrow’s waist. “You’ve done so well.” There was an emotional creak in his voice.

“We _all_ did well.” Qrow corrected, reaching up to touch Ozpin’s uninjured cheek. “You were brave, and I’m proud of you.”

“And I you.” Oz murmured.

He dropped his cane and closed the space between them, kissing Qrow warmly and so passionately that for a moment he was worried about the car full of kids next to them. He melted into it, let go of weeks’ worth of tension and anxiety, and allowed himself to simply _live_ for a moment. The world was all hot breath and soft skin, and then someone wolf-whistled from the car. Qrow broke off to see Yang grinning through the back window and had to resist the urge to flip her off.

“Perhaps we should go.” Ozpin chuckled.

“Yeah, I guess so. Onward and upward.” Qrow picked up his cane and handed it over. “You wanna pick up dinner on the way back? My treat.”

“That would be lovely. After everything else today, I don’t quite feel like cooking.”

They got into the car to the sound of excitable chatting and teasing from Ruby and Yang, and quiet laughter from Oscar. Qrow made sure everyone was wearing their seatbelts, and they set off, through what passed for rush hour traffic in Vale. He was starting to feel muscle aches from his day-long tension, but he felt that he was floating above that, barely in his physical body at all as he reflected on the conflict.

Not everything had gone to plan, and not everything would. He knew that getting Salem to stick to her end of the bargain would be a nightmare, and he had no idea if Cinder would be back. The bar was a mess now, and he had no doubt Salem would leave that for him to fix, as well as letting him pick up all kinds of financial issues. He didn’t want to run the bar the way it was at the moment, which meant he’d have to close it down for a while, take another job and work on The Gold Bar in his free time to get it to a place where he’d be happy with it.

It was all reckless, and extremely hopeful.

But Qrow had ideas, the skills to back them up, and the willingness to work hard to make them reality. He was getting help, he had his family behind him, and he had a partner who would stand beside him through anything. At the end of an uphill battle, there was always the other side of the hill. Things would get easier. He was willing to do what he had to do to see that happen.


	36. A Rainbow After Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow keeps Salem in check, but he has his family to focus on, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God I can't believe how close we are to the end of this thing. There's more stuff about Ruby's birthday in here, which as I've said before, is wrong but I don't care. Also, halfway through writing this chapter, I stopped and read two Discworld books and I'm pretty sure it's affected my writing style (hopefully in a good way!)

Qrow would not have said he was pleased to have his cynicism proven right yet again; it was hard to be smug about being correct when that meant being subject to violent tirades from his ex-boss. But it was getting harder and harder to take Salem seriously as each tantrum made her seem more like a spoiled child screaming for a perceived injustice. All the fear had drained out of confronting her, and he couldn’t even bring himself to be angry: Her behaviour was just sad, and darkly funny in a way.

He visited the closed-down Gold Bar on Wednesday as he’d promised, in the early evening with James at his side. He still had his key from when he’d been employed, and let them in; Salem had never bothered to change the locks. The main room of the bar was mostly empty when they walked in, just a few boxes scattered around, one on the bar almost completely filled with glassware. He’d been under the impression Salem would leave that behind, but if she wanted to take it, so be it. It was a minor expense compared to everything else.

They found her in the office, packing papers and records into two huge boxes, one marked ‘BURN’ in her scratchy handwriting. Qrow laughed and vetoed her idea immediately, sending her back to the main room with James to sign the lease transference paperwork he’d brought with him. For a moment it looked like she would fight to stay, but after chewing her lip staring at the boxes, she eventually followed James out. Qrow closed the door behind them and searched through her burn box. Some of it was indeed trash, but all of the employee records were in there. He left them there; he would take both boxes away and sort them in time. For now, he continued packing everything up with no organisation.

He found himself smiling at nothing as he worked, thinking about his plans for the bar. He wasn’t yet exactly sure what he would do with the place, and it would be a while before it could reopen. In the meantime, he’d been offered the job at The Albatross, and had graciously accepted to start on Monday. There was not as much money to pour into the place as he’d really like. But he was still due a severance from Salem, and outside of taking care of himself and the girls, The Gold Bar was the only sensible place for his money to go.

He would change the menus, he knew that for sure; they were far too extensive for any chef to be good at any one part of them. And the stupid new cocktail menu needed to go, too; Qrow was certain Salem had only updated it to spite him. On top of that, the bar needed more employees: Expecting two or three people to run the kitchen through twelve hour shifts was not uncommon for this type of venue, but Qrow knew how stressful those hours were. And he didn’t want anyone to be working that long on the bar, either.

Then there was the interior, far too dark for what was marketing itself as a classy establishment, far too cutesy to appeal to the kind of person who liked a dark bar. The place needed to decide what it was, and Salem had never been able to do that. But Qrow, Qrow knew what he wanted, and he knew the regulars who would come back to see what was up when they reopened. He knew the place needed to be fresh and sharp, busy enough to turn a profit, slow enough that they had time to talk. It was not going to be easy to achieve, but a few of his regulars had been by even in the last few days to see what had happened. They’d be back no matter what.

A further terse conversation with Salem taught him that she’d reluctantly signed the lease over, with James as witness. He packed up the last of the documents and they carried them back to James’s car, leaving Salem to finish up for the day. They rode back to the apartment, mostly silent, and Qrow couldn’t help but smile in the passenger seat. The worst was over. Salem would be out of town within two weeks. After that, it was all him, The Gold Bar was all his, and the world, or at least Vale, was his oyster.

But in the meantime, it was Ruby’s birthday tomorrow. That was more important than all the bars in the world.

* * *

 

There was little time to celebrate on the Thursday, with both girls busy with school. Qrow wished Ruby a happy birthday at breakfast, though, and had her unwrap gifts: a red, swing-skirt dress from Yang; a few high fantasy books and an oversized bar of chocolate from Qrow; and a package from Tai that had arrived only yesterday, containing a lengthy handwritten letter, and a silver locket engraved with a cross. The photo of Qrow and Tai with a young Ruby and Yang on their shoulders inside made Ruby squeal with delight, the opposing portrait of Summer making her hug the locket to her chest.

She wore it for the rest of the day, almost dangling it into her cake when she blew out the candles after dinner that evening. Both she and Yang were still bouncing off the walls well into the night, and Qrow knew they would continue to do so until the real celebration on Saturday. For now, he made a point to put down the files and folders from The Gold Bar he’d been sorting through all day, and sat down with them to watch a movie. But while Qrow could at least sit still, he too was excited for the weekend, to see them this happy all over again.

* * *

 

He was thankful to be woken up early on Saturday morning by Ruby crowing with delight in the girls’ bedroom. The words were indecipherable but he could understand her excitement through the walls. He smirked to himself as he blinked blearily back to life from a dream he couldn’t remember the details of. All he remembered was Ozpin and a wide-eyed smile, something he echoed himself. Today really did feel hopeful like that.

He got out of bed and showered, and by the time he entered the kitchen for breakfast at nine-thirty, both girls were waiting for him in the living room, fully dressed. They were chatting loudly, talking over one another at times, about the planned party this afternoon, everything from music to the décor Ruby wanted, from the invitees to the food. Much of it was organised already, and as he ate breakfast, Qrow found himself suddenly grateful for both their friends and his: Winter and Weiss had agreed to host Ruby’s party in the Schnee house ballroom. Everything was going incredibly smoothly so far.

But there was one more thing to do before the real celebration started.

Qrow drove them to Patch when he’d eaten, bypassing the old house again to take the shorter route to the cemetery. None of them spoke as they walked up to the familiar grave, the marble and the engraved rose and the words of Thomas Moore.

He felt oddly alive as he faced the grave in the thin morning sun.

He said a brief greeting for all of them, then he and Ruby walked around the cemetery while Yang spoke to Summer alone, up and down the rows of graves in their winter coats.

“So,” He began, hands tucked deep into his jacket pockets. “How’s being sixteen treating you so far?”

Ruby shrugged. “Well, it’s pretty much the same as being fifteen.” She looked up at Qrow. “When do you start feeling like an adult?”

He thought for a while as they walked, boots kicking through overgrown dew-laden grass a little too close to the fence. “I don’t know. I’ll let you know when it happens to me.”

“You really don’t feel like you grew up?”

“Kid, to tell you the truth, I feel a lot like I did when I was eighteen, just with more of an idea how to handle responsibility. I think almost everyone does.” He sighed. “Growing up is a myth. You get older, and you can act like the ‘adult’ society wants you to, or… you can keep having fun.”

“Not both?” She looked at him with a disappointed expression.

“Not in my experience.” His cynical half-smile quickly changed into something more genuine. “But you know, you’ve never been one to do things exactly like someone else. And I’m not saying you can’t be responsible _and_ have fun. What I mean is… no one’s ever exactly sure what they’re doing. Not even me, or your dad. Even your mom wasn’t. You might as well enjoy yourself while you figure out what you can.”

Ruby’s smile was bright as they rounded the corner of a row of graves to walk back downhill. “I guess you’re right. I never thought about how… How you all must have felt just like me once upon a time.”

He glanced over at her again, hopeful silver eyes the spitting image of her mother’s at her age, and nodded. “We sure did. Nearly everyone you ever meet will feel the same.”

“Even… Even my friends’ parents? And teachers? And... Oh! Even Professor Ozpin?”

Qrow chuckled. “Yeah, even him. Not that I think he’d ever admit it.”

They ran into Yang coming uphill to meet them, and Ruby sprinted back to Summer’s grave by herself. Yang fell into step at Qrow’s side and they continued to walk the same path. Neither made to speak for a few moments, and he paid attention to her body language. She walked with her head up, large strides in step with his, unfaltering. Still, he thought it best to make sure.

“You alright?” He asked.

She spun to look at him and laughed slightly. “Yeah, sorry. Just thinking.”

“Oh yeah? About what?”

“Just stuff. The future and all that.”

“What about the future?”

“God, can’t a girl just think without being interrogated?” She rolled her eyes and smirked. “Actually, I was thinking about you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Well, you and Ozpin.”

“Oh.”

“Do you think you’re gonna stick with him?”

“Jesus, you kids ask a lot of questions about commitment.” He paused, awkwardly scratching his head as he walked. “I mean, hopefully. But it’s… relationships don’t just spring into being overnight, and…” He trailed off, unable to bring himself to truly say yes, just as unable to outright lie. “Why do you wanna know, anyway?”

“Well, like I said. I’m thinking about the future. I mean, what happens next, after the school year’s over? Dad will come home for the summer, I guess, but he doesn’t have anywhere to stay except your place. And then what happens if… if you move in with Ozpin or whatever? Where do Ruby and I go?”

“Alright, listen. If… If it does come to that, I’m not gonna put Oz before you two. And I know he’d understand that. While you two need somewhere to live, I’ll make sure _I_ stay somewhere that’s accessible. I promised you and your dad, and this thing doesn’t change that.”

She nodded stoically. “Alright. Thanks.”

He considered her question again, and his own answer. “While we’re talking about the future, I wanna ask you something, too.”

Yang seemed to sense where the conversation was going and visibly slumped. “Ugh, god, please don’t.”

“I’m not gonna lecture you. I know how many times you’ve had this conversation with teachers.”

“And Dad, and my counsellor, and Ruby, and most of my friends, and the guidance counsellor, _twice_.”

“Yeah, okay. Well, have it with me one more time. What’s your next step after you graduate?”

“I don’t know.” She grumbled, and kicked a clump of wet grass in frustration. Dew showered her legs, leaving spatter pattern up her jeans. “I don’t wanna go to college, not yet. Maybe not ever, I don’t know. I just wanna… see the world. Do something new.”

“I get that. And you don’t have to go to college to be successful, whatever anyone tells you. Especially if you’re interested in how things work, you might wanna go to trade school or something instead. Or just get straight into working.”

“I think that’s what I would like best. I just wanna get a job and build up some cash so I can do more stuff I like.”

“Well, that’s a great idea. What kinda thing do you want to do?”

“No idea. But I’m happy to start from the bottom and work my way up.”

“Right.” Qrow wondered for a moment what kind of job Yang would excel in. She was good under pressure, adapted quickly, and had a positive attitude without being a doormat: All great traits to have in many work environments. “Well, a lot of kids your age start in retail. It’s pretty hard work but it’s work, and if you find the right place it can be rewarding enough to make up for the idiots you meet. Or hospitality, you could try waitressing or barista work. Even a kitchen if you wanted, but from my experience, I wouldn’t recommend that.”

A strange look came over Yang’s face and she turned to smirk at him. “Don’t _you_ need new kitchen workers at the bar when you reopen it?”

“Well, yeah, but-”

“So why don’t you help me get a job there?”

“You’re assuming a lot.” He sighed. “But you’re right, we do need more people in the kitchen. I can’t just hire you outright, though, that’s not fair, you’d have to… go through the process. Make a resume and stuff.”

“Fine. It’s gotta be good practice, right?”

“I guess so.” He shrugged and looked over to find her smiling hopefully. “Look, I wanna give Amber and Winter their jobs back if they want them. After that… I’ll definitely give you the opportunity, if you still want it by then. But I can’t make any promises on the job. It wouldn’t be fair.”

“Sure, okay. If I don’t get it, will you give me a list of other places in town that might want me?”

Qrow smiled. “Yeah, that I can promise.”

They strolled in silence for a few more minutes before Yang spoke again.

“You know, Mom tried calling me last night.” She said levelly.

“Oh. Really?” Qrow replied, not actually asking. “What’d you say?”

“I didn’t say anything. I hung up on her.”

He glanced over, and whatever he’d been expecting to see, it wasn’t the smirk she was wearing. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Figured she should get a taste of her own medicine.”

“Not a bad idea. Maybe it’ll do her good.” He smirked back. “Don’t ever feel obligated to talk to her. She’s only doing this to make herself feel better.”

“Believe me, I know. Lesson learned.”

Qrow nodded. “I’m glad you’re alright, Firecracker. You’re stronger than Raven any day.”

“You know it.”

Ruby came running up to them from behind a few moments later, jumping up to grab Qrow’s shoulders and making him stumble, earning a yelp of surprise from Yang. Their giggling and roughhousing was endearing, but Qrow was worried about how their joy looked in the cemetery. He asked them to make their way back to the car as he made his own private trip back to Summer’s grave.

They’d replaced the dead flowers in the vase with a new bouquet of assorted red and yellow blooms, and he bent to rearrange them a little, then placed his hand on the stone as he had the last time he’d been here. It had been less than a month; he couldn’t believe how quickly everything had changed.

He straightened up and cleared his throat. There were others milling around the cemetery today, but none were close enough to hear him.

“Hey again, Summer. I just wanted to say thanks. Uh… Last time I was here things weren’t great, and… I came to you hoping for answers. I don’t know why, and I didn’t get any, but being able to just… let all that stuff out really helped me. And now all of that stuff is… Maybe not resolved, but on its way there. It’s getting better. _I’m_ getting better.  
“I’ve been trying to clean up the mess I’ve left behind, and the mess other people leave while I’m at it. Trying to pay back my bad karma. I already know how hard it’s going to be, but I don’t think it matters anymore. I’m… looking forward to it.” He almost laughed, breathless. “You know how unusual that is for me. And… You know, everyone’s doing okay. The kids are healthy, and I’ve rebuilt some bridges. Really important bridges. That’s all that matters now.”

He took a deep breath, and found himself smiling at nothing as he brought his gaze back down to the white marble. “You’d be proud of us. I used to hope you would be, and I still do, but… I _know_ you would. You’d be proud of how brave Tai’s been, and how smart and thoughtful Yang is, and how Ruby still tries to make everyone’s lives brighter. And I like to think you’d be proud of how far I’ve come.” He paused. “We’re all proud of you, too. You did great. We miss you, and we love you. We always will.”

For one final moment, he allowed himself a painful memory, her last words to him the night she had died.

_‘You’re a disaster, Qrow.’_

And he was, and he had been, and he still would be, but not in the same ways. And that was the important part.

He thought, strangely, of the silver locket Ruby was still wearing, and swallowed the knot out of his throat. “Bye, Summer. We’ll be back for Yang’s eighteenth, but… You’re always with us.”

One more deep breath, and he turned away from the grave, back down the row of stones and towards the path that led to the entrance. A small smile crept onto his face, and he thought about love and home and family as he made his way back to the car.

* * *

 

They made their way up to the Schnee house in the early afternoon, Qrow’s car so stuffed with decorations and food that Yang was squashed against the door in the backseat. Ruby sat in shotgun with a cake box in her lap, fidgeting against Qrow’s strict instructions not to open it. As he followed Ruby’s distracted directions, he was thankful that the other decorations and the sound system were being handled by the Schnees themselves: his poor little hatchback wouldn’t handle anything else.

The Schnee house was tucked away at the top of a hill, situated not far from James’s house at the northern end of town. The gravel driveway was a mile long and surrounded by acres of exquisite lawns, hedges, and neatly trimmed shrubs that probably burst into bloom in warmer weather. Qrow did his best not to roll his eyes at the excess, even as they pulled up to the house itself. He would have called it a mansion. The girls had been right: It was huge.

His view of the Schnees was yet further sharpened and soured when the door was answered by a stout, moustached man who introduced himself as Klein, the butler. He finally couldn’t restrain an eye roll behind the man’s back as he led them to the ballroom, through yards of stark white corridors occasionally furnished with an uncomfortable-looking chair, a piece of minimalist artwork, or a family portrait in which everyone looked miserable.

Finally, though, they were shown into the ballroom, and there was air in the room that didn’t seem to be mostly made up of disinfectant. It was bright and open inside, and the furniture was already set up. A long table spanned the wall at the far-right end of the room, and several small round tables with chairs clustered nearby, leaving a large dancefloor space. At the other end, a sound system with huge speakers stood quiet and ready to be used. Qrow had to admit it was better than anything he could have come up with alone, or afforded at all.

Such were the benefits of having rich friends.

Weiss and Winter stood on two stepladders at either side of a tall window that gave views of the ocean, holding up each end of a banner that read ‘Happy Birthday!’ in red and gold. They turned as the door opened, and Weiss immediately dropped her end of the banner.

“Ruby!” She cried. “I’m so glad you’re here!”

“Weiss!” Winter chided, but Weiss was already down from the stepladder, running across the vast blue-tiled floor to meet them.

“Hey, I’m here too.” Yang protested half-heartedly, but she was grinning.

“Of course you are, but it’s Ruby’s birthday. She deserves some special treatment.” Weiss smiled and took the cake box from Ruby’s hands. “Is this the cake? Where should I put it?”

“It should be the centrepiece, right?” Ruby asked. “But Uncle Qrow said not to open it yet.”

Weiss ran over to the long table where the food would go and set the box in the centre. Qrow’s attention was caught by Winter, climbing down from the other stepladder and leaving the banner only half-pinned. He turned to the girls as Weiss returned to them.

“Hey, why don’t you three start bringing everything else in? I’ll help Winter out with the decorating.” He held up his car keys to Yang. “Lock it when you’re done, will you?”

“Sure.” Yang took the keys and turned away, Ruby and Weiss quickly following her out.

Qrow turned to Winter, now approaching him across the dancefloor, and tried for a friendly smile. It came out awkward. “Hey.”

“Good afternoon.” She barely half-smiled, but it was something. She looked straight-laced even in what were clearly house-clothes, shorts over tights and a thick winter sweater. Her hair was back in its usual tight bun. “Did you bring the rest of the decorations?”

“Yeah, the kids’ll bring them back. It’s just the garlands and fairy lights Ruby wanted, nothing huge.”

“Good. And you really want to help me put them up?”

He shrugged. “Figure you could use someone taller than Weiss.”

She smirked and nodded. “Fine. I appreciate it.”

“It’s no problem. And, uh… Thanks for helping us set all this stuff up. Wouldn’t have been able to do anything like this without you.”

“You should be thanking my father. If he and Whitley weren’t out of town, I wouldn’t even be allowed into the house.” Her smile got thin and bitter.

“Yeah. I’m sorry, Winter.”

“It’s fine. I’ve proven that I can live perfectly happily without his help. That’s all I really need.”

Qrow nodded. “The best revenge is a life well-lived, or something.” He paused. “Hey, are you sticking around to help watch the kids, or do you have to leave?”

“I’ll stay. I know what Weiss and her friends are like; I’m sure you’ll need some help.”

“Yeah, we could definitely use it. The Belladonnas are coming, though, and James and Ozpin. Don’t feel like you _have_ to stay.”

Winter shook her head and looked around the room. “The only thing I’ve ever seen this ballroom used for is very official parties where my father was trying to impress someone. It might be nice to see people actually having fun here.” She looked back to Qrow. “Anyway, let’s get on with things. We don’t have all day.”

“Wait, one more question.” Qrow stopped her and then hesitated. “When I get The Gold Bar set up again… Would you like your job back?”

She blinked for a moment, seemingly surprised into silence. “I didn’t know that was an option.”

“Winter, you’re one of the hardest working people I’ve ever met. I’d employ you again in an instant. But only if you really want me to. You have to bear in mind it’ll be… about two months until I get everything in order to reopen.”

“Well…” She hesitated. “Yes, I’d like my job back. But only if you reduce the length of my shifts.”

“Already thinking about that. I’d like to cut it back to eight or nine hours.”

“Good. And I want you to offer Amber the same thing.”

“I will. You can tell her yourself, if you want.”

She gave him an assessing stare that was somewhat like an ice cube being dropped down the back of his shirt. Finally, she nodded. “Then yes. I’ll take my job back.”

“Great. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now can we _please_ put these banners up?”

* * *

 

The afternoon quickly became a bustle of activity as Qrow and Winter finished hanging the decorations and the kids took charge of setting out the food. It wasn’t long before others started arriving: Blake and her parents had offered to come early to help out, and Oscar and Ozpin weren’t far behind. They were both carrying large containers, which they put down on the food table where Ruby directed as Qrow scrambled down from the stepladder.

He hurried over as Ozpin uncovered a tray of neat chocolate cupcakes and a tin of the chocolate chip cookies Ruby had loved so much before. Her eyes lit up and she looked up at Ozpin in awe.

“You really made these for me, Professor?”

“I did.” He smiled. “Happy birthday, Miss Rose.”

"Thank you!" She flapped her hands excitedly in a manner that Qrow knew meant she wanted to hug him but didn’t dare. Instead, she turned to Oscar. “Thank you, too, Oscar!”

“Oh, well, I-” He was cut off by Ruby’s arms wrapping around his neck.

Qrow placed a hand on Ozpin’s shoulder and smiled as he turned to look at him. “Hey. How’s it going?”

“Very well, thank you.” They embraced. “I hope I didn’t disturb you from what you were doing?”

“No, no, we were done anyway.” Qrow backed up and looked around the room, now hung with garlands of tinsel and fairy lights that glowed in red and white amongst the birthday banners. “And thanks for bringing something along. You didn’t have to.”

“Of course not, but I know Ruby has a sweet tooth.” He smiled, but it faded quickly. He pulled Qrow back a little from where the kids were crowded around the table and lowered his voice. “How are negotiations going with Salem?”

“Not as bad as you’re imagining, I promise.” Qrow shook his head. “She’s had a couple of tantrums, but nothing dangerous. I told you she turned over the deed, didn’t I?”

“Yes. I just worry that it won’t mean anything.”

“Believe me, she’s not doing any harm. She’s on her own now. That guy, Arthur, came in once but as soon as he saw James he left. Must be pretty familiar with local government. It’s just Salem shut up in the bar trying not to incriminate herself any further while she saves her own ass.”

“I still worry about you both.”

“Yeah. I understand.” Qrow rested his hand on Ozpin’s lower back, trying to subtly comfort him. “If you want, you could come with us next Saturday and see her off. If it’d help you feel like… she’s not a threat anymore.”

Ozpin frowned and shook his head. “I think that would be better left to those with a better poker face than me.”

Qrow smirked. “Yeah, you’re no good at pretending. I’ll keep you updated, though. Anyway, d’you wanna sit down while we finish up? Winter’s set up the ‘adult table’ in the corner next to the food.”

“Ah, wonderful.” Oz perked up immediately. “No better place, in my opinion.”

Qrow watched him walk away with a smile, then went to help Winter take away the stepladders before doing a double take.

Ozpin hadn’t brought his cane.

* * *

 

More guests trickled in, until by the time the party was scheduled to start, almost everyone who had been invited had arrived. A sizeable pile of gifts had built up on the table behind the adults, and now James had joined the small party-within-a-party that crowded around. Ruby started the music, which consisted of a day-long playlist she and Weiss had cultivated from the suggestions of almost all of their friends. The lights were dimmed, and it wasn’t long before food and drinks started being passed around.

Winter offered alcoholic drinks to the parents' table, and Qrow took half a shot of whiskey to mix with some of the apple juice from the pitcher. He volunteered to be one of the first to watch over the kids, and wandered over to lean on the wall near the door, tapping his foot to the music. He couldn’t say most of the kids’ choices were much to his taste, but there was a good beat to most of it, and he could see them all enjoying themselves.

It wasn’t long before Yang appeared in front of him, with Blake clinging to her hand. She wriggled away with wide eyes as Yang spoke to Qrow.

“Hey, you wanna dance with us?” She asked.

“Uh… Sure, but I’m no good at it.” Qrow warned, sipping his drink.

“Oh, who cares? It’s a party, let loose a little!”

He sighed. “Yeah alright. Don’t leave your friends out, though.”

Yang grinned and grabbed his arm, then gestured for Blake to take her hand again and pulled them both out to the dancefloor. Qrow tried to remember how to dance: He hadn’t seriously tried in about eight years, and he’d never been much good at it. But as he watched Yang and Blake do some sort of trendy dance that barely even looked familiar to him, he knew it wasn’t looking good that mattered. He took Yang’s hand and spun her around, then let go as she passed the spin on to Blake. They laughed, and he could feel his face red with embarrassment at being so useless in the dim room, but didn’t mind.

He couldn’t keep up for long before he went back to his spot at the side of the room, almost being knocked over on the way by the kid with the blond spiky hair: Sun, was that his name? He and his blue-haired friend were spinning each other around with such force they knocked Qrow’s cup out of his hand. They stared at him like he was going to kill them, apologising over each other, but Qrow just laughed and told them to watch the spot so no one slipped while he fetched some paper towels.

After nearly an hour, he switched places with the Belladonnas, and Winter went to fetch the balcony keys for a few kids who wanted to go outside to escape the warmth rising in the room. Qrow took a seat beside Ozpin, opposite Ironwood, feeling surprisingly sweaty in his neat shirt. He wrapped his left arm around Oz and rested his head on his shoulder. He wished they could dance together, but this wasn’t the time or place; rumours could be quiet little dangers if they spread around the school.

“I can’t keep up with teenagers anymore.” He grumbled.

“Never teach.” Ozpin advised him.

“Believe me, I’m not going to.” He yawned. “Can’t believe you deal with everyone here on a daily basis.”

“You act like they’re difficult children.”

“Nah. Just… energetic.”

“You know, I don’t find Penny that hard to keep up with.” James offered. His eyes were firmly on Qrow and Ozpin.

“Think yourself lucky, you old fuck.” Qrow fired back.

James’s gaze flicked up over Qrow’s head, and he turned to follow it. The up-tempo song that had been playing as he sat down had been replaced with something a little slower and more romantic. James was watching Penny, and by extension Ruby, as they danced hand in hand, mint green shift dress contrasting with dark red swing skirt.

Qrow smiled as he looked away. “So, how’s it going with getting Penny into Beacon?” He asked.

James shrugged evasively with a hint of a smirk. “You’ll have to ask Ozpin that.”

He sat up straight and looked at him. “Well?”

Ozpin made time to give both of them a withering look before answering. “Since this is not an official meeting, I suppose I can say… Penny will get into Beacon without a problem. I’m only running checks on her past assignments for the sake of administration. Her GPA is consistently good enough for her to do fantastically at Beacon.” He smiled, small and honest and not with the face of the principal. “We’ll be glad to have her.”

Qrow found himself smiling too. “That’s great. Isn’t that great?” He asked James.

James nodded. “It is. And… I imagine a lot of people will be glad to have her.” His gaze went to the dancefloor again, and this time Qrow didn’t need to turn to look.

“Yeah. I think so.”

Qrow couldn’t bring himself to separate from Ozpin, even as more of his students came up to the food table to serve themselves dinner on floral-patterned paper plates. A few of those who already knew one or the other of them even stopped to chat. For his part, Ozpin didn’t seem at all bothered, calmly talking to everyone who approached with Qrow’s head on his shoulder and hand on his waist.

Eventually, it was Ren and Nora who walked over, each with plates piled with food. Ren’s was mostly salad, whereas Nora seemed to be sampling all available desserts at once. Nora launched into telling Ozpin how cool it was that he baked and how great these cupcakes were, and Qrow shared a smirk with Ren. There was no surprise that Nora and Ruby were such good friends. Something clicked in his head and he sat up away from Ozpin to talk to him.

“Hey, Ren?”

“Uh, yes?” Ren looked a little flustered at having been addressed.

“Sorry, I know we haven’t talked much, but… You know I used to work with your mom, right?”

“Yes. At The Gold Bar.”

“Right. Well, uh… She didn’t get her last pay check when she moved to her new job and I know it’s been on her mind. Could you tell her that it’s on its way to her?”

“Oh… Yes, of course.” He paused. “She said she wasn’t ever expecting to get it.”

“Well, I talked to her old boss. I got her to wire the money, and it’ll probably get to her on Monday.”

“Right. That’s great. Thank you.”

“It’s nothing, kid.” Qrow waved a hand. “Just tell her I said hi, and that I hope she’s doing well, will you?”

Nora dragged Ren away not long after, and Ozpin turned to Qrow with an expression of incredulity on his face.

“You actually made Salem pay An back for her missing pay check?”

“More than that: She wired Winter and Amber’s too. That reminds me, I forgot to let Winter know.” He scanned the dancefloor for her, but was quickly brought back to the table.

“Doesn’t that lose you a big part of your case against her?” James asked.

“Well, not exactly.” Qrow smirked. “I got her to trade those three pay checks for my severance. But that won’t get her out of the fact she broke my employment contract. Everybody wins.”

“So… are you going to law enforcement about her or not? I don’t feel like even _you_ know what you’re going to do next.”

“Oh, I’m going to the cops. What am I, an idiot? I’ll just wait until she’s out of town.”

“You didn’t tell me that was your plan!” Ozpin exclaimed.

“No, I didn’t.” Qrow pulled a guilty face. “Sorry. Do you mind?”

“No! Not at all. I think that’s very sensible.” He shook his head. “I do wish you had told me, though. I’ve been worrying for days. Knowing that was your plan all along does put my mind at ease.”

“Right, yeah. Sorry, Oz. I should’ve said.”

“Forget it.” Ozpin placed his hand over Qrow’s on the table. “I should have trusted in you. I should know by now that you’re smarter than you seem.”

“I’m gonna take that as a compliment. Thanks.”

James smirked across the table and Qrow felt fortunate to be where he was.

* * *

 

At 8 pm, Winter hurried up to the now picked-over food table with a box of matches as she and Qrow had planned. He uncovered the birthday cake, and they lit the candles one by one, until sixteen little flames danced on top. A song ended, and Weiss stopped the music so that Winter could call Ruby over in her stern, carrying voice. A small cheer went up among Ruby’s friends as she stepped forwards, her eyes widening at the sight of the cake in Qrow’s hands.

He had made it himself, with lots of trial and error and two failures beforehand, a white cake with white fondant and piped roses in as dark a red as he could manage. He couldn’t count how many tutorials he’d watched online to get the shape just right. Her name was piped in shaky handwriting between them all, almost covered up by the swarms of candles, now slowly dripping wax onto his handiwork.

They sang Happy Birthday to her, and finally Ruby blew out the candles, and only Qrow was close enough to see that her eyes were swimming with tears as she did so.

The cake was shared out, and after a while the party began to die down, those kids with strict parents starting to filter out. Oscar, seemingly exhausted by an entire evening of socialising, came to sit at the adults’ table on Ozpin’s other side. Qrow took another shift watching over everyone who was left, dancing with Ruby while Penny took a rest and letting her try to teach him the trendy dance Yang and Blake had been doing earlier. He fell over his own feet and Ruby laughed innocently, and he made sure to hug her and wish her a happy birthday yet again before he sat down.

It seemed to be over before it had really started, but 10 pm was the hard limit they had set for their use of the ballroom. They turned up the lights and turned down the music, and started to clear up as most of the rest of the kids drifted out. Ruby and Yang repeatedly disappeared out to the front of the house to see them off one by one, whilst Qrow, Winter, James, and Ozpin cleaned up. Oscar sat alone at the table with his smart shirt unbuttoned at the cuffs, playing with a paper party hat. Qrow boxed up the last of the cake, and gave James some of the cookies. All of the cupcakes and almost everything else was gone, apart from a few sandwiches and half a bowl of salad.

James packed up ready to go, and went to find Penny; she’d gone to see off the Belladonnas with Ruby and Yang and Weiss. Qrow said a brief goodbye, then went back to wiping down the food table.

“And you’re sure you don’t want me to take down the banners and stuff before I go?” He asked Winter.

She shook her head. “I’ll do it tomorrow. Father’s not back in town until Monday.”

“Oh. Well, as long as you’re sure.”

“Completely, thank you. You can come and fetch your lights tomorrow evening.”

Qrow shrugged and kept working, packing up all the containers he’d brought with him and carefully wrapping the leftovers in aluminium foil. It wasn’t long before Yang barged back into the ballroom, Ruby close behind, shouting at the top of her lungs:

“I got a date!”

Qrow burst out laughing at her demeanour without thinking. “Yeah?”

“Yeah!” She said indignantly, running over with her flats seeming to almost trip her at every step. “With Penny! Next Friday!”

He softened, realising he might have offended her without meaning to. “That’s great, kiddo. But… you don’t think she might mind you telling everyone around?”

Weiss burst into the ballroom. “Ruby has a crush on Penny!” She cried.

“Yep!” Ruby agreed happily. “Do you need any help, Uncle Qrow?”

“Nah, we’re almost done.” He paused and wondered what to say, struggled for words until he found something that sounded right. “I’m happy for you, kid. Just remember what I said about treating her right, won’t you?”

“I will!” She smiled. “Thank you.”

Qrow sent the three girls to the car with the first few containers, and Winter hurried after them with a forgotten lid. He was left alone with Ozpin and Oscar, who was now carefully unravelling and refolding his paper hat into a different shape. Ozpin sensed the moment and walked over quickly.

“We’ll be leaving soon.” He said quietly. “Thank you for having us.”

“Oh, don’t, it’s nothing. Thanks for bringing something along. Thanks for being here.”

“You know it’s my pleasure.” He glanced at Oscar, who yawned hugely as if on cue. “Anyway, as much as Oscar wanted to come, he wouldn’t have done so without me.”

“Yeah. I’m glad he did, though. I know Ruby’s pretty fond of him.”

Ozpin nodded. “And he’s very fond of her, and of Yang.” A small smile crossed his face. “We’re both very lucky the three of you arrived in our lives.”

Qrow frowned and waved a hand. “You’d have been fine without us.”

“Perhaps.” He paused. “Do you believe in fate?”

Qrow was stunned into silence for a moment, opening his mouth but no sound coming out. “Uh… Well, I guess…” He trailed off, steadied himself, and tried again. “I didn’t. But then I met you. And it’s cheesy and stupid but… If there’s anything in this world that was meant to be, it’s… it’s us.”

Ozpin smiled. “Then we’re on the same page.” He stepped forward and kissed Qrow without warning or build up, pressing their lips together with passion but without force, until Qrow saw sunlight through emerald-green leaves in his mind’s eye.

They broke off, but Ozpin’s hand stayed on Qrow’s lower back, and Qrow grabbed his other hand and entwined their fingers. “You got time for me to come see you tomorrow?”

“Yes, but… You come to my house a lot. Perhaps I should come down to see you.”

He smiled and nodded. “If you want to. I’d like that.”

“10 am?”

Qrow grimaced. “Maybe noon. I’ll make lunch.”

Ozpin rolled his eyes, but smiled. “Noon it is.”

Ruby, Yang, Weiss and Winter came running back into the ballroom, although this time there was a hint of fatigue to the girls’ excitement. Qrow and Ozpin pulled away from one another, but not frantically, and their hands didn’t part.

“Hey, Oz is going home now.” Qrow said. “Say goodbye to Oscar.”

He didn’t turn to watch, but heard Oscar get up at the sound of his name, then Ruby almost tripping over her feet again as she ran to him. There was a flustered sound as she hugged him, then another as Yang did the same.

“See you on Monday, Oscar.”

“See you again.” Weiss said politely.

Qrow finally, reluctantly, let go of Ozpin’s hand, and Oscar walked up to meet him.

“Alright. We’ll be going.” Ozpin looked down at Oscar. “You have everything you came with?”

“Yes, Dad.” Oscar replied.

“Good.” He turned his attention back to Qrow. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow. Take care.” He looked around to Ruby. “And happy birthday again, Miss Rose.”

“Thank you, Professor!” She cried after him.

They walked out of the ballroom, and Qrow turned to his nieces and the Schnees. “Alright. Who’s gonna help me bring all these presents to the car?”

They all volunteered, and each with armfuls of parcels and containers and boxes, they made their way out of the ballroom, chattering loudly in empty halls that seemed all at once colourful with life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And... that's almost it. The next chapter is an epilogue, and after that... it's done. So this is not THE ending, but maybe it's AN ending.


	37. Epilogue: Moving Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qrow's life has changed, and now there's a strange, bright future to look forward to.

Spring didn’t hurry in releasing Vale from the half-hearted grip of winter; the mild chill never quite stopped hanging over the town. But the days stretched out and grew longer, and the sun showed itself amongst the clouds more often even if its warmth was weak. The town seemed to wake up from a hibernation it hadn’t known it had been in, trees springing back into life in blots of sparkling green against the persistent concrete-grey and brick-red of the buildings. Gulls called over the beach and scavenged for scraps on the streets, fearless as ever.

It was the first real day of spring break, and the town was busier than usual, local students enjoying their freedom still wrapped up against the cold, tourists filtering in from the RV parks and campgrounds up in the hills. It was early in the evening, but bars were filling up with chilly wanderers and ahead-of-the-game partiers alike. On the wealthier side of town, one such bar was decorated as if for a birthday, paper streamers and balloons in the windows. The painted sign above the door read:

‘ **The Crow** **Bar** ’

Beneath it was a printed banner which hung primly over the entrance so as to make people pay attention:

‘ _Grand Reopening: Under New_ _Management_ ’

Inside, mismatched tables and chairs seated an array of customers, from tourists to locals, the elderly to high-schoolers, and each ate and drank from a mixture of multi-coloured tableware and glassware. Qrow took a moment to glance around the noisy room as he wiped down the bar top. He couldn’t resist smiling at the spectrum of colours, patterns, shapes, all carefully cultivated so that everything was comfortable, everything was practical, everything worked.

Chaos, but the right kind of chaos.

It had been a long time coming; Qrow had worked almost every spare minute he’d had since Salem had left town getting the bar back to working order. With all the tableware she’d taken and the furniture she’d smashed, it had been a long and expensive journey; he had had to simply buy what he could afford and it hope it worked. And of course, news had travelled, apparently straight to his boss at the Albatross. They had spent the last two months constantly at odds with one another, conflicting on scheduling at every turn. But finally, _finally_ , Qrow had quit without notice on Friday. It was a bridge he hadn’t minded burning.

He took another proud look around, at the newly painted walls, now bright enough to make the room look bigger, and accentuated with a large mirror on the far wall. He’d even paid someone to sand and polish the flooring, and switched out the dim old globe lights for warm, dimmable LED bulbs. His savings were as low as they’d been in five years, but it was money well spent. The main room hadn’t been this full since last summer.

And today, for the first time in his recent memory, he was going to clock out at 5 pm.

He packed up behind the bar, quickly hanging up his black apron, and adjusting the glass crow figurine that sat on the shelf on his left. Without thinking, he reached beneath the bar for his flask. His hand grasped at empty air on the top shelf; he hadn’t carried it in weeks. He smirked to himself and shook his head, then came out from behind the bar and walked to the office. He called his newly-employed manager out from where she was adjusting her own apron, and she took over for him behind the bar.

Qrow made his way to the kitchen, where Winter and Amber were quickly and calmly putting together a pair of meals, and Yang stood at the dishwashing station, humming to herself as she scraped and rinsed plates. He watched her for a moment, a flare of awkward pride building in his chest, before he spoke.

“Hey, Firecracker.”

She didn’t seem startled to see him, and simply turned and smiled without pausing what she was doing. “Hey. Is it that time already?”

“Yep.” He leaned on the wall by the door. “You better finish up, I think I saw your pal coming in to take your spot.”

As if on cue, the kitchen door opened, and a tall kid in kitchen whites almost ran into Qrow. He made an apologetic noise and rushed for the other sink to wash his hands.

Yang rinsed the last two dishes in her pile and followed him, soaping up her hands and drying off before grabbing her bag from the new shelf beside the cooler. Qrow had taken the old one down, and put up a new one without a crack behind it. He’d found somewhere better to hide his office key.

Finally, with goodbyes to everyone, they left the kitchen, and then the bar. He felt a little guilty: It didn’t seem right leaving _his_ bar so early on its opening day. But he’d been there since 7 am setting up for opening at nine, and he’d had this organised for weeks anyway.

They stopped on the bar forecourt, and Qrow leaned on the wall. Yang followed his lead, yawning hugely.

“How am I _so_ tired?” She asked. “I just stood in one spot all day and washed dishes.”

“Welcome to your first day of nine-to-five, kid.” Qrow replied. “You’ll get used to it.”

“How much did you say you were paying me again?”

“Minimum wage, but I told you, that’s-”

“I’m joking.” She rolled her eyes and smirked.

He sighed. “Well, anyway, how’d it go? Did you enjoy it? Were Amber and Winter okay to work with?”

“Yeah, it was pretty good. I mean… There’s not much to washing dishes except making sure you know where all the knives are.”

“True. It’s not exactly pleasant work, though.”

“Nah, but who cares about a little wet food and elbow grease?” She shrugged. “I could keep coming back.”

“Well, we’ll keep you on all spring break if that’s what you want. And you can work a few evenings after school if you like.”

“We’ll see how tough things get towards finals.” Her smile came back. “But I could come back over summer if you’ll have me.”

“That can probably be arranged.”

It wasn’t long before a familiar figure walked up, Yang spotting him first.

“Hey, Dad.” She said cheerfully.

Qrow looked up from his phone, where he was texting Ozpin, and grinned. Tai had arrived back in the country on Saturday, and they had made the long drive to Portland to fetch him again. His hair had gotten longer since his last visit in winter, and he had been smiling almost non-stop all weekend.

Tai hugged them both as if he hadn’t seen them in years. “How are you doing? How’s the bar?” He gestured towards the doors.

“It’s good, it’s going well.” Qrow nodded. “Had a few hiccups first thing this morning, but that’s what I went in early for. It’s all fine now.”

“And your new employees are all doing okay?”

“Seem to be. I did training with the ones that needed it last week and they all did well.” He paused and patted Yang’s shoulder. “This one did great in the kitchen, too.”

Yang smiled and shook him off. “Seriously, it was just washing dishes. I’m tired but it’s not _that_ hard.”

“Well, it’s your first job.” Tai disputed. “We’re glad you’re doing well, that’s all.”

“Yeah, alright. Thanks, I guess.”

“You guess?” He teased, and Yang pulled a face at him.

“So, you two have any plans for the evening, or are you just going back to the apartment?” Qrow asked.

“Well, actually, I thought I’d take Yang out for dinner.” Tai replied. “I got my name down for that nice Greek place on Main Street.”

“Whoa, really?” Yang’s eyebrows shot up. “That place is expensive!”

“Yeah, well. You and I don’t get much bonding time these days. I think it’s worth it.”

Her smile softened. “Thanks, Dad.”

Qrow got a phone call while Yang and Tai chatted, and answered it to hear a frantic Ruby apologising for being late and checking for the third time that it was okay for her to bring Penny. He reassured her, and he heard the sound of a car engine in the background that told her she was on the way.

Sure enough, five minutes later, a white SUV pulled up in front of the bar, and Ruby and Penny clambered out of the back seat, shouting thank yous. Qrow waved to James in the driver’s seat and watched him raise a gloved hand in return as he drove off.

“Sorry we’re late, we were painting and we lost track of time and then we had to wash up all the brushes and put the paint away before we left.” Ruby breezed in one breath. “Hi Dad!”

“Hey, Ruby. And hi again, Penny.”

Penny smiled shyly. “Hello again.”

“Uh, Dad, I- I actually brought Penny here for a reason.” Ruby continued. “Uh…” She twiddled her fingers, her face getting red.

“It’s alright, kid.” Qrow reassured. “We’re all here.”

“Right.” She steeled herself, then drew herself upright and grabbed Penny’s hand. “Dad. Penny’s my girlfriend. We’ve been dating for a couple of months.”

“Oh.” Tai looked like he couldn’t decide whether to fake surprise or not. “Well, that’s great! I’m… happy for both of you. Uh… Maybe before I fly back we should talk about it more, but… Obviously now’s not the time. Are you going somewhere after we’re done here?”

“Uh… Just back to the apartment.” Ruby looked bewildered at the calm reaction.

“Okay. Well... Just make sure you stay safe, okay?”

“Safe? What from?”

Yang and Qrow glanced at one another, struggling to restrain laughter. Penny leaned over and whispered something into Ruby’s ear, and both of their faces turned scarlet.

“Oh!” Ruby grimaced, and turned to scowl at her dad, who was now smirking. “You said that to embarrass me, didn’t you?”

“Maybe a little.” Tai shrugged unapologetically. “C’mon, what fun is being a dad if you can’t embarrass your kid in front of their first date?”

Ruby rolled her eyes, but Penny giggled.

“Uh, you know, now that you’re both here… I wanted to tell you all something.” Tai lowered his voice slightly, as if about to impart a secret. He hesitated.

“Well?” Yang prompted. “What’s going on?”

“You… might really like this, you might really hate it. I’ve been thinking about what I’m gonna do next year, and talking with some of my old colleagues from Signal. The principal told me the teacher they hired on to replace me is moving to another district at the end of the year, and… I could have my old job back in September if I want.” He took a deep breath. “And I said yes.”

“What?” Qrow almost dropped his phone on the asphalt. “You’re… coming back?”

“Yeah.” Tai laughed. “You know, I think I made the right decision trying out teaching overseas, but… I don’t think it’s a long term possibility for me. The money’s even worse than it is here, the city isn’t my scene, and… I miss you all. Too much to stay away. If I can get my job back, maybe I can just pick up where I left off.”

“That’s amazing!” Ruby let go of Penny to hug Tai, squeezing him tightly around the waist. “I mean, I’m sorry it didn’t work out in Qingdao, but… We miss you too!”

“What about the house?” Yang asked as Ruby withdrew. “Are we getting it back?”

Tai grimaced momentarily. “I’d like to try. I mean, it’s just being looked after by the property management company. If the renters leave when their lease is up in August… I could definitely take it back.”

“But what about… Here?” Ruby asked, a frown crossing her face as she looked over at a worried Penny. “I mean, Beacon, and Vale, and all our friends here?”

“Yeah, if I’m gonna keep working at the bar, I need to be able to get here.” Yang pointed back at The Crow Bar.

Tai opened his mouth, then closed it and frowned again before he spoke. “You know, we’ll have to think about that. Ruby, if I’ve gotta drive to Signal every day, I can bring you to Beacon, no problem. Yang…”

“I can get Yang to work.” Qrow put in. “I’m taking shorter shifts now, so I should be able to get her back again most days, too.”

“Oh. Yeah, of course, I forgot that you… can drive after your shifts now.” Tai’s eyes lit up again. “Yeah. We can make this work.”

Ruby and Penny eventually said their farewells to Tai, and set off walking back to the apartment. Yang started showing her dad photos from the last few months on her phone, and Qrow leaned on the wall and watched the clouds slowly creeping across the sky above. It was a nice evening.

There was the familiar click of cane against asphalt so close that it made him jump. When he looked down, Ozpin was standing just outside the group.

“Hey, Professor.” Yang grinned first.

“Evening, Miss Xiao Long.” Ozpin said graciously, then stepped closer to Qrow. “Evening, Qrow. Sorry I’m late.”

“Hey. Don’t worry about it.” Qrow leaned in to kiss his cheek, then rested a hand on his back to make him face Tai. “Tai, this is Ozpin. Ozpin, this is Tai.”

Ozpin switched his cane to his left hand and reached out his right towards Tai. “It’s wonderful to finally meet you.” He said. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Yeah, me too.” Tai shook his hand firmly. “Qrow talks about you all the time.”

“Ah, come on, you’re making me look uncool.” Qrow joked.

“You are uncool.” Yang replied. “You’re my Uncool Qrow.” She grinned and pointed finger guns at him.

To Qrow’s annoyance, Tai and Ozpin both laughed.

“Alright, thanks, kid.” He suppressed his own grin.

“So, what are you two gonna get up to?” Tai asked once he’d recovered from his laughter. “Anything interesting?”

“We thought we’d take advantage of the longer days and take a walk.” Ozpin replied.

“Oh, that’s a nice idea.” Tai nodded. “Have you been into the bar yet?” He inclined his head towards the door.

“I’ve been very involved with the redecorating, but I haven’t been in for a drink yet. Unfortunately, I’ve been taking care of Oscar all day; he’s a little under the weather. Otherwise I’d have come and sampled the hot cocoa again.”

“Ah, that’s a shame. Maybe when you’re next free we could all meet up and talk. We can both give the place a try.”

Qrow smiled as they both turned to him. “Yeah, that’s a great idea. I’m working the late shift on Saturday, maybe we could come in the morning.”

“Great!” Tai slapped his shoulder, then stood back. “Anyway, I guess we shouldn’t keep you. We’ve all got places to be.”

“Well, not exactly, but I see your point. We can talk another time, maybe I’ll bring Oz over sometime this week if Oscar’s better.”

“Sure thing. I guess we’ll get going, then. Yang, you ready?”

“Sure. See you later Uncle Qrow!” She paused. “Bye Ozpin.”

Ozpin smirked at her. “Goodbye, Yang.”

They turned and walked away, and Qrow distantly heard Yang ask “…Sure it’s okay for me to eat in my work clothes?”

He took Ozpin’s hand and gently tugged him away from the bar. “So, where to?”

Oz picked up his cane so that it didn’t swing as he walked, and tilted his head. “It’s been a long time since we stopped by the Lookout. What do you think?”

Qrow grimaced. “I don’t know. Pretty sure that place is cursed after last time.”

“And this from the man who has _repeatedly_ told me that there’s no such thing as luck?”

“Ugh. Yeah, alright.”

“I’m not forcing you.”

“Nah, you’re right; the view’s nice. Come on.”

As they walked down to the seafront, Qrow told Ozpin how the day had gone, how the bar was faring, and what Tai had told them before he’d arrived. Ozpin reacted with surprise, unrestrained joy in his eyes even as his voice remained level. Tai coming back meant Qrow would no longer be Ruby and Yang’s primary guardian. It meant that after summer, they wouldn’t have to be so careful not to let word spread.

It meant freedom.

They trekked up the sandy trail to the rocky clifftop, and Qrow sat on Ozpin’s right on the rickety bench. The scrub behind them where the cliff sloped downwards had exploded into greenery with the spring, and several birds sang from the spindly trees that clung to life in the rocky, sandy soil. Sea lavenders bloomed around the edge of the clearing, swaying in the breeze coming off the ocean.

Qrow rested a hand on Ozpin’s knee and sighed.

“I’m so damn tired.” He said, having only just realised it. His eyes hurt. How long had he been up? Since before dawn, that was certain.

“You’ve been working hard.” Ozpin placed his hand on top of Qrow’s and knitted their fingers together. “For a long time. I told you it would catch up with you.” There was a half-chiding tone to his voice, but it wasn’t angry.

“Yeah.” Qrow yawned. “It’s been catching up to me for a while. At least I’m out of The fucking Albatross now. Can set my own schedule.”

“We should all be so lucky.”

“I detect a hint of sarcasm.”

Ozpin smirked in his direction. “Possibly a hint. But not everyone thrives on routine, at least not routine set by others.”

“I don’t like doing what I’m told.”

“That, my dear, has been clear as long I’ve known you.”

Qrow tilted his head and smiled. “And yet you still try.”

“It’s a teacher thing.” Oz grumbled, but the corners of his mouth quirked up. “Besides, I was under the impression that I was the exception to those sorts of rules.”

“Well, you know.” He non-answered, feeling his face getting hot. There was a long pause, and he squinted over the ocean where the sun hung low enough to start staining the clouds peach at the edges. He lowered his voice. “You know, I’d never have gotten this far without you.”

“Qrow, that’s nonsense. You have incredible willpower. You would have found your way here alone.”

“Not alone.” He shook his head. “You fixed me.”

“I did not.” Ozpin let go of Qrow’s hand and touched his face instead, making their eyes meet. “You fixed yourself. I was merely… here.”

“Well, that’s the next best thing.” Qrow conceded. “I still needed you. Deny that all you want, but I needed you.”

“I won’t deny it.” He sighed and it turned into a nervous laugh. “I needed you too. There are times when I still can’t believe that you… that _we_ faced Salem and won. I wouldn’t have done that alone.”

“Me either.”

Silence fell but for the birdsong and the low drone of the ocean on the sand below, the whip of seafoam on the flat endless plain of the beach. A gull called from somewhere down there, harsh scream caught on the breeze up to the cliff. Qrow remembered the ones flocking around the town and wondered if Tai missed them when he was away. A painful thought hit him.

“You know,” He began. “At some point I’m gonna have to tell Tai _how_ we got Salem to leave town.”

Ozpin stiffened slightly beside him. “Ah. Yes. Perhaps so.”

“No ‘perhaps’ about it.” He sighed. “He’s gonna be so mad I didn’t tell him.”

“You did it for his sake. Although I do think you should have come clean… Well, right away.”

“Yeah, well, it’s a little late for that. _And_ we got the kids involved. He’s gonna kill us both.”

“Possibly, yes. I almost think we might deserve it.”

“Yeah? Then maybe you should do the talking when we all meet up on Saturday.” Qrow smirked.

Oz nudged him exasperatedly. “I think he might respond better to his best friend of- how many years?”

“Twenty-seven.”

“-of twenty-seven years than a relative stranger.”

“You haven’t seen him mad.” He shrugged. “Then again, most people haven’t. I’m just good at pissing him off.”

“Tai isn’t the only one. You can be a little… inflammatory.”

“Don’t like doing what I’m told, inflammatory… God, why do you even _like_ me?”

“I have my reasons.” Oz smiled.

The seabird still shrieking from the beach took off, wheeling up into the air directly in front of the Lookout. With another sharp cry, it soared over their heads towards the town. They watched it go until it was a speck in the blue sky, and then turned back to the glittering ocean. Relative silence fell again, and Qrow found himself refocused on the man beside him, the warmth of his body so nearby.

“So what now?” He finally asked.

“A little more specific?” Ozpin said lazily.

“Teacher voice.” Qrow warned.

“Sorry.” He laughed. “What do you mean, what now? You mean for us?”

“Well, yeah. I mean… If the kids go back to live with Tai-”

“Which is not yet certain.”

“Well, no, but it’s worth thinking about.”

“It is. But it’s also worth being prepared for anything. And as you’ve told me many times, the needs of your nieces must come first.”

Qrow sighed. “Alright. Sure. Let’s make this a hypothetical, then. _If_ Ruby and Yang and Tai move back into the house in Patch… what do we do?”

“I suppose it depends what you want. I must warn you, though: I’m not inclined to go anywhere.”

“No, well… I was kinda wondering… I guess maybe it’s kinda soon to talk about it, but… What if we moved in together? Or…”

“Or if you moved in with me?” Ozpin finished for him.

“Yeah.” He faltered and started babbling. “I mean I’m not inviting myself anywhere, and it’s up to you and Oscar to decide, but I’m sick of my shitty apartment and if it’s just me there alone, I’ll go stir crazy after a week.”

Oz chuckled. “It would, indeed, be mostly Oscar’s decision. You know I would be happy for you to move in at a moment’s notice.”

Qrow smirked again. “Well, how could you not be?” He preened, only half-joking.

Ozpin rolled his eyes. “If you were the man you were when we met, I would find you very frustrating.” He quipped.

“Well, if you were the secret-keeper you were when we met, we wouldn’t be here.” He paused, his smile dropping slightly. “Really, though… Are you willing to do this? To… take the next step, or whatever?”

“Yes, of course. Without question.”

Qrow placed both hands on Ozpin’s smiling face and pulled them closer together. The kiss didn’t last long; the angle was awkward, but one of Ozpin’s hands landed on his hip, and he felt a chill he’d expected to fade run through his body like a speeding train. He pressed their foreheads together and smiled, his eyes still closed.

“This is crazy.” He said quietly. He’d found himself saying it a lot, lately, always seeing the world in a new, different way he was sure he’d never seen it before. And even if this time he was seeing it through rose-tinted glasses, he didn’t mind. He’d spent his whole life being cynical and pessimistic. Optimism that wasn’t faked was an entirely new thing for him. “I can’t believe someone like you would ever want anything to do with me.”

Oz laughed again. “If you were anyone else you’d see that I’m as normal as you are, Qrow.” He pulled away, but moved his hand up to stroke Qrow’s hair. “But I suppose not being anyone else is what endears you to me so much.”

Qrow snorted. “You’re not normal as in _ordinary_ , Oz, and you damn well know that. But you know, I fell for you because you weren’t like anyone else I’d ever met. So I suppose that fits.” He held Ozpin’s gaze for a long moment, warm gold and dusty red boring into one another. “And I… I love you. So much.” He huffed a short laugh. “It’s cheesy, but… You know, I never felt so safe so fast with anyone else.”

Ozpin’s eyebrows raised and he blinked slowly against the intensity of Qrow’s stare. “I love you, too, my dear. I think I have for a long time.”

“Yeah. Just takes a while for the words to sound right, huh?”

Oz nodded, and was silent, but took both of Qrow’s hands in his own. The moment was fiery like a home hearth.

“I wanna tell you this now.” Qrow continued. “No matter what goes wrong… No matter if everything goes south with the bar, and life in general, I’m gonna stick with you. Just cause I got everything settled doesn’t mean it’ll stay that way. But I’ll always be here through that. Can you… Can you stick around, too?”

“Of course. We came this far.”

Qrow nodded, and felt the honesty reverberating in the words.

The world was not perfect. Not everything was fixed, and happiness was no miracle emotion that magically appeared when things started going right. It was hard work, as was optimism, and love, and many of the other good things Qrow had discovered. But the important thing was that it was worth it. It was not the cold, sharp effort of constant cynicism. It was something rewarded with soft warmth and the knowledge you were welcome.

And sure, there was a ways to go: Oscar still regarded Qrow with a combination of wariness and scepticism a lot of the time, and Ruby and Yang were only just accepting the idea of their high school principal as a potential part of their family. But their situation had never been conventional. They would all adapt, given time.

And that was it: Time, the great equaliser, the endless pull. It would pass. Everything did. Every hardship would, eventually, drain away. Every pleasure would, too, but Qrow felt determined, and for once, _capable_ of making that last. He had succeeded. He had toned down his drinking to a reasonable level, to the point that he could make drinks for his customers without cravings. And they were _his_ customers now. Salem was gone, and so, seemingly, were her old associates. He felt safe in his hometown again.

Life was messy, and organic, pieces growing and mutating of their own accord. But Vale was green and blooming with the chilly spring. He was home.

And that was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And... That's it. This particular story is done. There are loose ends, unanswered questions, things we don't know. But we leave Qrow and Oz here on the clifftop in the eternal setting sun, in the endless chill of early spring. It makes sense.
> 
> It's been a real pleasure writing this story. I remember how terrified I was when I started posting it here, and how gratifying it was to receive any response at all, let alone one so overwhelmingly positive. I had doubts at times, but the comments I got always put me right, always dragged me back onto the path to finishing the story. I really can't thank anyone enough for reading. It's been an intensely personal and sometimes difficult journey. It's still hard to believe it's over.
> 
> Honestly, it may not be over forever! There's a lot of other stuff in this universe I'd like to explore, but as I say, this story is done. If I continue, it'll be by going back in time. I'll still be posting supplemental stuff for SDW for a bit on tumblr and twitter. And if this note seems like A Bit Much, yeah, it probably is. But I never thought I'd get here and I'm overwhelmingly happy I did.
> 
> Thank you all for reading. Keep being kind, and keep moving forward <3


End file.
